I awoke to my phone alarm and reached over to grab it off the night stand and turn it off. It was finally here, opening ceremony for my second year of high school. Maybe I should just stay in bed? I let my head fall back onto the pillow and lay there for a minute, then got up with a sigh.

I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and start my morning routine. It would be the same thing, day after day, week after week, just as it was last year and the year before that. Get ready, go to school, pretend to care, smile, come home, do homework, sit around, go to bed, get up and do it again.

I didn’t go to school because I wanted to. I went because I knew it's what I was supposed to do. I tried just hard enough to keep from failing, and because of that, I ended up landing in the middle of the road in everything I did; academics, sports, even stuff like home economics and art. I didn't join any of the clubs either. I wasn’t looking to compete for colleges. The vocational track was fine with me. That was already going to be more headaches then I wanted to deal with.

I combed my hair and put on the standard black school uniform. I guess some students might kill for a little color, especially the girls, but I couldn't care less. My standard breakfast was two simple slices of toast. I actually can cook a little, nothing too fancy, but there hardly seems a point since I'm the only one here.

When I got into junior high, my parents started staying away more and more. They were both traveling business consultants. That's actually only met because they were called in to work for the same company. They don't work together all the time anymore, but they are almost always away. Locally in Japan or abroad, it doesn't matter.

It's not that I think they don't love me, not exactly. I just think I didn't really fit into their plans. When I was born, they had to put their careers on hold, now they are free to do as they want.

I spread some butter on my toast and scarfed it down, then headed to the door, put on my shoes, and grabbed my bag. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I took it out to look at the message. It was from my girlfriend, Kaho. She said she was waiting outside, but I didn't bother to answer since I was about to head out the door anyway. When I got outside, she was leaning against the wall just outside the front gate. She gave me a wave and a smile when she saw me. Her short auburn hair was done up in pigtails with red ribbon.

"Hey," I said to her.

"Morning." She grabbed my hand.

We started walking hand and hand down the neighborhood sidewalk. I'm sure for normal people this would have produced some sort of excitement or joy, but I didn't feel a damn thing. I never do. Kaho is sweet and cute. My girlfriends usually are, but they've never made my heart skip a beat or given me that butterflies in the stomach feeling. I don't think it's their fault either. I always say yes when girls ask me out. It’s not that I particularly like them or dislike them, but I just can’t bring myself to turn them down. I think of the rejection in their faces after they worked up the courage to ask and I just can’t say no. I keep hoping that at some point I'll develop feelings for them, but this never seems to happen. I don't expect to get flustered or anything, just something subtle.

I’m not sure why people continue to ask me out. I’m not particularly attractive, nor do I have any skills that might stand out. Maybe some people just have a drive to try and fix things that are broken, even if they don’t realize it themselves.

Girls might be the only category in which I don't hit dead average. I did manage to pull a little ahead of the race there, all thanks to Izumo Yokota. She was in her last year of high school when I was in my first. Her specialty was finding lonely first years like me and, "break them in", as she so lovingly called it, not that I ever complained. After a while, she would get bored and cast her toy aside for a new one.

"Hey, I was thinking," Kaho said. "I’m busy for a while after school, but do you want to go get something to eat later this evening? You know, to celebrate the first day?"

"Sure," I said. "That sounds great."

It didn’t. It sounded like it was going to be a lot of effort, but who am I to ruin a nice girl's time?

“Given any thought to what club you might join this year?” she asked.

“Hm.” I forced my face into a serious expression. “Well, I did so well in it last year, I’m thinking about continuing in the ‘going home club’.”

“You jerk.” She shoved me playfully. “I thought you were going to answer me seriously. Why don’t you join the photography club with me?”

I shrugged. “Doesn’t sound like my kind of thing.”

“Do you even have a thing?” she asked.

I smirked. “You’ve got me there. How about I think about it?”

She seemed satisfied with that, which was good, because honestly, I don’t know that I could keep up my pretending to give a crap charade for much longer than I already did. I was usually pretty drained by the end of the day.

We walked the rest of the way to school together while she filled me in about the parts of her spring break that I'd missed along the way. When we got there, we reported to the school gymnasium for opening ceremony and sat down in the crowded room along with the other students.

I looked around at my peers while the principle, teachers, and select students all gave their speeches. They all looked so enthusiastic, so excited to start a new school year. Kaho even smiled most of the time. I must’ve been missing something basic. It happened that way year after year. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves without any effort at all, while I just went through the motions.

I’m not sure exactly when it started, but before I knew it, I found myself having to force myself to smile at things I knew should make me happy, laugh at things I knew should be funny, seem unhappy at things that should be sad. It’s not like I felt nothing at all, I just had to work at it a little harder than most.

After the ceremony concluded, we all filed into our designated classrooms. I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned around.

"Hey," Hiromasa said. "Excited for our second year?" He smiled.

He was as bright and cheerful as ever. Maybe that's why we had been friends so long. His excitable personality was a great contrast to my apathetic attitude. He was the only one that I actually legitimately enjoyed being around anymore; the only one I didn’t have to force myself in front of. He still had his cheesy smile and messy hair, but had chosen to dye it a light orange when high school started in an effort to stand out to the girls. It hadn't worked.

