Chapter 34

Adams POV

"Well then...?" I questioned my mother who sighed sitting down on the chair.

"She lost her baby boy" my mother spoke quietly. I knew this news had really upset her. She hated the news of anyone's death and the fact that a baby had lost its life had really gotten to her.

"Oh okay" was all i could answer back to her. I hadn't lost a child so i could really relate back to the feeling really. Even though i was told countless of times that the baby was mines, at this point i didn't feel any sort of hurt or depression. I felt like myself but the news was downing on my slightly.

Even though Jesse is such an evil person no one deserved to lose a child. Sure Jesse deserved it but not her baby. The baby still had a life ahead of itself. Growing up, making friends, going to school, finding his mate, growing up to be a father the list goes on. The poor child had everything cut short.

"Mum you couldn't save the baby." I tried to comfort.

After Jesse went into labour she was rushed to the labour ward where they had given her some medicine to soothe her body and calm her pains. But unfortunately the babies breathing had stopped while she went into labour. It's sad how she was forced to give birth to her dead son.

"Jesses not well to you know. The news had really gotten to her. It seems like that losing her pup made her more aware and maybe it's changed her slightly." My mother sighed. "She looks lost and alone. I don't know but this isn't the confident Jesse we all know. I think her eyes have opened up to reality. She realises now this isn't a fairytale, death is inevitable"

"I always think I'm going to hell you know" i joked to lighten up the mood, but the stern look she gave me shut me up.

"Adam you're not going hell!" she barked.

"You know what this isn't a fairytale like you put it." i mocked her words. "Hell was made for a reason, a punishment for those who deceive and go against god. Don't make it look like we are all going to paradise cos where not. We all may end up in hell. So stop trying to make this conversation into something it's not. I could end up their cos of my sins. Look at us mum were so oblivious to the things that could happen to us, yet we look for the happiness. Nothing is full of flowers and sunshine everything including this world is too beautiful to be real. So don't tell me I'm not going to hell cos no one knows mum" i spat.

For some reason all these events had made me open up my eyes. Even the near death experience, I could go to hell. No one knows so why try to convince yourself you're going to paradise when you may end up in hell.

"I'm not going to have this conversation with you Adam" she got up leaving walking out the door.

"Yes ignore the truth!" i shouted after her.

I sighed laying back into the cushion. "Gosh people are so ignorant" i muttered.

I had been in this shit hole for 2 weeks now and i felt more agitated. My skin was just itching to get out of this place i truly felt like the walls were making me quite claustrophobic. It felt like i had nowhere to run to and i could feel my wolf just clawing my inside to get out.

All of a sudden my heart rate stopped when the scent of a certain somebody was at the door. My attention turned to the door, my eyes trying to work some magic just to see the person behind the door. I felt my wolf rising to the surface; his presence was quickly notified as he forcefully made me stand up taking slow but heavy steps towards the door.

What was taking them so long? I questioned.

All of a sudden he door opened and I collapsed from the person standing in front of me.

"Adam!" my brother's voice raised with concern. He put down Alina in a vacant chair rushing towards me, helping me up. But my butt was glued to the ground i stared at my long lost brother.

The brother who left me to face the world. The brother who walked out of my life.

"Get off me!" I spat which made him flinch. I hazily got up, unable to hold my balance almost falling but i didn't want to look weak in front of Leo so i walked back to my bed slowly. I could feel my brothers stare burn into the back of my head.

I sat in my bed swinging my legs slowly over the bed. I finally rested, turning to face Alina who was just looking at Leo with a puppy eyes. I saw him walk towards her holding out a blanket and picking her up.

Anger finally surfaced within me as I saw the affection he gave MY daughter not HIS.

I could tell Leo caught onto my reaction because he slowly brought Alina to me but very hesitantly.

"I'm not a threat" I voiced through clenched teeth.

"I never said you were but you do have the temper Adam" he sighed.

"Yes that was after you left" i replied back despitefully. His face expression just turned to complete sadness with a hint of regret.

"Adam, please?" he begged.

"No you left" i turned my head away. "Can i hold MY daughter now" he flinched when i said the word MY but he has to realise she is mines and not his.

He brought Alina to me placing her down next to me, i shuffled so she got enough place.

