When I started realizing there was a world again, the sun was low in the sky, and Adam sat beside me playing his phone. "Miss Winters," he acknowledged when I was awake.

I gazed up to his back. "Beta Hunter," I replied with a timid tease.

His eyes came down to me and smiled.

My lips returned one only slightly.

"You ready to get back to the packhouse? It's almost dinner."

I sat up quick, "Oh I'm sorry, I made you miss...lunch." But then I started blacking out again.

His hand came to steady me. "It's alright. I've missed meals before."

I stayed still for a few moments as the darkness past, then opened my eyes to Adam's searching blues. "I feel bad."

He pointed to the water. "You can't feel bad here remember. This place takes your pains away."

My eyes wanted to tear up again.

But not for the fire?

"Hey, you heard me," he chastised sweetly. His hand came to my chin. "Pains away."

I nodded into his palm and faintly smiled. I blinked the tears back. "I'm okay."

When he was satisfied, he stood and helped me up and back to the truck. We headed back down the road to the packhouse in quiet.

When the packhouse came into view, I whispered. "I don't think I'll go to dinner. You can go without me."

"Miss Winters, you missed lunch too. You need to eat."

I gulped as I saw two ladies walking by. "I'm not hungry."

He followed my glance to the women. "We could eat in my office?"

I looked over to him hopeful.

"We don't have to eat in the mess hall."

I nodded soft. "Okay."

He drove around another bend in the building and stopped the truck in a lot with other vehicles. He again helped me out of the truck and guided me to the doors. I looked at the ground as a group of people and children came out. When they passed, I twisted back slightly to see where they were going and smiled at the playground in the distance.

It reminded me of Timothy.

Maybe I didn't lose everything.

I still had Tim. I still had memories.

Adam held the door for me and walked around a curve and to the second door. "This is my office."

I nodded and followed him in.

It was a small room. Pretty much the size of my bedroom at the farm. There was barely enough floor space to walk around to the shiny black desk. A rich dark and dusty blue hue clung to the walls peeking through the scattered bookshelves. It was fairly tidy with a few knickknacks scattered at the shelves. His desk had a large leather rolling chair and matching sofa out to the front. I sat delicately at the sofa.

"Dinner will be delivered in fifteen minutes."

I nodded and kept looking around at the books. The ones closest to me had titles about werewolf histories and legends. "May I?" I asked pointing to an old book with a silver cover.

"Sure. Anything in here." He motioned around and then sat at the desk.

I started flipping through the book and seeing the phases of the moon and how it affects the wolf's emotions. I skimmed through the pictures of wolf diagrams and read some pages here and there until there was a slight knock and I put the book back into the shelf.

"Enter," Adam called.

A woman with a long golden ponytail and maybe early thirties came in with a cart. "Beta. Elise. Pork Loin and mashed potatoes tonight. Enjoy."

"Thank you," I said timidly.

She gave a full smile and excused herself out.

Adam and I ate in silence. There was no playful banter like when I was with Nate.

"Is Nate okay?"

He looked up to me and nodded. "They're doing well. Cassandra is directing them to come in from another side. He checked in while you were sleeping. He was glad you were able to rest. He wants you to know that you are welcome here for as long as you want to be. He hopes forever."

My stomach tightened. "Maybe."

He nodded and went back to enjoying his plate.

I could only eat a few bites. It tasted lovely, I just had no appetite.

"You should eat more."

I sat back against the couch. "You can finish it. I'm not hungry, and I made you skip lunch."

"You should eat, Miss Winters."

I looked up to him and shook my head. "No thanks, Beta Hunter. Either you eat it, or it goes to waste."

He sighed and pulled my plate to him.

I grabbed a seashell off the bookshelf and started examining it. It was rounded with strong curves and spikes coming from the back. I walked my fingers down the pearlescent points.

"I collected that on a vacation to the beach with my mother and father when I was eleven."

I stopped my touching and placed it back on the shelf. "Sorry."

"I already said you could look at anything here."

"Thanks." I smiled and picked it back up feeling over the smooth curves.

