《Re:Mento Mori》Arc 1 Union of Two Cursed Swords, Chapter 1: A Happy Day
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On a cool summer morning in the northern provinces of Dengal, near a newly cleared ruin, there lay a makeshift camp, and in that camp, in a cramped tent, our hero was being forcibly awakened by a menacing presence.
"---ake ----u -----ji!"
He woke up and looked at the ceiling. His features had drastically changed when he arrived in Dengal. His eyes were now a pretty hazelnut color, and his hair was brown. The hair itself was short. Thanks to the bathing habits of this world, it was usually dirty, making his hairstyle look like some generic MC with spikes of bedhead going every which way. In terms of facial and body features, Ryuji checked off all the boxes for average.
'Guess it's not any worse than my last body, but still, this world sucks!'
"Wake your lazy ass up, Ryuji Koyanagi!"
Reality pulled Ryuji back in as his mind began to focus on what was being said. Apparently, in this situation, reality was an upset girl named Elizabeth.
He had first seen Elizabeth in the local guildhall shortly after his last party had met a grizzly end. This had marked the second time that Ryuji's party had been wiped out, leaving him the only survivor. As such, even though he was technically a grandmaster, no one wanted anything to do with Ryuji.
Elizabeth, however showing no fear and walked straight up to him, offering a job in her party. Ryuji happily accepted. He may not admit it, but he truly does appreciate everything that she's done for him.
"I'm up, damn you! I'm up! Can't a guy get some extra shut-in once in a while?"
"It's nine o clock, and I've already let you sleep for an extra hour. Geez, you're supposed to be the only one in this party who isn't a troubled child."
"Oh heaven forbid that I sleep in for one extra hour a single time and, by the way, on my birthday! And now I'm somehow comparable to those idiots we lug around." Ryuji turned around under his blanket in an attempt to ignore her.
In response, she started yanking off the blanket, and they soon got into a tug of war situation. "If you think, for a second, I give a damn whether it's your birthday or not, think again! Now get out of that bed before your birthday present is a swift kick in the ass!"
As the bickering flowed, all thoughts of that crazy dream started to fade. Then like most people who have vivid dreams, within a few minutes, he had forgotten about it completely.
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"Uh oh, is there perhaps *gasp* trouble in paradise?"
Awakened by the sound of the lovebirds fighting, a man by the name of Keith interjected from across the tent. Keith was a burly man with fine-tuned muscles. He sported a black mullet and wore fairly ordinary clothes. His attitude was that of a sarcastic jackass, and everyone who ever spoke to him would say so as well.
"Oh shut up, Keith!"x2 Like a sitcom, they responded in the exact same way then looked at each other indignantly.
"Ooooo, look at that! Ya even got yer responses linin up the same way."
"Ugh, whatever. Put on some clothes and meet me outside, okay?" Elizabeth withdrew from the tent, and Ryuji could finally turn over.
He had been hiding his morning shame. He did it because of what had happened the last time she saw it. During that escapade, Elizabeth had gleefully teased him until the sun went down.
"Wow...ya know I'm a little fucked up, but to get turned on by getting an earful from a lady, yur a real piece of work ya know that?" Keith looked at him appalled and sounded rather judgmental.
"I'm not turned on! It's the body's natural reaction to waking up!!"
"Sure, sure."
After getting dressed and being made fun of some more, Ryuji left his tent with Keith and made his way to the campfire at the center of camp. Waiting for him were Elizabeth and three others.
Ryuji wasn't particularly fond of the other three, even more so than with Keith. As such, he desired to speak with them as little as humanly possible. To Ruji, they looked just like the three stooges, and because of that fact, he often referred to them as Moe, Larry, and Curley.
"So what did you wa-"
"Oi, by the way, this little man over here gets a real kick out of getting yelled at. Why he was even standing at attention if ya know what I mean." With a thumb jerked in Ryuji's direction, Keith happily gave up the secret that Ryuji wanted to keep.
