"What the fuck were thinking. Mixing your fucking pills and alcohol. You could have been drowning in your own fucking vomit. Or fucking died from alcohol poisoning. You were fucking stupid. You can't even begin to understand how fucking angry I am right now at you." Jade hadn't even been up for a second the next morning when she had a furious Marcus yelling at her for the last 15 minutes.

She was tired and hungover and more than anything wanted a drink. She wanted to drown in the bottom of a bottle and knew that would never happen again. She could feel the pain and memories starting to surface as they broke free of the cage that she had locked them in.

The bars made from alcohol were fizzling away and soon there would be an onslaught of memories that would whisk her away into a dark world of the unknown. Marcus couldn't see this. He couldn't see as sweat started to form on her brow. He couldn't see her hands starting to shake and the increase of her breathing.

He was so focused on his anger and blind rage he didn't see what going cold turkey would do to Jade. She could already feel the effects and it was killing her inside. She could feel it ripping her apart from the insides.

She needed a drink.

"Are you even listening to me?" Marcus yelled, and Jade felt her focus snap back to Marcus.

"I need a drink," Jade said dryly, and Marcus just laughed.

"Fat chance that will happen." Jade groaned and grabbed her head. Everything was becoming static noise as Marcus's voice faded into the background. Behind the static noise, she could hear the faint sound of men yelling and gunfire. She groaned because she didn't want to hear or feel anything.

"Please, please I need a drink." Her eyes began to water, and Marcus just stood their arms crossed as he stared down at her with a disapproving look.

"No." Hearing the word no made something inside of Jade snap. She was like a rubber band that had been stretched too far and it just snapped leaving that sting behind.

"I want a fucking drink. I hate you. I fucking hate you." She went to move off the bed, but Marcus was quicker. He pinned Jade's arms to the bed and straddled her waist not that her lower body would move.

Jade tried bucking him off, tried to move her arms, but his body weight was keeping her pinned to the soft mattress beneath.

"I hate you." She spat in his face and Marcus was so fucking tempted to backhand her across the face, but he restrained himself. He knew you don't hit a woman, but Jade was pushing him further and further each day. She could hate him, hit him all she likes, but he will not tolerate her spitting at him like some wild animal.

So instead he grabbed her cheeks tightly and squeezed them together, so she wouldn't spit at him again.

"Do that again and I will hit you." Marcus deep voice threatened as he let go of Jade's face.

"Fuck you." She went to spit in his face again, but Marcus was ready and before she could he leant down and kissed her.

It wasn't a sweet and gentle kiss. It was raw, aggressive and punishing. He swept his tongue along her lips as one hand still held onto her wrist and the other was pinning her hips to the bed. Their teeth clashed together as they fought for dominance, but Marcus won.

He always won.

When he came up for air panting, he was so distracted he didn't see Jade's fist until it came swinging into his face.

"Fuck." He yelled, and Jade used the opportunity to get out from under Marcus as fall to the floor. If her legs still worked, she would have legged it to the closet bottle she could find instead, she crawled. Once Marcus got over the throbbing in his face he looked towards the door where Jade was crawling too.

He jumped off the bed and took 4 steps before he was in front of her.

"Get out of my fucking way." She yelled, but Marcus simply picked her up and threw her onto the bed. This happened for the next 20 minutes. Jade would roll off the bed and crawl to the door only for Marcus to pick her up and throw her back onto the bed.

Jade didn't care how many times she fell. She didn't care about the pain; she didn't care about anything other than getting her lips around a bottle as quickly as she could.

"Ugh, just please let me have a drink." She yelled out in frustration when Marcus threw her back onto the bed.

"No." Jade slammed her fist into the bed as her body started to heave. Her breathing started to increase, and the static noise became louder. She gripped her head at the pounding that began, and she started to cry.

Jade found it hard to breathe. She felt her chest tightening and the static noise increased. She felt her body become numb as true fear coursed through her body.

"I just want a drink. I just want the pain to go away." She cried. Her body felt tired, her mind felt tired. Even breathing made her tired. Jade curled up in a ball on the bed as sobs caused her body to shake.

She could hear the yelling of men behind the static. She could hear the gunfire. She could feel the pain of the bullets entering her body. She could feel everything, and she wanted it to stop. She wanted this pain to disappear. This deep soulful pain that was embedded into her very soul.

So, she cried and she couldn't stop.

Marcus watched as Jade cried. He wanted to comfort her, but his anger at her was too strong so he left the room knowing she would soon fall asleep again, then the anger would start all over again.

"She finally stop?" His brother asked when he joined him in the lounge-room.

"For now." He went into the fridge and grabbed an ice pack, putting it on his throbbing cheek. He joined his brother on the lounge and sighed.

"I called Helen. She will come over with another psychiatrist with her. She will be here around 3 pm. Also, the cleaners are coming around midday. So, her place will be clean soon." Marcus simply nodded his head before resting it on the back of the couch.

"Fuck, it's only 11 am and I'm ready for bed." Marcus took the ice pack off his cheek knowing it would bruise. Jade had got him good. He didn't see it coming because he had been too caught up in the kiss.

"I'm going to head to the gym for a few hours. Jade should be sleeping. Reckon you could monitor her for a few hours?" His brother waved his hand and Marcus got everything ready to let out some of his frustration for a few hours.

When he returned Marcus could hear yelling from inside of the apartment. His workout had relaxed him, and he felt much calmer, but hearing yelling made him tense up and expect the worse.

