Chapter Fifteen

Transformation

Everything hurt. That was the first thing that came to mind. The blackness was all-consuming, and even when Karou opened her eyes, there was more blackness. The air felt viscous; she was free to float, but it made her limbs felt heavy rather than light. The illusion wasn't air or water at all; instead, Karou found herself suspended in blood.

Grasping at her throat, it burned like she had swallowed the sun, and no matter how many times she gulped down saliva, it didn't ease. Her muscles ached and burned, too, as if she'd overworked every fibre to the state of fraying. Even her bones didn't feel at home inside her; they twitched and creaked. The pain that gripped her stomach was like nothing else; she imagined her insides bursting open and then regenerating, only to explode again. She felt fragile, like a flower forced into blooming over and over. It was tiring, the accelerated, excruciating growing pains of transformation. Eventually, the heat got to be too much, and she screamed out into the black, bloody abyss, but there was no sound.

When Karou immerged out of unconsciousness, it was jolting like waking up from sleep paralysis. She hadn't moved yet but her skin felt raw; perhaps this is what it would've felt like to be flayed, she mused. It was so hot, so hot which caused her next thought; was this the state of burning she'd be condemned to for eternity - was she dead, was this Hell? She'd prayed for Heaven, even if she didn't honestly believe either realm existed. The end had felt so sweet; perhaps this was her punishment for taking her last sleep in his arms. Regardless of how horrid her fate might've turned out, a smile tugged at her lips when she thought of her death. Why could she still smell him? He had to have been close; his cologne and notes of his natural scent filled her nose as if he were only inches from her face; that or she was laid on his chest breathing him in, like when they'd laid in bed sleeping and warmed by the sheets.

Blinking rapidly to bring her vision into focus, Karou recognised where she was, the unit, in the lounge. The scatter cushion's texture under her cheek scratched her skin - she'd never noticed the way the fabric felt before. Her legs kicked free of the blanket, and that was when she awoke to fresh pain. It wasn't as immersive as it'd been during her 'sleep', but now her skin felt tight and uncomfortably stretched over her body in a way that itched. It was hot and irritating, but she pushed through it. Somewhere in her discovering the countless abnormalities of her new state, she caught a scent on the air again. It was so intense and close. It was Warren. Her head turned and homed in on him, sat, slumped, and sleeping in the corner adjacent to her.

Nothing about the last few minutes felt real, her mind was hazy, and the atmosphere was dreamlike. The technicoloured world around her seemed more vivid somehow.

Her feet carried her three short feet over the floorboards in a split second as if they had a mind of their own. Without reserve, Karou climbed back onto the couch and knelt next to him as he laid there none the wiser about her waking. Looking at Warren was both familiar and new. To her reborn eyes, his hair appeared glossier than she'd noticed before; she could focus on each strand, all brown beside the occasional grey one at his temples, but even they twinkled; a perfect imperfection. The angles of Warren's cheekbones, nose, and brow were symmetrical as always, but where she'd once thought his complexion cold-looking like marble, her improved eyesight offered her a different view of him; there was a slight blush under his cheeks. Karou didn't realise that that glow was down to the amount of blood she'd given to him.

Karou continued to study him, down to the slightly longer stubble poking through his chin. It wasn't often Warren allowed his grooming to slip so that he looked nearer rugged than sharp, but she decided she liked it; it suited him. Though the acute angle of his jaw had gained her attention, she was quickly distracted by the pulsing jugular vein that ran between the tendons of his neck. Her throat felt dry, and she licked her lips at the sight of him; all of him was more alluring than he'd ever seemed previously. Like an out-of-body experience, Karou witnessed her hand reaching out to touch Warren's face, but before her fingertips contacted his skin, Karou drew her hand back in surprise. He wasn't cold anymore.

"Warren," Karou uttered his name.

There needed to be no further prompting; Warren woke up immediately. His silvery-blue eyes blinked open and beheld Karou's face. He strained to refocus when he found her lingering closer to him than anticipated. "Karou?" He asked, shuffling his way to sitting upright.

