《The White Rabbit》Book 2: Chapter 28
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Alex felt himself swooning; he began to float away but clung tenaciously to his body.
“No, darlin,” he said, “I… I don’t reckon.”
The monster turned towards him with its whole body, sat up and sniffed the air again, then made a face, glanced at Billy, then down at its torso. It licked its hands and ran them through its fur, and Alex backed until he hit the wall.
“No, no, it’s ok!” the monster- Xaxac?- said. “It’s ok! No blood! We’re safe! It’s ok!”
It covered the distance between then in one hop, smiled, and licked a stripe from the neckline of Alex’s shirt to his jaw.
“Let me in!” Agalon demanded, “Give me the goddamn key!”
“Aggie!” Xac called happily.
The door rattled and Xaxac hunkered down between Alex and whatever may lay beyond it. Aggie was afraid, and his fear came off of him in pheromones that permeated the air. Xaxac didn’t know what he was afraid of, but he was so big and strong, he was magic, and he should never be afraid. If Agalon was afraid of something the rest of the warren had no chance against it. They would have to run.
He glanced at Alex, and he had not calmed down at all. Alex was even more scared than Agalon was; his fear was so thick Xac could have choked on it. He didn’t think Alex could even run. He would have to carry him.
The door flew open and Agalon froze.
His heart skipped a beat as he stared at Xaxac, then he held a hand up, behind him, and Xaxac saw the others huddled there, in the safety of the doorway. There didn’t seem to be anything out there worth being afraid of.
Agalon slowly moved his eyes instead of his whole head, and Xaxac appreciated it. He didn’t want to make any sudden movements, didn’t want to scare Xac and Alex while they were already so afraid. He was trying to hide his own fear, because he was the alpha buck, and he was trying to take care of them.
“The moons ain’t full,” he said, quietly and with much emphasis, so Xaxac stood on his hind legs and turned his attention to the window.
The moons were important, had always been important to him. He was afraid of the moons. Why had he always been afraid of the moons?
He was afraid of the moons because he was a monster.
Xaxac turned and stared down at his body.
A few tattered rags were still attached, but it was mostly fluffy, blood stained, brown fur.
He was a monster.
He should not know he was a monster.
He never thought during this.
He never remembered this.
His body began to shake and he lowered himself to the ground to claw at it.
“Aggie!” he begged, “Help! Something’s wrong, help me! Help me!”
Agalon gasped and held out a hand toward him.
“Yeah,” Alex laughed, the kind of laugh that held no mirth, that kind that preceded madness, “He talks now. That’s… that’s what we’re doin now. I think Billy’s dead. I’m gonna die tonight. Even after everything, ‘Giant Rabbit’ wouldn’t what I thought would do me in, but here we are.”
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“Stop talking,” Agalon said calmly, “You’re scaring him.” He turned his attention back to Xaxac and continued, “Everythin is alright, Honey Bunny, I’m here. I’m here an I love you, alright?”
“Help me!” Xac begged.
“I’m gonna paralyze you, darlin,” Agalon said, “I ain’t gonna hurt ya, but I gotta do somethin. You’re makin’ people nervous.”
“Help me!”
His muscles seized, and everything began to fall apart as his heart stopped beating. Blood stilled in his veins, oxygen and nutrients could not get to his brain, and the world was fuzzy as he fell onto his side.
“Get my fighter the hell out of here!” Agalon snapped, “Ky, get your pleasure slave! Get Billy patched up, I want to know if he’s alive or dead! Then get everyone the hell out of here! I need to be alone! Just me and him!”
Xaxac knew, once again, that he was going to die.
But this time, he deserved it. If someone was attacked by the person at the top of the grooming order, they usually deserved it.
But he missed his heartbeat.
And he was so tired.
He had to close his eyes for a moment.
The waves lapped at the shore and Xaxac stared at the cup in his hand.
“I saw a little rabbit go hop, hop, hop,” Lapus sang, “I saw his little ears go flop, flop, flop.”
“I saw his little eyes go blink, blink, blink,” Lapus was gone; it was Morgani sitting in the sand who reached over and took the cup from Xaxac, “I saw his little nose go twink, twink, twink.”
“See her coat so soft and furry,” Morgani shimmered out of existence and was replaced by a man Xac had never seen before, but almost recognized. He had the same lean build Xac had himself, but he was wearing a set of robes that Xac did not recognize, and his skin was just a little too light. But he had Xac’s big eyes, though they were amber rather than a true brown, and the sunken cheeks Xaxac was afraid to see on himself, the sunkenness that told him he was getting too skinny.
“See her hop away in a hurry!” the man with his eyes shrieked, turned, and lunged for Xac.
Xac darted awake and clung to Agalon, shoved his face in his chest and tried to catch his breath.
“Aggie, help me!” he begged as Agalon tightened his grip, “I had a bad dream! I’m a monster! You gotta help me!”
“I’m standin up,” Agalon said as he did, “An’ I’m pickin you up.”
