《Spirit Exorcists》Chapter 8: Look Forward
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Daiyu watched from her car with a disappointed look on her face. Her elderly companion, Charles, was absolutely horrified.
“Fuck!” Daiyu spat as she massaged her temple.
“Why aren’t you going in ma’am? Forgive me for being so direct, but we should have interfered when civilians were involved!” Charles raised his voice.
“You saw didn’t you? The spiritual energy rising within him. I thought this was it… I thought he would be able to save them…” Daiyu glanced at the scene, Mark was still kneeling on the ground, devastated.
“Ma’am, shouldn’t you go in to assist them then? What about the casualties?” Charles asked.
Daiyu paused for a moment. Her eyes carefully analysed the scene.
“Ozai’s spiritual energy is low, he’d need more time to get back in the action.. The casualties…” Daiyu was interrupted by something, a wave of spiritual energy flooded the scene and concentrated around Mark. Her eyes lit up.
“Did you see that?” Daiyu asked Charles, whose face was equally surprised.
“I see… I thought Mark’s spiritual energy was activated based on his desire to save others and not lose anyone. But I miscalculated…This energy, it’s more malicious than that… this is a darker emotion… It’s hatred…” Daiyu noted.
“Hatred? For who?” Charles questioned, he could sense it too.
“This is my guess… But I think I get it now… the person Mark hates the most…is himself.” Daiyu smirked.
…
Mark screamed as he felt a surge of energy envelop his body. His eyes now focused on the crow.
Why am I so useless? I couldn’t do anything! I couldn’t save anyone! I should have been better… I could’ve been stronger. I need to be stronger… If only I was someone else… If only I was a different person… Fuck!
Mark felt a burning desire within him.
I wish I could just burn away…
This feeling of self-hatred was eating away at him. His anger and hatred was directed at himself and it consumed him. He could feel himself getting overwhelmed by it. His surroundings blurred as he glared at the crow. His overwhelming emotions were manifesting something within him. He could feel something feeding away at his inner turmoil.
Ah… there you are…
Mark understood now, this was what Daiyu meant. The essence of his contract. He wanted to sacrifice himself not because he wanted to save others, but because he hated his very existence that was too weak to do anything.
“I can help you with that… to become stronger…” A familiar voice reverberated in his mind as he felt his body burn.
Mark clenched his chest, the feelings he had bottled up till now rising in his gut, his helplessness, grief, fear, hatred, all coming out.
“[Lend me your strength, Ruby, let’s end this.]” Mark spoke with authority as he submitted to his emotions.
The air around him vibrated as energy surrounded his body, layers of cloth materialised and started to weave around his body, wrapping him in a tight layer of cloth. Mark began to look like the mummified version of the spirit he had fought in the car park. The fabric reached up to his neck, creeping up to his face, but leaving it largely untouched. Loose strands of fabric extended out from his back and arms, floating and moving like they were extra limbs.
“[Soul Weave]” Mark’s voice boomed as he leaped into the air, the fabric now completely covering his lower body as well.
The loose strips of fabric extended out from his arm and weaved together to form a blade-like tendril. Mark stabbed the crow multiple times with his right hand, which was now essentially a blade.
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With his left hand, covered in bandages, Mark continued to pummel the crow, till it began to descend. The crow screeched as it fell, landing on the ground with a thud. Mark continued to furiously punch and stab the crow with his hands and make-shift blade.
“WHYYY? ALL I WanTEd Was YOur AffECTion! Why DoeSN’t AnyONE LOvE Me??” The crow screamed in a distorted mash-up of voices. Mark was thrown off by that, pausing for a moment, giving the crow enough time to yank Mark off itself.
Mark fell to the ground, his bandage tendrils supporting his fall. The crow spirit began to fly away, its injuries causing it to hop on the ground occasionally. Mark wasn’t letting it get away so easily.
Mark chased after it, the layers of bandages wrapping his body hardening and acting like springs as he leaped and dashed after the crow. The crow turned back and launched a barrage of daggers back at Mark. Mark could sense it. He could see the individual daggers before they left the spirit’s wings. It was like before, slow motion.
Mark felt the energy in each blade as it zoomed past him. Mark twisted his body, managing to dodge some while others he used his bandage tendrils to deflect. Mark zeroed in on the crow.
Your’e mine.
