School started again, which usually made me irritable because it meant I had to focus my energy in pretending to give a crap. But this time I was actually looking forward to a sure fire way to see Saki every day, or at least I thought it was going to be a sure fire way, until I turned up to the first day of the second semester, and she didn't even bother to come in at all. Great. She was pulling her disappearing act again.

Aside from the first few days she'd missed in the spring, she had been pretty good about going the rest of the semester. Maybe her problem was returning after breaks. Hiromasa had to go help his mom, so I was left to go home by myself, annoyed and grumpy.

"Yo," Saki said, giving me a wave as I opened the door to my room.

She was laying belly down on the rug, kicking her legs in the air lazily, surrounded by various manga titles. A box of sweet corn flavored snack sticks sat to the left of her. She pulled one out and nibbled on it as she flipped the page to the manga she was currently reading.

I suppose it should have surprised me that she was there, but it didn't really. Maybe I was getting used to her random behavior, whatever that meant. I wanted to be mad that she'd ditched class, but I was too happy to see her to hold any real grudge.

I set my bag down by the door and sat near her on the rug, leaning my back against the bed. "Why did you wear your school uniform if you knew you weren't going to go to school?"

She shrugged without taking her eyes from the page. "I thought I was going to go, and then decided this sounded like a lot more fun."

I sighed. "Are you going to go tomorrow?"

"Yes, Mother," she sneered.

"How did you get in here, anyway?" I asked. "I know I locked the door."

"There's a tree in your front yard that lets you climb right up onto that small piece of roof that's directly below your window." She flipped the page, acting like it was the most natural thing in the world to have said.

"So, you broke into my house in broad daylight right in the front yard?"

"Relax. No one was around." She held up the box of snack sticks. "Want one?" She shook it.

I sighed again and took one. "Thanks."

"No Hiromasa today?" She put the box down and took out another stick for herself.

"No. He had to help his mom, so he won't be over today." I munched on my salty snack.

"I see." She snapped a piece of the corn snack off with her teeth.

After a few moments of silence, she shut the book and looked up at me without saying a word.

It is no odd thing for me to stare at her. I did that every day I saw her, but for her to stare wordlessly back at me, and so intently, was something entirely different.

She pulled herself to a sitting position and scooted closer to me. She still hadn't said anything, but she hadn't broken her gaze with me either. Her eyes flittered all around, like she was trying to read something about me, then she brought her face closer. It'd been a while since she'd been this close and it made my heart pound. I did what I normally did when she got irresistibly close, stayed perfectly still, because if I moved, I might do something stupid. She pressed her lips into mine. The kiss was a lot gentler than I'd expected from someone like her, and she pulled away quickly. It was much too short for my liking.

"What was that for?" I whispered.

She smiled. "Bored and curious."

That was so cruel, and she didn't even know why.

"But," she continued. "If you're not interested, don't worry about it."

Like hell.

I cupped the side of her face and started kissing her over and over. It started out slow and cautious, but very quickly became something faster, deeper, hungrier.

She buried her hand in my hair at the back of my head and I pressed into her, guiding her to the floor. I leaned over her between her legs, still kissing her, not just her mouth anymore, I'd moved on to her neck and throat as well. This was going entirely too fast, but I couldn't bring myself to slow down because all I wanted was to feel closer to her, even if this was only one of her games.

I worked my hand up her shirt and let my fingers explore all over her soft skin. She arched up into me so I could reach around and unhook her bra. She moaned softly when I brought my hand back around. It was quiet, but enough to excite me even more. If I ran my hand up her skirt, I wondered if I could get her to make some real noise.

Not as though a part exists that I don't like about being with a woman, but if I had to choose my favorite, aside from the blatantly obvious, it would be the noises they make. I especially love hearing my name. I'm not sure if that makes me a little bit egotistical or not, but I just love feeling wanted.

She moved her hands down to my belt.

I heard Hiromasa from the stairs before he even got to the door. "You aren't answering my texts."

Saki and I both froze.

"My mom doesn't need me anymore." The door creaked open. "I thought...Sorry!" The door slammed shut.

He yelled some more apologizes while he ran down the stairs and out the front door.

I looked back at Saki. Her eyes weren't the same and she felt tense underneath me. Whatever had possessed her before was long gone now.

I sat up and leaned back against the bed. "Let me guess, curiosity satisfied?"

"Something like that," she said, clipping her bra back together. "It's better this way. You and me is a bad idea. I'm not sure what I was thinking."

Translation: Something like this was never going to happen again.

"Do you get off on being a tease?" I spat.

"Piss off." She stood up and straightened herself.

I clicked my tongue and turned my head away from her. She didn't say anything else before exiting the room, leaving me all alone, unsatisfied and on edge.

I punched the floor. It wasn't just one thing. The whole situation pissed me off. I was mad at Hiromasa for walking in. I was mad at her for leading me on. I was especially mad at myself for letting her drag me in so deeply, when I knew it was just a way to pass the time for her.

I let out a long breath and lay my head back on the bed. I shouldn't have said those things to her. What happened to not doing anything stupid?

