“EARLY IN THE WAR, WHEN RABBITS JUST BEGAN TO RETALIATE, EXFLIBBERAGUIL’S PARENTS DIED.”

The ferret stopped, turning its small white head towards Exflibberaguil. “Would you rather tell the rest of the story?”

Exflibberaguil did not look up. Nick glanced at him with concern, wanting to make him as happy as he once was, yet also wanting to hear the end of the story.

After a few seconds without a response, the ferret sighed. “Very well then. I am obligated to continue.

“Exflibberaguil’s parents died from eating a rabbit—Exflibberaguil’s nanny, as a matter of fact. She was one of the first rabbits to receive an early protocol of a sort of poison. She was the most prone to danger, being in the household of Mustela. The poison would kill anyone who eats the rabbit after the rabbit dies. It’s very much like blowing yourself alone with your enemies using a grenade—something very popular in your war movies,” the ferret said, nodding towards Nick.

“How do you know this, if Exflibberaguil erased his memory?” Nick fired back.

“Oh! That’s right,” the ferret said, somehow smiling wider than before. “Yes, I forgot to mention—I have access to the memory in his forgetting machine. I can watch every single one of his memories, and Box has it all stored in its memory as well. Why do you think it was so easy for Box to recall Exflibberaguil’s trigger word?”

“But how do you have access to—”

“Tch. So impatient,” the ferret chided, shaking its head. “Let me continue.

“Exflibberaguil’s family killed the rabbit because of some ridiculous excuse. And, as it was very popular at the time, they ate the rabbit. A disgusting act, may I add.

“They quickly died from the poison. But Exflibberaguil was rather attached to his nana, who he called Baba. Mustela, I have mentioned, do not make great parents, and Baba acted as the only motherly figure. Exflibberaguil naturally could not bring himself to eat the meat of his Baba, and was the only one in his family to survive.

“The very next day, the war officially began. Exflibberaguil lived in a community with a lot of rabbit nannies and caretakers, and many Mustela had died the same way as his parents did. His neighborhood was one of the many that got attacked on that day, and there was a great bloodshed. Everyone seemed to have died, except Exflibberaguil, who, by some miracle, was able to escape and enter my master’s ship.

“My master was a kind man, and the real inventor of the forgetting machine. He planned to gather as many children as possible, and hoped that, with the help of the machine, the children would grow up to be healthy and bright. When he saw Exflibberaguil fighting his way through the crowd, he threw a sort of grenade to clear the path. Exflibberaguil managed to climb into my master’s ship.

“My master was not present to greet him, as he was afraid he’d scare Exflibberaguil off. However, he expected Exflibberaguil to walk around and explore the ship before doing anything, giving my master ample time to introduce himself. He did not expect Exflibberaguil to wash his bloody hands—which, you know, have poisonous rabbit blood—in the sink and contaminated the limited source of clean water.

“My master had to leave quickly to find some more water, and tranquilized Exflibberaguil to sleep. Unfortunately, he was gone for too long and Exflibberaguil awoke before he could arrive back. Exflibberaguil then decided to search for the control room, and found it easily. Caring nothing for all the signs that the ship was my master’s, Exflibberaguil took off, leaving my master behind, who faced a certain death.”

Nick was at lost for words.

“I managed to convince Box to act natural, and follow Exflibberaguil’s commands. He was, after all, the sort of child my master had wanted to save. We guided him towards the forgetting machine, but little did we know how he’d abuse it and abuse us.

“He explored all sorts of planets, doing petty thievery and then forgetting about it so he’d be able to convince his twisted self that he earned it all fairly. Then he came here, deciding that he’d play hero for a while, before inevitably go away again to some other planet and live his unfulfilling life.”

“… So, you went off to join the rabbits, who your master was fighting against?” Nick said, her voice on edge.

“No, my master did not die because of the rabbits. He died because of the Mustela,” the ferret replied evenly. “And I had always been friends with the rabbits. My master, too, but he was unable to sustain a family of rabbits that reproduced so quickly.”

“But…” Nick stared, trying to form words out of her chaotic emotions, “this is wrong!”

“Wrong?”

“Well,” Nick sighed, “don’t you see? Most Mustela are terrible, I agree. And the war had to be fought. It was inevitable. But did the rabbits have invade other planets?”

“What were they to do?”

“Let me ask you. Why was it wrong for the Mustela to slaughter the rabbits, even when the rabbits have overpopulated their planet?”

“Because,” the ferret said slowly, being careful not to fall into a word trap, “they should face their own mistake of letting the rabbits in.”

