《For His Pleasure》19
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We had enjoyed dinner fine. The subject of our conversation returned to a much more lighthearted one, as we both moved on from previous uncomfortable ones.
As he drove us back to our hotel through the streets of Brussels, soft music from the radio filled the silence. To my surprise, it wasn't an awkward silence.
His mood had remained good, which I thanked a higher power for, but now he had seemed to grow quiet; most likely stuck in his own thoughts.
"Are you regretting not splitting the bill with me?" I decided to start conversation with a small tease, while studying the side of his beautiful face carefully.
"No," he replied simply, no sign of any clearly visible emotion from him as he continued to concentrate on the road in front of us.
"Have I done something wrong?" I sighed, praying his mood wouldn't turn upside down again. It was exhausting how often it changed and how his bad mood was directed at me most of the time.
Ben was quiet. I was beginning to think he wouldn't even answer me, until he did.
"Have you ever lied to me?"
For a short moment my throat clenched and mouth dried, my mind immediately drawing up my ballet story.
"About what would I have lied to you about?" My voice was soft, a part of me very positive now that he knew. I didn't feel comfortable enough to tell him though, especially now.
Once again, his reply took a moment. My gaze was still focused on the side of his face, dark eyes concentrated on driving through the streets lit up with lampposts.
The light stubble along his jaw made his features look even darker, and maybe even dangerous, but at this very moment I didn't feel afraid of him in the least. He might know I had lied about having been studying to be a ballet dancer, God forbid he might even know about my past. Even as we were completely alone together in this car, I didn't feel scared. Anxious, yes, but not scared of him.
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"You can trust me, Sofia," he cleared his throat after telling me this.
Now it was my turn to be quiet for a while. Ben wanted me to open up to him. That definitely meant something; a few things, as a matter of fact.
I decided not to reply, though. Opening up wasn't what came easiest for me. I definitely did need to call Mr Capra Sr as soon as possible, to find out if Ben knew and, if he did, how he knew.
We soon entered the underground parking-lot and Ben parked at a space reserved for whoever was staying at the grandest suite; which happened to be him now.
As we headed towards the elevator, in our comfortable but complete silence, I felt his hand brush along my lower back before settling there gently.
I glanced up at Ben, hoping to find out what he meant by his simple action. His gaze was focused on the elevator doors though, even as he knew I had looked up at him.
If he were anyone else, I would feel uncomfortable with how close to me he was, but somehow I didn't mind it now. A part of me really liked it when Ben was close to me.
"Thank you for tonight," I thanked him gently as we entered the elevator and he pushed the button of the floor I was on.
With his hand still on my lower back very comfortingly did he finally glance down at me and offer me a small smile.
His gaze lingered on me a moment further, as if there was something he really wanted to say. Then his smile faded and he looked away. I frowned and stepped back from him.
This caused his hand to slip from the small of my back, which forced him to look at me again.
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I folded my arms over my chest and tilted my head at him, "something's up."
Ben blinked slowly and leaned back against the side of the elevator to watch me. He mirrored my position and also crossed his arms over his chest.
I couldn't deny how extremely attractive he looked right now, but pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind for the time being.
"Talk to me," my arms slowly fell down to my sides while I carefully pleaded, not wanting him to bottle things up inside just so he'd end up getting frustrated with me again, over his own thoughts.
"Nothing's up, Sofia," he shook his head, seeming yet again so in control and casual.
"Why are you being so quiet, then?" My brows raised challengingly at him.
A small and amused grin tugged at a corner of his lips, "I can't be quiet just for the sake of being quiet?"
"Of course, you can. But there's something on your mind," I explained, knowing he understood exactly what I meant, but chose to infuriatingly dodge the subject.
"There're a lot of things on my mind," he admitted calmly, dark eyes still very much focused on me. He looked undeniably sexy and I had to force myself to keep the physical distance between us.
"Like what?" I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose, "just tell me why you're being so quiet. It's starting to worry me."
If he knew about my past, I just wanted him to tell me straight up. It was unfair for him not to tell me he knew, if he did.
"You really want to know?" Ben unfolded his arms to run a hand through his hair. A lone strand was hanging by the side of his forehead, and I felt a deep urge to brush it behind his ear.
"Yes," I nodded firmly, standing my ground.
The elevator was almost at the floor I had my room on and I wanted him to spit it out now before we both parted for the night.
Ben studied me for a moment, before speaking, "I can't stop thinking about kissing you again."
My eyes widened and lips parted, definitely not having expected him to say that. He scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably and glanced away with a small chuckle.
Before I had a chance to say anything, the elevator dinged and the doors slid open at my floor.
"Let me walk you to your door," Ben stepped out of the elevator while I continued to gape at him.
A million thoughts were racing through my mind, and I had no idea what exactly I should say to something like that.
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