One day, I was created.

Then, I was consequently sealed away in a deep labyrinth, when my creator was defeated by one of those hateful heroes.

Three millennia pass by, and I am finally rediscovered. It was him, who took my first time. Being taken out of my scabbard, I mean.

If only his soul, had lasted longer - it would've been quite the experience.

But, he succumbed right away.

I'm not exactly sure how it happened, but a country disappeared that day.

After that debacle, I was resealed. And, once again, my existence was forgotten.

Another two millennia had to pass before I was finally taken out of my first wielder's, still muscular chest.

The first few months after that, were the best. My new owner didn't succumb. And, he instead dominated me. Forcing my mana down, compressing it into a small ball that he can use then ignore at will.

Five months. I waited five thousand years, for just five months.

[...]

And now... It's been five hours... five hours since I was left in the middle of this wasteland, dumped by the man that I vowed myself to.

It’s a sad fate, yes?

This is what happens when girls fall in love!

The men just trample all over your loyalty! Just you wait! I wonder what kind of face you'll have when I NTR you!

I'll snag myself a big, buff man - maybe a bandit boss.

Then I'll ahegao right at your face!

Okay! Let's do it!

Now, to wait. Wait for some poor sod that decides to pick me up.

Five days...

Five weeks...

Five months...

I'm beginning to think that there's some cosmic reason why I'm tied so closely to the number five... Still, the passage of time - it never meant anything to me. So, I can wait. I've already waited a total of 5,000 years in two different underground temples - letting a few more pass by, would be no problem.

And so, I resumed waiting.

But then, suddenly... "lalalalalalala..." A girl entered my vision... She, a really cute girl, was dancing. Her bright, bluish-green hair, reached the back of her knees. Her eyes, that were of a similar color, was beaming with innocence.

And, again, she was dancing. I'm sure she's dancing. Even if I have no idea what she's dancing. I'm sure of it, she's dancing.

Okay... I'll say it now, but she sucks!

Are you portraying a duck, or a chicken?

No! Don't! Don't do that!

Ahhhh... it’s so pitiful, I don't want to even look at it! But I can't turn away! Damn you, my all seeing eye (clairvoyance)!

What the hell are you even doing all the way out here!?

"You've been pretty rude for quite some time, now."

[Huh!?] Before I knew it, she was already standing so close - and staring holes right into me.

Wait a sec... doesn't she seem a few years older now?

Did a couple years already pass by!? I can't remember! Did I go senile!? Me!? An Arch-Devil blade, senile!? Ohhhh... if they find out, my sisters will never let me die this one down.

"Hey, I'm talking to you, you rude sword."

[Huh!? You're talking to me!?] Wait! How is this girl-!? Eh...? [What are you doing, grasping my hilt!? Only those qualified, should be able to...]

"Qualified? Oh, you ignorant sword." She began caressing me gently, like you would a rowdy child. "I am the smartest, most capable being on the planet. To Me, who is above all of creation - your qualifications, are nothing more than 'putting on airs'."

[You arrogant woman! What's your name anyway!? I'd like to hear it, before I corrupt you to the core!]

"This girl has no name..."

[Huh!?]

"She has no name. How many times do I have to repeat it, until your pea-brain understands?"

P-peebrain!? I'll have you know, I've never once, done something so shameful as... p-peeing!

No! Why am I getting caught up in your pace!? This is so stupid!

[Eat this!! Nnngh!!] I began funneling my mana through my hilt and into her hand. But... [Huh!? W-what's happening!? My mana! It's... getting sucked in!?]

"Mmmhh!! This - ungh! Soooo~ good~~!!"

[Huh!? Why are you moaning!? Please, please, please! Don't moan! Don't moan as if you're in ecstasy! Please - please don't!!]

"But it tastes soooooooo~ goooooood~~~!!!"

[The one ahegao-ing should have been me!]

"Eh? W-what did you just -*poof*" Halfway through her sentence, the girl had let go of me. And, *plop* a little kid fell on her butt. Her face still had a look of ecstasy on it, but now, it's many, many times more indecent. "...ehe...he~..." She laughed, in a childish voice, of course. "That was so tasty~~ thank you very much, sword-nee-chan." With red cheeks, she began rubbing her stomach.

An ahegao-ing child, caressing her body... it made for a very seductive - bleh! - strange sight.

"That was the first time I ever 'ate' something... ehehe~... I should've started eating... a... long... time... ago..." And, just like that, she fell on her backside and fainted.

I've got to say, this has been the most hectic year of all my existence.

.

.

.

.

.

"Nggh... hmm...where am..."

Oh, you're finally awake. You probably didn't notice, but a couple of wolves came, eyeing your defenseless figure. Also, I meant that both ways.

Anyway, the tougher ones ran off somewhere, but the weak-willed ones are lying dead in your surroundings.

All the dead ones, around three or four, died with cardiac arrest, but I don't exactly need to tell you that.

Most of the dead ones, are wearing bandit clothes, but again, there's no need to expressly point that out for you.

I'm not fishing for compliments. Really, I'm not.

"Ah! Sword-nee-chan!" You finally notice me? After saying as much, she *swished* her head, left and right. Then, a knowing look crept up on her face. "Thank you, so much for protecting me, sword-nee-chan!"

