《Take My Broken Soul》CH 30- Finding a Piece of Her
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It's been about 2 weeks since I finally admitted to my self I'm in love with Lainey. And before you ask, no. I have not told her yet. I honestly don't know why I haven't told her, it just never seemed like the right time.
After their emotional 'girl talk,' Candace and Lainey have been thick as thieves. They are always together gossiping about something or planning their next day out. I love that Lainey has someone she can do that with and she seems to be getting more comfortable with her new life everyday.
I still never got the answers to all my questions, but I decided not to push her. I figure she'll tell me when she's ready and seeing as how she can talk to Candace about everything, I know she's ok. The only times I have pushed her are when something happens and I'm around. Remember the incident with her car? Ya, well she never went to the police and a few more things have happened since then.
One day, the kids were all at friends houses and Lainey and I were sitting in the backyard. It was a nice relaxing day, until a giant brick flew over the fence. The only reason it didn't hit Lainey was because she had just gotten up to get some more water. She blew it off like it was nothing, but I had a bad feeling in my stomach. Then, her car was destroyed again right after we fixed it. We decided to just leave it in the garage and I would take her everywhere. There's also been a couple notes left on the doorstep addressed to her, but she won't let me read them.
I have tried everything to get her to go to the police, but she won't do it. I finally had to stop trying after we got into such a bad fight that she actually started packing her stuff and tried to move out. I don't like that she's going through this, but I'd rather she be here, safe in my house, even if it means I have to drop the subject.
On a more happier note, Wyatt is doing great on Varsity! We have our first game this Friday and I can't wait. I know Laine is nervous about him, but I won't let anything happen. Besides, the quarterback doesn't get roughed around too much so he should be safe. The whole crew is planning on coming to the game. I don't think Katie and Dylan have ever even been to a football game so I'll definitely have to make it a good one.
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We just started winter break, so now I get the kids and Lainey all to myself. We're planning on going up to the snow and doing some other fun things. We have to work around the football practice schedule, though, because we can't miss any leading up to the game. It's not unusual for us to have a game during Christmas break, but I'm definitely bummed that I can't take Lainey on away trip for vacation.
That would have been the perfect time to let her in on how I feel.
Maybe after the football game?
Oh, ya I am definitely winning this football game and then I'm going to finally tell my girl how I feel.
Better hope she feels the same way or you're screwed.
Shut up inner dialogue.
______________________
*5 days later*
It's our first game day! I honestly thought my little crew would be a lot more excited, but that doesn't seem to be the case. Lainey has been in her room most of the day and when she does come out, she looks like she's been crying. I tried getting her to talk to me but she just said she was 'fine' and went back to her room. Wyatt has been a mixture of pissed off and sad. I've kind of just been avoiding him because I figured he's just nervous for the game tonight. Come to think of it, even Katie and Dylan haven't been their normal talkative selves.
Did I do something wrong?
"You didn't do anything wrong, OC." My head is whipped around to see Wyatt standing behind me.
"I said that out loud? " I ask incredulously. He lets out a low chuckle and nods his head.
"Well then if it's not something I did. What's going on? Despite everyone trying to hide it, the mood in this place is somber at best. I don't want to push you guys, but if I know, maybe I can help." I say to him. I watch as his face shows a mixture of grief and anger before he slowly runs his hand through his hair and sighs.
"Our parents died 2 years ago today. It's a really rough day for all of us, although I think the twins are just sad because we are." He replies solemnly.
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"Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't know." I say.
How could I not have known that their parents' death anniversary was today? Jesus I am such a bad boyfriend.
"Not your fault. I'm guessing Lainey never told you. She doesn't talk about it much." Wyatt responds.
"Shoot man, I still should've asked or something sooner. Is there anything I can do?" I ask him with a look of guilt.
"Nah, just give her some time. She usually cries it out and is fine towards the end of the day. Honestly, I think having the game tonight is helping. Gives everyone something to look forward to and kind of take our minds off our parents." He says softly.
"Well, I guess I'll just let her come to me. But, I wasn't just asking about her. How are you doing? I'm guessing you have to be the strong one since she can't be, so what can I do to help you?" I ask him. Wyatt gives me a look like I'm crazy.
"Me? I figured you were just worried about your girlfriend." He asks incredulously.
"Ya, Wy. I care about you three just as much as I do Lainey, just in a different way. What can I do to make your day easier?" I ask again. I watch his face go from shock to appreciation.
"Umm, well thank you. But, you can't really do anything. I'm really just trying to focus on the game tonight and that seems to be helping." He replies.
"Well there we go, then. How about we grab some snacks and watch film in the movie room? It will help keep your mind on the game and I can give you some pointers." I offer to him.
"Really? That would be great, OC. Thanks! I'll go get the popcorn." Wyatt says excitedly before running off into the kitchen. I'm once again startled from a voice behind me.
"Thank you Nate. I've always felt awful that I can't be there for him on this day." I turn to see Lainey talking to me, tears staining her face. I walk over and wrap her in my arms, while she snuggles her face into my chest.
"No problem, Angel. I'm just sorry I didn't know sooner. Why don't you join us? It will help take your mind off of everything." I softly say to her.
"No, you guys go. It will be good for him to have some alone time with you. I'm good, Nate, really. Wyatt was right, I just need to get it out and then I'm ok. Give me like two more hours and I'll be alright." She says, pulling back from my hug.
"You know Angel. You don't always have to be the strong one. You can have a day and just let it out. I'm here to hold you up if you need it." I say with total sincerity.
"I'd love to Nate. But if I let my walls break down and the damn floods. I'll break. This is the only way I know how to cope. I can't risk losing it." She says, looking away from me.
Her words are like a sharp knife stabbing right to my heart. I hate that I can't take this pain from her and that she has to go through this. I grip her chin and force her eyes to look into mine.
"You're not along anymore. I'm here and if you let me, I'll take all your problems and pain." I say, looking into her eyes full of unshed tears.
She doesn't reply, just leans up and gives me a chaste kiss. Then, she turns and walks back to her room.
"Give me your broken soul and I'll fix it, Angel." I whisper to her retreating form before turning and walking to the movie room and Wyatt.
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