'Alright, where are we?'

Hello and welcome to me. And I mean that literally now. I'm more of a place than a person now that I've become a dungeon.

...Or am I a thing?

Whatever.

Hmm. The 10th floor is inactive, this means that no one made it this far. That's good, without mana I wouldn't be able to fight anyone aiming for my core. 9th floor is also inactive. Geez, I hope they at least made it to the 6th floor... Aaaand the 6th floor is inactive. Shesh, I know I made myself pretty OP but they had centuries to try and conquer me.

...Are you kidding me?

Looking at all the other floors, I see that all of them are inactive (except the first one of course).

Focusing on the first floor I see an unexpected sight. I see what appears to be a noble taking his anger out on my skeletons.

He seems to be running back and forth through my first floor killing my skeletons almost as soon as they re-spawn. It also looks like he brought some guards, but they seem to be here to keep an eye on him rather than for protection. 3 of the guards are in the first room turning away anyone that wants to enter. 4 are enjoying themselves at my bar in the last room.

'Oh, seems like he has a visitor.'

After watching the noble for about an hour, I got bored and was paying more attention to the guards conversations. The 3 guards in the fist room have let a female adventurer pass without any questions. When she reached the 5th room she saw him fighting my skeletons.

Once the noble sees the female adventurer, most of his anger disappeared. He finished off the last skeleton in the room and approached her with his arms spread wide as if expecting a hug. As he approached, the female adventurer wore a charming smile. Upon reaching her, the noble got sucker punched.

'Did not see that coming.'

[noble] Rubs his check that was hit. "What was that for, Emma?"

Emma doesn't say anything, she just turns around and stomps towards my exit. Some of the skeletons in those rooms have re-spawned but I control them so they don't attack her.

[noble] "Darling, what's wrong?"

The noble chases after Emma. As they continue back towards my entrance I keep all the re-spawned skeletons from attacking. The noble apologizes to Emma while trying to ask her what he did wrong. When she reaches the first room that has the 3 guards guarding the entrance, she stops and turns to face him.

[Emma] "You want to know what's wrong!? I spent three weeks away from home. Three! Do you want to know what happened during those three week!? During those three weeks my fiancé forgot to call me like he promised. And when I tried to call him he just refused my calls. When he finally returned my messages, it was with a single message that simply read 'Busy'.

"Now, my fiancé is a busy man so I thought that he must have some important business that didn't involve me. So I spent my time going about my regular business when I hear from a stranger. A STRANGER. That my fiancé's mom, the queen, is sick. When I hear this, I finally realize that this is the important business that my fiancé must be occupied with. Because obviously this has nothing to do with me. I mean I was only going to marry into his family. My MISTAKE."

When she finishes, she has tears running down her face. She then takes the ring off her finger, throws it at his face, and stomps away. The guards and onlookers of adventurers smartly getting out of the way.

After she stomps away all the onlookers and guards exit my view area. They probably decided to stand at the outside of my entrance to give the prince some alone time.

[prince] "Bu-but. Wha-whe-h-h-how?"

Oh my. Seems the sudden news has caused the prince to go into a shocked state. Seeing this as an opportunity, I have 2 of my skeletons approach him, each place a hand on his shoulders, and lead him to my back room.

Of course I'm not going to try to kill him. He's probably at such a high level tha-...

...I'm an idiot.

I use my magic to identify the prince.

'Oooh, level 237. Hmm? His name's Tyrone? Normally I think of a black person when I think Tyrone. Oh well.'

(AN: Due to magic allowing people to not only change their races but also skin color and gender, there is no such thing as a foreign name. But I will still default to names that I find easier to read/remember.)

At level 237 my skeletons probably can't do any damage to him. Anyways, as I was saying, killing him does me no good. The main reason dungeons kill is to gain EXP. The higher the dungeon's level the more floors they can make. The more floors the stronger the monsters. The stronger the monsters the safer the core will feel.

But I feel pretty safe at the moment considering that after hundreds of years no one has reached my second floor. So instead of trying to get EXP my goal for now is to increase my mana income. That's why I'm bringing Tyrone to the last room on my first floor. To drown his sorrows in beer.

[Tyrone] "N-n-no. I-i-i I'm s-s-sorry. D-d-don't leave m-m-." Doesn't even finish his sentence just breaks down crying.

'Looks like I need my skeletons to pick up the pace.'

I have the skeletons that have been carrying him until now pass him over to the skeletons in the current room. The skeletons in this room are stronger and can move faster.

Just like all of my floors, my first floor is special. I have the first half of the floor set up like a normal dungeon. It has a path that goes through some rooms with skeletons in them. At first the skeletons don't have any weapons, but as you get further there are rooms with more skeletons and skeletons with a variety of weapons.

The second half however, is an entire room. This room has lots of special features. At the back of the room is a raised platform used for night activities. Located on the right and left sides are long bars that stretch for most of the room and have skeletons working behind them as bar keeps. I designed it so that if someone wants to, they can order a beer. But because I'm a dungeon I will only accept their mana as payment. Of course, they have to give me 10% more mana than it costs me to make.

I get my skeletons to seat Tyrone at the bar on the left. I chose the left one because the other guards are at the right one. Thankfully they seem to be too busy with their conversation to notice my skeletons dragging the prince to the bar. It also helps that Tyrone's wearing leather and not metal armor.

Once he's seated I have the skeletons that dragged him here leave before they're noticed. Then I have the skeleton bar tender put Tyrone's hand on a mana stone embedded in the bar. Once the mana's drained the bar tender hands him his drink.

Tyrone takes the drink but is so out of it I'm not sure he even knows he has it in his hands. After 3 minutes, with the only noise being the other guards, Tyrone blinks in surprise as he sees his drink. Then with a look of resolution, he chugs the whole thing in one go.

[Tyrone] Slams the mug on the bar. "What kind of a person am I!?" Then orders another.

'Whoa, either he's really emotional right now or he's a light drinker. This is nothing like the guy who was killing my skeletons.'

[Tyrone] "She's right. I don't diverse anyone."

By now the guards at the other bar have noticed Tyrone and have come over to see what's happened.

[guard A] "My lord, what's wrong?"

[Tyrone] "I'm what's wrong." Chugs the rest of his beer and orders another.

[guard B] "Was there news of your mother?"

[Tyrone] "No! I forgot to inform her."

[guard B] "Her who?"

[Tyrone] "My fi-fi-" Breaks down crying again.

The 4 guards look at each other and sigh knowing that it's pointless to ask any further. They send one of their own to the front group to let them know the prince's current state.

After about an hour, the guards had managed to convince/drag Tyrone out of me.

It appears that today's commotion has scared the other adventurers away because no one entered me for the rest of the day.

'What a fun first day back. Wonder what tomorrow will bring.'