The Past, Last Part

It's been a month of it and Christian turned icy cold and began to live his life having one goal, make his money righteous. He began to hate love. If he never loved anyone, they will never leave. His father, mother and now Merlin. He began to think that his destiny has no love for him. The state of devastation that turns you void and no matter how much you want to cry at your ravage, no tears dared to spill out and ease your heart and you could feel the rushing of agony in your vein, stirring your mind. The feeling of emptiness residing in his heart. The state of destruction he is going through is incomprehensible for him.

He is left with only a promise he made to his mother. The promise to make Sophie his bride but he knows that if he suddenly appears on her doorstep saying this, this will make matters worse. He just wants to live his life protecting Sophie and fulfilling his promise.

'I tried to twist fate and get away from you. But, even after trying that much, here I am, bending my knees at your doorsteps to get what belongs to me..'

The darkness consumed his heart and his terrors of dark increased turning it into an actual phobia. Whenever he sees darkness, he can see his heart in it; void, dark, desolated. Lost in the feeling of betrayal and heartbreak, he decided to leave his emotions behind. There's no point in loving someone, they will eventually leave you. Relations are nothing but a burden, the more you feel connected to them the more isolated they will make you from yourself.

Christian then dedicated to working hard to earn ethical money. He was left with the desire to become someone his mother would be proud of, he has to live his life with virtues and fulfill the promise he made to his mother years ago.

..But, you can easily stray from your path when you are in darkness...

He was sitting in his cabin, lost in thoughts when his assistant; Henley came,

"Sir, here are your divorce papers." She handed him the paper reluctantly, he took them and stared at them.

"Sir, maybe you should listen to Ma'am Merlin first before taking such a drastic measure. We all know how much she means to you." Henley tried to make him understand.

"When trust is broken it cannot be built again, Richard. And yeah, not all fortunes are good." He said emotionless and signed the papers.

"Send them to her." He leaned back on his chair, Henley gave him a look of pity but decided to be silent as she took the papers and left.

***

It's been a month, he was in a state of depression but from inside from outside, he is an icy cold guy. He was in a club drinking to forget his pain but then Tyler came as he began to say,

"Dude, Sophie's brother had an accident. He is in a coma, Sophie is jobless, they are in a state of crisis." He stopped as he clenched his hands in a fist. He gritted his teeth. That's all he has left now... Sophie. He has suffered enough and he has no place to go other than her but he was protesting about how to meet her.

"She has finished her graduation. Find a job for her." Christian said coldly as he left and went to his home, trying not to think about it anymore.

***

It's been two years, Christian is 28 years old now, his once golden heart that used to care about the one he loved is now tainted black because there's no one he loves now. One day, he got a call from Juliette, he had no intentions to go but when she mentioned something about Sophie so he had to go.

They are in a cafe as Juliette began to say,

"You're thinking of fulfilling your promise, don't you? You want to marry Sophie-"

"It has nothing to do with you."

"Knowing Amelia, she wouldn't have said a thing to Sophie, do you think you'll suddenly appear at her doorsteps saying if you want to marry her and she'll let you?"

"It's none of your concern."

"Even if you tell her everything, she will never accept you and if she knows that you are her Aunt's son; her cousin, she will never marry you. Eugene is your cousin and Sophie is her step-sister, what is she to you? A thing? Or someone dear?"

"What are you trying to say?"

"Okay, let's be straightforward, don't you think Sophie will marry you just because of a promise. She is already in a state of trouble, the only way she would let you fulfil your promise would be if you help her to escape her devastation in return for something. A contract marriage about sexual intercourse.." And this was enough to enrage him as he stood up and left without saying another word.

Her words caused him to go into the darkness more. He was beyond angry not at her but rather himself but her words somehow held some reality, if he would appear before her saying she is his, she would never believe it and since Sophie doesn't know anything he has no choice.

After some time, Christian decided to visit his Aunt. Amelia was shocked to see him after these years, they both sat down as he told her everything that has happened till now. Amelia hugged him as she began to cry, for his loss, for what he has gone through and for not being able to attend the funeral of her own sister. This broke Amelia's heart.

When she calmed down, Christian began to say,

"I heard what happened to Eugene." She gave him a sad smile and nodded.

"Sophie is working hard." A silence fell upon them. But, Christian broke it and began to say,

"I.. want to fulfill my promise." Amelia was taken aback by his words.

"Sophie will never agree to marry you. First, She doesn't know anything. Second, She will never marry, not until Eugene wakes up. Third, Your age gap."

"I know Aunt he cannot recover with his current treatment and you need money for a better one." Amelia understood what he is trying to imply as she spoke in a threatening tone,

"Don't you dare to make her marry you for money."

"What option is left then? I possibly can't take her with me just because she belongs to me. I don't want any illicit relationship with her. Only, if she knew everything from the start." He said exasperated.

