फिर ले आया दिल मजबूर

क्या कीजे

रास न आया रहना दूर

क्या कीजे

दिल कह रहा उसे मुकम्मल कर भी आओ

वो जो अधूरी सी बात बाकी है

वो जो अधूरी सी याद बाकी ह

M

"Hello...who's there? "I asked.

.............

"No it can't be possible, how can I ? no I can't do this please understand." I said .

..................

"Ok. I_i wi..ll come" .I stammered.

............................

"Hmm, Byy. "I hung up.

How can I ? I can't go there. I can't face all those things, but I can't say no to him. He had done so many things for me. He was the one there for me, when no one was there. He helped me. I will go there for him, I can't run away everytime like a coward. Picking of my phone, I booked my tickets for india. Taking a deep breath, I turned on my engine, and made my way towards my apartment.

After taking a shower, I changed into my shorts and hoodie as it is cold here . It's December means snowfall, Christmas and my so called birthday.

I used to love Christmas. I celebrated it every year . In india people are not that excited about Christmas but mine is a exception case. My doll used to take me out every year in Christmas parties and she give me many gifts. She is truly my santa claus. The one person whom I love more than myself. why you do this to me god? I have never done anything wrong with anyone, Then why me? You distanced me from everyone whom I love dearly. You hate me that much? That's why I lost my belief in you. Why I am even asking you. You never listened to me not now, not at that time. I still remember when we first time meet,it was Christmas eve.

"Hey, you little santa come here."He ordered me...

I timidly went near him. As he looked very serious. Did i do something wrong? Why is he calling me? A hot serious .Shut up!

"Take off your mask."He said. I didn't respond and stand there like statue. How can I take off my mask. If I take it off then he will definitely come to know that it's me.

"Are you deaf ? I asked u to take off your mask."He said irritatedly....

"Ok, so you want me to do that "He said.And stretched his hand and removed my mask.

"Oo, so you are the santa claus."He said amusingly.

"Vo...vo mai i'i.vo."why the hell I am stammering. Mother earth swallow me. Then he removed stick from my bun, leaving them to fall. I looked at him shock.

"Cute". He said smirking and slightly caressed my left cheek. Sending shivers through my body and went away.....

My thoughts got interrupted by the ringing of door bell. I opened the door to see little Ava standing there pouting. She is the only reason I smile all these years. She lives here with her parents the next door. I meet her two years ago in the park where she is standing crying, as she got separated from her mother. From that day we become very close and as the time passes, inseperable..

"Hey baby, why are u pouting?" I picked her up and asked.

"Maai you are leaving me?" She asked on the verge of crying...I shook my head..

"No baby,who said that?" I asked her. While wiping her few drops.

"Mumma shaid that you ale going to kindia"She said still crying. Making me laugh....

"Baby it's india and I will come back after some days. Don't cry and I will bring lots of beautiful indian dresses, toys and sweets for my ava."I said her.

"You bling sweets for me? Gulab jaaun and that kaju takli."She said excitedly. She loves indian sweets.

"Yes my love, I will bring kaju katli and gulab jamun for you and various other sweets too." I said while laughing on her cute English. She still has some problems with her pronounciation....

"But how can I celebrate my four birthdays without you?" She pouted.

"I will be back by then with a lots of gift for you." I said while hugging her closer.

"Plomise " she asked showing me her pinky.

"Promise" I said while holding her pinky and kissing it.

"Okk, now do you want to eat pav bhaji ? Then we will watch' beauty and the beast.'" I asked her.

"Yehh ! Beauty and bleast. "She started jumping. I just chukled.

Then I prepared pav bhaji for us and fed her. Later her mom took her as tomorrow is her school.................

The next seven days past in furry. And now here I am sitting in my flight to reach my destination. I don't know where this journey take me. I leaned in my seat closing my eyes. (flashbacks are in acrylics)

"You are beautiful. A different type of beautiful." He stated.

"I am a fat air balloon." I pouted.

"No you are chubby. And I find you cute." He said with a smile.

"Really ?" I asked.

"Really." He said with a bright smile.

"Mam please tie your belt. The flight is about to land"........Air hostess said shaking me , waking me from my wild dream. I simply nodded..

Soon the pilot announced our arrival. As soon as, I stepped out from the plane I took a deep breath, to calm my senses. I hired a cab to reach my destination. Mumbai, the city of my dream once, I loved this city like anything. And now I am fearing to put a step on this land. Everything Is seemed to be changed now this city, our life . Soon I reached my destination.

I entered the building. I looked around they really done a great job with interiors and made my way towards reception. A girl was sitting there with glasses her head was Buried in her laptop.

"Excuse me."I said

"Yes mam how can I help you? "She asked professionally. She looked in early twenties.

"Ask your sir that mahi is here to meet him." I told her.

"Mam, do you have any appointment. Sir is not able to meet you without appointment."She said.

"Just tell him that I am here to meet him." I told her. She talked with him.

"Sorry mam, you can go. 54th floor this way. Sir asked you to use his personal elevator." She said apologitcally...

"No, you don't have to be sorry, It's okk, Thanks." I said and smiled to relief her and made my way towards elevator. I am trying to steady my breaths. (Keyword-trying) but, nothing is helping me. After five long years I am going to meet him. I am trying to control my tears. The bing of elevator took me out from my dream land. I took a deep breath and stepped out from elevator. Standing outside his cabin I am trying to muster up some courage to knock. Finally, I knocked. I hear a deep come in. I entered and looked at him. As soon as he. Saw me , he stood up from his chair and made his way towards me .

"Baccha, kese hai?" (baby how are you). He engulf me in a tight hug. I hugged him back, tears were continually flowing from my eyes....

