"I told you we shouldn't have went to that doctor's appointment yesterday!" Chanel yells at me.

"No, you shouldn't have went!! I didn't want you there and neither did Milani or Brandon! I begged you not to come with me, but your annoying ass wouldn't take no for an answer! All you got was an ass whooping!"

"Looks like you got one too."

"Why the hell you still here anyway!?" I say as I slam my hand down on the table, making the glasses shake.

Pulling out my phone, I decide to check Milani's location and see that she's stopped sharing it with me which makes me more upset. The noise from Chanel's voice also triggers me so I pick up a plate, throwing it into the wall then watch it shatter onto the floor.

"Are you fucking crazy!?! Drummer, that almost hit me!!" Chanel screams and I sigh, rubbing my temples.

"Chanel, I wish you'd get yo shit and go. Milani told you that you could stay here, but she left. You need to do the same!!!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!" Tae yells loudly as he comes out of his room. "It's both of y'all's fault! Chanel, you shouldn't have gotten drunk and tried to fuck him. Drummer, you shouldn't have let her leave. While ya'll busy arguing she's probably getting ready to leave. Did y'all notice that most of her shit is gone?"

"Jontaevious, what the hell you talking bout? Where she going?? You ain't making no sense and it's pissing me off."

"While y'all was sleeping, Milani came over here earlier this morning and I helped her get her stuff. She's moving to Vegas with her sister and her flight finna leave in like 20 minutes." He shrugs and I walk over to him, snatching him by his collar.

"She was here and you didn't tell me!? And you supposed to be my blood! How the fuck you let this happen?"

"Nigga, you let this happen. The time you spending roughing me up, you could've been halfway to the airport by now." Tae tells me and I realize he's right, letting him go and grabbing my keys.

"I wanna g.." Chanel says grabbing her shoes. "FUCK NO! You ain't going!" I say as I run towards the door.

"I hope she's gone by the time you make it, D. She's a good girl and you're ruining her!! Just let her go!!" Tae yells out and I stick up my middle finger then get into my car and speed off.

As I'm driving towards the airport, I repeatedly call Milani's phone and get no answer so I call Brandon; praying that he answers.

"Aye, don't hang up." I say when he finally answers the phone. "You know where Milani at?"

"Nah and if I did, I wouldn't tell you."

"B, STOP FUCKING PLAYING!! She tryna leave me!! She taking my kid away from me!"

I hear shuffling on the phone then hear Milani's voice on the other side. "Drummer, why won't you just leave me alone? I'm trying to get away from you."

"Baby, I know you ain't tryna hear nothing I gotta say right now, but please listen. I love you with everything in me and I apologize for making you feel like this. I told you I wasn't about to fuck her. She was all over me and I was finna try to get her off gently so I wouldn't hurt her. I will do anything to get you back. Please, even if you don't ever wanna be with me again, stay here. Don't take my seed away from me, please, Milani. I'm begging you." I sob into the phone, my salty tears running down my face and into my mouth.

"Drummer, there's no hard feelings between us. Brandon made me realize that I shouldn't be mad at you, only at Chanel. I just need a break from it all. I've got to deal with the fact that my best friend betrayed me. I can't even look at you the same knowing she was all up on you. It'll take some time to get over that then maybe I'll consider talking to you again, but as for now, I'm doing what's best for me and my baby."

"How much time you need, baby? So are we just taking a break or are you breaking up with me? At least let me see you before you leave."

Pulling up to the airport, I run inside and look around, trying to find Milani.

"I don't know how much time I'll need. Drummer, I'm breaking up with you. If it makes you feel better, I'll share my location with you once I'm long gone. I don't wanna see you. I love you, bye."

I try to tell her that I love her, but she has already hung up the phone. Running up to the desk, I ask about the most recent flight to Vegas.

"I'm sorry, sir. That plane just took off." She says with a soft smile.

"You just gone have to charge it to the game and take yo L. Ain't that what you told me? Now lookatcha, done fucked up, lost yo woman and unborn. All because you fucked up me and Chanel's relationship." Brandon says as he walks pass me, bumping my shoulder.

Taking a deep breath, I realize that he's not worth my energy at the moment so I go back to my car then drive straight home; Chanel and Tae waiting for me on the couch. Both of their eyes are wide, hoping that Milani is back.

"What happened?" Chanel asks me with tears in her eyes.

"You fucking happened! You fucked up everybody's lives and now you wanna act like you sorry. Bitch, you ain't sorry. You probably planned this shit!"

"Drummer, come on now, don't be calling her outta her name. Chanel told me the whole story and truth be told, it's yo fault. You meddled in Chanel and Brandon's relationship and it caused a domino effect. You ain't got nobody to blame for this, but yoself so chill out with the disrespect." Tae tells me standing up.

Ever since he's made progress with walking again, he's been challenging me and I'm sick of his shit. Getting into his face, I just stare at him with my lip snarled up.

"If you gone swing, do it." He says to me. I don't even swing, I just start walking towards my cave. "You right, Tae, so take yo right ass in that room, pack yo shit, and let her bitch ass take you home. If y'all ain't gone by the time I finish my bottle of Henny, call the police cause somebody getting they ass whooped."

Chanel and Tae don't move so I turn back towards them. "Did I stutter?" Instead of answering me, Tae tells Chanel that they needed to leave before I started drinking which was true. I wasn't gone put my hands on them forreal, but everything and everybody pissing me off right now so I want them gone.

Once I put the code in and step inside, I immediately head to the bar and start chugging Hennessy; my chest and throat burning. Pulling out my phone, I stare at a picture of me and Milani then let the tears flow. The more I drink, the more I cry and think about her; knowing that I fucked up. I might do a lot of shit, but I'd never cheat on her; especially not with Chanel.

I pull my gun from my pocket and stare at it while continuing to drink. Everybody's negative words about me flood my mind as I cock my gun, putting it up to my temple. Since I do so much wrong, I've finally decided to do something right. I'm gonna make everybody's lives better by taking my own. My kid will be better off without me. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and pull the trigger but nothing happens. I slowly open my eyes then try to pull the trigger, but once again the gun jams which pisses me off. Giving up, I throw the gun onto the table and take a long swig of liquor.

My head starts spinning as I make a grown up decision to put the bottle down and face my problems like a man. God just gave me two second chances when that gun jammed so I take that as a sign that I need to get my shit together.

Drinking and smoking is a temporary fix. I need a permanent one. I use my phone to find a nearby therapist and call to make an appointment.

"Hello, the office is closed at the moment. If you are in need of emergency personnel press one, if you are a returning client preparing to set up an appointment or reschedule press two, if you are a new client seeking a therapist, press three." The automated messages says.

I press three and wait for further instructions. "Thank you for taking interest in JC Health and Wellness center. Please leave your name, number, and reason for seeking therapy after the beep. You will receive a call back when the office opens."

"My name is Dallas Jacobs. My number is 312-508-9336. I'm seeking therapy because I'm an alcoholic who just lost his girlfriend and unborn child. I was molested by my uncle at a young age and it forced me to grow up too early. I don't know how to love and I'm losing everything because of it. I need help so I can be a better father to my kid and a better partner to my woman, well my ex. I lost them because of a misunderstanding with her hoe ass best friend."

Hanging up the phone, I walk over to the couch and lay down with the covers and pillows that are already here.

I take a deep breath and exhale it deeply, talking to myself. "You did good, boy. The first step to healing is to admit that you have a problem and you just did that."

My last thoughts before I fall asleep are of me, Milani, and our kid on vacation. I hope it'll actually happen one day.