Adam finished the meals and soon the cook was back for the cart. She left two small pie tarts. Adam handed one to me and we ate. It was bright with lemon flavor, the crust perfectly crisp and buttery.

I wiped my hands with a napkin and then placed it in the garbage can beside his desk. I stood and looked around at the book titles and he grabbed a folder with some kind of paperwork and started flipping through it. He started typing the information into his laptop.

I took a large blue book with Shakespeare's Works written across it from the shelf and smiled tenderly. I sat back and started reading one of his earlier plays. The familiarity of a story that I'd read so many times before, starting to fill a hole somewhere within me.

When the late hour chimed, Adam put his papers away and shut off his computer. "I'll escort you back to your room."

I nodded and placed the book back on the shelf.

I followed him through the twists, turns, and stairs. I really should ask for a map. I still haven't asked for an official tour of the maze. I may not find my way back to his office. My nerves built as I hit the last stair before the third floor.

I bit my lip, and my fingers began playing with my nails. He must have heard as my heartbeat sped.

When I saw the moon on my door, my stomach tightened. I yelled out. "I'm cold!" I stared at the door, my face white as snow. "I'm cold. I need you to stay."

It wasn't quite panic.

Alright. Maybe it was.

I looked over and he regarded me, eyes as knowing as ever. Of course he knew I was lying.

My shoulders slumped. "Okay, I'm not. But I can't be alone Adam. My life burned down! Everything I've ever known is gone. I can't face the nightmares. Adam, please. It hurts so bad. You can't go. Please don't leave me alone."

When he stared off, I looked to the doorknob and sighed defeated. I reached for it, and he grabbed it under me. "Would you be able to sleep on the couch again? And with the door open?"

I looked up to him and nodded.

"Then it is approved."

Hope trickled in.

He opened the door and kicked a wedge below to keep it open. Then he turned back to me and rubbed my cheek. "Nate sends his affections. He is sorry he can't be here right now. He will finish things and be back to you soon."

I swallowed my pain down. "Tell him thanks."

He nodded. "Go do what you need to get ready."

I grabbed long sleepwear and headed to the bathroom. I went through a quick night routine and then back out to Adam on the couch. He had pillows set behind his head and back, the comforter against the top of the couch. He had changed into sweatpants and a simple t-shirt.

Then I felt strange, walking to him after begging him to be without his own bed. But when he held his arms out, I almost tripped I stepped up so quickly.

"Lean back against me. Then we'll both be comfortable."

I scooted back at his legs, him against the cushions and arm rest. I let a smile escape. "Sorry about not being comfortable last night then."

His head shook against mine as I laid back to his chest. "It wasn't that bad."

When I situated myself, he tossed the comforter over us and flipped the switch on the lamp beside the couch.

I could feel him relax as his arms came around me. It made me feel like I could actually sleep being cocooned in his safety.

My stings didn't hurt as much.

My head didn't hurt as much.

The loss didn't hurt as much.

It was better with him here. Thank goodness Nate said yes. But I grinned as I imagined what punishments Adam would be in for because of it. He'd probably have to run laps for years.

I fell asleep faster than a sleeping pill.

And I must have slept clear through the night too.

When I started to come around, I realized I was in a different position and that Adam was stroking down my hair. A small flutter of morning light filtered in through the curtains above us. I couldn't believe how well rested I felt with all that had happened. Although it could have been the long nap yesterday too. No nightmares after all. But there was more, I felt calm, content, and protected. Almost happy.

"Miss Winters?"

Sometime during the night I had twisted in Adam's arms, so I was now chest to chest with him. One of my hands tucked between us and my other rounding his neck. My cheek sleepily pressed into his chest. One of his hands was still at my hair, his other arm warm at my back. My face burned with mortification as I realized how I was positioned into him. I was literally clinging into him like my life depended on it. Embarrassing! On Nate's friend!

But yet, I didn't make any motion to move.

"Miss Winters? Would you like to wake up?" Another peaceful stroke down my hair.

No.

I was never going to wake up. This felt too good.

