The warm soft breeze wove through my loose curly strands, as they floated behind me. Hopes hair was in a neat pony tail, yet she still had clumps of hair slapping her in the face. Her tiny little lips were pressed together to blow away the strays in her mouth. She made an unattractive noise, it almost sounded similar to blowing a raspberry, as her face scrunched up in disgust. She earnt an amused look from me, and even a tiny laugh as I selfishly watched her try to overcome the wind. Eventually, I pulled the strands away from her face. She rewarded me with a huge, vibrant smile – eyes squinting as she attempted to look up at me – as well as a "Thank you mommy" from her sweet like candy voice.

Unashamedly I'd matched us in similar clothing: she had a pink, halter neck sun dress with jelly white sandals, while I had a lowcut pink sun dress on also with white sandals; only difference was the material of our shoes as mine had a leather strap crossing the middle, and my dress was slightly darker than hers. Nevertheless, she looked cute and I looked stylish. Unfortunately there was still a breeze lingering, causing my dress to betray me by showing the whole world my knickers. Really not cool. So I was fighting a losing battle of looking casual – or even normal – as we walked hand in hand down the street with my free hand jumping every few seconds to grab the hem. Unsurprisingly Hope felt the situation was hilarious. Her tiny body jiggled as she released a ginormous giggle from her belly, while her eyes were almost drowning in uncontrollable tears. Still the sweet sound of her giggle left me laughing too, despite how much I wanted to crawl into the next drain after the innocent old lady passing had just almost witnessed under my dress. My arm flinched to instantly keep it in place, almost elbowing the poor woman. "Sorry" I muttered – more to the floor than to her – as her face morphed into disgust. Luckily we had arrived at the tiny little coffee shop from the other day.

'Brandy's bakes' was the name in black cursive writing against a baby pink background. It had the pretty circular logo on each of the three windows down the side of the shop. It smelt like heaven from outside the door, hypnotising me into a magical land full of cakes and coffee. Tugging on the glass door, allowing Hope to enter first, I scanned the room for Nate. It took me roughly two point five seconds for my eyes to reach their destination, instantly locking with a pair of alluring, icy blue, irises. My body felt like it was being hypnotised, I couldn't think, my mind had fell empty, apart from all thoughts Nate – and Hope of course, my mind hadn't become completely unaware of my surroundings. I just wasn't interested in anything else. All the aromas sweeping past my nose from the freshly baked chocolate Eclairs, or doughnuts, as well as the strong sweet smell of the caramel latte I was desperate to order, had vanished. The only thing I craved now was Nate. I wanted the taste of his sweet, soft lips; the aroma of his masculine scent; and the heat from his touch. He was my own personal caramel latte that I wanted to drink up a thousand times a day. All day, every day.

I noticed he was wearing a causal attire of tight fitting denim shorts, as a consequence of the weather giving me full eye candy of his muscular toned legs, styled with a navy blue t-shirt which matched his eyes perfectly, despite being a little darker. I wasn't ashamed to stare, he was gorgeous. His whole body was perfectly sculpted like it was personally made for me. His hair was dishevelled, but it made him look handsome. It didn't look messy like he'd just got out of bed, but more like it was naturally like this.

Leading Hope over to the small, circular, wooden table occupied by three chairs, I noticed the extra two drinks waiting on the table. They could be considered friends the way they sat over the other side next to each other. An orange juice was pouted into a plastic cup for Hope, and a caramel latte, in its designated cup, for me. The smile that grew contradicted all my thoughts about him buying me a drink. I liked the independence of purchasing my own things, as Robert took control over that too when we were together, so despite how romantic this way, I was still shocked to see me smile at the sight of it. Maybe I was finally accepting my fears? Slowly but eventually.

"Hi" all of a sudden I sounded nervous, shy and sheepish. I was even gripping Hopes hand a little too tight in anticipation for what he would say next. Amongst all the wonderful thoughts, and excitement of being here, I'd allowed myself to forget the embarrassing breakdown I'd endured last night in front of him. cringing at the mental image I'd formed in my head of what I must of looked like from his angle, I hoped he wouldn't remember too. Only that was ridiculous, unless he'd bumped his head and grown amnesia this second, there was no way he was forgetting last night.

"Hi, I got you both a drink. I remembered from the day we met. I got it right?" He started off sounding confident, until he worried he got the drinks wrong making me giggle.

"Yes, you got it right. Thank you"

He beamed back at me, then engaged with Hope. Something that made my heart beam as much as his face right now.

"Hey Hope. Look what I got you!"

