Straight away. The whole room was suffocating me. Holden's dad went back to where his family was standing and whispered something into his wife's ear. She nodded. What were they saying? Did they all know? Holden finally came down the stairs, Ally shortly after. There was no way in hell I could face him. I couldn't tell him, but at the same time it felt like something he was entitled to know. Logan had lived for most of his life not knowing, Holden had no idea at all. Was it better that way? I made my way for the door before he had the chance to find me.

On my way out, I spotted Parker. His mum was still firmly by his side like a watchdog. There were so many things swirling around in my head. I just needed a long walk to clear my head. To work out what I was going to do, what I was meant to do. Too bad it was too dangerous at night to be walking alone.

Parker looked at me and briefly mouthed something. I couldn't make out what he was saying, but I gave him a quick wave and kept my head down to leave.

My hands were still shaking as I stood outside, waiting for the taxi I'd called. I crossed my arms to try and stop it.

"You thought you were getting away that easily?" Parker said from behind me. I turned around to see him leaning against one of the posts.

I made it obvious I was looking over his shoulder. He turned around. "What?"

"Just making sure Cerberus wasn't coming up behind you," I joked. Headlights broke through the darkness and the sound of gravel crunching got louder as the taxi approached. "My taxi's here," I said, awkwardly gesturing to the bright yellow cab that was now waiting for me to get in.

Instead, Parker closed the distance between us, passed me and went up to the door of the taxi. He opened it. "I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but we won't be needing the taxi," he said. He fished a hundred-dollar bill from his wallet and handed it to the driver who was more than happy to take it and leave.

"So do you just hand those out?" I guffawed.

"I wasn't just going to tell the man to leave with nothing," he retorted. "Besides, you look like you need a walk, so let's go." He started walking down the winding path away from the mansion. I wasn't going to protest.

"Wait up," I said, quickening my pace. The straps on my heels were starting to dig into my flesh, rubbing the sides of my feet raw. The gravel stones rolling as I stepped on them weren't helping.

"Can you walk any slower?" He said.

"Fine. I'll take my shoes off," I said, stopping to unstrap my heels. The moment I released the strap, I could feel the muscles in my feet relax and return to their original shape. I slung the straps over my fingers to hold them. As soon as I took the first step, I realised that was a mistake. The gravel stones dug into the soles of my feet.

"Let me just carry you," Parker huffed, stopping again.

"Um, what?"

"I was raised to be a gentleman," he said, bending down.

"Only until we reach a path or grass," I said, getting on. My feet were too sore, I was too tired, and my mind was too tired to argue. "Does a gentleman leave a girl half naked outside the school changerooms?" I asked, grinning, reminding him of one of the first times we'd run into each other.

The warmth radiated from his body and I could feel each step he took as it hit the gravel. All I could see was the winding path. I couldn't tell where it was going, but only that it continued. If we kept going, the night wouldn't end. Everything would stay frozen in time. That was my broken logic – as if the walking, and pretending time wasn't still ticking by was going to solve everything.

"A gentleman also doesn't stir up fake dating rumours," he said. "It was the lesser of two evils." He slowed down a bit when he realised I wasn't responding. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

As soon as his right foot hit the path, I told him to let me down. He released me instantly and my feet pounded against the footpath.

"Thanks," I murmured. "So gentalmanly," I said sarcastically. I hated the idea of my dress picking up dirt and garbage so with my heels in one hand I tried to gather up the bottom of my dress, doing very poorly as the hand holding my shoes couldn't pick up any substantial amount of dress.

"Just give me those," he said, taking the heels and looping the straps around his fingers instead.

"Thank you," I said softly.

"You seemed distressed earlier. Anything you wanted to talk about?"

The exact things on my mind were not my place to tell him about. I'd promised Logan and Holden didn't even know. Nobody seemed to know. There was no way it was leaving my lips. Was Holden ever going to know? Was Logan's mum telling the truth? How was Holden going to react? How was his mum going to react?

So, I lied. "No. Just...distract me."

"So when are you and Holden calling it quits?" He asked, forcing a subject change.

"Monday," I said. "This is exhausting. All of this," I sighed, gesturing to the mansion that was getting smaller and smaller behind us as we walked. I was tired of the lavish lifestyles everyone around me lived, and tired of the judgement and the secrets. "I also think I'm wearing more than my entire net worth," I said, slightly shaking the bits of fabric I had in my hand to make my point.