Engaged with her wide black eyes as they locked onto his, Warren could see her thirst clearly, though that was a given; it could be dealt with later. More than anything, he spoke into life what pleased him the most. "You're awake."

"What happened?" She whispered.

"I-..." Warren didn't know how to say what he needed to, to explain, but he couldn't take his eyes off her. The way she looked at him with more than just a passive fascination captivated him. He noticed as much detail about her even though he'd always seen her with vampiric eyes. You're going to be twenty forever. Warren thought to himself as he looked at her.

"Hm? Did you say something?" Karou asked, tipping her head to the side in her inquisitive and bird-like manner.

"No. I just thought..." He whispered. Karou was reaching out with her mind; he could feel it. Telepathically, she was searching for him to latch onto.

Karou had heard his stray thought like a whisper in the wind. Now she was spinning about in her head hunting for the sound's origin.

Can you hear me? Warren thought, leaving her a small piece of bait to catch.

While she was trying to grasp onto Warren's thoughts, her own was distracted, and she wasn't thinking about controlling her body at all. She reached out and touched his lips like she was trying to figure out where his voice came from. It was faint but audible. Confused, she found his lips never moved; he wasn't speaking, but she could hear him. Was this some kind of trick? How are you doing that? Karou wondered.

Not having any idea how to block him from her mind yet, Warren heard her loud and clear. The wonderfully pure feeling of amazed curiousity that came with her words was eye-opening. How different Warren seemed to her, she could barely concentrate on anything else - boy was her mind's eye graphic about everything she was curious about!

The same way you are, just thinking. Warren replied to her thought via his own.

If this was the first glimpse of what it felt like to have your own fledgeling inside your head along with you, it wasn't all that bad. Now he'd experienced his first communication with Karou; it became clear that his connection with Ellis was nowhere near as strong. Warren quickly put that down to the fact that Ellis hadn't been there for him when he first woke up from being sired and only initiated a connection with him as his Sire later.

Little did he know that he and Karou already had a closeness that outweighed his attachment to Ellis tenfold, and the closeness they would develop over time would be one that was rare amongst Sire's and fledgelings throughout the world and history.

The next layer of sensation that came across their telepathic link was one that he'd experienced himself, something he knew by the look of her eyes he would have to fix soon. First, he had to explain why he was about to give her blood, that was if she hadn't already figured everything out. As Warren had suspected, Karou had figured out by now what had taken place, but she needed to hear him say it.

"You still haven't told me what happened?" Karou asked. Her tone was impatient because she slowly became unable to ignore the burning in her throat and the pit of her stomach.

"When it came down to it, I couldn't let you die." Warren was about to go into a complete explanation, but he clocked the look on her face - she was getting close to starting to scratch her skin, and that meant the pain that came with the finalisation of her transformation was coming. Soon she would be ravenous, her body would have burned through the blood he had fed her to change her by now. Karou needed a fresh feed and a large one if he stood a chance at getting her through the first stages as smoothly as possible.

"Why? What's happening?" Karou asked again, frustrated and confused by how alien her body felt. She fought back the urge to claw her fingernails down her neck, arms, chest, and stomach. I'm on fire!

"I sired you. You're not mortal anymore. You need to feed." For now, they were the three pieces of information she needed to know to abide by what he was about to do. Warren climbed over the back of the couch, in a movement that Karou could still appreciate as fast, but now within her capabilities. She watched him flit into his office and return with not three but six blood bags.

Quickly the puzzle that had her confused earlier was unravelling. How looking at the thick red liquid made her feel, along with her impeccable vision, keen sense of smell, sore throat, and excruciating body aches confirmed that Warren hadn't lied. Sudden, sharp pain in her mouth stunned Karou; her brand new fangs bared for the first time.

Warren hopped back over the couch and sat cross-legged before her. His attention was back on Karou's face just in time to catch the moment her fangs bared themselves. The look on her face was priceless. "Cold will have to do just this once."

"Mhmm," Karou replied briefly. All she wanted was to feed now and think about it later. With her new fangs bare, she panted impatiently and gnawed at her lips.

