Sweet whispers right next to me wake me from my heavy sleep, and when I pull one eye open with all the strength I can muster, I'm met with a sight that knocks the air out of my lungs as if it's nothing.

My room is cast in soft light, only illuminating the side of the bed that I'm currently looking at. The rest of the room is still pitch black, which tells me it's not morning yet.

"Here you go," Jo's soft voice -in the tone that she only reserves for Daisy- fills my room once again, and my heart contracts as I watch how she offers Daisy her breast. Daisy on her turn sobs before latching on. I hadn't heard her cry, but I can tell that she did cry to let Jo know she's hungry because her breathing is faster than usual.

Jo's laying on her side, one arm underneath her head and her other wrapping around Daisy as we speak. Daisy's laying against her, and all I can see are her dark hairs and beige romper. She's pulled her legs up and her bum is sticking out, and it brings a smile to my face instantly.

They are beautiful.

As if she feels that I'm awake, Jo tears her eyes away from Daisy and looks at me, an apologetic smile forming her still slightly red lips. Just one look at those damn lips, and every memory of before we fell asleep crashes back as if I'm reliving it all over again.

"I'm sorry we woke you. She's hungry," Jo whispers.

I just nod my head to dismiss her apology, not able to form any words. I can't stop looking at the two of them. They look so fucking cozy in my bed, I don't ever want them to leave.

I want to take in every detail of the sight in front of me. I want to print it in my mind, take a picture of it, tattoo it even, so I can always take it with me. So I'll always know what feeling utterly at peace looks like.

So I know what love looks like.

"Do you need me to put down the light?" Jo frowns, and when I focus on her face instead of the whole image in front of me, I see that she's pulled her lip between her teeth.

"What? No, why?"

Her frown disappears, but she still looks doubtful. "You're not blinking. I thought that maybe the light's bothering you."

"Oh," I stretch, blinking my eyes repeatedly and very obviously. "No the light isn't bothering me."

"Okay," she whispers, still looking somewhat confused while she casts her eyes down to look at Daisy again.

"I just like this," I explain, not wanting her to dwell on the thoughts of why I was looking at her that intently. "Waking up and finding you next to me."

Her eyes stay on Daisy, but I can see her lips form into a small smile while her cheeks color slightly. Her hand trails from Daisy's back to her head where she starts stroking the soft brown hairs. "I like waking up here."

A comfortable silence falls between us as I smile at her response. And for a second, I try to ignore the need to touch her, just her cheek or her hair, just because I want to feel closer to her. But then I remember that I've told her I love her. That she loves me.

Her eyes meet mine at the same time as my hand moves for her cheek. She sees it coming, yet she doesn't flinch; she just gives me a small smile. A sweet smile that's almost giddy.

When my hand comes into contact with her cheek, her eyes flutter closed and for a moment I see how she enjoys my touch. For just a moment, she lets her guard down and loses her thoughts completely, and just feels. I've only witnessed her do that three times, and to my utter joy, it's every time either my lips or now my hand are on her.

Her eyes slowly open when I move her blond hair behind her ear before following the shell of her ear with my fingers. "Is this okay?" I ask her when I squeeze her lobe in between my finger and thumb.

She nods, a sigh leaving her lips. "I like it."

I smile and trail my hand down, over her shoulder until I arrive at her waist. I squeeze once and then scoot closer so my nose is inches from hers and Daisy is squeezed in the middle of us, her bum that stuck out now pressed against my shirt-covered chest.

"Hello," I mumble while rubbing my nose against hers which makes her giggle once again. It seems to be a returning reaction when I bump my nose against hers, and it makes me smile as well.

"Hi," she whispers. I look at Daisy, who is drinking with her eyes closed. Her hand lies on the swell of Jo's breast and is folded in a fist. Her breathing goes a little faster and if I listen carefully, I can hear her swallow the gulps of milk.

"She was hungry," I observe, referring to Daisy's eager tugs.

"She was," Jo responds. "But I can feel she's already falling asleep again."

"Maybe she just needed to be close to you for a bit," I whisper before leaning down and kissing the soft brown hairs on top of Daisy's head.

Jo nods but stays silent. The small smile around her lips is still present as she follows me with her eyes. I'm enjoying it. I'm enjoying how she lets me kiss Daisy's head while she's drinking. She didn't flinch and lets me come that close while she's vulnerable like that.

"I can't believe she smiled." Jo's whisper breaks the silence, and I scan her face to read her emotion. She doesn't seem mad about it; she's smiling, but her eyes might show a hint of jealousy.

I slide my hand back up and place it on her cheek, wiping her hair back once more. "I'm pretty sure she didn't even notice it. It was just a reflex."

"Yeah, but still," she mumbles. "I've never seen her smile."

I lean forward and kiss her forehead. "You will. You will get her first real smile. I know it. This was just her mouth pulling up slightly, nothing big."

She pulls up her nose and lets out a soft giggle, her light frown disappearing. "It's really sweet how you try to make me feel better about me not having her first smile."

