I need everything to go perfectly.

Esayr's hands were at my shoulders again kneading at the right knots that were beginning to form. He was whispering soothing things to me that weren't quite words and for a moment my fingers grasped at him with a different kind of desperation.

This was something that I would have to do. This was something that everyone on this ship would look to me to navigate because frankly put I was the only one with first-hand knowledge of what it was like to be a human woman on this ship. I needed guidance in a place where there was none save possibly from Prince Roan, but if I had to guess I'd say his advice would be cryptic at best.

"Whatever happens it will be all right, Addy."

We were dawdling too long in the Comm room, but I was losing track of the air I was pulling into my lungs and I needed to get myself under control. "What if it's not? What if I say something and turn her against you all and I make everything worse? I've been so caught up in..." Everything, "...I haven't even thought about what I'll do to win her to your side."

"Whatever the threads of this world have woven, Addy; is what will happen. We will weather it, be it a tear or a knot."

"Are you nervous?" He never sounded like it, though I knew he sometimes was.

"Very," He flattened down my hair and pressed a kiss along my forehead, "but you can at least rest easy knowing we've already nearly destroyed our own reputation. There's very little else you can do to make it worse."

I wanted to laugh, but instead, I traced the soft fabric of his dark shirt, spreading my hand until it rested at the space above his steady heartbeat. "I wish I could feel you again."

His fingers tightened at the back of my neck, "You will."

And, instead of questioning it, I resolved myself to believe him. There were enough small things to worry about that I wouldn't add this other one to the list at just this moment. Besides, we'd have the rest of our lives together to get that level of bond back. "To see Cece then"

Esayr muttered something about English being vexing over that sentence and I savored the teasing as he pulled me out into the Comm Bay proper, where all the crowd of males stood waiting for us.

A prickle of apprehension ran down my spine, as they stood in one clump as if waiting for us, "Did something happen?" Esayr ushered me in front of him, hands settling on my hips.

Vailen's hands were folded behind his back, his head cocked to the side just a little bit and there was an odd smile on his face that was looser, less tightened with formality. "Addison Kane, our first human liaison, we have a gift for you should you want it."

There were smiles that helped to ease my nerves, but I still felt my palms slicken with concern. Esayr didn't complain though when one of them snuck to rest on his. Instead, he flipped his own hand and gripped mine for a moment in a tight squeeze.

Vailen pulled his hands forward and in them, there was a tight bundle of that same light blue cloth. It was that light, dusty blue with silver accents that all of the males on the communication team wore.

There was silence in the room. It was a silence I'd never encountered here where --in some way or another-- there was nearly always muted chatter.

Vailen cleared his throat, reminding me that I'd said nothing. I took a few tentative steps forward, out of Esayrs embrace, and to those on the Comm team that watched with rapt attention.

Vailen's voice was a softer lilt, "It's yours if you want it, whenever you're ready. It wasn't our intention to rush you, instead, we wanted to offer the option of a united front," He smiled wider then, one that revealed the points of his teeth in a way that his usual smiles didn't. "And, we wanted to offer you a welcome here, as we know this hasn't been easy." He lifted the bundle of cloth a little higher as I approached.

Hands drifted over the fabric, smooth nearly like silk, the sensation shocked me enough that I realized they were my own hands that were unrolling the baby blue tunic. Underneath it was a pair of those same simple black pants. I twisted the shirt again, admiring the slight shimmer to the fabric. The arm had two silvered bands around the bicep. "Thank you," my words were a whisper easily heard in the room, "it's beautiful."

I would have given anything to have that connection to Esayr, to mitigate this upwelling of feeling in my chest that was rising higher and higher up into my throat, full enough to choke me and burn my eyes. Did a little full-time waitress down on the Florida coast deserve this? My doubts and my demons whispered: No. They whispered that I deserved nothing at all, in voices that echoed bitter human hearts.

But, it was my quiet cynical voice that I heard in the back of my mind, which had gotten more and more confident here on this ship, that whispered: If you can't believe you deserve it yet, then become someone that will. "Thank you. I—" my words stopped as my eyes overflowed with tears.

Esayr's fingers traced along the back of my arm, the touch helped to ease the feelings overflowing inside of me since our born couldn't yet.

When I looked up there were tens of stricken eyes pinned to me. I smiled, softening the blow of my tears so they'd know they meant something else, "I love them."

It didn't quite look like they believed me, that is until I asked if I could use the Comm room I'd just vacated to change into the uniform. Then there was an easiness that returned to the room as I Vailen ushered me back so I could change.

The fabric flowed like water over my skin. The long look Esayr gave me when I stepped back into the room inclined me to think he liked the look of me in Val' uniform and it would have been a lie to say I didn't like it either.

Vailen's sharp nod told me the outfit looked right, and I hadn't —at the very least—put it on wrong. "Are you ready?"

His voice was bracing and it made my hands, which had been straightening my sleeve, still. "As I'll ever be, I think."

Vailen nodded with more understanding than I ever would have expected. "We had her undergo a scan for out of date technology that your planet could have gotten a hold of. She was amenable." Vailen glanced at me again, from head to toe, in a way that was more assessing than anything else, "Cecelia was just transported to the rematerialization bay," I met his silvered gaze, "are you ready to meet the female?"

That question caused a wave of chatter in the room that made an air of concern filter through me. I was reminded of the unfiltered interest from the our friends, whom I considered to be more mild than most after having been acquainted with me. I'll have to talk to Esayr about a possible solution if she feels uncomfortable by the attention.

If I were being honest I'd say it would probably be too much to ask to have the males give as a wider berth than they otherwise would.

"I'm ready. Let's go," I reached my hand out to Esayr. Wherever I went, he would go with me.

He wove his fingers through mine easily.

We'd meet Cecelia together.

****A/N****

For Memorial Day weekend, I went out on a boat and went tubing with a bunch of my close friends. I also am now the color of a nice sun-dried tomato. There's even a very visible tan line on my wrist where I keep my hair tie.

I am -~crispy~- from the sun.

This part is a little shorter, but it was purely just for myself. I've wanted this scene for a long time, where Addy receives a formal action of acceptance for her place on the ship. While it might not necessarily have the severity I'd originally wanted, I like it nonetheless.

Also I'm just a sucker for spaceship uniforms.

Happy June, everyone. It's unbearably hot here so I find myself under my fan at my computer more often than not, cooling off and just generally...peeling from my sunburn.

~Layla