The impatient whining, the biting of her lips, and the way her fingers inched nearer to him was utterly, sinfully distracting. On autopilot, he passed Karou her first vampiric meal. It was almost impolite how Karou snatched the bag away from him, but he understood her urgency. At least she wasn't fighting to get at his neck.

God, that's so hot. His mind was no longer a safe haven, and Warren's unbridled thought slipped right into Karou's mind. Embarrassed, he cleared his throat and looked off to the side, but he couldn't keep his eyes away for long.

Karou sent the tube into her mouth and sucked up the contents - her immortal life depended on it. The thought that it might've been a gross substance to drink never crossed her mind; it was appetising and looked as thirst quenched as a tall, fizzing glass of pink lemonade in the middle of sweltering July.

When Warren's stray and revealing thought entered her head, she sought for his eyes but he wouldn't meet them. When he finally gave in and looked at her, she retracted the tube from her mouth a little; her lips hung open to display her lower teeth coated in blood, and her eyes that were getting gradually lighter stared at him from under her lashes; she smirked in a way that made him swallow hard.

Taking the empty plastic package from her, Warren passed her the next one, and without looking away from one another, Karou began to drink that down too; her tongue distractedly felt over her sharp fangs.

I wonder what kissing will be like now... Hmm, or what sex would be like... Karou thought; she hadn't computed that he could probably hear what she was used to being private ponderings.

"Karou! I heard that." Warren wasn't chastising her; it was just alarming having so much access to her thoughts. For someone seemingly innocent, she was remarkably free of mind.

"Heard what?" She asked innocently, holding out her hand for the next part of her meal. Her eyes were now on the edge of blue.

"Your thought about… Sex." Warren answered, passing her what she wanted and taking the empty one away, facilitating as always.

"You can hear everything?"

"At least until you get used to keeping things to yourself, yes. You should put sex from your mind, though; it'll be a while before you're able to do that again. Arousal brings on thirst when you're a fledgeling, and draining your bed-mate is a bit of a mood killer."

"You said 'again'..."

"Hmm?" Warren didn't seem to understand her comment.

"You said it'd be a while 'til I'm able to do that again, like I've done it before?" Karou had quickly finished her third blood bag, and Warren passed her her fourth without so much as flinching. "I've never done it before. I thought you knew that."

What she so calmly admitted caused whatever colour lingered under his skin to drain. "I...- I tried not to think about you like that."

"Why would you think about me like that?" Karou shrugged her shoulder. "But... Sometimes I thought you were thinking about it. Like when we kissed or when you'd let me sleep in your bed, and you'd hold me, or when you..." Karou suddenly realised she could remember the events that led up to her Siring. Of course, she had time missing from when she lost consciousness, but how he'd pinned her to the couch and how his body had pressed into hers and held her down was so vivid. As she thought about it, Warren could see it in his mind's eye and almost feel it from her perspective. "When you pinned me down, your body was at least thinking about it a little bit..."

You're going to be hard to keep secrets from. Warren thought to prove his point. "I can't help it... You don't have to take it personally. I don't want to offend you."

Karou set down the fourth empty blood bag and refused another; she felt full. If she drank anymore, she would've been sick, she felt. "I'm not offended. It's flattering, I think. But trust me, I know it's not personal. You're out of my league anyway." Awkwardly she touched her fangs, unsure what to do with them now. "How do you do it when you get them to go back?" Karou gestured to her fangs again. It was strange that they were now a part of her body.

Warren sat up a little straighter and leaned closer. He had no idea how to react to what she said, but he knew one thing for sure, it would do her no favours to tell her she was wrong about it not being personal. Her theories about their being in vastly different social classes baffled him; he'd never considered that an obstacle like his other reasons for wanting to abstain from defiling her, such as his age and disposition.

Taking her hands in his, he was about to show her something, but she flinched away. "What?"

"You're not cold anymore. I- I thought I'd imagined it earlier..."

"I'm not not cold; you're just the same temperature as me now."