I shrug and chuckle. I hadn't even noticed that I was doing that, to be honest. I'm literally telling her what I think. "You will have her first smile, don't worry," I repeat.

Silence falls between us again. My hand lies on her cheek still, my thumb moving along her cheekbone. Her long lashes are cast down as she looks at her daughter, and when she hisses I look down as well.

Daisy's not drinking anymore; she's completely out. Jo's engorged, dark-pink nipple is pointing towards her mouth still, a drop of milk hanging on the tip.

And it's not fucking normal, but my mouth is watering. What kind of fucking perv am I?

"Does it hurt?" I ask before I can stop myself, and I immediately wish I could swallow the words back in.

"What?" Jo asks. I'm not looking at her. My eyes are still cast on her breast, but I'm hoping that Jo thinks I'm looking at Daisy because what the fuck is wrong with me?

When I feel my body react to what I'm seeing, I scoot back to create some much-needed distance between us at the same time as my eyes find her face. She frowns at my sudden movement, her eyes scanning my face as if to discover what's wrong. ''Does what hurt?" She presses when I still haven't answered.

She doesn't want to know.

"I... I mean you hissed and I thought..."

"Oh," she interrupts, unknowingly helping me out of my misery. "She just sucked a little hard but pulled back. It felt uncomfortable. I'm okay."

I nod and at the same time as she pulls down her shirt, still completely unaware of the effect she has on me or my current rilled-up state. That's one of the things that I find absolutely remarkable about her, to be honest; I'm panting like a puppy begging to be petted when she's near, yet she has no idea what kind of effect she has on me.

"I'm going to bring her back to bed," Jo says as she lifts herself from the bed carefully before taking Daisy from my bed as well.

I want to tell her not to do it. I want them here, both of them, but I have no idea if she's comfortable with that, so instead of asking her to let Daisy sleep here too, I ask, "will you come back?"

For a split second, I see relief wash over her face. "Yes. I'll come back."

I watch her leave my room with a smile on my face before I turn on my back and take a deep tug of air while I will my body to calm down. Seriously, calm down. I rub my hands over my face, hoping to rub out the image of Jo's full breast. Of her dark pink nipple with a dribble of milk still-

Fuck sakes. This isn't working.

I throw my duvet on the floor and walk to the bathroom, thankfully not crossing Jo on my way through. I hear her from behind the door of their room; she's talking to Daisy, so I think she's woken up and now Jo is trying to get her back to sleep. It's perfect really, because it offers me some time.

I lock the door behind me and switch in the light before walking to the sink. I turn open the tab, and throw some of the cold water in my face, hoping that it will both erase the image of Jo's beast and tame my raging cock. It feels refreshing, but it doesn't do the trick.

"Goddamnit," I hiss under my breath while closing the tap. I know my body, and I know that there is only one way I'm able to step back in bed without scaring the shit out of Jo.

I look in the mirror and meet my reflection. "You're a sick fuck," I tell him, before leaning against the wall to my right and moving my hand south.

I haven't had sex in almost a month. I haven't wanked since I found Jo on that wooden floor. I honestly hadn't missed it until I first kissed Jo. But when I tasted her lips, my body went into overdrive.

I can't help it. Before I met her, I had a healthy sex life. I had nothing to complain about; no commitment, just fun which worked for both involved parties. But now that I've met her, and given the recent changes and sudden feelings, I know that my life will change drastically.

Every part of my life, including my sex life.

And I'm okay with that. I'm okay with that because it gives me Jo and Daisy in return. But fuck, I'm still only human.

The moment my hand finds its target, a rush of relief shoots through my body. This will help. It will help to release the tension somewhat. It will make me feel more at ease around Jo. I want that because the last thing I want is Jo to notice anything that could send her into straight panic.

And I try, I try with all my fucking might, not to think about her while my hand gets to work. I try to envision anyone but her, but it's useless. From the moment I've met her, she's occupying my mind, and from me moment she kissed me she has my heart. From the moment she told me she loves me, she owns me. And right now, I can't help but see her while I slump against the tiles as I take in the movements of my hand.

I can't stop it. I can't stop her. But right now, I just pretend that it's not as inappropriate because it's only my imagination. An imagination of which Jo will never feel any harm.

After ten minutes, I return to my bedroom and my heart swells when I find Jo already underneath my duvet. She's laying with her face towards me, and the moment I step into the room, her head lifts slightly.

"Are you okay?" She asks, her expression worried.

I step into bed and lay on my side as well so I'm facing her. "Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry."

She nods. I can tell she wants to ask more, but thankfully she doesn't. Instead, she mumbles a soft, "okay," before she turns and switches off the light on the bedside table.

Five minutes we just lay still in the pitch-black room. We don't talk, and all I hear is our breathing, mine still slightly uncontrolled and hers seemingly normal.

"Jo," I mumble into the dark before holding my breath to hear her response.