He felt a flow in his movements. It was unlike anything he’s felt before. His thoughts, the cloth-like tendrils, they all moved in sync, like it was natural to him. Mark burst forward, the air whizzing past his face, brushing against his wavy hair. He felt like he was back in track, running like the wind.
The crow suddenly made a sharp turn, this time aiming for Ozai, who was still kneeling down, regaining his energy. The crow launched a longer, thicker blade at him. Mark sensed the crow’s movement, turning as well, aiming to cut in front of the trajectory of the blade. Mark’s body blurred as he whizzed towards the blade, he had never moved this fast in his life. The pieces of cloth wrapping tightly around his body, it was almost suffocating, but like a g-suit, it kept his body together and it made Mark able to outrun the blade.
Mark jumped in front of it, but he was too close. Mark instinctively reached out to grab the blade, clapping his hands on the flat sides, attempting to stop the blade in its path. His hands burned as he clamped down on the blade’s flat sides, in a swift motion he spun around and redirected the back at the crow, using the blade’s initial momentum to his advantage. The crow however, easily deflected it with its wings.
Mark flinched as he felt a sharp pain on his hands. He glanced down and realised his hands were bleeding. The cloth that had once wrapped his hand was gone.
“You’re going to pay for that…” Mark spoke as he advanced towards the crow. Mark raised one of his cloth tendrils jutting from his back, making it form a blade.
“You’re not going to hurt me… are you?” A familiar voice spoke to Mark from the crows mouth.
Mark stopped in his tracks. The voice belonged to Ruby.
“....Please… stop this…” The voice coming out of the crow’s human mouth was that of Ruby’s and soon, in Mark’s vision, the silhouette of a giant menacing crow was replaced with that of a teen girl.
What’s this?
Ruby appeared before him. She was still in her school uniform. She reached her slender arms out, extending her hand to him.
“Come with me… you don’t have to fight alone anymore… I’m right here…” Ruby said to Mark in a calming voice.
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“Ruby?” Mark asked, slightly dazed.
Ozai stood to his feet again, slightly confused at what Mark was saying and why Mark was walking toward the crow with his guard down. The crow stood there, its mouth open wide, the lower jaw extending and stretching to the ground. It looked as if it was inviting Mark in. And Mark looked as if he was willingly walking to his death.
Ozai wished he could scream, he needed to do something.
His nose was still bleeding from his use of Omukade but he had to do it once more.
Ozai clapped his hands, trying to draw from whatever reserve of spiritual energy sources he had. Perhaps, maybe, he could push for one more summon.
…
Daiyu monitored the situation closely.
“Impressive, Mark has surprisingly adapted really well to his spirit contract… but…” Daiyu’s voice trailed off.
“But? Why is Mark simply walking towards the crow?” Charles asked.
“Well, for some spirits, when they feel cornered, they unleash a final move, risking all their spiritual energy in the hopes of it killing off its enemies. A precursor of such moves sometimes involves putting the opponent into trance like states and inducing visions. This being a heartbreak-based spirit, I’m sure it’s giving Mark a vision. Possibly, he’s seeing someone he cares about… Though, if he had more spiritual energy left, he’d be able to see through it… But I have a feeling both of our trainees are starting to run out…” Daiyu watched, occasionally glancing over at the two casualties and then over to Ozai.
“Hmm… Charles, get ready… I think this battle will wrap up soon. Call in some backup and an emergency team. We need to go in fast if we hope to save those casualties…” Daiyu spoke as she got out of the car.
…
“Let’s go… shall we?” Ruby said to Mark, her arms now spread open wide, inviting Mark into her embrace.
Mark slowly dragged his feet across the ground. Maybe this was all a dream…
Maybe I didn’t have to fight after all. Yeah… I must be dreaming… Ruby’s not dead… She’s right in front of me.
If Mark took another step forward, he’d be in her arms. Her pale arms that never saw the light of day.
Wait…
Mark realised this was the first time he had seen Ruby’s arms. And this was the first time she was simply wearing a uniform. She always wore a sweater to cover her arms.
Mark took a step back. His anger building up inside him.
“You’re not Ruby…” the moment Mark realised it, his vision returned back to normal, and in front of him was the crow, its human mouth had stretched and distorted into a large monstrous mouth that was as big as Mark. Mark could see the void inside the spirit’s mouth, like the one he saw in the carpark.
“ARHHHH” The spirit yelled as it jerked forward, snapping its jaws shut. Mark jumped back, just barely missing the bite of the crow.