Please don't make me remember the pain of yesterday.

I took a deep breath, my fingers between us twisting into his shirt. He smelled good, it reminded me of his river. I took another purposeful inhale.

"Miss Winters. Nate and the others are on the way back. The war has been won."

I leaned up groggily, but to his eyes. "They won?"

He nodded and smoothed the hair from my face.

I smiled. My hair was probably not very pretty right then and my cheeks seared with humiliating heat. But I couldn't say it wasn't worth it.

No pain.

At least not until I moved. Ow.

"The pack is on the way back now. Everyone is meeting them outside. Do you want to go?"

"Yes. Please." I sat up and stretched.

His arms came over his head in a stretch too.

"Sorry. You're probably pretty stiff. At least I got to move around." Stupid, stupid blush.

He shook his head. "Not a problem. Why don't you go get changed and we'll head down together."

I nodded and stood from the couch. I grabbed a rusty pink color blouse and jean shorts from a drawer and looked back as he replaced my comforter. "Adam?"

"Hm?"

"Thank you. For last night."

A single nod.

I bent shyly, "I'm sorry about clinging into you. But... it helped."

He took the few large steps to me and held my shoulder. "You'll feel better in time. Nate will be able to help you now. Go get dressed."

I nodded hesitantly meeting his eyes and headed to the bathroom.

When I came out a minute later dressed to my tennis shoes, Adam was already there changed into a nice blue print shirt and jeans.

"We should go quickly. They have already arrived."

I smiled and stepped after him. His long strides through the home making me run to catch up. The sting on my ankle itching with every step, but I tried to ignore it.

I followed him around more turns until we were at the front entrance with the large windows. I stopped as I looked through, the early morning sunrays filtering down to the welcome sight. So many people outside all embracing and crying and laughing with happiness that their mates were safe. Even two human women throwing themselves at their wolf companions. The sight made my heart ache for the family I had lost. And a hope fill that maybe Nate's people could be the family I gained. Maybe in time I could be one of the human women waiting for her wolf's safe return.

Adam grabbed around my hand. "Come on. He's out here."

He led me outside through the crowd, and I grinned as I finally caught sight of Nate. He was hugging around a group of ladies, all the voices around me waves of happiness.

Nate's eyes finally caught mine and he gave excuses to the group, a large smile developing across his face.

Quickly, he came to me and held me tight to his chest. I gave a simple smile and hugged close. After a minute of holding, he stood me back and pulled away to arm's length. His hand caressed my cheek. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. I had to go. My wolf was calling for blood."

"It's okay." I continued quickly to cover the lie, "you had to be there for them." My glance moved around to all the other happy couples. "They needed you more than I did."

But my eyes started watering.

The pain of loss now overwhelming.

"Oh, Elise. Sweetheart." He pulled me back strong against him and a small shockwave went through my neck sting. "I'm so sorry about everything." His hand swept my back and he kissed into my hair. "You can stay here forever. You won't ever have to worry about where to live, okay?"

I nodded, the silent tears dropping free.

After a couple deep clearing breaths, and a wipe at my cheeks, I looked around. "Is everyone okay?"

"Mostly yes. We have a few that went right to the infirmary. But we came out on top. Alpha Milo is drafting his surrender and treaty as we speak."

"I'm happy for you."

"People are starting to head for breakfast. Did you want something to eat?"

I started looking around the thinning crowd. "No, I think I'll just head back to my room." I still wasn't feeling good enough to be around so many.

"I'll come with," he added hastily.

"No, you go enjoy the win with your pack. I'll be okay for a while."

"You're sure?"

"Yeah, absolutely. Could you just show me to the stairs first? I can find my way after that."

"Of course." He grabbed my hand and started dodging me through halls.

When we ended up at the staircase, he turned back. "Are you sure you don't want me there? I'm happy to have breakfast with you."

I shook my head sad. "No, I'm not hungry. Please go have something and be with everyone. You led them to victory. They need you."

He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'll be up soon, okay?"

"Yeah," I turned and headed up the stairs.