"Mmhmm?" I hear her shift, and I think she has turned to face me again but I can't say for sure.

"Come here?" Even though I desperately want her close, I still manage to get my demand out as a question. For a moment there is no response and she doesn't move either. But just as her name lies on my lips to ask her again, I feel the bed dip beside me.

I stretch my arm and meet the fabric of her shirt which gives me an idea of how she lies beside me. Therefore, I'm able to pull her against me by her waist, and not a second later I feel her nose in my neck.

"Your heart is racing," she mumbles against my skin, which sends a shock through my spine. Thank fuck, I've lost some of the tension.

I swallow heavily and nod my head. "I know. That's you. I like it though."

Her hands find my chest and she nuzzles a little further into me. She doesn't respond, she just lies in my arms. I feel her relax, and it allows me to settle into the mattress properly as well.

"I'm nervous for tomorrow." Her hand fists my shirt, and in response, I pull her against me even tighter. I kiss her head, hoping that it will give the words I'm about to say more power.

"It'll be okay. You're strong. And you don't have to talk about anything that you don't want them to know."

I feel her nod against my chest before she bends her neck so she's looking up at me. Although I can't see her, I can feel it, as her breath skims my chin.

"You keep telling me I'm strong, but I feel the complete opposite. How can you think I'm strong after what happened? How can you think I'm strong when I couldn't fight them? While I didn't escape?" I can hear her voice crack, and I wish I could see her, but moving to turn on the light isn't an option since I can't let her go. Not now. I don't want to pull away from the way I'm holding her.

I don't know what to tell her. I know she is strong, but given what she's just told me, she will never just believe me on my word, no matter how many times I'll repeat them. It's once again a sign that she needs help beyond the help that I'm offering her, and I'm fucking relieved that she will get that help, starting tomorrow.

"I know you won't believe me, but you are strong. And I know that in a few years, you'll see it too. You fought, Jo. Every day you fought for yourself and Daisy. And you survived. You survived because you fought and never gave up. And even now, while you haven't found any peace just yet, you continue to fight. You're fighting for Daisy. That makes you my hero, Jo. I'm in awe of you and your strength." I end my rant with another kiss. This time I aim for her forehead, but since I can't make out her face I end up kissing half her eyelid and eyebrow. It's okay though, because Jo giggles through her sobs, which tells me that it's easing the tension somewhat.

"And I'll be there. Me and Dias will bring you, and we will be there when you walk out as well. You're not alone. You'll never be alone, okay?"

I feel her nose move up and down against my lips, telling me that she's nodding her head. "Thank you for being there," she mumbles, and just after I feel her nose against my mouth again.

This time it's pressing against my lips for a second before she trails it up until her mouth has found mine. She's kissing me, again. And this time I didn't see it coming.

It feels as if this time, she isn't kissing me as a thank you or because she needs to feel something. She is kissing me because she wants to kiss me, and I might be imagining it, but she feels more determined and sure of what she is doing.

She's is the one that starts to part her lips, and her tongue is the one that asks my mouth for entrance. When I open my mouth, she is the one that sets the pace and circles her tongue around mine first.

She initiates the whole kiss. The pace, the way we kiss, and how long we kiss. Her arms have found their way around my neck, and her fingers are moving through the strands of hair on top of my head. The only thing that I've done, is wrap my arms around her tighter and pulled her as close to me as possible.

I don't know how long we kiss like that. I'm completely in the moment with her, and nothing else matters. We make out in a way that I haven't done since I was a teenager, and even back then I doubt if I ever kissed someone like this.

It's gentle; the need between us goes way beyond the usual lust. It's intimate and sweet. It's a little awkward because of her lack of experience and my uncertainty of what not to do and what definitely to do. But it's a kiss that suits us.

It's a kiss that I feel through and through, not just in certain areas. Although, those certain areas have decided to fuck me over and tell me that one wank was not enough by far.

She must feel it. She must, since she's pressed flush against me. But up until now, she hasn't reacted. She isn't flinching away, but she isn't giving it any attention either. She's just kissing me, her tongue sometimes trying something new and her lips exploring, but never going off course.

And eventually, she is the one that pulls away and ends the kiss as well. She is the one that, with heavy breathing and no doubt swollen lips, pulls back and moves her finger to my mouth to wipe over them. It's an erotic action, an unexpected one too, but I savor the feel of it.

We don't speak any further. We're both panting. She's shivering against me once in a while, and I can tell we're both warm. I feel that her shirt is clammy, and I know that mine is too, but we ignore it.

We just lay, her in my arms, her hands again on my chest, and I concentrate on her breathing which eventually turns into a steady movement that relaxes me to the bone.

My hand moves up and down her back on its own accord, and only when I'm a thousand percent sure that she is deeply asleep, I allow my eyes to fall shut as well.

And with her taste still on my tongue, sleep consumes me just a few minutes later, with the last thing I feel Jo who is cuddling against me closer once more.

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