We sat in silent just staring at Alina who took fascination of all the machines around and playing with a very boring night gown of mine that just played on the foot of the bed.

"Adam" Leo said which made me glance at him. i didn't bother giving him an answer i just turned my attention back to my daughter. "Look I know your probably wondering why I left and i do have the answer for it. But I know is shouldn't have left you and left everything behind." He sighed. "I was just being a coward I didn't want to face Tom or mum after i did runner. You do know how it feels when Tom is probably annoyed or angry when we make a wrong move; well by me leaving i knew he wouldn't want to see my face again. I couldn't face him after I just walked out like that" he paused. He was right about dad; dad wouldn't be able to forgive for deceiving and destroying the family's name. But that didn't excuse him for what he did to me, leaving me. "i missed you" he whispered.

"Then why didn't you come back for me. Your little brother" i hoarsely answered back. I hadn't realised i really needed to cry, his presence made me emotionally angry and happy.

"That was a mistake of a lifetime okay Adam. I was young Adam i couldn't take care of you while I still didn't know what was going on for me Adam. What if I brought you to a life that you hated? I couldn't live with myself. At least i knew mum and Tom could give you a better life. Not with me a rogue alpha running the street fighting to start a new life."

"Don't blame anybody but yourself. You left because Aretha left!" i bitterly laughed. He acted like he cared but all that happened was his mate had disappeared so he left just like her.

I looked at my brother who looked confused.

"What do you mean she left?" he sat their puzzled by my statement. I realised he hadn't known what i had told him.

"Nothing" I barley whispered

"No Adam tell me what do you mean she left" this time his voice grew larger and angrier.

Alina looked at Leo with concern and worry.

"Your scaring Alina, Leo so sit down" i ordered.

His body was heaving with fury, his eyes burning with rare passion of anger. This time he didn't look like the clam collective Leo, no he looked just like me. A ruthless killer. His body stopped instantly when he saw the fear on my face, I tried my best to mask it with blank expression but fear over cam my expression.

"She didn't leave Adam" he sat down looking anywhere but me.

"But dad said-" i cut myself off when i realised i just told Leo who told me.

"That f-!" he stopped mid sentence when he saw Alina just playing their on my hospital bed. "He lied" he laughed bitterly.

"Leo?" this time I had worry laced in my tone.

"I had to bury her!" he cried out in anger. "I had to watch her lifeless body being buried because of that man we call dad!" he spat.

"But..." it wasn't making sense. Dad had told me that Aretha, had ran away, the reason why my brother had been so miserable and depressed, but I didn't realise that I couldn't cause him such pain. How could i be so dumb not to realise he lost her. That why he never spoke and ignored everyone just giving my parents cold shoulder.

"Leo, what happened?"

"Oh Tom didn't tell you oh great brother. He killed her" he replied coldly. "i was the one who had to stare at her lifeless body for ages, holding onto her cold hands. I was the one who found her dead body lying near a ditch" he clenched his fist. "i had to see all the suffering she had been through. Not mum nor Tom or anyone. I HAD TO!" he exclaimed, whole his clenched fist rose in the air.

"But dad said..." I then realised that my dad had lied to me, to make it seem as though Leo had just left. But now he realised that his brother left because the loss of his mate. I hadn't realised how selfish and cruel I was acting towards my brother and wish I could take it all back.

If I knew the truth I would have taken his departure differently, but it was too late of me to become another man. I had changed differently because of Leo's departure but the truth may have made me a better person, probably I would have been happy with Mariah and maybe with our daughter. There would be no complication, everything would have been fine. But no my father had to ruin both our lives. This time my anger was mainly faced at my parents. How could they lie and be such cruel parents.

I felt Leos hands touch mine softly, this time i didn't pull back but pull my brother into a bone crushing hug. "I'm so sorry" I whispered. It was an awkward hug since we were both men instead of me being the little kid and him being the older protective, caring brother.

Leo pulled away, couching and holding onto my hands, it felt weird but as kids he would always reassure me by holding my hands, not interlacing but putting his hands over mine. "It's okay. I left without telling you anything. I was just...depressed and i needed to get away. When i found out what Tom had done I had to run. I had to find a way to erase everything from my memory, even if that meant you." He sighed glancing down at me. "I was scared Adam. I had second thoughts of taking you with me but I knew I would deprive you of allot of things. Your friends, parents and your childhood" when he uttered the word childhood i flinched unintentionally, which Leo had caught on to.

