"Bay! I missed you so much." Zoe squeals as she engulfs me in a rib crushing hug. 

"can't ....breathe" I struggle to say while being crushed by Zoe. She releases her grip on me and she has the brightest smile on her face.

"Did you guys win?"

"Yes! Of course, we did. First place! We could go to state championship!" she squeals and jumps up and down. People in the hallway send Zoe weird looks, but I think she has gotten used to it by now.

"What's the squealing about?" Issac walks over to us with more of a pep in his step than usual.

"We won. The debate team won first place." She squeals and I have to hold my ears for a minute. 

"Congratulations Zo" a voice says from behind Zoe and she turns around to meet Asher staring at her. Behind his bad boy persona, Asher has real feelings for people, especially Zoe.

For a minute, they just stare at each other like they haven't seen each other in years, but Zoe is first to snap out of the bubble the two naturally put themselves in.

"Thanks." she says to him and turns back around. "Bay, I will meet you in the lunchroom. Don't take too long." she says and leaves and goes in the lunchroom.

Asher goes in his locker and throws in his books and then slams it shut. "Alright see you after school bud" Asher tells Issac and slaps him on the back and walks away.

I look to Issac and ask, "What is he talking about? Aren't you about to go in there for lunch?"

Light footsteps sound on the marble floor and when I look away from Issac, I see Mackenzie Taylor walking over to us.

"Ready?" she asks Issac and you could hear her British accent in her voice. It's not as prominent as it was when she first came to the school, but it is still there. 

Issac looks to me after shooting Mackenzie a quick smile which makes her blush.

"I am going out for lunch with Mackenzie." Issac says with a small smile on his face.

"Hi, I'm Mackenzie." Mackenzie says and holds out her hand for me to shake. I politely return the handshake.

"I'm Bay." I say and return her a smile of my own. Mackenzie smiles back and then looks back up at Issac. Mackenzie looks about 5'5, while Issac is a good 6'3 and a half maybe, so she has to look up to see him.

"Alright, we should get going." Issac says and hands me a smile before walking away with Mackenzie. I watch as the two walk out the building seeming quite content with themselves. I put a smile on my face hoping my feelings will match up with how I look: happy. I walk into the lunchroom and to the table where Zoe is sitting. 

I sit in front of Zoe and she stares at me, examining my face. For a good minute, she just sits there staring at me.

"What happened? What did I miss?" Zoe asks and I could already feel the stress in her voice. Does that make sense? Probably not.

"Zo. I-I think.."

"You made a big mistake didn't you?" Zoe finishes my sentence for me. I put my head in my hands. Damn her for knowing me so well.

I need to be happy for him. This is what I wanted. Just friendship. Right? Right.

"Tell me what's going on Bay."

10 minutes of explaining what is going on btwn. Issac, Mackenzie, and Bay later...

"You done fucked up." Zoe says and shakes her head. She has that disapproving look on her face.

"Thanks Zo. I am feeling the support here." I say and throw my hands up in the air out of frustration.

"Why the hell would you go and let Issac start dating some other chick? And Victoria...why the hell am I surprised?"

"I want him to be happy. And the thing is, I can't even hate her because she is so nice and polite. He deserves to be happy and I rejected him how many times. Now he is actually gone, and I feel regretful when I shouldn't."

"Wait, so the day I was gone for competition, he slept over the house."

"Yeah."

"In your bed?"

"Yeah. Zoe, when Issac and I sleep over at each others houses, we sleep in the same bed now. It's not weird like it was when we just started out as friends. 

"Does he spoon you?" she gushes.

I roll my eyes. "Not really. Zoe, we are friends." Unfortunately.

What have I done?

"I don't know what to do Bay. I mean, he is moving on and you have to be the supportive friend here. That's all you can be at the moment. It's that or nothing."

"I know." I reply glumly.

"It hurts living with regret." she asks me, but she isn't looking at me. I follow her eye line to see she is staring at Asher who is speaking with some friends at his table.

"Zoe, talk to him." I tell her. She looks back at me with sadness in her eyes and she looks back down at her fingers. We both brought no lunch, so after school, I will buy us pizza at home.

"Bay, what would I say? Every time I look at him, two things come to mind: One, you cheated on me with a bunch of girls and my aunt right in front of my face. Two, I still feel love for him even though he gave me a thousand reasons not to. I want to hug him, kiss him, cuddle with him like we did when we watched Martin re-runs."

"Bay, there really is a thin line between love and hate and I don't know which one I feel for him. I want to cry, but I want to cry in his arms. I can't do that though Bay. I lost myself in him and I lost self respect for myself so much that I let him sleep with other girls when we were together kind of. I only ended it when it hit home. I talk about feminism and self respect for women and all that crap, but yet still, one boy made me forget my values. I can't lose myself again Bay. 

"But how could you heal without finding peace in yourself Zo. You need to talk to him, find closure or something so you could forgive yourself."

"You're right. I just don't know if I could do it right now. It still feels like he just did it yesterday. Every time I see him, it just adds salt to the wound."

"Yeah, I know how it feels" I respond to her while thinking about Mackenzie and Issac.

"Us Stewart girls look like we are bound to have boy problems. We never get the guy."

"I will drink to that." Zoe says and takes a swig of her can of soda. She passes the can to me and I take a large gulp of the sweet, bubbly drink and then I rest it on the table.

*Insert the longest sigh ever *