My skin twitches, waking me up. My wrists are burning, just slightly as I rub them, half-asleep until my mind becomes aware of the thickly muscled, slightly hairy leg pressed between my thighs and the arm slung over my middle. The male's warm breath wafts over the back of my neck, my body nestled snug with his.

Oh, gods. I smooth my free hand over the furs I'm sleeping on. All at once the memories come rushing back. I'm in Urto's suite of rooms in Irkalla, where I have been for six days. Thelios and Thane are... oh gods.

Six days. And I don't know how my males are recovering. If they're recovering. I can feel them, the bonds telling me that they're still there, but that's all I can sense.

I open my eyes, trying to stay pliant in Urto's sleeping embrace. I don't want to alert the War god that I'm awake. Rasted and Gired are in front of me, their eyes glowing soft yellow in the dim light. I start to move Urto's arm off of me.

He wakes up, instantly alert, like always.

"Love? Where are you going?" he murmurs. I think he kisses the back of my hair.

I hate when he calls me, 'love.'

"To wash up?" I say, frozen with my body half-crawling away.

He chuckles, "liar," he says huskily. "Come back."

"No," I reply simply. "I don't wish to sleep anymore." I eye Rasted and Gired warily. They are agitated, my assassins. Glowing eyes fix on Urto meanly and I realize that my left-and-right-hands are frustrated that they can't do more to help me. I have tried to sneak away from the War god innumerable times. For the goddess of shadows I'm terrible at sneakery.

"I want to see my mother and daughter," I tell Urto when he is quiet.

I feel the bond flex in a way that I have never felt Thane and Thelios' do. It's a little like Urto is squeezing my stomach, making my heart pound harder in my chest.

"You wish to see them, love. And I won't let you do that."

"Why?" I ask. The blood bond has worked. He can tell that I am lying.

"Because, it's better if you have a clean break, love. No more twin bonds. It's just me, now."

"But it's not," I whisper. I can see those brightly radiating red bonds pouring from my chest. They aren't even dimmed.

"Why are you so loyal to them?" Urto sounds genuinely confused. "They have both betrayed you. The twin in the above killed you to be with another female and I know for a fact that Thelios' is one of Inanji's favored lovers."

My body slumps back down to the bed. Urto takes the opportunity to cuddle me back into his body with a satisfied rumble deep in his chest.

"What if I'm a terrible female, like Inanji said?" I ask him. I don't address his questions. I love my males. They were my choice for a reason.

He just snorts derisively. "I knew she was flapping her gums without cause. She is a jealous shrew, love. Always has been even when you were a tiny thing."

I think about it. "Did you know me then?"

"All of us watched you, sweet thing," comes the easy reply. "I know much more than you think I do."

"But you don't know everything," I reply.

"Not everything. I will find out. The secrets that you keep, even from the bond, I will discover them eventually."

I don't really have very many secrets. Urto may be disappointed if he finds out how little I've really done. Those secrets that I do have I don't intend on letting him ever find out, simply because I know that I'm at a disadvantage with him. He's eons older, more powerful or at least more capable of using his power, and I have lost my males... temporarily lost them.

I fight off the feeling of being helpless. I am a goddess. I'm sure my father has plans, but so do I. No matter how Urto treats me, I know that our bond is wrong. I can see it, literally.

But Urto makes for a good guard dog. I can't shake him and my assassins can't help without revealing their existence. My Basru are in the hallways outside of the corridor, just lurking.

I stand up, shedding Urto's touch as I go.

"Mara?" he sits up, staring at me with eyes just slightly reddened from whatever anger he is feeling.

"I'm hungry, Urto."

"We can try again?" he offers.

"No," I scorn his attempts. "Your blood still boils in my veins. Those small drops are all I can take."

"It can't be," he snarls a bit as he rises, naked, from the bed. As usual, I avert my gaze from him. Albeit, it's impressive, but not something I want to see.

"I need my males' blood, Urto. I was starving in the above. I will not starve here, too."

I need to see my males.

"You will drink from me, Mara-"

"I sleep in your bed," I cut him off. "I dine with you even though no one in the Underworld needs to eat."

"You have not bathed with me," he points out.

I just toss him a scornful glare. He can't bathe in the Crone River and I refuse a bath. Disgusting.

"I need my males, Urto."

"Fine!" he roars. He rips his pants off of the chair he draped them on and force his legs into them. "You will go with me, then, Mara. Drinking only." He smiles a little evilly, "they are not awake, yet, anyway."

