《Coder Girl /Dreamwastaken/》՞՞83՞՞
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His hand froze in my hair and so did his face expressions. As much as I tried to tell the story in a way that wouldn't hurt me and wouldn't be too dramatic for him to hear, it still got quite a reaction from both of us.
"That's- not okay," he finally spoke, "I'm so sorry, you really didn't deserve that. No one does."
"Ah, it's okay.. I'm not mad at her, not at all. I understand her," I truly stood by my words, "it just sucks to know that I was something like a test animal to her while she meant a lot to me- fuck it, doesn't matter anymore."
I knew for a fact I was telling this story for the first and the last time. And weirdly enough it didn't have as strong of an effect on me as it did before, when I recalled the memories in my head.
I could tell he was in a loss of words. It's hard reacting to things like this. And I understood it by my whole heart.
"What about you tho? How many relationships did you have?" I was interested to hear the answer, but would totally understand if he decided not to answer.
"Ah.. a few non-serious ones, and one similar to yours in the terms of being traumatizing." He laughed.
"Were you like.. in love?" I looked up from his lap, and his hand stopped moving in my hair once again.
"You know, at that time I genuinely thought I was. And even until lately, I was sure it was love." It sounded like he was admitting this to himself for the first time. He was hesitant about his words, narrowed his eyes before saying something and took a lot of time just to form a sentence.
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"What was it?" I encouraged him to speak, seeing that he was in a loophole of his own thoughts.
"You know that thing- like, I don't know how to explain. Like when you think you were in love until you feel something stronger than that?"
I had no idea what he was saying, but nodded anyway, just to see him keep explaining and hopefully catch up to it in the process.
"It's like- isn't love the most you can feel towards someone? You shouldn't be able to feel anything more than that, right?"
"I mean, probably.." I shrugged, "You'd know better than me, I suck at this."
He was silent for a moment. Probably tangled in his own thoughts again. I gave him all the time he needed, and finally he spoke again.
"What I'm saying is, I definitely had stronger feelings than those and- uhm.. yeah, so.. yeah."
I had no idea how long his relationship lasted, how it went, what happened and what he was talking about in general. But I could tell he wasn't comfortable, so changing the topic would be the best option.
But I also wanted to make sure he didn't want to talk about it before doing so. And when I asked and he made it clear that he didn't want to, we both came to an agreement to get ready for bed. Can't believe we spoke for 2 hours and didn't even notice it.
"Did you talk with Nick and George today?" I spoke while putting my hair up in a bun, as he rinsed the toothpaste mixture from his mouth.
"George said he was busy. With god knows what," he dried the corners of his mouth with the towel, "and Nick didn't pick up."
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"I've spoken with Nick today. No idea about George tho." I mentioned as we headed back to the bedroom.
"Oh so Nick picks up your calls and not mine?" Clay laughed.
"Actually he was the one who called."
"Even worse." He shook his head, sighing.
"Did you know George told him that he regrets setting us up?" I cracked up in the middle of my sentence, still not over the fact that Nick snitched on George.
"And George told me that Nick said that he thinks you're too cool for me." He laughed too, facepalming at his own words.
"Nick only speaks the truth," I giggled, "by the way, give me a shirt to sleep in."
He smiled, nodding and getting up.
"This is my favorite activity," he slid the wardrobe door open, "picking clothes for you."
"I just need a shirt, give me something." I rolled my eyes seeing him go through the shirts.
Then he pulled out a black v-neck that looked way too big for me.
"A v-neck? Really?" I grabbed the shirt, holding it on my body, "My tits are literally gonna fall out of the neck cut."
"So you see the purpose of it." He grinned proudly. Cocky motherfucker.
I really couldn't care less. I don't have enough energy to protest and go through the effort of picking another shirt. I'm sure his cockiness is just going to backfire on him anyway.
I put on a fake smile, putting the shirt on the bed and hooking my fingers around the hem of the sweater I was wearing. With his eyes on me, I pulled it up and off of my body, throwing the fabric on the chair that was already full of clothes.
"Oh. Okay then." He blinked, observing the view of my black lace bra.
I smirked, moving down to my pants. Maybe he didn't expect me to get undressed infront of him, and for sure he didn't expect to see me dressed to impress underneath. What can I say, I love my sets.
Before he could react, I put on the shirt he gave me. As expected, it revealed a lot of cleavage and reached a bit higher than my mid-thigh.
Then my hands worked their way around my bra to take it off while the shirt was covering everything; this is one of my many talents.
"Have fun sleeping with a hard-on." I threw the bra at him playfully, and watched him catch it with a smirk.
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