《Falling For His Nanny [Book #1]》Chapter 32
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Later that same evening, I chose not to mention anything about Levi's late brother unless he decided to bring it up.
I stroked Declan's hair while he slept, his tiny frame snuggled up between me and Levi on the couch.
"Declan doesn't know," Levi murmured, looking away from the TV playing in the background.
"Why not?" I shifted my gaze away from the TV screen and onto him.
"Because he has an uncle. A living one."
I understood where he was coming from, but Declan deserves to know about his uncle whether he's alive or not.
But of course, I didn't press him. Because at the end of the day, Declan was his son. And the decision was his to make.
"I'm going to go put him to bed."
Levi shook his head, grabbing a sleeping Declan and carrying him in his arms. "I got it."
I watched him as he padded across the floor before disappearing up the stairs. Sighing, I turned off the TV and waited for his return.
When he finally returned a few moments later, he sat back down on the couch and laid his head in my lap. Massaging his scalp, I smiled down at him.
Things were finally back to normal. Declan was returned to Levi, his name cleared as Natalie had finally told the truth for once in her life. I was living back in the house, and Natalie was no longer in our lives. At least for now. There's no telling how long she will stay away, even with the money Levi gave her.
"I promise I'm trying."
I blinked away my thoughts, focusing on Levi when I heard his husky voice in my ear. "What do you mean?"
"Doctor Riley told me to be more open, which I was to an extent." He sighed. "I don't like talking about my brother, but I'm willing to do it for you."
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"You don't need to do that for me."
"I want to." Pushing himself back up in to a sitting position, he brushed strands of his dark hair out of his face. "I told Mason not to go that night. I didn't know why, but I just knew that if he went something bad was going to happen. He ignored my plea and promised me he would return. Believing him, I gave up on trying to stop him." He looked down, pure anguish flickering in his eyes. "An hour later he was gone."
"Levi, I'm so sorry."
My heart broke hearing him talk about his brother. I could feel the pain in my chest and the darkness that looms overhead whenever you lose a loved one. It's exactly how I felt after losing my grandfather, who just so happened to suffer from a heart attack a few years before my grandmother did.
"It's okay, really. It's hard, but life without him is getting a little easier to bear."
"Come here." Taking his hand, I led him up the stairs and to his room, which we now share, and got into bed. Instead of letting him hold me like he usually does, I put my arms around him, spooning his larger frame. "It's my turn to hold you."
I kissed his shoulder, our fingers interwoven and our bodies pressed closely together.
"Thank you," I whispered into his shoulder blade.
"For what?"
"For being open with me. I knows it's not an easy thing for you to do, so thank you."
****
"He introduced me to his parents last night. He even told me about his late brother, which I had no clue he had."
Doctor Riley nodded. "That's good to hear. To know that you two are learning to communicate with each other. Now tell me about you."
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"About me?"
"Yes. What are you afraid of?
"Besides spiders? Nothing." He started writing in his notebook and I felt compelled to tell him more, particularly the truth. "I'm afraid of not being enough for them."
"Enough for who?" He asked, his head down as he continued to write in his book of notes.
"Levi and Declan."
"Why do you feel that way?"
"I was never enough for my family," I confessed. "It didn't matter what I did, they were always expecting more."
"And do you think Levi and Declan expect more from you?"
"No."
"Ever since you stepped into their lives you've given them each exactly what they needed. Levi was given a partner who won't ever abandon him, and Declan was given a maternal figure who wants to be in his life. Don't you think that's enough?"
"Yes, but-" When he started to write again, I clamped my mouth shut and really thought about what he was telling me.
Am I enough for them?
Will I be enough for them?
"I love them with my whole heart, doctor. But will my love be enough to give them the life they deserve?"
"If you didn't feel your love for them was enough, then why haven't you left?"
"Because I would never abandon someone I love," I replied, answering with a type a conviction that can only come from the heart.
"Then you have nothing to be afraid of. After all, love really does conquer all Ms. Flynn."
The timer on Doctor Riley's desk rang, indicating that our session had ended. Thanking him, he assured me that I was welcome to make an appointment with him anytime. And that should Levi and I need couple's counseling, he was also available for that as well.
Before heading home, I stopped by the grocery store to pick up a few things. When I returned to my car, I put on my seatbelt and looked up to adjust the rearview mirror.
And as soon as I did, I realized a pair of eyes were staring back at me. I screamed, the hand clamping around my mouth and stifling my petrified cries.
The muzzle of a polished black gun was pressed into the back of my head, my eyes widening.
"Shut up, bitch!" It was a man's voice I heard shouting in my ear. I wasn't certain, but the voice sounded oddly familiar.
I stopped screaming. My hands instantly shot up, my entire body quaking with fear.
The intruder slowly removed their hand, watching my every move with careful caution.
"W-Why are you doing this? What do you want from me?"
It wasn't until I heard him speak again that I realized who the voice belonged to.
"Shut the fuck up and drive!" He growled, digging the gun into the back of my head.
I winced, quickly starting the car and grabbing the steering wheel. "Please don't do this," I begged, fighting back tears.
"Didn't I tell you to shut up!?" He took the gun off safety, his finger teasing the trigger. "Speak again and I'll blow your fucking brains out!" He threatened angrily.
I was certain now.
I know exactly who he is.
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