I hurry to dress before he changes his mind. Three days and I haven't seen or heard from my father. My mother brings Poppy to see me, but my daughter is so intimidated by Urto that she barely speaks to me. Urto and Erra spend their visits glaring at each other in fuming silence, which makes us females feel as if we are sitting in a room of posturing male lions. Not the most comfortable feeling.

I practically run out of the room, nearly tripping over Belen-cat and Taffy-kitty, who are sleeping right across the doorway.

Lier leaps to his feet from his uncomfortable-looking position across the hall. "Princess!" he leaps up in joy.

"We are going to see my males, Lier. Hurry," I tell him.

We must make an interesting sight. One lone female racing through the hallways, lost, because I don't know where I'm going, with giant warriors following me.

"Where are they?" I ask breathlessly.

"In your father's garden mausoleum," Lier answers. My brother grabs my hand and tugs my in the proper direction. He ignores Urto's growl of warning and I tighten my fingers on his hand. Urto has already torn me away from my brother once.

We emerge into the light of the Underworld in front of a black-walled mausoleum. The painted grey doors with gleaming bronze handles are achingly familiar. My steps falter. "It is just like-"

"Yes, the temple in the above was modeled on this," Lier coaxes me closer to his side. He stops me in the doorway. "Listen, Princess. This is hard, understand? They were grievously wounded and-"

"She knows. She was there," Urto interrupts. His red eyes glare at Lier. "She is here only to feed from them."

Lier nods without looking the War god in the eyes. His anger trembles down his fingertips into me. My brother hates Urto.

I take a deep breath. "I'm ready."

I walk in and see them. My knees are shaking, but I force my legs to carry me forward. The faint scent of blood wafts through the air. All of my gargoyles are positioned around my males and I feel a surge of gratefulness that they are protecting them as best they can.

Thane and Thelios are stretched out on top of white slabs of stone. They are side-by-side, with just enough space for someone of my size to slip in between them. So I do.

"Hurry, Mara," Urto snaps.

I nod. I have done my best to block my plans and secrets from him. He knows about my tears, although I don't know if he sensed it through my blood in his body, or if he knew about it before. Other secrets I have managed to keep. I don't think he knows about Rasted and Gired or what my blood can do.

Who should I pick first? I take in a deep breath of my wounded males. Will that always be the question with two Fated males?

Belen-cat jumps onto Thane's cairn, purring loudly.

So I choose Thane, too. His worst injury was sustained first and perversely, I want him to speak to me more than anything.

I lean over my male's bruised and battered face. His left eye is still swollen shut, the right closed. His jawline is puffy and his lips are swollen and chapped. His right arm is larger than his left from the swelling.

I find the steady pulse at the base of his throat and lean over.

"Don't drink from there," Urto snarls. He is pacing behind me, the War god heating the very air with his fury.

I ignore him and sink my teeth into Thane's neck. I close my eyes, feeling the warm liquid wash sluggishly over my tongue. If I couldn't see his injuries then his blood would let me know that Thane isn't well. He tastes fevered, his body working desperately to fight off the effects of Urto's rage.

I search deep in my own body. The two drops of Urto's foul blood sit uneasily in my stomach. I gag a little, my body heaving.

"What's wrong?" Urto snaps out.

I pause in my drinking. "He tastes ill," I spit at him accusingly.

"Then you shouldn't drink," he says. "Why make yourself sick?"

"I need to." I resume drinking, the drops of War blood bubbling and gurgling in my gut.

I feel it come up my throat, like a living parasite, wriggling and crawling. I gag again, but try to hide the way my body shudders and quakes as I keep my mouth pressed to Thane's bruised skin.

The first drop slides out and I flick it with my tongue, into one of the two punctures I made in his neck. Pulling away, I exhale in relief. My hands are trembling, so I wrap them in my robes to hide.

I turn to Thelios, ignoring Urto as he growls lowly. "You look pale, worse than before."

"I need both of them," I claim, not caring if Urto can sense the lie. The other drop of War blood is bubbling, just at the back of my throat.

I plunge my teeth into Thelios without a second thought. He feels sicker than Thane. Blood soaks his lower half and he is paler than Erra, but the droplet eases into his body much faster than with his brother.

I pull away quickly, not wanting to drain more blood from him. Thelios can scarcely afford to feed me. He needs all the blood he can have.

"Finished?" Urto is staring at me suspiciously. I wonder if he knows that his blood is gone from me.

"Yes," I murmur.

He grabs my arm, swatting away Lier with a hard hand. I make eye contact with my brother. I want someone to stay with them. I don't want my males to be alone with just my gargoyles.