"I want to give her a normal life," Amelia said firmly. Amelia took a deep breath as she stood up,

"I will not tell her anything. And I won't force her to do anything either. Do whatever you want and let her decide what she wants."

"And what if she refuses?"

"You better leave her life then."

"That's what I can't do," he said standing up.

"If she refuses, I'll tell her everything and then we will see what she says."

"She will hate me for hiding it," Amelia said, scared.

"Aunt, it is your fault for hiding it," Christian said firmly and Amelia couldn't believe what she was hearing. Is it really that Christian who said that he wants Sophie to have a normal life? Who is this cold guy?

"Okay, but remember, I'll not force her."

"Don't worry, I have my ways." He said as he left, leaving Amelia startled by his words.

Christian then went to the shop where Sophie works, he hasn't seen her for years. He wants to see how he looks. He entered the grocery shop she used to work at. His eyes fell upon a smiling face who was working earnestly. A smile crept upon his lips when he saw her. How can he forget these big hazel eyes filled with hope? He brought a bar of chocolate and went to her counter for billing. She smiled as he stared at her.

"Is everything alright, Sir?" She asked, raising an eyebrow. He shook his head and turned and left. 'Just when did you grow into a woman from a kid?' He thought to himself and left.

Christian then went to Tyler to tell him.

"Man! Do you even know how young she is?" Tyler said agitatedly.

"At least I am not taking her into my home and using her as a thing."

"You are using her. Man I get it she can help you but how are you supposed to make her marry you? You are certainly not thinking of giving her a sudden marriage proposal, do you?"

Christian remained silent as he stood up and left before saying, "I just came here to tell you that I have decided to fulfill my promise."

Then next year, after preparing everything to make her his bride, he first made her lose her job from the shop so that she faced money problems. But soon she got another job and he knew it's not enough. He made sure it won't and then he sent the marriage proposal to her. He was so amused to know that she tore his card the moment she came to know about the terms of marriage.

And he saw her for the first time, she was angelic, pure. Her innocent self was a source of entertainment for him. She obviously declined his offer but a little intimidation was enough to make her agree to marry him and then his phase of fears started.

Even when Amelia came to know about the reason for their marriage- she went to Christian,

"What the hell is that about?!" Snarled her.

"What?" he said as if he is not even aware of what she is talking about.

"Why the hell are you making your marriage just a game of lust?"

"This has to be like this."

"Listen, Christian, Sophie is my daughter. She is not a toy. Don't you dare to comply on that contract."

"Aunt, An intercourse between a husband and wife is inevitable." He said monotonously.

"Christian.. just what the hell happened to you?" She spoke sadly. He gave her a bored look as she said, "At least... promise me to protect her.."

"Aunt, I have made enough promises. I have no intentions of making more."

"Please.. protect her.. never defile her.." Amelia began to sob. Christian gulped hard and turned his head away, "I'll try my best."

Scared...

He was scared to love her. Even though he fulfilled his promise but he was lost in his apprehension that she might not fall for him as he broke her. He never wants to feel loved again and lost in that delusion, that to push her away from him, he has to make her hate him and to break her and he did. He shattered her. Just to avoid love and not face the pain of losing her, he did what he considered best even though it was his other mistake. But then he soon realized his mistake as he began to try his best to make her feel secure in his arms.

Caring...

Filled with penitence for his deed, he began to desire forgiveness, he wanted to turn this dusty relation into something memorable. He devoted his life to correct what's wrong, to build a broken heart with his love. He gathered her scattered pieces and put them in place and evoked what she desires; love. He tried his best to make her feel relaxed in his presence. He wanted to become her salvation. He wanted to remove that feeling of being defiled from her. He tried his best to care.

And during this time, Eugene woke up and he told her everything about their marriage and about Sophie to him. Eugene was devastated at first to come to know that Sophie is his step-sister but he loves her a lot, he knows how desperate she was for him to wake up. And no matter what, Eugene wants his sister to be liberated from those shackles of imprisonment. He loves her dearly. He was angry at his mother for not telling them anything but he decided to remain silent and at the right moment, he burst his emotions and left to find a way for Sophie to be released.

And after all these tribulations and prevailing obstacles together, Christian is now finally freed. Free from that malevolent love of Merlin, from that cursed money he earned, free those terrors. He is Loved.

Receiving the love of her wife, the intense feeling of affection from her. The ultimate sweetness of her. The holy rapture that fills his whole being. The blessing of having her as his wife. She made him feel loved- once again. She ignites his heart with the flares of her love. She melted the ice of his with her fierce fire. He knows what melts his heart, it wasn't love.

It was their toxic marriage that poisoned both of them with lethal feelings that longed liberation and those feelings of being free caused both of them to be loved.

But an uneasiness always lingers in his heart because he thought that if Sophie ever came to know about the reason for their marriage, she would leave him but when she said that will never leave him, he felt like he got everything in this world. The lamentable has become their salvation. Their toxic marriage is not toxic anymore. It is now an eternal source of gratification.