I woke up in the Physics lab.

How do I know? That I don’t know.

Except this time I woke up with all my memories. Not that anything was missing in the first place. I just couldn’t remember them at first.

Now, however, I can.

With my head still buried in my arms on the desk, I went through everything that happened at Homeroom.

First question: What the fuck?

Second question: Where am I?

Third question: What the hell is going on?!

Fourth Question: What the hell happened to Asha?

I can come up with many questions that are proper to ask in such a situation. But acquiring the answer will be another problem. And I don’t think it’ll be easy.

Especially if that decay-at-will scythe carrying impossibility is involved.

I sat up straight, and to my demise, found my physics teacher, Mr. Leatherbee at the teacher’s desk, busy with paperwork. And there was none other but us, but that wasn’t surprising anymore.

He was wearing the usual formal shirt and slacks, although the tie was missing. He always wears a tie. I have lost count of how many times I was reprimanded for not wearing my tie properly, as if loosening it was a big crime. Besides, I never found having a noose around the neck exciting. I’m not gonna judge him for it, though. A man’s gotta have fetishes, right?

“Mr. Lockehart,” said Mr. Leatherbee, pulling me out of my reverie.

“Yes?” I replied.

“Do you know why you’re here?” he asked, not lifting his head from his work. Another thing I dislike about him and such teachers are the generic “I don’t need to look at you and recognise you while I’m talking because I am the teacher and you are the piece of shit student” attitude they have going on.

“No, I don’t.” I replied as-a-matter-of-factly. “Why don’t you enlighten me… sir.” I said sourly.

“Alright.” replied Mr. Leatherbee. He stood up, surprising me, and took off his glasses and flinged it on the table.

He took a deep breath and huffed, as if frustrated. Crossing his arms, he glowered at me.

How did you dodge my scythe?

Aw fuck, not this shit again.

“Death?”

Yes

“The fuck do you want?”

Your soooooouuuuuuullllll…

“...what?”

Just kidding. But seriously though, Howdja do it?

“I didn’t?”

What?

“I was just walking.”

...just walking?

“Yes.”

Nothing more?

“Yes.”

...You sure?

“Oh my god, fucking YES!!”

Ok ok.

“...”

You’re sure?

“Groan*”

Okay okay, jeez. Chill out.

“Where am I, anyway?”

Oh, uhm. This might sound bonkers, but I’m in one of your memories.

“So you went through my memories?”

No. I mean yes. I mean...sigh* Its complicated.

“Indeed. Going through someone’s memories do complicate stuff when you’re standing right in front of that someone. It’s like getting caught while reading someone else’s diary.”

I know right?

“...”

…

“...”

…

“...you’re not really Death, are you?”

How did you...? I mean, Pshh* yeah right. I’m so Death.

I crossed my arms.

No really, I am. I am the Deathliest Death that ever Deathed, okay?

“Uh-huh. Right.”

...You’re not buying it are you?

“Gee," I batted my eyes. "What gave you that idea?”

Ugh, you don’t have to be so sarcastic about it. What gave it away?

“You don’t feel like Death.”

That’s it?

“And you’re a girl.”

How do you know that?

“Your voice.” I pointed out.

That doesn’t prove anything!

“You chose to be a girl at first. Now, to either confuse me or something else, you took on the visage of my teacher. Oh, and you hate ties.”

So, you figured out my gender because I didn’t wear some stupid tie?

“Hyup. Now, why don’t you answer me some question.”

Uh, okay. I don’t have anything better to do.

“How did I die?”

I don’t know.

“Wait what?” I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t surprised.

I don’t know.

“Huh.” Well that settles things. There’s also chances that she’s lying. Guess I’ll find out eventually.

“What are you, then?”

A reaper. Duh!

“I know right? Cause I totally knew that from the beginning.”

Is that sarcasm?

“Yes, reaper-girl, it is!”

Oh.

“...”

…

Stare*

What?

“Well?”

Oh, right.

“And stop being my physics teacher. That way I might actually take you seriously.”

Oh, right. Almost forgot about that.

With a puff of smoke, the Mr. Leatherbee with an oddly young and girly voice was replaced by a figure wrapped in black robes. There was no way to discern if the figure was a guy or girl. The only skin poking out was that of her hands hanging out of the sleeves which, oddly, looked torn. No sign of any scythe. And by the way, she was levitating.

She hovered above the seats and zoomed to one next to me making only a whisper of wind. A whisper accompanied with not a stench of the grave dweller, but that of bananas.

Hmm, so she smells like bananas. Why do I feel like it is a sign to some pain in the ass?

Ask what you must.

“Right.”

====================================================================

Dangling by the shield, a certain brown draugr awoke to the sound of a rushing rapids. Normally, just the sound shouldn’t have been enough, so the hammering waves that crashed on it at intervals. That or the creaking shield that had gotten a random root stuck through the cracked edge of her shield, which had kept it from being swept away for so long.