The crow yelled and extended its wings, they too began to distort, stretching and cracking as the spirit extended its wings further and further. The shape of its wings morphed, becoming closer to human hands instead. Mark found himself surrounded by the crow’s ‘hands’.
The crow screeched and was about to close its hands and squash Mark. Like giant walls on booths sides, they closed in on Mark at a terrifyingly fast pace.
But then the ground started to rumble again, and a centipede burst out of the ground beneath the spirit. Piercing the spirit’s feet and body with its pincers.
Mark glanced over to Ozai, who was standing there panting, blood trickling down from his blindfold and nose. He had the centipede hand-sign up. Ozai smiled even as blood trickled down his scarred mouth.
“I got you.” Ozai mouthed as he maintained the hand-sign.
Mark smiled.
Ah, that’s right. I’m not fighting alone anymore. That’s one more thing this spirit got wrong.
“[Soul Weave]” As Mark uttered those words, he felt as if his soul was being sucked. The fabric rematerialised around his fists once again, wrapping it tightly. Mark felt blood trickle down his nose.
So this is what Ozai has to go through… I can’t believe it… This feeling seriously sucks… It’s amazing he could still pull off another summon…
“But… that just means I have to go through with this now…” Mark’s voice was laced with fierceness as his cloth tendrils wrapped around his hands, forming the shape of a sharp blade. They hardened on Mark’s command.
The crow was pinned to the ground by the centipede, its large hands waving about, its ugly voice screeching away helplessly.
“Ahhh… just shut up already.” Mark’s cold tone was paired with his cold piercing eyes. Mark dashed forward with no hesitation.
The crow’s hands tried to reach Mark, swiping at him, even from the pinned position. But Mark was faster, he jumped over the hands easily, transitioning to a dash as soon as he hit the ground.
He was going in for the kill.
The crow threw its other hand at Mark, but Mark simply leaped and landed on top of the crow’s long distorted hands. Mark began running straight for the crows head. He could feel energy building up in his blades.
“Eat this, crow!” Mark yelled as he jumped off the crow’s arms, his blade-arms aimed straight for the crow spirit’s neck. In a flash, Mark pierced the crow spirit’s neck and sliced straight through.
The instant Mark’s blades sliced the crow spirit’s neck off, flashes of images flooded Mark’s and Ozai’s minds. Mark and Ozai felt it all at once as images of rejection and heartbreak entered their minds. They could feel the loss, the grief and the heavy emotions that came with unfulfilled love.
“I… just wanted… to be accepted.. To be loved…” The spirit muttered before completely fading away.
With that, the barrier fell down.
And so did Mark and Ozai.
Mark laid there dazed, the only thing he heard before passing out was the muffled calls of Daiyu.
…
Daiyu watched as the emergency team loaded the two casualties on the stretcher and into the ambulance.
“Mark and Ozai just woke up and aside from some minor injuries, they just need to rest and replenish their spiritual energy. As for the couple… The medical team says they’re both alive but in critical condition… The most surprising detail was that they sustained absolutely no soul corruption…” Charle’s voice trailed off.
“Tell me Daiyu.. How’s that possible? How did two civilians enter the barrier? I was a hundred percent sure we cleared the area. Also, no soul corruption? Civilians entering a barrier and not having any traces of soul corruption even after getting impaled by a spirit’s attacks aren’t possible unless… an exorcist intervened…And the only exorcist who could determine the barrier’s conditions for entry and also imbue the couple with some spiritual energy to fend off corruption… was you…” Charles said with a heavy tone.
“Making accusations?” Daiyu glanced back at Charles.
“I’ll say this… Mark only managed to visualise and apply his contract to this extent because of the involvement of civilians. If this allows us to create stronger exorcists, then by all means… I’ll injure a civilian or two.” Daiyu’s tone was harsh as she looked Charles in the eye.
“I know I’m just an assistant, but surely you can see the wrong in using civilian lives like that… just for training? We were tasked to protect them…” Charles was in utter shock and disbelief.
“Yes! I do see the wrong in that! But…” Charles was cut off swiftly by Daiyu
“An exorcist cannot be told how to manifest their abilities. It limits them! They have to uncover it on their own! We need this if we want the next batch of exorcists to be stronger than before! Did you forget the Nan Ching District Massacre?”
Charles quietened down at the mention of the massacre. He remembered the pain of that event.