Her mouth widened to its full capacity, along with her sapphires. You could see her pretty, thick lashes spread out around her eyes as she gasped in excitement.

"Thank you Nate" she hugged him, and wisely chose the seat next to him so I could sit the other side of him.

For a two year old, Hope was pretty confident and clever. Most of the time people presumed she already three, maybe even four, despite her tiny height. I loved knowing she'd turned out so well considering half of her genes, but it always scared me how comfortable she got with people. Initially she would be shy, but afterwards she would become besotted. Her teacher informed me that it could be because of the lack of father and extended family in her life. I also feared this as I was in the same occupation so was aware of all these issues.

"So, how are you?" Small talk made me queasy. It made me think there was an underlying problem that the person couldn't get to without fear of upsetting the other.

"I'm good. You can just come out with it Nate" I said it nicely. Quietly even. Truth is, as much as I don't want him to beat around the bush, I'd rather him just ask what he needs to ask.

"I'm sorry I just feel really awful for scaring you" he rubbed the back of his neck, and I winced at his words. I couldn't do this anymore. I needed to tell him, but how?

"Nate you didn't do anything, there's... things you don't know" I took a breath before I finished, shutting my eyes at the thought of telling him.

"You can tell me" he exhaled then said, "I really like you Daisy. I haven't dated for years, but something about you captivated me" I saw him swallow, as he took his eyes off me. Something was obviously difficult for him too, a part of his life that really hurt him – maybe even broke him? my chest clenched at the thought of someone hurting a guy like Nate; he was sweet, kind, a caring man that didn't deserve that. Just like he didn't deserve being lied to, or being kept in the dark about my problems when he was displaying his feelings for me like a cake on the counter behind me; sweet, and exciting. Therefore, by giving him those same words back, as well as the truth, was like biting into that sweet cake, eating it, and indulging in all its flavours; it's what I needed to do. I wanted to tell him everything, give him that attention back that he deserved, and indulge in all his flavours. Taste everything about him. I greedily craved his heart, his body, his affection, and I wanted to share his life with him. Okay maybe I sounded a little obsessive, but he had really captivated me.

"I just basically really want you. I want to take this further, involve Hope in things too, and show you how much you deserve. Something tells me you've not been shown that, and that frustrates me. You both deserve everything."

Wow. I knew this would be intense after last night, but this was beyond what I expected; the complete opposite of what I thought. I was seriously worried he was going to want to take things even slower, or even not see me again. Instead he wants to continue what we're doing, and more. And despite all my fears of meeting someone, committing and trusting someone again, I had never been so excited to date someone.

"Thank you."

"why are you thanking me?" he laughed a little, while smiling up at me with happiness I sensed was from having me here. It was the way he looked at me. The warmth in his eyes, and the relaxed facial expression.

"You're just so sweet" I shook my head laughing at myself.

"I really like you too, Nate" now I was looking into his eyes, while breathing heavy, fingers shaky, from my confession. Maybe it made it easier because he'd already said it to me, but this was still a milestone for me. To actually attempt dating someone, and then telling them how I felt was massive. I secretly felt proud of myself, and relieved that Robert hadn't taken over this part of my life like I thought he initially had. Instead, I'd overcome it. Well, slightly. I still had a long way to go with this man, and I'm sure it would be a while until we got under the sheets.

His reaction was a simple, but sexy peck on the cheek. I appreciated his thoughts towards Hope.

"This thing I have to tell you. Just please give me time? It's not that I don't trust to tell you, its just hard to talk about. You've seen the way I react over little things, so talking about this will be harder, Nate" I smiled sadly at him, hoping he would be okay with waiting. As much as I wanted to tell him now, I just needed to come to terms with how to even interpret it into words. I was going to take Mandy up on her opinion for me to do counselling.

"I understand."

"and please stop blaming yourself for last night, or the other week at the bar. You didn't do anything wrong."

"But I sc"

"No. You didn't scare me. Not in the way you think. Its complicated okay? Soon it will all make sense" I was desperate for him to understand, and you could hear it in my voice.

"Okay. I'm still going to feel a little bad though because I care about you" He shrugged.

Stubborn man. I suppose I'm not going to win this, so I just giggled shaking my head in disbelief.

"Mommy can I use the bathroom please? I need to go quickly" Hope started squirming like a worm, shifting in her seat. Toilet training was becoming so stressful, I couldn't wait for her to be confident enough where there wasn't fear of an accident. I took her to the bathroom, and I noticed Nate pulling the barista over indicating for more drinks.

He was too sweet.