《What's Your Diagnosis, Doc?》Chapter 47 - Talking and Friends
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"Ava!" I heard Jordi call, causing me to turn around with along with Gabe.
Jordi ran excitedly towards me and hugged me tightly. I was so happy to see her looking so happy and healthy, completely unlike the last time I saw her.
"Jordi! Hey! How was the flight?" I asked with a smile.
That's when I noticed Noah walking over a little less enthusiastically. I didn't really know how I felt about this. I mean, I just didn't understand why he had to come with Jordi. She'd be fine without him for a few days.
As soon as he arrived, he smiled awkwardly at Gabe and then at me, hiding behind Jordi.
"I think we should all find a place to sit and talk real quick." Noah said.
"Why?" Gabe asked, making me take his hand and squeeze it. Neither of us were sure about having Noah around.
"I need to clear the air. I know that neither of you want me here and I think I should maybe... like explain myself." He said.
"I'm fine with that if Ava is." Gabe said.
I nodded my head, leading us towards a little café within the airport. We all sat down at one of the tiny tables and Noah sighed before he began to talk.
"You know, Ava. Everything that happened was my fault, and I was a complete idiot." He said to me. "I never approached you because I knew you were Jordi's friend and I didn't want to hurt you or Jordi. I think that deep down, I always knew that Jordi was the one I wanted... and I was never able to push myself to ask her to be mine. Then she began her first relationship and I knew I'd lost her in that sense."
I nodded, allowing him to continue.
"I never thought of you as a woman I wanted to be in a relationship with... Although you are pretty, I just didn't see you like that." He said. "I slept around because it was the cool thing to do and it didn't really matter to me once I'd done it enough... it was the wrong thing to do and deep down, I totally knew that."
I nodded, not wanting to interrupt him and not knowing what to say either.
"Then my parents wanted to set me up with you and that's the first time I thought of you as a girl that I could be with romantically. Suddenly, the idea appealed to me and I know that you'll never believe this, but I actually did change for you. The things I did, I meant... I really liked you, Ava, as a friend at least... I don't think I ever loved you, because then I wouldn't have found it in be to go through with cheating. But I did change at the beginning. I wanted to be good for you, I wanted to be successful and give you the future you deserved." He said.
"Then why'd you ruin it, or at least, what changed?" I asked in confusion.
"I was stupid. I just... I was frustrated, Ava. Because there you were, everyone was telling me how great you were from me, how I was so useless and then I had you and suddenly I was so much better, and it bothered me. We weren't even that intimate and you know that. We didn't do anything, anytime I tried kissing you properly, you hated it. And there I was realizing that I was with a girl that was too good for me. And that's the case, you were too good for me." He said.
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"What? Noah, that's..." I started, not liking how he said I was too good for him. That wasn't the right way to think.
"No, I know it was messed up to think like that, but I cheated on you and proved that it was true. I just wanted to feel like for once, I had the upper hand." He told me.
"Ok... that was messed up... I can't say it really hurt though... I don't care about all that. It just bugs me that you tried to degrade me, told all my friends about things you knew I was insecure about and had them all turn on me. And then like seven years later you called me from like ten different numbers, and then you actually showed up here and asked me to be with you." I said in annoyance.
"I know... and I was still an idiot... after you and I broke up, I started realizing that you were such a good girlfriend, and what I said about you being a bad wife was so far from the truth. You did so much for me and I never appreciated it or even bothered noticing it until you were gone. And when you left Canton, I just wanted you back. I tried getting other girlfriends, but none of them treated me like you did. You took care of me, you did so much for me, and I'm so thankful for that, Ava. I'm sorry about what I did to you, and how I hurt you and the lack of respect that I had." He said to me.
"I forgive you, Noah... I don't feel the need to hold a grudge." I said to him.
"Ok, I want this to just not be awkward, ok? I'm so happy that you ended up with this guy. I mean, he literally sat there beside you while you talked it out with me, your jerk of an ex boyfriend, and he didn't try to interfere. He knows what you're worth, Ava. I'm happy for you guys, congratulations on the engagement." He said with a smile.
Gabe and I nodded, smiling. I knew that no matter what, Gabe wouldn't be ok with Noah or his presence. He had already told me that he didn't want him anywhere near either of us. But, I felt like Gabe at least appreciated that he had realized how wrong he was and he had the decency to apologize. He really was sorry about what he'd done and that was a good thing.
"Now, I get that this is extremely awkward, but I just couldn't let Jordi travel here all by herself. I worry that something will happen to her, but here she is, I trust you, Ava. You guys have your fun, I'll be in the hotel." Noah said.
Jordi was looking down at her hands and she seemed to be really conflicted. She did love Noah, but she knew that after what he'd done, this wasn't enough for me and him to be around each other and have things be normal.
"No, uhm.... It's fine if you want to like... stay with us." I said, knowing Jordi might want that or feel more comfortable and safe around him.
"No, Ava. Even if you could forgive me, I will never forgive myself for the things I've done in the past." He told me. "Just enjoy your time guys, as long as Jordi has a good time, I'm happy. If you need anything, I'll be at the hotel." He said, kissing Jordi on her forehead.
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"Ok." I nodded.
"Oh, and Gabriel... right?" Noah asked Gabe, making him nod. "I realize you're the man who told me to stop calling her and the man that sat with her while I attempted to get her back... I just want to say I admire you and how you respect Ava. Part of me only realized how stupid I was when I saw what I should've been doing for my partners. So, thanks for showing me how a man should really act and I'm sorry about how I treated Ava, especially in your presence. I know I'd never tolerate something like that with Jordi, so just thank you for not killing me."
