Flashback

Rhea laid lazily on the couch, her shoes off as she flicked through a magazine.

She heard the door open and looked up to see Ryder come in, loosening his tie.

"What you cooking?" He asked as he sat next to Rhea.

"Italian chicken casserole." Rhea answered as Ryder kissed her hand.

"What are you reading?"

"Something I picked up from the centre." Rhea closed the magazine and read the title. "Soul."

She flipped through the pages until she found where she was. "If you could drive just one car for the rest of your life, what would that be?"

Ryder frowned at his wife.

"It's just random questions, to get to know each other a bit better."

"I know you well enough." Ryder told her.

"Come on, babe. Just do it." She pleaded.

"1972 Chrysler Charger."

"The one you bought for me." Rhea smiled as she went to another question. "Describe to me your ideal day."

Ryder looked darkly at Rhea as she saw the lust in his eyes.

"Moving on," She smiled shyly. "What is your favourite part of our marriage?"

Ryder grinned. "You should go first."

"You walking in from that door." Rhea pointed to the front door.

"Waking up next to you." Ryder said as he took the magazine off her and climbed on top, kissing her neck.

"How did you know I was -" Rhea went to ask, but Ryder cut her off.

"Baby, you are my wife, and when I said till death us do part, I mean it. We have the rest of our lives to find new stuff about us. Otherwise, where is the mystery?"

Rhea smiled as she kissed Ryder. "You're right."

"Stop playing the wise doctor." Ryder teased, making Rhea giggle.

Now

I heard a constant beeping. It was annoying and irritating.

I felt groggy, my pain dulled, not as bad as I felt earlier. Maybe I can open my eyes now, I feel like I've tried this before.

It didn't hurt to breathe, my head wasn't banging. I felt sadness overcome me. I slowly opened my eyes, the room was dimly lit.

It slowly came back to me. Rowan was missing. I was taken. I was beaten. Ryder found me. Then people, other people.

They said bodies. That was plural. That means people who are dead. My eyes weren't as swollen as I felt the tears ran down my face.

Ryder.

Ryder was killed. By his own brother. It didn't matter if they were adopted or not. They were raised as brothers. They grew up together as brothers.

Where is Rowan? Ryder said he was safe, but he didn't tell me where. I want my baby.

I kept still as the sadness swallowed me up. I let out a silent sob and my hand went to my mouth. I don't know where Rowan is. I lost my true love.

Why did all this have to happen? I turned my head to the side as I looked at my hand. It had a patch on the wrist, a cannula attached as well.

I turned to my other wrist and that's when I noticed someone was holding it. I couldn't make it out completely, but I saw dark long hair, their head down and on the mattress.

I licked my lips, feeling a small sore on it. How long have I been in here?

I tried taking my hand that was being held captive, but I stirred the person sleeping. They sat up, moaning and I watched as they rubbed their face, a smile on mine before I bursted out in tears.

"Gabriel!" I cried out.

She looked at me, surprise in her eyes. "You're awake!" She smiled, as she sat up. "Finally!"

"Oh Gabriel! It was awful!"

She squeezed my hand. "I know. I know." She comforted me.

"Where is Rowan?" I asked her. "I want to see my son. I haven't seen him since..."

"A month ago." Gabriel said, making my eyes widen.

"A month?" I gasped.

Gabriel nodded, biting her bottom lip. "It's okay." She soothed. "He is fine. He is with Sasha. She brings him up every morning."

I felt relieved. "Thank you." I sighed as more tears formed.

"At least you're awake. They had to put you in an induced coma. They did an exploratory surgery, but everything is fine now." She smiled as I saw the glistening of tears run down her face.

"How long was I missing?" I suddenly asked.

"Four days. I got a phone call on day two and flew straight out here."

"Rowan was with you?"

Gabriel nodded. "He misses you. He just wanted you to wake up." She said softly.

"I miss him." I sighed.

"You will see him, soon."

I just nodded. My heart clenched and I felt like I was suffocating. But I had to know. I need to know. "Ryder."

Gabriel looked at me, a grim look on her face. "You concentrate on getting better, for yourself and for Rowan."

****

It's been nearly a week and I was off everything. The morphine stopped weeks ago, when I started healing when I was in the coma.

I was eating food, drinking water and spent every second I had with Rowan, holding him, brushing his hair, smelling him and kissing him.

But it was the lonely moments I had that were rare, but I still had, I cried.

I was finally released from the hospital and Gabriel drove us to a small house, with next to no neighbours. The place looked peaceful with the setting sun behind us.

"Where are we?" I asked as I looked over to Rowan, who was asleep in the car seat.

Gabriel stopped the car and sighed. "It's where Ryder set me up with Rowan. Before he went looking for you."

I didn't say anything else. I couldn't. I was in emotional pain.

Gabriel helped with Rowan as she led us inside, opening the door. It was fully decorated, furniture every where. I liked the privacy of it all.

"What about Rowan's school?" I asked Gabriel as she gently placed Rowan on the couch.

"Ryder took him out." She said flatly. "Your job, uh, is fine. Your boss, Jan? I spoke to her the other week."

"Luke?" I asked, a bit guilty. "I broke up with him the same day as everything happened. Well, before it happened."