I know I said I wanted him to go, but a part of me still hoped he'd follow anyway. But he just watched until I turned out of sight.

When I was alone, stronger tears fell from my eyes, and my arm started burning. When I got to the third-floor landing, I started to cringe at the itching stings.

I opened into the Luna room and went right to the bathroom. I started unwrapping the bandages from my stings and cuts.

The stings were looking better. Still violet streaking surrounded heavy bruises, but the veins only showed about half of what it was yesterday. I pressed into the swelling bruises trying to feel some relief from the itch without actually scratching them.

They needed honey.

But then my eyes filled with a fresh round of tears.

The hive.

My bees!

Oh no, they were gone. I'd no longer have the wolfsbane cure. I'd never again make strong cakes.

It was almost more heartbreaking than losing the house.

I guess it was a good thing Milo was signing a treaty. I'd never again be able to make my special baking for them. I was back to being a mediocre baker.

I leaned against the counter and let the sobs enter my voice as well.

Everything was gone.

I wished I hadn't left my grandfather's shirt in the truck. I wanted to hold it right now. Hold something of my past.

After minutes of weeping continued, I figured I needed to check the rest of my sores. I used a washcloth to wet over the remaining stings and rinse the caked blood around the nail cuts. They were finally scabbing over. I didn't have any extra gauze in the cabinet above the sink, so I just let it to air. When Nate came back he could have someone bring a fresh bandage for it. The stings should be fine without now, just ugly.

I just sat on the side of the tub and felt the overwhelming exhaustion take hold of me. The pain and loss burrowing into my being like digging insects.

I twisted to the faucet and turned on the tub. I just let the water run free. It was a waste, but the flow reminded me of the river. I put my fingers in and tried to imagine Adam's place where pain slides away.

"Elise?" Nate knocked loud enough I heard it over the water.

I turned the faucet off and stepped into the main room. "Come in," I said gently.

He cautiously opened the door and then came inside, Adam on his heels holding a handful of files.

"You taking a bath?" Nate looked toward my feet, noticing my shoes still on.

"No," I said softly looking to Adam. I couldn't explain just wanting to listen to running water.

Adam's eyes then went to my arm, and he frowned.

Nate sighed. "You took off the bandages." He stepped to me and took my left arm into his hands, examining it. His brow came down. "You need to go back to the doctors."

I stepped away and sat on the edge of the bed. "I'm alright."

Nate followed me and touched at my forehead. "Elise, you're burning up."

I was starting to feel warm again. It must have been all the walking around. I didn't feel fevered last night.

"It's nothing." My voice was quiet.

"I'll have someone bring you some more pain pills."

"Sure." Though I wouldn't take them. At least the stings covered up the pain inside. I couldn't take medicine for grief.

"Don't bother," Adam spoke softly to Nate.

I glanced to Adam and then sighed to the floor.

Nate sat next to me and wrapped me in a hug. "You'll be okay Elise. Things will work out."

"I know," I leaned into him.

He sat back to look at me, arm still caressing my back. "We need to be in council meetings today. We'll have to leave for a while. Will you be okay on your own?"

I nodded.

"I'll call Danielle to stay close. You can ask her for anything okay?"

"Yeah."

He stood. "I don't know how long we'll be. Usually treaties take time. Maybe all day with the back and forth paperwork. But I'll come to see you as soon as I'm done. At least for bedtime."

I nodded.

He reached down and squeezed my hand. "We'll be back, okay? Eat something." He stepped for the door.

Adam stayed behind and held something out to me. I looked up to him and then noticed it was my grandfather's shirt wrapped around the blue Shakespeare book I was reading last night.

"Thank you," I said softly and genuinely as I took them from him, then held them to my heart.

Adam's voice was low and comforting, "they are baking cupcakes in the kitchens. I'm sure they could use some help frosting if you feel like going anywhere today."

A small smile lifted my cheeks. I did like frosting.

He nodded, then followed Nate to the door and both were out.

I laid down on the bed, clutching the two items to my chest as I buried myself deep into the soft pillow. My grief drowning me.