"I won't get cold like I used to then?"

"No, that's right, you won't feel the cold."

"That's awesome. I've always loved fall and sweaters, but I hate coats."

How she managed to find a silver lining to one of the most alienating things that he hated about his vampirism made him smile.

Now that Karou had fed, she felt a little better, but everything still ached. She fidgeted as if she couldn't get comfortable. "Warren, everything hurts."

"Alright, I think it's time for bed then. You don't need to sleep per se, but you need the rest." Warren stood up from the couch and waited to see if she could walk. She was unsteady enough on her feet to cause him to reach out and scoop her up into his arms. Once she was there and holding on, he carried her towards his bedroom.

Karou had always felt safe around Warren, but now she could sense even more that she didn't ever need to doubt her security. She had become an extension of him, a part of his self, and he'd protect her as such.

As he carried her, she considered the side of his face once more and, in her mind, was babbling to herself, evaluating him like a fine painting.

"Again, thank you, but I can hear everything you're thinking, Karou." He said as he set her down onto the mattress. Her evaluation of his features enflamed his vanity, and if he had been the blushing kind, he would have. Feeling humbled and a little bashful, Warren couldn't look at Karou directly again. Before his nightstand, he was collecting two pills from the orange bottles he kept in the drawer and offered them to her along with what remained of a glass of water. "This is just to help you sleep through the rest of the discomfort."

"I don't mean for you to hear it all... but you already knew I thought that you were handsome." Karou threw back the pills and the water and then obediently lay down. Curled up on her side, she looked up at him, hoping he'd stay.

"You might as well know that I had no intention of Siring you, Karou, but I wanted to touch you and bite you so badly that I couldn't help myself," Warren revealed when he sat down on the edge of the bed. For now, he faced away from her, hunched over his knees. "I think you know that you seduced me into doing it, though, don't you? That was a huge risk on your part. Luckily, I-... I couldn't let you die, that would've been such a waste."

Karou appreciated how open he was being; for once; he was letting her in, however briefly. She supposed he would have to now, she was his fledgeling, after all. That was a change she'd have to get used to too. She had no idea what it really meant and what kind of relationship it entailed. She wanted to comfort him, though, because she knew she'd tricked him into doing it; he was right about that. Kneeling up behind Warren, she wrapped her dainty arms about his shoulders and rested her forehead between his shoulder blades. "Thank you for doing it." She whispered into his sweater. "Once I've got the hang of this, maybe you can send me somewhere - away from you and out of your hair? You know you can trust me not to tell anyone about this place."

Warren's possessive side instantly reared its ugly head with a ferocity he'd never experienced it possess before. "No." He snapped. He heard the word before he could stop himself from saying it. Taken aback, Warren grabbed hold of one of her hands as she hugged him and tried to reign himself in. "We can talk about this some other time. For now, you should rest."

"Okay…" Karou knew she might've said something wrong, so she let go of him and shuffled back down into his bedsheets. "Night, Warren."

"Goodnight, Karou."

Warren made his way out into the lounge, where he tidied up the aftermath of Karou's first feed in an attempt to keep his mind busy so that he didn't have the chance to think himself into a bad place.

Eventually, he resigned to the couch and called Magnus back. The Spaniard answered almost immediately like he'd been waiting by the phone.

"Warren, I'm glad you called back."

"She woke up. She's... fine. I've fed her and put her back to bed with a sedative. Hopefully, she'll sleep through the painful part."

"Ah-uh, and there you were, worried that you wouldn't know how to look after a fledgeling vampire." Magnus' tone was warm; Warren could almost tell he was grinning. "You'll do fine. Just be patient with yourself and with Karou. I've been thinking, though, how are you going to train her to restrain herself? You don't have an abundance of mortals at your disposal, and I doubt you're going to let her loose around the Compound to wreak havoc?"

"No, I don't think she'll be able to leave the unit for a few months. On a positive note, she drank the blood I gave her just now calmly enough. She has seen me do it before, so maybe that's why? She knows I'm not going to run out of blood to give her, so she's not frantic about getting it into her as quickly as possible. The issue of teaching her restraint has crossed my mind though, it's a concern for sure. I wish I could bring her to Blue Ash; that would be so much easier..."