“We lost so many trainees that day… So many promising exorcists….” Daiyu’s voice turned solemn as she gazed downwards, not wanting to show Charles the hurt on her face.
“Exorcists sacrifice themselves daily for the everyday folk without anyone caring for their loss… If it means that less exorcists die down the line… I’ll do whatever it takes…” Daiyu glared back at Charles.
…
Mark watched as the ambulance sped off with the casualties in it. Ozai was sitting next to him. They were both on a bench in the park when they gained consciousness. When they awoke, warm towels had already been draped over them and two familiar faces stared at them with relief.
Shen and Khan had arrived on the scene.
“You know… You guys did a pretty good job… don’t let the fact that you allowed civilians to get injured bother you. That’s not on you.” Khan spoke, eyeing Daiyu as he spoke the last sentence.
“Yes… For a bunch of kids… you guys did a satisfactory job… a bit untidy… but we can work on that.” Shen added.
“Untidy? You should take a look at your fight in the carpark man, that’s what I call untidy…” Khan mocked.
“I could have ran towards them… If I didn't hesitate for a second.. I could have reached them…” Mark muttered.
“Hey-” Khan tried to interject but Mark continued.
“I thought just because I made this spirit contract, I thought I had changed… but I’m still the same person. No matter how hard I try… I can’t change who I am… That night… When I stood at the same place Ruby leaped off from, I thought to myself: What if I died too? What if I just jumped off now?
“I’ve been drifting through my whole life… All I could do was just lose the people I cared about…” Mark went on, tears welling up in his eyes.
“You know, when I was part of the track team, I went to buy an expensive shoe for my hurdling competition. My teammates all thought I was getting ahead of myself… But I wanted to prove them wrong… In the end, for that year, I couldn’t even make it to finals.
“How lame is that? Here I am, still doing the same things. I thought if I could at least save a few lives, maybe then my life could mean something. But I still, I’m still that lame kid who buys a fancy shoe but loses in the end.” Mark let out a pained expression of self-loathing, smiling at his pathetic state.
“You know… I don’t think it's lame…” Khan said, leaning against the bench.
“So what if you bought that shoe? It means you wanted to give it your all.
“You see Mark, sometimes it's not about the end result or whether you can win. It's about whether you even tried and whether you can pick yourself up after every failure and tell yourself to look forward. You say you haven’t done anything? Well, you saved Shen didn’t you? So what if you failed here and there. Babies aren’t born knowing how to walk. They fail lots of times. Maybe some learn slower than others, but they don’t give up. They keep going, they look forward and attempt to take that step. Even if they fall, as long as they don’t stop, then they’ll get it one day.
“So don’t stop trying. Even if you fail, even if you lose everything, look forward. Look forward and take that step.” Khan spoke with a level of sincerity that surprised even Shen.
Mark looked up at Khan and Shen. Khan dug into his pocket and handed Mark a set of prayer beads tied with a strong rope. Shen did the same to Ozai.
“These prayer beads are given to all new trainees. If you kids join us we’ll teach you how to use your abilities to help others. Mark, we can teach you how to give Ruby a proper passing… ” Shen said.
Mark looked at the both of them, and then at Ozai, who simply nodded.
Ah… I guess you were right Mr Ang… It’s not about awards… Mom, the wind in my hair, pressing forward to feel that wind… I really wanted to feel that again…
Mark wiped the tears from his eyes. His eyes now showed a sense of assuredness.
“I made a contract… I have to see it through to the end…” Mark said as he looked straight ahead, determination glowing in his eyes.
“I’ll do it. I’ll become an exorcist.” Mark said firmly, gripping the prayer beads in his hands. Ozai nodded in agreement.
“Good to hear, we officially welcome you, Mark and Ozai, members of batch number 3022, to the Spiritual Anomalies Investigation Bureau.” Khan said with a wide grin on his face.
…
Elsewhere
The man awoke from his nap. He stumbled to the washroom and took a look at himself. His bloodshot eyes and dark eye bags irritated him. His frame was thin, his ribcage visible.
I was so close… so close to achieving the perfect vessel. I spent years searching for the best compatibility, I tried so many things, moulded it perfectly for years… and then it-
But then he felt it. Something was calling to him. A power. A familiar power.
The frail man smiled.
“Interesting… very interesting… It seems that this generation of exorcists might prove wayy better than the last… hehehe” the man’s voice croaked as he stood there ominously in the dark room he was in.
I’ll find you soon.
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