I've never been the dressy type but the rate at which I started wearing things I didn't wear in the past was alarming, courtesy of my best friend Avery. Somehow along the line (after my cast was removed), I had become his pet project. I'd dress up and come out and he'd cluck his tongue like a chicken after assessing my outfit before saying "I cant believe this. Hopeless. Hopeless. Hopeless."

At one point, I had decided to wear what I had worn to that date with Jason in the past and he had literally looked into the sky, pulled his hair —which must have been very painful— and screamed before he then said, like a mother giving up on her child "Have I not tried Nica? Have I not tried to pound all about dressing into your head? You know I have, and I'm not giving up, no matter what."

I knew the reason for his intense dress up sessions. Ever since almighty Keith had declared that I was now worth his time, Avery had chanted Don't give in so easily. Make him beg for it, show him what he's missing, Like a mantra.

While he was brushing my hair, I had asked the question of the year,which had resulted in a legendary eye roll. "Why exactly are we doing this Ave?"

"Because you need to show him want he's missing. You need to make him say I could have been tapping that if I hadn't messed up."

"He already tapped it." I muttered under my breath.

"A drunken moment doesn't count."

"Why are you putting me through all this stress Ave? I thought you like him. I can help you woo him if it will save me from shopping with you all the time."

"Because Sherlock, he likes pussy. And last time I checked, I ain't got one."

"I could give you mine. They did say pussy is pussy everywhere you go." I said in a hopeful voice that made him laugh and kiss my forehead.

"You are cute Nica. But I don't want your man. What I want to do is help you get yours to show he's worth your time, and I know that's what you want isn't it?" I nodded and he continued.

"Nothing good comes easy sweetheart. You have to work for it. This is someone that has acted like you didn't exist for 3 years. You have to show him he's not the boss of you. Which reminds me you have to stop cleaning up after him."

"What? Of course not. He's my husband. If I don't do it who will?" I asked in exasperation.

"You hop when he tells you to and stop when he tells you to. You cook every time because he doesn't like his food refrigerated. He loves it fresh. You dress his bed for him every time. If the ingredients for his beloved fruit juice isn't complete you almost have a fit. If his shirt isn't properly ironed he says it and you immediately do it. If I didn't know you better I'd say you are a masochistic and you derive pleasure from doing all that slavery."

"Am I not supposed to do all that?"

"Yes, you are. But the way you go about it is extreme. It's been pretty much established that he used to do all that just to be mean. But you need to cut it down. You told me he has been doing stuff for himself as of recent. That's good. Think about it this way. Once you start practicing your profession, you won't leave in the middle of surgery just because you have to go and cook for your husband who likes his food fresh or go grocery shopping to get the things he likes in his juice. He's not a baby that needs constant looking after."

He was right, of course he was. But I knew deep down that after being accustomed to doing those things every time, stopping just like that was going to be difficult.

"You help him push you around Nica, and that's not cool. You are his wife not his slave." He said as he used a rubber band to hold my hair together and finally let go. I stood and looked at myself in the mirror.

"What am I dressed up for?"

"School.😑"

"Today is one of those days I'll wear a lab coat throughout since I'm shadowing a doctor."

"Who said you can't look cute while examining animals? Besides you won't wear the lab coat out of the house will you? It's when you get there. The time it will take you to go to your car this morning and cone into the house in the evening is enough to show off to that arrogant sexy beast you are married to."

I chuckled and then hugged him tight before muttering a thank you.

That same evening, I got home dog tired and starving. The way my cats welcomed me, i knew they were hungry. With a meow meow here and a meow meow there, they sent their message loud and clear.

Walking into the kitchen to get their food from the cabinet, I saw Keith sitting at the kitchen table and eating pizza. I didn't think twice about it. I just reached in and took a slice as I said good evening to him.

Was it weird that I just took his pizza without an invitation? Hell yes.

Did I care? Nope. Was too hungry to really think it through.

"Evening Maya...you look nice." He said as he brought his soda bottle close to his lips. I smiled a little and said thank you as I looked at the bottle with so much longing. It was chilled, so it called me. So when he offered the bottle to me, I took it without a second thought.

Handing it back to him, I finally stopped feeling like my stomach wanted to be one with my back and so I poured the cat food into their respective bowls.

"I want to take you out to dinner." He said and I turned to look at him. Did he mean it?