"I want to see my mother and Poppy," I announce. My Basru bristle toward Urto. The tension between my sworn protectors and the delusion War god is steadily increasing. I try to maintain the peace. The images of Thane and Thelios being torn apart by Urto is fresh in my mind.

"We are going to meet with your father. I'm sure his family is with him."

I remain silent. Urto can call them my father's family all he wants. They're mine, too. I slide my gaze to the bond between Urto and I. The black rope is beginning to curl.

"After," Urto gets closer to me, "I want to try to feed you again. I don't like the scent of their blood in your body."

---

"My daughter!" my father sweeps me into his arms. I inhale the scent of brimstone and oil. It's so different from Urto's scent of woodsmoke and fire. My father smells of home. Thane and Thelios have a similar smell. Urto's scent is all wrong for me.

My father is stroking my hair, his hand slowing down bit by bit. "My daughter..." he says with a smile in his voice. "I didn't know I could be any prouder of how clever you are," he says it so quietly that Urto can't hear.

"You can feel that it's gone?" I ask.

"Yes. And your males should be back on their feet soon," my father sounds pensive.

Suddenly, the god of Death turns to Urto. "I have decided that we will discuss my daughter's supposed crimes today. I assume that in six days you have been able to assess her character?"

A vein in the War god's forehead appears, his eyes are a brighter red. "I have one more day with her-"

"What crimes? I'm not even sure what I've been accused of!" I say hotly.

Urto reaches out and strokes my arm. "Inanji claims that you have raised the undead and tried to damage her bonds and your father claims that you are steadfastly defending souls, not damaging anything."

"Her bonds are the problem," I retort hotly.

Urto chuckles, cupping my cheek and brushing his lips over my very unwilling mouth. "Our bond won't be done away. Get that out of your pretty head."

He looks at my father. "I will swear that Mara did nothing to raise the undead army. I presume you have a punishment for Inanji? Nothing too terrible, she gave me this sweet female." He brushes his lips over my head.

"Why do you think that's possible?" I ask, frustrated.

"I won the Challenge. Inanji removed the bonds with the mortals and gave us our bond."

I pause. Oh.

"You believe that Inanji creates all of Fates bonds?" I ask Urto.

He shrugs. "Yes."

I share a look with my father. Nateos smiles at me. "That is why you are so special, my daughter. You have the power to choose your own Fated male."

"Males," I correct him absently.

I feel Urto's hand fall away from me. "Mara created her Fated bond? How can you say that, Nateos? She is not the goddess of Love."

"I am the goddess of Sorrow and Shadow. All bonds are mine in Death's embrace," I tell him quietly.

"What the fuck does that mean?" Urto snaps. "The bonds between you and those pathetic males are broken!"

I look at my father, who, for once, seems confused. When Belen-cat winds through Urto's feet I take my chance.

I run to the balcony as Urto falls to his ass. Ililie is there a moment later, "Where to, My Lady?" He picks me up and leaps from the balcony, spreading his wings out behind him.

"Fly to the Eastern Gate," I demand breathlessly.

He takes off, faltering just a little when he hears my destination. "The Eastern Gate, My Lady?" he shouts in my ear.

"Yes. I have souls to see."

---

Well, I've been better.

I can hear Thelios moaning and cursing foully only a little distance from where I am laying on what feels like a kitchen slab. Like a chunk of meat, actually.

My tongue feels leaden in my mouth, but at least I can feel it.

"Thane?" Thelios chokes out my name. I grunt softly. Even that small motion hurts.

"Are you alive?"

I grunt again.

"Heee talllkinnng?" I hear one of the gargoyles question my brother's intelligence.

"This fucking hurts like a bitch," Thelios swears under his breath.

I would smile if I could feel my face. At least the pain means we are alive. Alive, and if I remember my odd dream, then our female is the one who saved our lives.

"I can't feel my balls, Thane," Thelios sounds worried. I grunt again. "You think that shit will grow back normally? I mean, Mara needs that function, right? That motherfucker even said it, Mara likes my cock."

My chest rumbles with laughter. That hurts too.

"Mishu, stop poking my dick."

I manage to pry my good eye open. Alnue is sitting on my chest, carefully touching my jaw. Hopefully he's re-aligning it and not doing more damage.

"Thane?"

I grunt.

"I think I feel it in me. Can you... can you feel it too?"

I grunt in affirmation, not that Thelios can tell the difference.

"Mara saved us," he whispers. "We're gods now."