《Searcher》Chapter 16: Owen
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Hearing that broken okay come from Jade’s beautiful lips when I handed her the laptop, ripped at my heart and nearly undid me. I had to force myself to walk away from her side, to curb the urge to hold onto her. I wanted to be her knight in shining armor, the hero of the story, wielding Excalibur and fighting back foes causing her pain and adding to her suffering. But that would take even more control away from her. She had to take this step on her own, close her website in her own way. She had to take back some control over her life, grab the reins that were so wrongfully ripped away from her.
I could see the insecurities hidden in her words and actions, just as blatantly as I could see the determination to be independent of her mother’s grasp. It was right there for anyone to see, anyone that was looking. You didn’t have to be an empath like me to see it in the way she teased me in the bathroom by dropping her towel, or in the kitchen with her comment about watching porn. She’s balancing precariously on a narrow ledge between order and chaos right now, and she’s grasping at anything for a sense of control.
I’ll have to keep a close eye on Jade to make sure she doesn't fall into despair. Change can be hard on some people, and losing everything like Jade did is a whole helluva lot of change to experience all at once. Ugh. I took my frustrations out on the dishes, scrubbing them harder than necessary to get the bits of food off.
At least, Jade ate breakfast. I was worried about that. I don’t think I could have handled a depressed Jade locked in a bedroom, refusing to come out, showering, or eating for that matter. I think I would go insane with worry if she retreated into herself and shut me out. It was a good sign she ate for me. It shows me that she still has that fighting spirit I’ve come to love about her. I wouldn’t have enjoyed lifting her spirit manually by pushing her buttons and starting an argument.
One can reason that as long as a person is actively engaged in an argument, then they’re still fighting. But being on the receiving end of an angry Jade didn’t sound as much fun. I kinda liked feeding Jade better than fighting with her. The last time we fought, she bested me. But that was only because I would never have hurt her and didn’t want to squeeze her too tight or risk bruising her. I could have taken her if she wasn’t who she was, but she is, so there’s no real knowing if it would have ended differently. I’m just sure it would have. Plus, I didn’t have the heart to start an argument with Jade just for the hell of it, even though it would be for her benefit. I couldn’t see myself doing it. I preferred feeding her bacon and watching her steal a piece of french toast from the plate. It was adorable.
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A brief buzzing sound interrupted my thoughts, and alerted me to a message on my tablet. I frowned at seeing Tobin’s name appear on the screen. Rinsing my hands off, I could already figure what the contents would be, what the bastard had to say. He must have been spying on Jade already, making sure she followed his orders and closed her website. Damn, he didn’t give her much time.
I sat the frying pan I had been scrubbing down in the sink, and opened the tablet to see a message from Tobin. It was a short, direct order to me. He wasn’t here to do whatever he thought should be done, so he was throwing his weight around and ordering me to do it. Bastard. You can’t leave and then try to control everything from a distance. We aren’t fucking puppets!
But, I kinda am. I’m not actually his puppet, but he’s point. He’s always point. In some societies he would be called the alpha of the group, the captain, the leader, he’s the fucking shifter with the badass monster, I’m just the empath, the healer, the lover (not the fighter) with the cool touchy feely magic that makes people feel things. A hippie.
Yep, he’s point, and I’m ok with that. Besides, he’s right about Jade. She’s scared and tense. Too tense. A lot has happened in such a short amount of time. She needs to stop worrying, and live in the moment. I knew exactly what he wanted when I read, “Take care of Jade, and leave the laptop open.” He wasn’t hard to understand.
I could envision Tobin’s method of taking care of Jade. It would be all leather and restraints, pain and pleasure, gags and safe words. He would take Jade to a completely different plane of existence by making her submit to him and relinquishing all her fears and worries over to him. It would be glorious to watch her fears melt away under Tobin’s expert hand. But he’s not here, and I’m not dominant like him. I can give Jade a sweet release, though. I can quiet her mind, and make her worries recede away on a tide of pleasure. At least, for a few minutes, anyway.