I looked into his eyes to see if there was mockery within those blue depths but when I didn't see any, I nodded. He let out a breath, like someone that had been holding it for a while now.

"So it's almost 6pm now. 7:30pm okay?" He asked and I said okay while he went back to his pizza. In all honesty, Keith was shocking me over and over again. After our episode in my room two weeks ago, he had improved a whole lot.

In as much as everything Avery said in the morning was true, I didn't do most of it anymore because Keith no longer even gave me the opportunity to. He started having his clothes drycleaned, he dressed his bed himself and changed his sheets himself except when I was doing a general laundry day and he had sheets that needed to be changed and some dirty clothes yet to be taken by the drycleaner. All I basically did was cook and clean the house generally.

But the number of times I ended up being backed into a corner and kissed senseless by him made me want to ask the magic question.

Was it all lust? Was he doing that just to get into my pants? Because it all started that day after we had sex the first time almost 3months ago. It made me wonder if he was doing all that just to do it again and again without outrightly telling me to spread my legs for him because somewhere along the line, Keith had started liking how I look. He touched me every time he had the chance to.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when he stood up and approached me with the box. One slice was remaining and he offered it to me and I accepted. Then he leaned in and kissed me. My traitorous body responded and I kissed back before he broke it.

"Don't think too much about it. I'm not going to offer you to the wolves or anything." He said as he grinned and pecked my lips again before walking out of the kitchen. I just stared at his back as the same question echoed in my mind over and over again.

Is it all lust?

*******************

"Why are you doing this?" I asked later that night after the waiter took our orders. He gave me a puzzled look.

"Doing what?"

"Taking me out to dinner, doing all the stuff you never used to do, kissing and touching me every time you can, complementing me. Why? What is your motive?"

"I'm trying to get in your good graces Maya. I told you I want to make this work."

"After three years of treating me like shit?"

"I can't apologise enough for the past three years."

"Apologies aren't really worth anything."

"I know. It doesn't change anything."

"But why do you suddenly want to change things between us? Is it because..because of the s-sex? Because it will hurt more if you revert back to your old ways after getting me to trust you and using me for that and getting tired of me." I honestly said as I teared up a little. Thinking about it already hurt.

"Look Maya. I know I don't deserve you. Hell, you are too good for me, and I know it was the sex that opened my eyes. And I won't lie to you and tell you that I don't always think of having my way with you because I do, all the time. But it's not just sex. It has never been since the day I started wanting you. I feel drawn to you, and that is why I want to make this work. I have been too selfish for so long, and I really want to change things for the better."

I sniffled a little. "So it's not just lust?" And he shook his head in denial as he placed his left hand on mine before squeezing it. I looked at his hand, the light reflected on his wedding band. I looked at my own left hand that was missing it's own band. I hadn't worn my wedding ring since the day I took it off on my way to that birthday dinner with Avery 3 months ago.

I nodded. "Okay...but I'm still not having sex with you anytime soon."

"No problem. I'm willing to wait till then...doesn't mean I won't touch you though. My hands have a mind of their own." He said and that made me chuckle a little. I could work with that.

After dinner, we took a walk down the beach since it wasn't far from the restaurant we went to. We found a spot and sat down to watch the waves.

"So what will you say your greatest flaw is?" He asked and I bit my lip as I thought about it.

"Submissive to a fault. After years of seeking attention and wanting people to like me, I kind of started doing anything anyone wants me to do just to be on their good side."

"Well, I did notice that."

"But deep down, I have this daring side of me that always battles with my submissive side. I think that's really who I am, the type that wants to speak for herself and say no if I don't like something. That side of me feels like bitch slapping me every single time I give in to my submissive side which was born out of years of feeling insecure and inferior."

"I do like that side of you. I've encountered her a couple of times. Being that submissive is a weakness that can always be exploited. I don't like women that submit like that. The only time I want women to submit to me is in bed when we are roleplaying."

If I had been light skinned, I would have blushed at his last statement because for some reason, I imagined us doing what he just said. I then moved the topic back to him by asking him the same question to which his reply kind of chilled me to the bones.

"I don't forgive easily."

We went back and forth with questions until I yawned, indicating how tired I was and it brought an end to the evening.

When I slipped into my bed that night, I really thought about how the night had been and decided that it had been more fun than I had imagined it to ever be.