《Abnormal Days》Disingenuous Chapter 4
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"Amelia, I've got an idea. Can you help me?"
"Hmm? Oh now, you need me hmm? What did you say again? 'Butt out' was it?"
"Oh come on, don't hold it against me! I was really agitated that time!"
"Hahaha~ Don't take things so seriously, Fish, lighten up a little..."
No. You should take things more seriously.
"... I was joking around, Fish. Did you lose your sense of humour after becoming a ghost? I'm your gracious savior, as long as you're a good boy I'll help you."
And so I told Amelia about my plan and the things I had found. She helped me brush up the plans a little and she gave me some tips on words and phrases to use in my next conversation with Jun Ling. She also gave me some impromptu acting lessons. To liven up my expressions, she said.
Soon, Jun Ling awoke. In her room. And I was waiting there.
"Shun! Get out of my room now!"
"Hmm? And what would I do that for?"
I put my hand on her drawer. She looks visibly upset.
"Jun. Do you really still think you are a fake when you are able to show those kinds of reactions?"
"Yes. Nothing has changed about that. These feelings do not belong to me. I am not Jun Ling."
"Then you won't mind if I open your top drawer?"
"G-go ahead. That drawer isn't mine, you don't have to ask me for permission."
She's really forcing herself.
"Hmm~! The drawer's kind of shallow. Are you hiding something from me, Jun?"
"N-no... I'm not..."
I pull out the entire top compartment, place it on the floor then peer inside as if noticing the secret compartment.
Suddenly she lunges at me. It surprised me although I was ready and expecting something to this degree.
"Please, don't look at what's inside! I'll do anything!"
"He doesn't have to look inside."
Amelia and I blink at each other. As if communicating.
Amelia. Do it.
Got it. Fish.
"No! Don't tell him!"
"Tell him about? Your kinky reading habits? Your perverted games? Or maybe, it's your sexy, erotic lingerie?"
"Aaaaaaah! Please stop!"
Jun reaches for Amelia holding the secret compartment but I hold her down.
"Or maybe... I should tell him about..."
Jun starts crying as loud as she can and struggles even harder than before.
"... your little stalker picture book of him?"
That's right. Li Jun Ling. Was my stalker. And I never realised it. Truthfully, I'm not too perturbed about her stalking me, I'm more worried about how I never noticed her taking pictures of me from so close up. I really was that blind and self-absorbed huh...
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"Oh look, here's one of Jun going into the restroom, one of him in class, one of him during basketball and another of him in the infirmary!"
Jun was still struggling to get out of my grip.
"But this little picture book is the least of your worries isn't it?"
Least of her worries? But I thought that picture book was the only thing left in there?
As soon as those words were out of Amelia's mouth, Jun heightened her efforts to wriggle out of my grip again.
"Ah~ I wouldn't have to stoop this low if Fish here could've just convinced you normally. But we had to resort to this..."
She had a black book in her hands.
This was the most unsettled I'd ever seen Jun. But she wasn't moving at all. Not struggling. The look on her face just screamed despair.
"This is your diary, isn't it? I took it out earlier today when you guys went on your little date. I didn't want Shun to read it and possibly ruin my whole plan."
What is she saying? I don't understand.
"Explain, Amelia."
"Well it's simple really. I knew that Jun Ling here would probably have a freak out realising she wasn't the real Jun Ling so I did a little preparation when I found this little treasure trove. And to be clear. This is the real thing. I confirmed it. It's the diary which belonged to the real Li Jun Ling who lived here before. How about I read a few passages from it? Shun, you might understand better then. Ahem."
In a mockingly sweet tone, Amelia began.
"Dear Diary, today I had an idea to get closer to Zhang Shun. I paid one of the boys who hated Zhang Shun to injure him just enough so that he couldn't play any more matches. After that, I told off the other boys for stalling and they went to carry him to the infirmary. I helped to carry him too. However he didn't notice me at all. But that was okay. Because now that he was injured, he'd stop focusing so much on basketball and would pay more attention to me who had helped him."
No... Li Jun Ling isn't that sort of person. Actually... what kind of person is Li Jun Ling? I can't answer that. I thought I knew. But I didn't.
"That... that isn't true. I love him. It was just a mistake..."