"Shh.. bachha don't cry. I am here. I am very sorry. I am bad ,very bad I left you alone to face all those shit. I am sorry." He said. His voice was filled with guilt and regret. I can't see him like this . Afterall he is the only one for me.

"No bhai., It's not your fault . It was no one's fault. It was my destiny." I broke the hug and smiled sadly at him.

"No but I can't protect you, I am the worst brother."He said sadly....

"Never say this you are the best brother. Now leave all this tell me about yourself and why you called me so suddenly?" I asked him..

"Hmm . Take a seat I have many things to tell you."He said motioning me towards the leather sofa...

"I am very proud of you my sister. You achieved this much in such a short spam of time. Look at you, you look so different and very beautiful like a fairy...." He said lovingly.

"Bhai , that is just a way to forget everything . You tell me about yourself. You and Jiya dii have been married na? Have u any child? What is his or her name?" I asked him hurriedly .

"Calm down babygirl. Yes me and Jiya got married and it's been four years and we have a pretty daughter diya." He said with a wide smile.

"Wow , that's so great. I always wanted to see your children and to play with them. But unfortunately umm....." I looked down..

"It's okk now you are here. You can play with her as much as you want." He said encouraging me.

"Bhai how's everyone here? I mean uncle-aunty and e_everyone." I stammered.

"Everyone is fine. Mom dad are all good and everyone is fine."He said looking at me. I looked down. I don't want him to know,whom I am asking about....

"Mahi." He called me...

"Huhh."I looked up.

"Aditya is fine." He said smiling. I turned my face to otherside embarassingly....

"Bhai, do you have any picture of diya?" I asked him. Trying to avoid the topic. he took out phone from his pocket and showed me picture of diya. She look exact like Jiya dii.

"Bhai, why you called me here? That to soo suddenly. Is there something tell me."I asked him.

"Yes I want you to do something for me ." He said I nodded to continue him....

"Yes bhai, you can asked me for anything. I will definitely do it."I said assuring him.....

"First answer my question, do you love someone."He asked me.

"No bhai, what are you saying. How can I love someone. And why you asked me this?" I asked him Something is wrong.

"I want you to get married."He said calmly. I looked at him shockingly .

"What are you saying bhai it can't be possible. I cannot marry someone. I can't do it." I told him shaking my head in no...

"Bachaa , listen do it. Do it for me. I want you to get married and that's final." He said sternly....

"Bhai, how can you....no you can't do this. You know i.i no....bhai I can't."I said standing up from the couch. Tears were flowing out from my eyes.

"Consider this as a reconciliation for what I had done for you." He said loudly...making me turn around. I looked at him in disbelief. No he can't say such words.....

"Bhai..... Is that what you want. Okk I will marry anyone you want. And don't consider it as my reconciliation, I am doing this for my brother."I was truly hurt by his word. I turned around and made my way towards outside.

"Mahi, you are taking me wrong. I didn't mean that. Bachaa plz listen to me."He tried to stop me...

"It's okk bhai. You don't have to feel bad. There is nothing new in it. I will face it, like eyerytime I did." I said smiling sadly on my faith...

"I will take my leave bhai. Take care. "I told him . And was about to click the knob, his words stop me.

"Don't you wanna know whom you are getting married ? "He asked me...

"I trust you. " I said without turning. Closing the door behind. My life already has so many dramas, now this one....

On my way outside, I collide with someone. More precisely a girl. Making her files fall on the floor.

"I am sorry miss I was just lost somewhere."I said her sorry and quickly bent down to pick her files. But she was standing there like a statue. I looked up. Shock would be a understatement. There standing my long gone best friend or my only friend in this mean earth aleey (alisha) I stand up to immediately get a tight slap on my right cheek....

"Bitch, where were you? You know I am searching for you like a mad. I can't even imagine that you did this to me. You never considered me as your friend. I just hate you."She hugged me tightly and started sobbing...

"It's not like you think. I was not in the condition to face anyone. So I just did which I am good in ran away. Like always I run away. I am a bloody coward, I am a coward alley." I started crying pathetically while hugging her .........

"Shh... stupid you are the strongest girl ,I ever meet you idiot. I am just angry with you that you never said anything, not even once tried. I knew you would have tell something to Dev bhai that's why I asked him but he refused. I literally begged him to tell me the truth. Two years ago he finally told me everything with a promise to never say anything to anyone. I am sorry mahi, I am really sorry because of bhai you......I cut her off....

"Don't say sorry. It was no your fault. After what he did to me, I just wanna hate him but I can't. My heart stills loves him, in years my love for him never died. It increases day by day, minute by minute.... I said looking down...

"It's his loss mahi, he lost the biggest treasure for which anyone would have desired. Okk now leave this, let's go and you are coming with me."She said.

"No I can't. If I will come with you then somehow, he came to know about my arrival. Please understand this time and don't say anything to yash."I pleaded her.

"But mahi where did you stay? No you are coming with me at my house and that final." She said and huffed

"Alley, please give me sometime. I will tell you everything but right now I just wanna sleep. my head is spinning due to jetlag. I will meet you tomorrow. I already have my bookings in hotel so you don't worry." I said and squeezed her shoulder lightly assuring her .

"Okk.... But I will drop you." She said and I noodded my head obediently.....

We settled in her car and started to move towards the hotel where I am staying. I checked in and made my way towards my room and hit the bed but flashes of his face are coming in front my eyes. I again passed another night with the help of my medicines. I am tired I just wanna a end. End of my miserablity, end of everyone's hatred towards me and end of this life.... I never thought my saviour will turn into my distructor........

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