Xaxac didn’t know why he was narrating his actions, but he leaned heavily into Agalon and clung to his shirt as he felt the world around him shift, as Agalon swept him off his feet.
“Lee!” Agalon ordered, “Throw that cloak over him!” Xaxac felt the comforting weight of the fabric and released Agalon with one hand to tuck it around himself.
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“Get in there and gather up every hair of that angora,” Agalon ordered, and Xac felt them moving.
Why was there angora? There shouldn’t be angora! Had it really happened? It hadn’t been a dream?
Xaxac felt the temperature change as Agalon marched into the cool autumn night through the fairgrounds, and Xaxac tried to contain the sobs that spilled out of him, that wracked his whole body, but he could not.
“Aggie,” he begged, “Aggie I… I remember it… I remember it this time… I didn’t… didn’t mean nothin… I… I’m a monster. I’m sorry. I can’t… can’t help it… it’s the moons-”
“Moons ain’t full, darlin,” Agalon said, and Xaxac could not read the emotion in his voice. “Hush. Don’t make a scene. Somethin I don’t understand just happened, but we’re… we’re gonna silver linin the shit outta this. It’ll be alright. As long as you got me, it’ll be alright. I ain’t gonna let nothin happen to you. I got you. I love you. Just be real good and do everythin’ I say without question and I’ll make it alright. Be my good little bunny.”
“I’m sorry,” Xac pulled the cloak tighter over his head.
The temperature changed again and he thought they had gone inside another building, and this idea was confirmed as he heard a voice.
“Duke Agalon your grace,” said the unfamiliar voice, “What a delight!”
“Tell the mayor I need to see her,” Agalon said, “About some paperwork for the cage fighters.”
“Yes, sir, of course,” the voice said, and Xaxac heard footsteps moving away.
“It’s gonna be alright,” Agalon said again, and Xaxac was beginning to believe him.
A few long minutes passed before Xac heard someone approaching, then heard the voice again.
“Right this way, sir,” it said, “The Master will receive you in her sitting room.”
“Perfect,” Agalon said, and they began to move again.
“Would you like a glass of tea?” The voice asked.
“Sure,” Agalon said, “I’d take somethin stronger, too, if you wanna offer it. Been a hell of a night.”
“Of course, sir,” the voice said.
Then whoever it belonged to went away, closing the door behind them.
“I’m gonna set you down, darlin,” Agalon said as he did, and Xaxac swayed unsteadily on his feet. He was the kind of bone tired he often was after shifting, and he was starving, but more than any of that he was afraid, and he knew it showed in his eyes. But he trusted Agalon, knew he would protect him. Agalon was right, as long as Xac had him to protect him, he would be safe.
Agalon took the cloak from Xac and fluffed it out, then arranged it properly around him. Xac appreciated this, because under it he was nude except for scraps of fabric and some of the fur that still clung to him, and he wrapped it tightly and huddled inside.
“Just be real good,” Agalon said, “I outrank her. It’s gonna be fine, Honey Bunny. She ain’t had time to hear nothin yet. Everythin’ is gonna be alright.”
Xac nodded.
“Kailu!” a beautiful feminine voice rang out, and Agalon turned to greet the woman who had just entered the room.
A serving boy slipped in behind her with a tray and began to lay out a tea setting on the small table, and Xac took some comfort in the room itself. It reminded him of their sitting room back home. A little familiarity went a long way when he was in such a distressed state with nerves, hunger, and fatigue.
The woman looked familiar too, in a strange way, with her long blond hair, angular face and fancy clothes. He wondered if she and Agalon were related.
“Hey, Esta,” Agalon smiled, “Sorry to drag you away. I know you gotta be busy with the rodeo. I just need you to sign off on a substitution for me real quick. I got a fighter what needs replacin. It’s just been the one round so it ought not be nothin.”
“Ain’t no trouble,” she said and moved toward the table, “Sit down, eat you one a’ these cakes. I reckon I finally found me a decent cook. You know I had a heap a’ trouble with that.”
“I kinda gotta get back to my fighters,” Agalon said, “I had an off-site injury. That’s why I gotta make the substitution.”
“Lordy, some of y’all are always worryin about them humans,” she said as she took one of the cakes for herself, “they’re resilient, honey, they’ll be fine. Here, just give me the form. David!”
A butler appeared in the doorway, and when he spoke, Xac realized he was the person who had been speaking to Agalon.
“Yes, master?”
“Hand me that binder,” Esta said, “The red one, on the shelf.”
“Yes, master,” he said and obeyed her.
Esta scooted her plate back a little to make room, and Dave moved to the writing desk without being asked to retrieve a quill and ink for her.
“Who are you replacin?” She asked Agalon.
“Billy,” Agalon said simply, and Esta opened the binder and stared at it for some time until she seemed to find what she was looking for, dipped the pen in the ink, and made a mark in the book.
“And who are you replacin it with?” She asked.
“Xaxac,” Agalon said.
“Oh lord,” she sighed, “Spell that darlin.”
“Xa-xa-ac,” Agalon said.
Xaxac did not pretend to understand what was happening.
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