“Exactly. Everyone should face their own mistakes.”

“I suppose…”

“And would it be fair to say that the rabbits should face their own mistakes of not putting up a rule for overpopulation? Shouldn’t that mean they should take care of it themselves?” Nick asked quietly.

“And they did!” the ferret replied. “They did all they could, and it was not their fault they wanted to immigrate to other planets!”

“It’s not. But invading other planets is. Why should they come to my planet, when we have done nothing wrong?”

“They can’t trust any planet now, can they?”

“And that gives them ample excuse to invade planets? Should everyone try to murder everyone else, just because they saw a serial killer on television?”

“It’s not like that…” the ferret said, becoming a little quieter.

“THEN WHAT IS IT LIKE?” Exflibberaguil roared, speaking for the first time.

“There you are,” Nick muttered.

“Speaking now, are you?” the ferret replied. “Just ignoring the fact that you, essentially, is the cause of my master’s death?”

“Shut up!” Exflibberaguil yelled, pouncing towards the ferret. He missed by an inch.

This suddenly movement triggered Oakley’s predatorial reflexes, and she pounced as well. Timothy, unnerved by the movement, began running in circles. And Nick tried to catch the ferret herself, though she knew it was unlikely her unathletic body would be able to do much at all.

Suddenly, Oakley screeched, tearing up. Nick smelled a sort of soapy aroma. She looked to see Exflibberaguil splashing bubble solution from his wooden bottle at the ferret, who was dodging easily and gracefully.

“You damn rodent!” Exflibberaguil yelled, swinging his bottle again. A few pathetic drips came out. “Empty. Dang it!”

“Enough!” the ferret roared.

With a sudden, ear-piercing whine, Nick was forced to the ground by some invisible force. Her headache came back, but it seemed to affect everyone. She glanced fearfully at the ferret, who seemed unaffected. She could barely raise her head.

“Finally,” the ferret said. “Silence.”

“What is this?” Exflibberaguil demanded, his voice sounding tense and strangled.

“Oh, just a little gravity device I have been tinkering with. It can greatly annoy people. In fact, I’ve tested it on you and Nick a couple of times, and it worked splendidly. You remember those strange fights you always have? A little gravity always puts you on edge. Of course, my main test subject is that policeman. In fact, Jake, come in!” the ferret called.

Nick could not summon the energy to turn around, but she heard, stiff stomps coming out from one of the hallways.

“How does this work?” Nick asked, unaware of how scared she sounded.

“Oh, I don’t know. It was another one of my master’s inventions, though I kept this away from Exflibberaguil’s thieving hands.” The ferret paused. “Do you hear that?”

Nick did indeed hear it, but she did not answer. There was the sound of quick footsteps echoing from one of the corridors, growing louder as it approached. No one spoke as they awaited for the person to come closer.

“HIYYYYA!”

A broken pot crashed against the wall, missing the ferret by several feet. Nick recognized the heavy panting of the doctor, and she forced herself to turn around so she could see him.

“No! Doctor—” she cried, but the weight on her chest made breathing difficult.

“Have you all been beaten by this ferret?” the doctor said, still panting. He shed his white lab coat which he had been wearing for so long. “Huh? Huh? You want to fight?”

“Ah, yes,” the ferret said coyly. “I was wondering where you were. And this chip pot, I believe, is that of the violemortum’s. That is why it died…”

The ferret’s ignorance of the doctor flamed his temper, and the doctor ran towards the animal. “You will pay!”

“Hm. I assume you took this when you were snooping in the control room?” the ferret said smoothly, slipping away as the doctor ran towards it. The doctor howled in pain as his outstretched fingers were crushed by the wall.

“No matter,” the ferret sighed. “Down you go.” The doctor was sent to the ground by the same pressure Nick was under.

“Don’t do this,” Nick said, trying to sound cool and collected even though her face was smashed against the floor and she was utterly at the ferret’s mercy.

“Let me finish that sentence for you,” the ferret said. “Don’t do this. Kill me, but not my friends. They did nothing wrong.”

“That sounds much more heroic,” Nick agreed, trying her best to force the words out of her compressed lungs. “But actually, I just don’t want to die, since it’s pretty obvious that sending me to death would be very easy for you. And it would be nice if you spared my fri—acquaintances. And even better if you spared my planet.” Nick paused, catching her breath. “Actually, reverse that order. Please spare my planet before the rest of these idiots.”

“Hm,” the ferret said, “Five minutes. Convince me.”