When he opened the front door, he saw Marco standing in the lounge room with his arms crossed over his chest looking pissed off.

"What happened?" He asked dropping his bag by the door.

"I told Jade Helen was coming. Let's say, it does not impress her." Marcus sighed as he could hear Jade screaming from his room.

"I nearly gave her a bloody drink just to shut her up." Marcus vigorously rubbed his hands over his face trying to decide what he would do.

"Right I'll go deal with her. When Helen gets here, let her in." Marcus walked towards his bedroom door where everything was silent. He pushed opened the door a little and saw Jade sitting on the bed with her arms crossed.

"What the fuck do you want?" Marcus stepped into the room and crossed his arms and gave Jade the same harsh stare that she was giving him.

"You know what I want Jade." Jade huffed as Marcus came closer into the room. Jade noticed the light sheen of sweat that coated his skin and how his muscle seemed to be larger than they were before. Jade also noted the tired look in his eyes and for a second, she felt guilty.

Guilty that she was causing him to look older than his age. Guilty that he was stuck taking care of her. Guilty that as much as she hit screamed and said she hated him, she didn't. She wanted to hate him because hating Marcus was easy. Loving him was hard, and she loved him.

She didn't want to love him for many reasons, but mainly because she couldn't give him the life he deserved. She was a cripple. She could never walk again. Never be able to stand next to him. He would always bend down to her level and she hated that.

She hated the idea of Marcus always being there to support her. She hated the idea of never being able to stand by his side, to rise onto her toes to kiss him. So, she hated him because one day he would hate her too and let her go.

"Why can't you just let me go?" She finally asked, and Marcus came and sat at the end of the bed.

"I don't know Jade. I keep finding my way back to you, I can't help it." Jade looked down at her hands. The static noise was still present in her head, but it seemed to be silent at the moment. She still craved to have a bottle of whiskey and she still felt that soulful agony that was growing inside of her.

However, right now, at this very moment, she was peaceful. She didn't understand, her body was craving one thing and her mind another. She was angry, sad and some might even say depressed, but right now she felt none of that. She felt calmer than she had in weeks. She felt her emotions had been dialled up to 100% recently and there was no way to regulate them. She felt out of control in both body and mind and she didn't know what to do. She felt so confused and angry at the world, that they had been her driving emotions.

However, sitting here with Marcus after hours of being a bitch she felt calm. She felt like her old self and it worried her that this feeling of peace would go away.

"I wish you would let me go. I wish you would forget about me." Marcus said nothing as he sat there lost in his own thoughts. He wanted to reach out and pull Jade into his arms and whisper that everything would be okay, but he knew they weren't. He didn't want to break this peace between them, even if was only to last for a couple of minutes.

So, he sat there wishing and dreaming of a different life. One where Jade still could walk. A life where neither of them had so much pain and suffering boiling inside of them. A life where they both could love each other freely with no boundaries or restrictions.

That life was a fantasy, Marcus realised, because the reality was they both had demons and there would always be something stopping them from loving without restrictions.

There was a knock at the door and Marco waited a few minutes before poking his head inside the room.

"Helen is here." Was all he said before leaving. Marcus saw Jade tense up and he sighed waiting for her to lash out.

"She isn't here to talk Jade. She is here with another professional to give you the evaluation that was meant to be done months ago. So please try to answer all their questions and please try to be nice." Marcus stood up and when he opened the door, he saw Helen and another man with her.

"Hello, Marcus. This is Johnathan." Marcus shook hand with him before leading them into the room.

"I'll get you guys some chairs to sit down," Marco said as he went back into the kitchen and bought them back.

"We will leave you guys to it." Marcus left the room and hoped that Jade would talk to them, so they could start giving her the help she needed.

During the time Helen was over Johnathan came out and asked both Marcus and Marco a series of questions about Jade's mood and behaviours over the last couple of months before returning to the room with Jade.

When both Helen and Johnathan came out of the room later Marcus and Marco were both watching a movie on the tv.

"How did it go?" Marcus asked as he stood up Helen just nodded her head as she held her folder in her hands.

"We have some medication we would like to get Jade started on. One will be an antidepressant, one will be to help regulate her mood swing, and one will be to calm down her anxiety. They will make her very sleepy and drowsy for a while until she gets stabilised. I don't think we need to put her into rehab, but if she starts drinking again call me. She most likely will not want to take them but try." Helen handed over the prescription and Marcus quickly glanced at it before folding it into his back pocket.

"Any advice," Marco asked hoping they maybe had a short-term solution to dealing with Jade.

"My best advice would be, get her out of the house. People like Jade like to close themselves off to the world. So, get her outside and back into a routine, get her started on her therapy because that will help her a lot. Once she gets for independence for herself, you will see a change. Best advice from experience just take her. Don't worry about the screaming or yelling, she can't move by herself, so take her. She won't want to do anything the first few times, but after you will see her starting to respond. Hopefully, the medication will help." Marco nodded his head wishing he had a pen and paper to take notes.

"Key thing is to keep her away for anything that would be considered destructive. So, alcohol, medication, sharp object. I don't like to use the term suicidal, but Jade is struggling a lot and is being very self-destructive, so try to be strong. I promise this is the worst part." Marco and Marcus both walked Helen and Johnathan and once they were gone they got started on making Jade better, by throwing out every drop of alcohol in their house or anything that would be considered destructive.