"You can't just measure someone's net worth by their money. Surely there are things that matter more. The money it costed to buy this dress was made in four minutes, possibly less. How can that be compared to an entire life?"

"I'm hoping it costed how much you make in four minutes, not Lennox Enterprises," I joked. "But wow, deep."

"I know you probably think all I care about is money, but I did have other role models growing up," he laughed. "My parents are a different species altogether."

"No, I've never thought that," I replied, honestly this time.

"Plus, if it was all about money, we'd never be friends."

"Woah. For your information, I make like eight dollars an hour," I said. "Dick," I added, gently shoving him onto the grass beside the path. He laughed and fell back into step beside me.

"I swear I'll get my bodyguards to tackle you," he laughed.

We continued wandering down the path. Parker pointed out some of the buildings in the distance. He wasn't pointing them out, but it was hard to miss the number of sky-rise buildings that were owned by his family. The Lennox name was in almost everything.

"And, this is my favourite building," he held his arm outstretched, pointing towards a banking building that was definitely over thirty stories high.

"Your favourite building is a...bank?"

"No. If you go up to the very top floor, up onto the roof, you can see over the entire city. There's even one of those swingy chairs set up there. Let me show you."

"Okay."

He raised an eyebrow. "Don't you have a curfew or something?"

I shrugged and grinned.

We needed to get a taxi to actually get there.

"Sorry bud, I think they're closed," I stated, keenly observing that this building did indeed operate during normal hours only. Parker led me to a door on the side of the building. It said 'authorised access only'. There was a key swipe next to the door. "Please tell me we're not breaking and entering. Your family might be able to bail you out, but I'll die in there."

"You're so dramatic," he laughed, pulling a card out from his pocket. He swiped it.

"You guys own a bank?" I knew they had a jillion businesses but I didn't think they were in banking.

"No, we own the building," he said. "I promise that wasn't meant to sound that dickheady," he laughed. He shut the door behind him, and we took the elevator to the top. I could feel my ears pop as we approached the top.

The elevator released us onto the top floor and we took the stairs to the roof. The fresh night air hit us as soon as we opened the door. I rushed over as close to the edge as I dared to go. Below us, the streetlights illuminated the dark winding streets. The headlights of cars looked like small ants darting around. Up there, everything else seemed tiny. It was like looking at the city from another world. At that moment, on that rooftop, none of my problems existed. If we could have stayed there forever, it would have been perfect.

Around us, lights were blinking in the sky, the stars were twinkling, and the moon was so close it felt like I could touch it.

"Wow," I said breathlessly.

"It's amazing right?"

I nodded. I wandered around the rooftop, looking over the edge on each side and then staring straight up at the sky. Parker sat down on the swinging chair for a moment, taking in the sights.

He eventually made his way over to where I was.

"Just double checking, you and Holden aren't actually in love right?" He suddenly asked.

"We're not," I replied. The occasional sweet gesture and heart flutter wasn't love. Surely not.

"Okay."

"Why?"

"Because that would make this a lot more awkward."

"Make what awkward? Our... friendship?" I hesitated, unsure of how to describe what the hell we were.

"Yeah, friends," he chuckled. Then he stopped. We were standing on the middle of the roof, and he was staring into my eyes. He leaned in. My breath hitched in my throat.

Fuck.

Was it possible to get a redo of my first kiss? If so, I wanted this to be it.

Suddenly, the whirring of a chopper shook me back to reality, its headlights beamed past us. We quickly separated. Parker cleared his throat. "Please tell me that's not your mum," I groaned. I wasn't in the mood to be decapitated.

"Nah, she'd just storm the building with armed guards. The chopper would only be if that failed." I could barely hear what he was saying even though it was clear he was yelling it.

The blades sent the cold night air whipping against my face, dropping my body temperature, raising the goosebumps all along my arms. He pulled me in and held me close while we watched it disappear. As soon as it got far away enough, it went quiet again, and he let me go.

"The stars are so pretty," I practically yelled out, trying to drown out the deafening silence. Yet again a classic case of my foot-in-mouth disease involving a breathing member of the male species.

"Let's get you home," he said.

With that, the moment was over.

After everything that had happened that night, the only thing going through my mind as I lay in bed at two in the morning was

whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuck

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It wasn't just my mind that was in chaos that Monday when we got back to school. As it turned out, after that awkward Friday night at the gala, the Vermonts and Lennoxes had decided to take an impromptu vacation to the Swiss alps.

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