He had worry expression on his face. "What happened, Adam?" he asked calmly.

"Nothing" I mumbled.

"Adam, don't lie to me" this time his voice rose with protectiveness and anger, like many times it had when i was younger.

"It's nothing okay. I was just upset you were gone" i answered him in a monotone voice.

"Don't lie to me Adam. I came back to a brother who had completely changed. Not from adolescent, but to something I can't even recognise Adam." He tried to call his nerves down but his clenched jaw and locked teeth showed me i was making him lose his patience.

"You want to know the truth" i spat angrily, he nodded carefully. "When you went i was abused" my bitter voice scared me, but I still managed to calm down.

Leo just stared at me with as blank expression. Next thing i knew Leo was shaking with anger while his face stayed blank. He walked to the foot of my bed taking Alina in his arm and walking towards the door. Is this how he was going to make his exit, do another runner?

I seethed with anger aimed at him, that all he ever does. Run!

I managed to calm myself down when i saw anger flash in Leo's eyes. I froze watching his body move rigidly with every breath he took.

"Say something" I begged worriedly.

His head turned towards me. I could see the anger in his eyes; it was like something i hadn't ever seen. "Leo your angry, give me Alina" I warned him carefully

"No" he said through clenched teeth, he then walked out of the door. I was screaming for him to leave her behind and I painfully tried to move but my body collapsed to the ground. I layer helplessly on the floor. I didn't know what just happened Leo never looked like that, and the fact that Alina could be in danger pained me.

.......................................

"Leo?" I mumbled rubbing my tired eyes.

The figure came closer making me flinch. I had no recognition of who the person was since i was in complete dark. I heard someone sit on the seat next to me.

"Who?" The voice whispered startling me.

Silence surrounded us both. I couldn't reply back. It was like a painful memory that i was trying hard to leave behind.

"Leo, leave it" I pleaded silently in my head that he would drop it, but i knew this was Leo who i was talking about, born to be stubborn.

"Tell me Adam" this time I caught the desperation in his voice, and honestly it did break my heart a little to see him, more like hear him like this.

"I'm not a little boy anymore" I moved to switch on the light that was next to my bed, but the pain in arm shot right up making me groan, curing myself at the same time.

"You are to me!" he shouted, making me flinch which caused me pain to my body. He faced his back towards me groaning in irritation.

"Leo, leave it" I sighed

"I said fucking tell me and stop being a little brat!" This time he held no anger back and spat venomously at me.

"How am i being a brat? Eh because i didn't tell you?" i shouted right back, making me throat burn, but I didn't care. "Well we all have secrets. Keeping life changing shit from a person" I spat looking deeply at him. He stared at me with shock. He knew how I was talking about. And who cared if talking about Mariah did hurt him, but it was the truth. She kept Alina from me.

"That's low, Adam. Even for you" He spoke. "You raped her!" he yelled in anger.

"Well I'm sorry. How many fucking times do i need to repeat it?"

"Words never mean much. Actions speak louder than words!" He breathed heavily. "How can you expect her to forgive you or even look at you like a normal guy. Imagine it in this way, some guy, one of your friends raping her in front of you. How would you feel?" I was fuming just imagining someone doing that to her.

"I would beat the shit out of him" I shouted.

"Well to right you would. But now put that 'guy' as you and now look at the mirror reflection of you on top of her. Her face in pain her mouth wide screaming for-"

"SHUT UP!" i cried. I covered my ears crying for what I did. "I'm so sorry" i cried harder, lowering my head in shame. I felt Leos arm wrap around me, but this time not awkwardly. This time i was that little boy who always depended on his brother, and Leo the protective brother. This time I cried all my pain away, hugging my brother to dear life. I missed him so much that now I knew i always needed my brother. My anger towards him blinded me, making me angry at others. He was never to blame or neither was Mariah. All my mistakes in life I had made are now not in black and white but in colour. I knew I had to make it all right.

so what do you think. Things are now cleared both brothers.

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