Jun Ling was whimpering.
Amelia began her tirade again.
"What isn't true? That Li Jun Ling sabotaged him and ruined his career? That Li Jun Ling made him suffer so that she could get closer to him? It really was retribution that she drowned in the river."
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"N-no... Shun, please don't hate me. I'm sorry. I never should have done it. I didn't know you would get so hurt..."
For some reason. Right now. I feel. At ease. Calm. Disturbingly calm. Refreshed. And also a new sense of relief.
"Hahaha!"
No. I've not gone insane. But did you realise what Jun just said there?
"Shun?"
"You just admitted that you are Li Jun Ling."
Amelia's plan worked. As usual, Amelia leaves out certain bits of the plan from me though... I kind of hate that about her.
Jun's face clearly showed that she realised the implications of what she just said as well.
"But that doesn't prove..."
"Yeah, you're right. But it proved something else Amelia and I had thought about. No matter how well I got to know Jun Ling during the 40 year dream, there's no way I would never have been able to replicate a side of her I had never seen. In other words, I wouldn't have been able to create the you that is here now. The fact that you knew about this diary and its contents, it proves that it wasn't my desire that created you. It was Jun Ling's desire, to be alive, to be here. In fact, you are Jun Ling. Down to every last detail."
"But I'm just a copy..."
"No, you're not. People aren't so easily copied. Why do you think Fish's anger towards himself didn't create a human version of him to attack him? Because his soul still resided in his body. The town of dreams can only create inanimate objects, and vessels but not souls to inhabit those vessels. In fact, there has never ever been another person created in this way before. You could say that you were made from the very remnants of Li Jun Ling's soul and desires. Probably instead of going to the afterlife, your soul attached itself to Fish and followed him till the town of dreams. You are the original."
Jun visibly relaxed every muscle in her body, hearing that. I was relieved too.
Everything was finally resolved at last... Phew.
"Thank you, Amelia. You really bailed me out of a bad spot this time. You're always helping me, someday I'll return the favour."
"Hmph. Return the favour once you've got your body back. You guys sure are crazy you know. Warping reality and reviving the dead... Oh. And you two lovebirds have fun now~ My pager is buzzing. I'm going to solve some other supernatural phenomenon elsewhere. Oh and Fish?"
"Yeah Amelia?"
"Call me and tell me the details later."
She makes a vulgar stroking gesture with her hand and winks at me.
"Oi! Despite the emotional episode we just had, you still can't put a filter on your banter?! And I thought ghosts can't even do that!"
"You won't know till you try it!"
Jun Ling is glaring at Amelia, out of jealousy? Maybe anger? She realises I'm looking at her and stops though.
"Shun, I'm sorry about everything up till now. Stalking you, getting you hurt and always lying about myself. But... I really, really want to keep staying with you... If you'll accept this terrible girl."
"It's alright. I always had an inkling you weren't that good. It makes me happier actually. It was tough you know. Trying to live up to the dreams and expectations of someone, that perfect. In the dreamworld, you always only showed me your good side so I did have my doubts."
"I'm really curious, Shun. Why did you accept me again despite all the horrible things I've done?"
"Well they were certainly terrible things to do. Back then I would've definitely hated you but I'm different now, mentally and literally. It's all in the past so why don't I just let it go? You regret doing it as well so I'm even more sure that you'll never do it again. And I'm more curious to know what you see in me. What could be so possibly interesting about me?"
"Don't talk down about yourself like that. You're better than you think."
... We sit in silence for a bit. Just enjoying each other's presence.
This mood. It's pleasant. And comforting. A good time for cracking a joke!
"So... 'Werewolf with Abs and the Muscular Lycan'."
"S-shut up. You insensitive jerk."
"Ahahaha! I much prefer the you now. Much more than that perfect Jun Ling who I could never figure out. This imperfect Jun Ling who shouts when she's angry, cries when she's sad, reads dirty books and lies to hide those imperfections. It's so much more... human. So much more genuine."
This town... has become a town where Jun Ling never died. Where she has lived and always lived.
And she may not exactly remember our time spent together in the dreamscape but her feelings do.
I can continue to live in a town like this, where she is. I want to be human again.
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Atlas
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