I sat there in the infinite void. My conscience was broken and I was not capable of logical thought as the physical construct that controlled that was long gone. In a sick irony the only thought I could fathom was “Why?”.

at that stage it was irrelevant to ask why I was asking “Why?” in an infinitely recursive loop. It was as if I was questioning the purpose of existence itself.

Why is the eventuality of defeat for us a constant?

Why must the hero always win?

Why is the presumptuous morality of humans’ right?

Why is it that demons are evil?

These questions were asked an innumerable number of times. However there was one thing I had going for me. I existed. It wasn’t the assumed absolute termination of everything that defined me. And the fact that, that was true was a spark that could overcome inevitability itself.

Infinity itself is irrational and nothing but a flawed concept. The machine that could only say “Why?” over an infinite number of eventualities escaped the loop;

Who am I? Me.

Why am I here? To usurp fate.

Where am I going? A place where I can contradict the false construct of fate.

This originated from the overwhelming will to undermine the inevitability of the loss of my race. I could accept the defeat and went to rest. I could even accept the atrocities they did. I loathed the apostles of the end and indoctrinating hierarchy with the very core of my being. However, I don’t hold civilians of either side in contempt. If I were to then I would lose the only defining factor between what I am and what I hate the most. I don’t think either side is better than the other; nor do I feel a particular longing to destroy the other side. Mabey it was just idealistic pontification that led my race to destruction. But if I didn’t have a dream to see all races of the world work together in a synergistic manner towards a better end for all then what would I be but them. All that I cannot accept is the concept of an absolute path leading to a predefined end outside the context of absolute truths brought about through logical reasoning (1+1=2).

My conscience, through infinite eventualities, was reconstructed. I had no idea where I was or what would happen. Suddenly, a torrent of memories, long gone, fell upon me mercilessly. Imagine how it feels to gain a family and find love; to only have that all destroyed in ways so horrible it transcends your worst nightmares. I could only lament.

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nvm stuff about LUX