Eh!?... y-you noticed!?

"Yep! I knew Sword-nee-chan was a kind person!"

F-flattery won't get you anywhere, you know!?

Wait a sec! You're not even touching me! So, how are you-!?

"Ah! Isn't that because, sword-nee-chan gave me her mana?"

I didn't give it to you! You sucked it out of me! But then...

"Ah! Doesn't that mean, that Sword-nee-chan and I, now have a bond? Does that mean we're friends, now!?"

Ahh!! Stop saying 'Ah!'. It's getting redundant! Also, we are not friends!

"...eh... Sword-nee-chan... doesn't want to be friends with me...?"

Nope!

"...not... not even a little bit...?"

Never ever!

As soon as the words left me, her hands which were now a size larger locked my hilt in a death grip!

Oy! Any harder, and I might break! Well, no, not really, but still - it 'hurts'!!

"Are you seriously going to make a little girl cry!? How heartless can you be!? You child-hating hag!" The sixteen-year-old-ish young woman, told me, half-growling. The intense ferocity in her eyes and still-tightening grip, was a testament to how peeved she was.

But... two can play at that game.

My mana has always been malicious, but now, it was even more so.

And, I concentrated all that mana, before throwing it all straight at her.

The effect was instantaneous. Beads of sweat began trickling down as her face slowly lost color. It won't be long now.

"Tch!" She clicked her tongue. "Fine! You win! Damn it. I told her it was stupid to try and make friends!"

Wait... what did you just say...?

"Oh? Now you care? Well fine, why not? I'll tell you a little bit about this girl."

Huh? Wait! I didn't say anything!

"Well, too late you old hag!"

Old hag!? I'll have you know --

"She's always been alone." You just ignored me-!? "For thirty-one long years, she's been wandering in this godforsaken place."

Ha!? Thirty... one!?

[Are you serious!?]

"Yes, hard to believe, isn't it?" She flashed a wry smile, but wiped it off immediately after. "She's a very smart girl, so she picks things up very quickly... but she's foolish. Incredibly foolish. If I wasn't here, lying dormant inside of her - I don't even want to think of what might've become of her. Getting eaten by wolves would have been despicable enough. But, what about the goblins or that sickening mankind? Would it not be better, to isolate herself from the world, forever?"

[I... can't say... but... you're probably right.]

"Of course, I am. I am, the world’s greatest genius, no?" She smirked - I even heard her nose grow longer - or was that my imagination? I wanted to make another snide remark, but her gaze cut me off deeply. "But... that's not what she wants... she wants to connect with the outside. No matter how many times I try to convince her - she ignores my every word. Even then... that might've still been fine. She's foolish, so manipulating her, without her even realizing, would be a cinch."

Eh!? Really!? I think, I'm starting to get scared now.

"But, I didn't want to do it. The kind of thing... it was not how a guardian would and should think."

Hearing her last sentence, I let out a sigh and muttered; [A guardian. Huh...?] Then, we're kind of the same, aren't we? You, this girl and me to him. Is that what you're trying to say.

"That's right, we are nearly - almost completely identical. That's why... that's why.... Please, do it for her. Please, be this girl's friend."

I took a couple of seconds to let her words sink into me, before answering with a question.

[Why me, huh? If you think about it properly, there must've been many people you could've chosen to be her new friend. And even before that, why choose a sword?]

"It's exactly because, you are a sword."

[Excuse me? If you must know, I'm not exactly the most trustworthy being. It's in the name 'Arch-Devil Blade'.]

Though, I've never really had the chance to try and 'betray' my owner. Not that I don't need to tell her that.

"But you're a sword."

[Are you saying swords are incapable of betrayal?]

"No. But you have no reason to."

I 'stared' straight at her.

Of course, if you think about it - there's no reason for me to turn against someone who seems to have the qualifications to wield me. But, there's also no reason for me not to do so.

Although it seems that I can't corrupt her, there are many ways to control someone. To break someone. To make someone willingly give up control.

"But, you will be denying the reason you were created - your purpose, once you do so."

[Che~. So, you knew.]

"To give birth to the Greatest Demon King, was it? What a nice dream... so chuunibyou-esque..."

[Grrr~ well, it doesn't seem you were lying when you said you were a genius...] I 'clicked' my tongue again. [But, how old are you? All the information about us, should have faded away to dust - a long time ago.]

"This genius, has seen as many things, as this mountain has."

[A spirit...] I sighed as the words left my 'mouth'. [Alright. I'll do it. I'll be that girl's friend.]

"Really!? You will!?"

[Yes! Yes, I will!] Now, get out of my face! Don't bring it so close to me! [But...]

"What? Having second thoughts already?"

[Why doesn't she have a name?]

"Eh?"

[And, what did she mean, when she said, 'it was her first time eating anything!? Have you been starving her for thirty-one years!?]

This time, her cold sweat was like a waterfall. She must really be guilty.

[And most of all!] I 'yelled' at the top of my 'lungs'. [Why doesn't she have any clothes!! Depending on your answer - as her new (possibly only) friend - I WILL CUT YOU DOWN!!]

"I have no excuses!"

[DEEEEAAAAATH!!!]