At first, it tried to reach for the upper part of the shield, only to find that it has gotten its upper arm all the way in the handle. Sighing, it tried to dangle in an attempt of dislodging the shield, only to have the rhythm interrupted by annoying waves.

After many other attempts, it became convinced that it was doomed to stay stuck here. Stuck, until mold grows all over its arm, till the skin and armor tears apart at the gradual bombardment of waves, till the end of...huh?

To its surprise, it caught a flicker of grey dots. But was it? For all it knew, it could just be some hallucination of its despair addled mind. Or was it?

It could only wait and see.

=====================================================================

I found myself staring at root-and-vine textured ceiling of some sort of cave, with the sound of rushing streams in the background as some sort of distinct lullaby. I say distinct, because its making me want to rest here till forever, but that may just be one of the quirks of being undead.

Had a long and interesting discussion with the reaper. So here’s what I learned:

The place I am at is a catacomb that has been spatially removed from the real world for security measures. In other worlds, this catacomb is some sort of pocket dimension of some rich fellow who happens to be resting here. To make matters juicy, the hotshot was some extremely powerful fellow who died with a motherload of regrets, which in turn allowed other residents he so generously allowed to share his tombs with to turn into draugr and other sorts of undeads. Also, some sort of dungeon was born due to some sort of magical reaction with the mana dispersing off of the 1st class teleporter which is the only way to get out of the godforsaken place and the undeathly energy coming off the rich-boy’s corpse. This also caused the teleporter to move to the end of the dungeon, which is a fantastic thing (Note the sarcasm). As a cherry on top the dungeon is a few centuries old, which means its impossible for me to even attempt to attack its weakest mobs. Besides the place, there are a buttload of things that I learnt. The most interesting is The System. It turned out to be some sort of way to interact with the world. Also The System appears differently to different people, but in the end they are all the same. Kinda like how people are different from one another. The punchline, however is that only the Alpha version is available to me due to my brain is not in my head. Further questioning was no longer needed to understand what’s going on. You see, draugrs are the viking version of the Egyptian mummies. So, both have their organs removed from the prior to having preservatives and other stuffings stuffed in them and then wrapped into linen. Or linoleum, in the Scandinavian tradition. So I need to find out wherever they had put this body’s preserved innards a millenia ago. Till then I’ll have to deal with a buggy system. Just before parting, she gave me a blank book. After giving her a questioning glance she explained that this book will help me out. Other than that, she said something about staying away from the freezer. Either she was trying to be cryptic for the first time in her life or she is totally nuts. The latter seems more viable.

So, after going through the info I got, I decided that laying on my back isn’t gonna get me otta this hole. So I stood up and looked around to see wherever the hell I ended up at.

The place seemed like some underground river, which is kind of alarming because I thought this whole thing was in a cut-off dimension. I say alarming because I’m trying to make sense of this bullshit and I’m sure in some dark ugly corner my brains frying up. And if that ain’t alarming, then I don’t know what is!

Anyways, time to start a journey with me and my book. My book which… I can’t seem to find. I look around the place I was lying, which was at the side of the huge root-thingy which thankfully beached my floating body. I’m surprised how my body didn’t just smash into pieces, considering how fast the water is flowing.

I’m getting off track. The book ain’t here. So all I can do is push on without it.

The place is something though. The walls have red mosses growing on them, bioluminescent ferns, adorably tiny glowing spiders eating other bioluminescent insects. It may sound like the whole place is a freaking disco party but the light is just enough to barely make out your feet and the root-mat that covers the whole floor. Most of the light comes from the stream, as it reflects the little light the plant-life makes and reflects it many times by its constantly flowing surface. I don’t know much about caves, but this is totally fantasy-like. Makes you wonder just what sorts of mutations and endemism the creatures organisms here went through. I wonder what will happen if I take them out and release them into caves that are not cut off from the world.

I wonder if all of them can access the system or just sentient ones.

That reminds me…

System, I said

“Hairrragh” came out of my mouth.

Aaaaaannd, nothing happened. Yay!

Now I’m starting to think that everything she said was a total bull.

Man, I so want to update my Status by dissing that bi-

STATUS

Name:

None. Choose one? Y/N

Class:

Sub-Classes:

Level:

2 / 15

Race:

Undead

Monster Classification:

Draugr

Type:

Tier 2

Rarity:

???

Title:

Mad Polisher, The Bold, The Fool, Generic Gamer, Typical Shut-in, Casual Loner

Divine Protection:

None

Attribute:

None

Follower:

None

Spouses

None

Health:

-27

Mana:

10

Perception:

10

Charm:

7

Strength:

13

Dexterity:

30

Vitality:

8

Endurance:

40

Intelligence Quota:

136

Wisdom:

79

Agility:

28

Luck:

@#^>~

Active Effects:

Dessication (Mild), Well-preserved, Boldness, Foolishess, Calm Mind +, Fortified Mind +, Silent, Schizoid Personality Disorder (Certified)

What the...