"I guess." I said. "Where did you want to sit?"

Hiromasa started to scan the room. I looked too, not that I really cared. It’s not like I had any friends besides Hiromasa anyway. Kaho had a different homeroom, so she wasn't even a factor.

My eyes stopped on a girl with long black hair sitting in the back corner by the window. Her chin rested on her palm while she stared out at the school yard absent mindedly. Was it her? Higoshi Saki? It was. I was sure of it. My breath caught in my throat and my heart came alive in my chest. I started walking without even meaning to, leaving Hiromasa behind to take the seat next to her in the back.

She didn't look my way at all, just continued to stare out the window. She was certainly as quiet as I remembered, but I couldn’t get a good look at her face. Should I say something? I could introduce myself. That wouldn't be too weird, right? What if it wasn’t her? I didn’t want to come off as desperate. It's not like I was really looking for a new girlfriend or a friend of any sort. I turned around and faced forward, deciding to stay where I was at least. If it wasn't her, oh well. Sitting next to a pretty girl all year probably wouldn't be the worst choice I'd make.

Hiromasa took the seat next to me, confusion written all over his face. Didn't he recognize her? No? Maybe I was wrong.

A middle aged man entered the classroom. I'd had him for math classes before, although never as a homeroom teacher. He was strict in his teaching method, but as long as you did what you were supposed to, he could also be very friendly. The students who were still wandering around found their seats.

"Hello, everyone." He stepped in front of the podium at the front. "I am Mr. Nagashima. I will be your homeroom teacher. Since you're all second years, I expect high school life is familiar to you now, so we should have a good year. If anyone has any concerns, please don't hesitate to come see me." He paused. "It looks like we have some new faces this year. Let's go around the room and introduce ourselves, starting with the front row here." He gestured at the guy sitting in seat closest to the door. "Stand up and say your name. Feel free to add anything else you want. We should get to know one another."

Good. Introductions. This would work. I would know for sure if it was her now. But if he was starting all the way over there, I was going to have to wait a while. I settled into my chair.

Most students stood up and said their name, then added a little something extra about themselves, like what they were interested in or clubs they'd joined. Some even said something funny or cute.

When Hiromasa stood up, he added, "Single" at the end of his name. This got quite a few laughs and even a chuckle from the teacher. When my turn arrived, I merely said my name and sat down. I don't have any interests and I'm not funny or cute. I looked over at my mystery girl. She hadn't moved at all. Maybe it really wasn't her.

When it was finally her turn, she didn't say anything.

"Last, but not least," Nagashima prompted.

She turned her eyes to the front, but didn't bother getting up or even lifting her head off her hand. "Higoshi Saki."

My lips spread into a smile I didn’t have to force. It was her. There was no mistake now. But she had gone right back to staring out the window. Didn't she remember us at all? Although, Hiromasa didn't act like he remembered either. Why was I the only one?

The rest of the day went by annoyingly slow. When the teacher dismissed us, Higoshi stood up and moved quickly out the door.

"Kaito, you want to-" Hiromasa started.

I didn't hear the rest of it. I raced out the door and into the hall.

"Higoshi," I called.

She stopped and turned around, but didn't say anything.

"Uh...I'm Nagase Kaito. Do you remember me? We've met before."

"Yes," she said. "I remember you."

I didn't know what to say. Yes? Then why didn't she say anything?

"Was there something else?" she asked.

"No," I said. "I suppose not."

"Great," she said, and turned. "Later."

She gave me a wave over her shoulder as she left.

Bitch. What the hell was her problem? I wasn't expecting a huge gushy reunion, but a "Hi. How have you been?" would’ve been nice. I saved her and she was acting like I didn't even exist.

"Hey," Hiromasa said, entering the hall. "I was talking to you, you know? What's with you today? You're acting really weird."

"You know that girl I was sitting next to." I pointed down the hall, even though she was long gone.

"Yeah. The pretty one with long hair, right? I don't think that's very nice by the way. You have a girlfriend. You shouldn't be chasing other women."

"No.” I shook my head. “I mean, that's the girl from the subway three years ago."

"Oh," Hiromasa said, stretching out the word. "I thought that name sounded familiar. What did she say?"

"Nothing. She didn't really want to talk to me."

Hiromasa laughed. "Welcome to my world, buddy." He slapped my shoulder. "Come on, you've got a cute girlfriend waiting for you. One who wants to talk to you."

I nodded, but I couldn't stop thinking about her. She really didn't want anything to do with me at all? I thought we'd made a connection that night by the train. Was it all just some childish fantasy of mine? Maybe that's why she snuck out in the morning without saying a word. I can't believe I'd stuck myself next to someone who couldn't even be bothered to say, "Hi". Maybe Hiromasa would switch with me. He probably wouldn't mind either way. I don't know why I cared so much. Why couldn't I just suck it up and sit next to her? For some reason I dreaded this. I dreaded coming in tomorrow and having to sit next to her.

Higoshi Saki, an anomaly in my mundane routine.