Gabriel nodded. "Jan said she will talk to him." She pursed her lips together. "I've slowly been bringing your personal stuff over, out from your place."

I could tell she was choking up about this. I went to her and gave her a tight hug as she returned it, crying.

"I thought I lost you." She whimpered to me. "I was so scared."

"Me too."

I held her a bit longer before stepping away. "Thank you. For everything."

"Well, I'm gonna go, unless you want me to stay. The whole place is secured. Alarms, motion sensors, security."

"Where are you going?" I asked her.

"I've been back for a month and I need to go. I have to see my parents." Gabriel wiped the tears away.

I nodded again.

"There are clothes, food, money. Oh, yeah." She disappeared from the room and returned, holding a folder.

"It was a precautionary, Ryder told me about, before... Everything you need is there." She gave me the folder.

I hugged Gabriel again.

"Thank you."

She smiled at me, wiping her face. "It's not goodbye." She made out, making us both laugh. "I'll be back tomorrow. I'll give you some time with Rowan."

I watched as Gabriel stepped out the door and to the car as I closed the door. I went to the empty couch and sat, holding on to the folder.

The whole time I was awake in the hospital, I didn't get a visit from Michelle or Arnold. But I didn't blame them. I'm the reason both of their sons are dead.

I had it confirmed to me that Vincent is dead. He shot Ryder, forcing the police to shoot him. Killed instantly.

But everyone I asked about Ryder, I never got a straight answer.

I opened the envelope and peeked inside.

Credit cards, key cards, the deed to his places, the ownership to the companies, his account details, his will.

I suppressed a sob. This is real. All too real.

I pulled out the last piece of paper. I unfolded it and read it.

I was wrong, it's not till death us do part. Look after Rowan. For both of us. I'll wait for you when your time comes, not a second earlier.

I always have loved you, six years ago, four years ago, now.

Follow your advice and live.

Stop hiding in the Advice column.

I'm sorry I'm not here.

I love you.

I couldn't hold back any more. I openly cried for what I had lost. Ryder's gone. He has been for over three weeks.

I read what I could, trying to make sense off the whole situation. Two months ago, I was a single mother, working full time, caring for Rowan. Then Ryder reappeared in my life, I had Luke, there was Ashley and all three were fighting for me. Now it's just Rowan and me again. In this strange place.

I put everything back in the folder to deal with another day, when I'm mentally stronger again.

The room darkened even more as the sun fully set. I'm alone again. In this big world, all alone.

Once I calmed down from the crying, I had no appetite, I carried Rowan to the master bedroom and laid him there, cuddling in to him, silently crying myself to sleep.

****

I wasn't sleeping properly. Just like every other night. Every noise had me jolting up, my eyes wide awake, looking around me. I climbed off the bed, trying not to disturb Rowan as I went to the window and looked out. I saw the lightening in the distance and swallowed. Please don't come this way.

I checked the time, it was barely past ten at night.

Maybe I should have asked Gabriel to stay. But I also thought it weird for her to be the way she was. I knew she was scared, I felt it. But I also felt she was hiding something.

I saw another streak of lightning and a small shudder came over me. The last storm I had to endure, I didn't have my coping mechanisms, my head phones. But Ryder was there instead.

Ryder...

I was in a strange house, beautifully decorated. Gabriel said it was where Ryder put her with Rowan.

I went to find my way to the kitchen for a drink and after turning the light on, I found a coffee mug and filled that with water from the tap. Placing the mug on the sink, I noticed there were dry dishes on the rack. Maybe from Gabriel yesterday?

I turned the kitchen light off, staying on the spot. I felt empty and I didn't like that. I saw car head lights in the distance, lighting up the room.

My heart raced as I went to the window. I didn't move the lace curtain out off the way, as I gently felt the dishes for something like...

I gripped my fingers around it.

A cast iron pan.

Perfect.

I heard a car door close. The lights faded away. The crunch of footsteps. I leaned against the fridge, ready for whoever it was.

Didn't Gabriel say the place had motion sensors? I stayed up against the fridge, my arms wide like I had a softball bat, waiting. I didn't go through hell just for it to happen again. I won't accept that.

I heard the door open and I saw a shadow. I held my breathe, with widened eyes, trying to keep my focus on the shadow. It's too tall and broad to be Gabriel.

The shadow came closer and I hoped I couldn't be seen.

Another step, I could hear a hand feeling the wall. My heart was racing when I stepped out, screaming, all my energy and strength in my arms as I swung the cast iron pan.

But it didn't hit anyone. In fact, someone stopped me, holding the pan. I tried reclaiming it back but I managed to lose my grip, stepping back. I went back to the sink, picking up the first thing my hand landed on, throwing it.

I heard it hit its target before smashing on the ground.

"Wait!" I heard someone call out but I didn't pay any heed to it as I picked something else up.

I heard the fumbling around made by the other person as I was panting, throwing what I had and missed, smashing behind them.

The light flicked on and I squinted against the light, turning my head away as I felt for something else to grab.

I turned to them, hand high, ready to launch, when the item I was holding dropped to the floor, smashing by my feet.

I saw him. Clear as day. Right in front of me.

"Ryder?" I croaked out and then my knees went weak and I blacked out.