Finished with the dishes, I dried my hands and walked back into the living room. Jade had her eyes closed, her head laid back against the couch while streaks of tears glistened on her cheeks. She did it. It looked like it took a lot out of her to do, but she did it. She closed her website. I can feel her sense of loss at losing one more piece of herself. Her father, her inventory, her home, her income, her network of friends and customers, all gone. But this last step was necessary for her safety and sanity. I could have done it for her and spared her the pain it obviously caused her, judging by the glittering trails marring her sweet face. I could have shouldered the blame for her loss, her anger too, but it wouldn’t help her move past this and into what I know she is destined to be, a Searcher. My Searcher.
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I tried to quietly push the coffee table back, but the damn legs scratched against the flooring, waking my sleeping beauty. I repositioned the laptop and kneeled before her, like the humble servant I was before his queen. I wanted to worship her, taste her, bring her immense pleasure while forgoing my own desires in the process, the consummate subjugate, but she tried to stop me from lowering her pants, confusion scrawled across her face.
“What the hell!”
I felt her fear and immediately took action to assuage it. Bidding my magic to calm her fears and cloak her in a cozy haze. Take my love. Stop fighting me.
“Relax. I got you.” I grabbed her wrists, and felt the magic take hold. She smiled and released her grip on the waistband of her pants. I stripped them from her silky legs, and let them pool on the floor. My heart skipped a beat when I noticed she wasn’t wearing underwear. Of course, she isn’t. I didn’t give her any, and hers are in the wash.
I knew it was devious of me to use magic on her without her knowledge, and she’d probably kick my ass if she ever found out, but I did it for her. It’s all for her. Fuck! I sound like a psychopath blaming the victim and yelling, ‘Stop running from me! I just want to love you! Stop! Don’t call 9-1-1, I’m not into threesomes!’ Feeling uneasy with the situation, I let go of the magic, and waited several seconds, hovering over her mound for permission to proceed. With a clear mind, she made that decision. She gave the command.
Jade’s coquettish nod was all the permission needed to show her how much I cared for her. I spread her legs, opening her body up to me. She was beautiful. Her delicate skin was bare, smooth like silk, and glistened with moisture, beckoning me, begging me to lick and kiss the lustrous surface.
She was my ambrosia, and I gently swirled my tongue between her lips, lapping it up and begging for more. I worshiped her body like a starving man eating the most heavenly honey, the nectar of the gods. Jade’s expression relaxed while I nipped, lapped, and sucked her tension away, nibbling on her sensitive clit and inserting a finger inside. The tangy taste of her juices coated my tongue as I licked and kissed her slit, stroked her tender walls and felt her muscles clench around my digits. She’s perfect.
Staring intently at her face, I watched her worries recede and pleasure build. I felt Jade’s climax coming. Her muscles tensed in preparation. Moans escaped her mouth. Jade’s face scrunched up just before she orgasmed, and I added more pressure, more friction, more sensation until it was too much for her. She grasped my head, and ground her pussy against my face, demanding more. Yes! Fuck my face. I’ll take your love.
I submitted to her rough treatment, gasping for breath when I could, eager to be serving my goddess. I didn’t care if I suffocated in the process. I would die happy. At that moment, there wasn’t anything else I would rather be doing, least of all something as mundane as breathing. Take my last breath.
I felt a violent spasm, a rushing wave of ecstasy, rip through her body, drawing forth a guttural shout and watched in awe as her consciousness was launched into orbit. I continued licking her gently, even after her orgasm waned. Slowly and deliberately, I put Jade’s shattered pieces back together with my tongue. Her worries lay forgotten in the ether.
My cock strained against my pants, ridged and throbbing, aching to be inside her, to make her mine, but this wasn’t about me. This was for Jade. I was hers to do with as she pleased. Her tool, her serf, her subjugate. She laid against the couch, her countenance untroubled by previous worries. Pleased with my performance, I turned away from Jade to find the TV remote, denying my straining need, thinking only about her own. She’ll be cold when she comes down from her subhigh. I always am.
I grabbed a blanket and draped it across her quivering form before climbing behind her on the couch, and pulling her into me. We laid like that for a while, her back to my front, ass cupping my stiff cock, tormenting me with the proximity, the promise of future entanglements. A single thought kept repeating in my mind. One day…
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