"We haven't had any fledgelings around here for a little while; you know how Roman can get about new shiny things... I think it's best you keep her to yourself for now. Perhaps you'll have to teach her on yourself?"

"I'm not a crash test dummy Magnus. What if she can't stop? What if I can't stop her? Fledgeling strength is no joke. What if she drains me? Then she's stuck here on her own."

"You have all the time in the world. Take things slowly. I have every faith that you'll be fine." These were the last words of comfort Magnus managed to give because he heard a cry of discomfort in the background. They both heard it; it was Karou. Although she was out cold to protect her from the worst of the pain she was about to experience; it had started. Now her body would discard any remnants of her mortality, and her transformation would be complete.

"I have to go." Warren ended the call and was back in his bedroom promptly.

The least he could do was watch over her. He would have hated for anything to go wrong now that she'd come this far. It wouldn't be pleasant to watch because he was helpless to do anything to alleviate the pain.

On the bed, Karou's face contorted, and her body laid there stiff as if she was fighting back a horrific and vivid dream. For now, she just groaned every so often. Despite Karou's obvious discomfort, Warren was confident that she wouldn't gain consciousness for a few hours. He hoped that'd be long enough to get her through the worst and that she wouldn't remember it afterwards. Taking up a seat on his piano stool, he faced the bed, and his second vigil began.

Through the wee hours, Warren watched as Karou's limbs strained against the mattress, her skin pulled tight like her muscles might tear through. She writhed uncontrollably through the worst, and by now, she'd kicked her legs free of the bedclothes. After the long moments of tension passed, she'd relax, but not long enough for her body to rest. The transformation was relentless and unforgiving - the Sanguinian virus meant to destroy her mortal form before it remoulded and made her into its perfect host. Why she had wanted this change he couldn't understand.

Karou's chest continuously moved; her breathing was as feverish as her complexion. She heaved and panted like a rabid animal as she sweat her mortality away through her pours. It left a thick glossy sheen over her skin that smelled divinely sweet and soaked into the fine cotton of her nightclothes. They clung to her petite form, revealing to Warren every curve of her naked body; he fought to keep his mind undistracted by this as he watched her. He just needed to make sure nothing ill befell her; now wasn't the time to be fantasising. Besides, he didn't know how much of his mind she had access to in her sedated state.

Since she felt like a part of himself now, the pull towards her was so much harder to ignore. The urge to touch her, to discover her, felt like he had an itch on his body that he couldn't quite reach. Now that Warren had been inside Karou's head, too, it'd become clear that her physical attraction to him ran deeper than he'd thought; it wasn't just the charms his vampirism exuded that lured her. As unfathomable as it was to him, there were obscure things about his personality that she genuinely liked. Perhaps he should've asked Magnus if it would always be this way. Maybe the intensity would fade?

Five hours passed since he'd put Karou to bed. Warren held his head in his hands, resting his elbows onto his knees. Still sat on his piano stool, he stared at the floor between his bare feet. He was tired and could feel himself drifting.

The outbursts of short and pained screams had quieted down to restless groans and whines. All the painful noises Karou made were awful, but every so often, one would sound as if it came from a place of pleasure. It was jarring, and it caused Warren to focus on her face each time. Sure enough, sometimes, there would almost be a smile present on her lips.

Just like a shoreline bore the brunt of a sea storm, Karou had been thrashed by atrong tides of agony, but the waves had finally settled and lulled her into peace again.

Soon enough, Karou was quiet, her breathing had almost ceased and she looked peaceful. As if waking from a pleasant dream, her eyes began to flutter; the sedative had worn off just in time for her to wake up naturally. When she did, he'd be there, waiting.

Her black eyes blinked open into the bedroom, and she saw that dawn had come. Warren had left one window blind open to let in a slither of winter daylight; it lit his form from the side as he sat at his piano. Curled up on her side, she met his eyes and smiled at him sleepily.