Gabe nodded his head with a chuckle. I knew Gabe didn't hate Noah, Noah wasn't necessarily a bad person, he was just disrespectful and toxic in the past. But now he'd realized his mistakes and recognized that he needed to change and back off.
Jordi and I could have a good time now without worrying about anything happening to us. Noah walked off and went to check into the hotel. When we got into the car, Jordi quietly asked me where Gabriel would be while we were hanging out.
"Do you want me to make him leave us alone?" I asked her.
"No, can he stay at least nearby so he can come if we need anything?" Jordi asked.
"Sure, are you feeling ok?" I asked her.
"I just always feel like I'm being watched and about to get found by him... Noah usually just goes everywhere with me, so I'm used to having the comfort of a stronger person nearby." She said.
"Alright. He'll be maximum two minutes away at all times, ok? Nothing will happen to us." I said to her, giving her a hug.
"Thanks, Ava." Jordi smiled.
I smiled and Gabe drove us to the mall, I made sure to tell him to stay close in case we needed him, and if anyone was good at being around but invisible, it was Gabe. He would respect our privacy but also be right there to help out if we needed him.
I saw him standing in the store across from us at all times, looking at a few things and then waiting for us to go to another store and following behind us when he needed to. He even bought us some drinks and cinnamon buns. Jordi thought he was super sweet and told me he was absolutely perfect for me.
We had an amazing time, we went shopping, then we went on a hike with Gabe in front of us, maintaining a good distance so that we could have our privacy.
After that, it was time for some lunch. We went and dropped some food off for Noah and then we went and sat down somewhere for a picnic. Gabe took a call and walked back to the car. He told us to call him immediately if we needed anything and I nodded.
"He's really sweet." She smiled at me. "And you two are going to get married soon, huh?" She asked me.
"Yeah. we're hoping to get married sometime this summer and then have the honeymoon in August." I smiled.
"That's amazing. And then you guys can have the most adorable children this world has seen." She smiled excitedly.
"Actually, children weren't a part of our plan." I said.
"Really? But I thought he was a teacher, so he loves children, doesn't he? Why wouldn't he want them?" She asked me in confusion.
"It's not him... I'm the one who made that decision." I said.
"Ava, you're joking, you love children. Remember when we always talked about when we'd have kids?" She asked me.
"I remember, but that was before I became a doctor and realized that I would never have enough time to give my kid the attention they needed." I said to her.
"No, Ava. Unacceptable... does he know you feel this way?" She asked me.
"Yeah. I told him I wouldn't have enough time to care for our kid." I told her.
"Ava... does he know that at one point in time, all you could think about was your future with your husband and children?" She asked me.
"No." I sighed.
"Ava!" Jordi exclaimed.
"I know that he's disappointed because I said I didn't want kids, there's no need to make him even more upset about it... I can't neglect my child, Jordi, so I might as well not have one." I said.
"Ava! You want a kid, so have one. And don't neglect it." She groaned.
"I have so much work. I literally only have two free days a week." I said to her, making her give me an unimpressed look.
"Since when does Ava Dara let anything get in her way of getting what she wants?" Jordi asked me.
"Since she realized she's a human being and a baby is a human being too and I can't ruin a kids life because of my selfish desires to be a mother." I sighed.
"Ava! I understand that some people just don't want children, and they'd rather focus on their career and their relationships and not worry about a kid. But I know you, Ava, and you have always wanted to be a mother." Jordi said to me.
"Part of me still wants that... especially because Gabe would be the most amazing father. But I can't Jordi. I can't just take all that time off work." I said.
"Oh I see, you're afraid that everyone was right, that Ava couldn't do it. She couldn't be a doctor like she said she would be." Jordi said.
"That was harsh." I chuckled nervously.
"Ava! Are you serious?! You already are a doctor, and an amazing one at that... you've already proved everyone wrong by getting that degree and the title of doctor. Take some time off, years if you have to... or just work at the clinic and drop your hours at the hospital. Then at least you can be more flexible... you can always go back to your career after your babies are more independant... come on, Ava. You and I both know you have lots of time on your hands now anyway on your days off." She said to me.
"I guess if I dropped my hospital hours and took a few more clinic shifts, I'd get a flexible schedule that allowed for me to look after a kid..." I said, seeing that I was being a little too paranoid about this.
"Exactly. You've always been great at managing your time, Ava. And I've never seen you allow other people's views affect the way you live your life." She said to me.
"I want a kid." I finally admitted.
"Good. Tell your fiancé about that please." She chuckled.
"I will... just not now." I said.
"Not now, fine... but promise that as soon as I leave, you'll sit down when you have time and have a very long and detailed conversation with Gabriel about your honest opinion about kids." She said to me.
"Ok, I promise... but I could live without kids." I said.
"Anyone can live without kids, Ava. But you're engaged to be married to a man who would be an amazing father and on top of that it's been a lifelong dream of yours to raise a little one." She said to me.
"You're right. I never should've let what people have said to me in that past interfere with how I chose to live my life." I smiled.
"I'm really proud of you, Ava. For achieving all your dreams... I would never want you to let go of this one very important dream." Jordi smiled, pulling me into a hug.
I smiled, feeling very happy with the fact that Jordi had knocked some sense into me. I had always wanted kids, I just knew I couldn't put anything before my child and I was worried I'd end up doing that. But I knew now, that I was being stupid. Taking time off didn't mean I couldn't handle my career, it just meant that my life was successful enough that my career wasn't the only thing that mattered, and I was happy about that.
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