"I'll keep that in mind for later. I mean, it is his birthday, after all. It would be no skin off my back to yell at him some more." The smile she wore was a knowing one and made Ryuji avert his eyes. Elizabeth giggled after seeing the blushing Ryuji retreat back into his metaphorical shell.
It is important to note that while his mental age is somewhere in his late thirties, Ryuji's social age is still somewhere in the middle school area. As such, he has no cool rebuttal planned neither is he going to call her bluff.
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"N-nevermind that! Why aren't we packing things up? We cleared out the ruins yesterday, so there's not really a need to be here anymore is there?" Ryuji attempted to steer the conversation in a different direction. Elizabeth let it go and went along with it.
"Well, Moe over here met a traveler on the road nearby earlier, and that guy said that those Freiheit weirdoes had been spotted nearby. So I figured with it being your birthday and all, we might as well stay here."
Ryuji knew very well that the real reason had nothing to do with his birth and everything to do with those cultists. They were notorious for killing anyone and anything that crossed their path. Even experienced adventurers steered well clear of them.
"Ugh, I never should've told you about my birthday. It just feels like I'm being constantly teased today!"
"Well, it's not all bad, look we all pitched in and got you a present to celebrate. The only stipulation is you gotta open it back at the guild. No peeksies before that!" As she said that, Elizabeth tossed a sheathed dagger towards Ryuji.
He caught and inspected it skeptically. While he knew tons of skills with swords, Ryuji had never once done anything with a dagger. Meaning that this present was altogether worthless.
In fact, Ryuji could pretty much guess that the reason he had to open it at the guild was that this was all some cheap prank, and the dagger was actually made of plastic or something. He looked up and saw the three stooges trying their best to hold in laughter. Realizing that his hunch was one hundred percent right, he sighed very loudly and put the dagger away.
"Well, then what are we gonna do since we can't leave?" Ryuji asking his question plopped down near the campfire.
Keith, who had been abnormally quiet, sat down next to him. He was probably staying silent since it was Ryuji's birthday, and he knew anything that came out of his mouth would have been sarcastic drivel. Well, that and he was still laughing internally about how embarrassed Ryuji was earlier.
On the opposite side of the fire, the stooges started playing cards and discussing vulgar topics with each other.
In front of them, closer to the fire, Elizabeth sat with one knee up and her head leaning on it. "We're gonna do something you just absolutely hate, Ryuji, socialize."
"Oh, okay. So how about we kick things off by talking about how you almost wet yourself when that skeleton showed up." Ryuji desperately wanted to get back at her for what happened earlier.
Her face twisted with a mix of shame and annoyance. "Oh yeah? What about you getting caught with your pants down by that ruin guard? Who takes a piss in the middle of clearing out a ruin? How stupid do you have to be?"
"She's got ya there, friend." Keith couldn't help but start chuckling at the terrible fate Ryuji had met.
"I may have been scared, but at least I didn't almost lose my member!" Elizabeth glared at him smugly, knowing that Ryuji would be hard-pressed to find something equally embarrassing for her.
"Well, what about the uh yeah..." Ryuji was going to say something witty in return, but his words got caught in his throat as he gazed upon Elizabeth's face.
There rested an unblemished smile and clear, beautiful blue eyes. He felt the warmth of their friendship and the formation of a smile taking over his face. He still wasn't used to it, and if anyone asked, he would surely hesitate in calling these people his friends, but at this moment, he felt their bond clear as day.
And so they talked the day away. The things they discussed were trivial, but even so, her smile did not fade, and the fulfillment in Ryuji's chest did not fade either. He thought that his luck was finally paying out but still had a lingering shadow in his mind.
He felt as though something terrible was about to happen, but he didn't know what. His dream from earlier floated around his thoughts. But although his chest wouldn't loosen, he couldn't remember anything concrete, so he decided that he was just being paranoid.
"Aw, did our talks sap your mind dry? You look absolutely terrible at the moment." Elizabeth's question sounded harsh, but Ryuji could feel the good intentions underneath.
"I-I'm fine. As you were saying."
The talks continued, and dread came ever nearer.
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