Hiromasa sent me a few more texts later saying how sorry he was, but I didn't answer them. I decided to let him stew for a while. I was still upset, and I couldn't really figure him out either. If I walked in on a girl I liked with another guy, I think I'd feel sorrier for myself than I would for him.

I got up early the next morning and made my way to school. I wouldn't say I was in the best of moods, but I was certainly feeling better than before. I still hadn't answered Hiromasa's texts, deciding instead to do my apologizing at school, since I had a couple to hand out.

I shut the door to my shoe locker, only to find Hiromasa suddenly standing there.

I jumped. "God." I let out a long breath. "What are you trying to do? Give me a heart attack?"

"You didn't answer me all night." He looked genuinely worried.

"Yeah." I rubbed the back of my neck. "Sorry about that. I thought I'd just apologize today. I was a little bit pissed off last night, so I didn't answer you."

"No." He looked down. "I'm sorry I barged in like that. I didn't even think about it."

I chuckled. "We've been walking in and out of each other's houses and rooms unannounced for years. Of course you wouldn't think about it."

"I guess." He still sounded unconvinced.

I slipped on my school shoes and we began our walk to class. Hiromasa didn't speak again until we were nearly to class.

"So, are you..." He stopped and looked off to the side, fidgeting with his fingers. "I mean did you..." He sighed.

I turned and smiled at him. "Relax. Nothing happened. Well, nothing beyond what you saw anyway."

"Really?" His face was practically glowing.

I grumbled. "Could you try and look a little less happy at my misery, please?" I started walking again.

"Oh, right. Sorry." He caught up to me, still smiling.

I made a sound of disgust and shook my head.

"Hey, wait." The smile fell from his face and he looked confused. "So, you aren't dating?"

I shook my head. "I keep telling you. She's not into relationships. She thinks it's a waste of time."

He smacked my arm. "That's mean. You shouldn't take advantage of her like that."

"Ow." I grabbed my arm. "What the hell? Why do you assume it was me? She started that whole thing, you know?"

He looked sideways at me and squinted his eyes.

"Don't believe me? Fine. Alright." I put my hands up in surrender. "I'll remember to leave all my relationship advice up to you from now on, virgin."

He grabbed at his chest and did an exaggerated stagger into a wall, groaning like he'd been shot.

A couple of girls passed him staring and whispering. He immediately straightened up and waved at them with an awkward laugh. They hurried past, avoiding eye contact.

I started laughing. "Smooth."

"Totally your fault." He glared at me and stomped his foot.

When we sat down in the classroom, Saki, of course, wasn't there yet. She showed up at her usual time, a few precious seconds before the last bell rang. I didn't have time to talk to her, and she hardly looked at me; probably still mad. To her credit, she actually took notes in class and paid attention the majority of the time, so at least she hadn't totally given up over the summer.

When lunch period finally started, I turned to her immediately. "I need to talk to you."

She shrugged. "Yeah, fine."

I led her over to the back corner of the room.

"I'll be waiting outside, I guess?" Hiromasa said, and gestured at the door.

I nodded and he left, along with many of the other students. Some stayed, but they were mostly busy with their own conversations anyway.

I turned my attention back to her. She stood with her arms crossed, but didn't look particularly upset, no more than she usually did at school. I realized I had no idea where to start. I knew what I wanted to say, but I just couldn't get the words to formulate in my mind correctly. The atmosphere between us felt different, but why? I usually didn't have any problem separating physical acts from emotion, so why did this feel so weird?

"Uh, listen, I'm sorry about yesterday. I didn't mean to get so mad." I stuck my hands in my pockets and dragged my foot across the floor. "Also, I don't want you to feel like you have to be different around me now. I get the message. I'll keep my hands to myself. I just want things to stay like they were."

She laughed and smacked me in the chest with the back of her hand. "Is that why you've been looking so worried all day? It's fine. By the way, I love how you're apologizing to me, even though I'm the one who started kissing you in the first place." She sighed and shook her head. "Honestly, Kaito, you're probably the nicest guy I ever met."

"Me? Nice?" I chuckled. "You must be confusing me with Hiromasa."

"Really?" She cocked her head to the side. "Who is it that brings me in lunch every day? Who offered to keep me from failing all my tests this year? Oh, and who is it that keeps offering to buy me a phone all the time?" She tapped her chin. "Was it Hiromasa? Hmm...Oh!" She snapped her fingers and smiled sarcastically. "It was you."

"Is that a yes to the phone?" I asked.

She sighed and rolled her eyes. "Come on, idiot." She marched towards the door. "I hope you brought me something good today, too, because I'm starving."

I wish my reasons were so selfless, but I'm not so sure. It's not that I don't enjoy making her happy. I do, but there are other motivations. I needed to keep her interested in school because the thought of having to enter the next year without her there put a knot in my stomach. The phone would give me some peace of mind when it came to her safety, but I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't contact her all the time just for the sake of hearing from her.

I followed her to our normal spot outside and sat as I normally do, much to close. Saki didn't even bat an eye, but this too felt different to me. The whole thing felt off balance. Why was it so much harder not to act on my impulses? It's not as though I didn't think of her in that way before, so why did this routine act of mine suddenly feel so intimate? It didn't matter. I couldn't let this derail my main objective. I still needed to help her, and I still hadn't come up with any sort of plan to do so.