"Why do I still feel so tired?" Karou asked, turning her face to yawn into the pillow beneath it. That was when she noticed it was wet, and so was her hair. Actually, she was damp all over. "Ew, is that sweat?" She asked, scraping her face away from her cheek with a disgusted expression. When she looked back at Warren, she was embarrassed.

"You haven't actually been sleeping. I just sedated you to get you through the most painful part. After your first feed, the virus really kicks up the ante to uh- 'cleanse your system' of anything left that's mortal or uninfected, depending on how you look at it. And yes, that's sweat, but it's alright. Wait here..." Now they were out of the woods; Warren left the bedroom to get Karou some more sustenance; her eyes were the giveaway that she was thirsty again, though it was to be expected.

Her body had just been through the wringer, and boy did she know about it. Nowhere hurt anymore, but she felt utterly exhausted.

Warren arrived back in the bedroom with another batch of blood bags, but they were pleasantly warm to the touch this time. Sat on the edge of the bed again, Warren opened the first and offered it to her. Karou had already sat up in anticipation and shuffled over to be closer to him. Now she was a little clearer of mind; the idea that what she was about to drink had come from a person grossed her out a bit, but as soon as Warren presented her with an open package, the scent of the warm blood inside was more than enough to blot that thought out entirely. Her fangs had sprung down into place against her bottom lip, and as she sipped down her meal, they peeped out of the little smile she wore. It was rather cute, Warren thought - Karou must've heard his evaluation and giggled.

Leaving Karou to her meal, Warren went into the little closet bedroom to look for some fresh clothes for her to change into. Since she'd packed all her belongings away, the only things she'd left out was a change of clothes for the day of her planned execution; today, her twentieth birthday. She couldn't wear jeans and a sweater to bed, so he gathered her underwear and thought on his feet about what else she could put on. She wouldn't be going out anytime soon; she might not even leave bed that day, he figured. Holding onto her underwear was strange, but he pushed his awkwardness aside and made his way back into the master bedroom. From his dresser, he pulled out one of his t-shirts.

By now, Karou had finished her feed and sat looking at him with deep blue eyes. She wasn't completely satisfied, but it was notoriously difficult to fill such a newborn vampire; the thirst was ceaseless. She was astonishingly calm and twirled her finger at Warren, requesting him to turn around while she changed.

"I'm done." She said, permitting Warren to look at her again. His t-shirt was comically too large, but she didn't seem to mind.

"Sit here; I'm going to change the bed linen for you." Warren requested, gesturing to his piano stool. Karou complied but watched his every move from her perch. Now that she saw the world in high definition; she could easily pick up on minor details; like the lacelike pattern of scars on his neck, they stood out to her. The two days' growth on his chin was still there and still suited him more than he knew. His skin tone had a sun-kissed glow to it and scattered sparingly over the canvas were freckles, at least down his forearms, which she could see since he'd pushed up the sleeves of the thin beige sweater. It didn't take him any time to strip the bed of its sheets, and now he was redressing the mattress. She sat shamelessly, ogling his arms and hands again. The flat sheet wafted into the air as his arms spanned wide, spreading the sheet over the bed. Karou watched how Warren's fingers gripped the fabric, how his wrists flexed and how that made the tendons and muscles shift under the taut skin of his forearms.

"You can come lay back down now," Warren said.

In her state of concentration, Karou heard the nuances of Warren's voices timbre in a way she never had before, how the rich twang of an almost forgotten Southern accent tainted his words.

"Fresh bedding is the best!" Karou exclaimed as she crawled her way under the sheets and laid spread eagle. "Mmm, don't you think?" Clutching the fresh quilt, she curled up tight suddenly, nuzzling into the fabric.

"I have to agree." Warren actually smiled at her and tossed the pillows her way. "Happy birthday, by the way."

Karou smiled back, snuggled down into the fresh linen, and peacefully dropped off back to sleep. Warren closed the blinds the rest of the way to cloak the room in darkness and left her to sleep.