《Plutonian》Chapter 23
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I have never worn a breather suit before, having never needed one. The moment I press on the small patch that activates my suit I can feel something gliding over my skin. I look at my covered hands and legs, waving my fingers in the air.
Nothing looks different but it feels weird. The odd sensation slides up my neck and then onto the only exposed part of my body which is my face. The moment it goes over my nose I find myself unable to breathe but the panic I feel is fleeting because it only lasts a few seconds.
I run my hands over my face as Lucian leads us further and further into what seems like an endless space of grey-blue nothingness. My skin still feels uncovered and yet I am somehow protected from the uninhabitable atmosphere.
I marvel at the intelligence behind the suit I am in until we come face to face with a large cluster of light colored rocks that form a high wall in front of us. I expect us to stop somewhere here seeing as there is no where else to go but Lucian speeds ahead towards the rocks.
My eyes widen in fear and I instinctively dig my fingers into his sides where I am holding him.
"Lucian," I begin but I stop short when I see a hidden crack in between two slabs of rock. Lucian heads right through it and avoids an oncoming jagged edge with such ease that I realize he must have gone through this narrow space quite a few times.
Up close I can see that the rocks are not just dull grey blue like they seemed from a distance. I notice small splashes of peach and purple intermixed with each other and I can't help but stare in awe.
We go further and further inside and once we reach a much wider area Lucian finally stops. I get off Lucian's rider and stare at my surroundings wordlessly.
It seems the crack has lead us to a small open space with a ledge at it's end. I walk over it and the view beyond takes my breath away. It feels like we are at the edge of the planet and all I can see before me is the star filled sky and a sea of nothingness below.
This sky is similar to the one in Lucian's room but somehow it is much more beautiful. Numerous golden specks litter a dark background that has been splashed with numerous colors of black, orange and purple.
I cannot believe that I am staring right into outer space.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" Lucian murmurs from beside me and I turn to see him staring at the vast expanse of space beyond us.
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I can only nod my head in response as I try to take everything in like a sponge. I wish I could capture this image and replace it with the one of Michael.
My fingers tingle with hope as I imagine myself flying through this image towards where I truly belong. I look at the all the shiny dots, wondering which one is Earth.
"How did you find this place?" I ask Lucian.
"I drove past the Eastern atmosphere when I got my first glider," Lucian says as he sits by the ledge overlooking the dark chasm beyond us. ""Didn't find much there. I started exploring the Western atmosphere soon after. That's when I found this place. It's been my spot ever since."
"I didn't know we were allowed to leave the protective atmosphere," I wondered out loud.
"Well you're not. But all military personnel are allowed to with proper clearance."
I don't remember us going through any checkpoints before leaving the protective atmosphere. I frown as I walk over to him cautiously. I am afraid to slip and fall over the ledge into the darkness below.
Lucian catches my frown and immediately reads my mind.
"The Trinity don't need clearance."
"Oh," I reply. Of course they don't.
Unlike Lucian, who has his legs dangling over the ledge, I sit down next to him and tuck my feet under me feeling more secure that way.
"Are you the only person who has been here?" I ask him as I stare at the open sky again. There was something oddly peaceful about seeing such vastness when I had always felt so trapped.
"I'm not sure if there are others who have been here before. But I haven't seen anyone else so far. It isn't normal for people to spend time here, due to the strict protocols we have for our borders."
"So only the Trinity would be allowed here?" I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear and look at Lucian's face. He looks so relaxed and less tired than he did before.
"Yes, but I've only ever brought Luna here. This place is special to me so I've kept it rather private, Lazarus doesn't know about it and I prefer to keep it that way," Lucian smiles as he mentions Luna but his expression turns sour when Lazarus's name leaves his lips.
The way his eyes sparkle when he speaks of Luna makes me wonder if there is more to their relationship than I know of but when he mentions Lazarus I am immediately angered and worried at the same time.
Thinking about him makes me wonder again why he hates me so much and I just have to ask.
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"Lucian, can I ask you something about Lazarus?"
He nods his head as he eyes me. "Ask away. We came here to talk remember. This is our safe space."
For some reason my heart softens at his words and my chest feels warm and fuzzy as I realize he has brought me to a place so private and special to him. The trust I have for him grows and I carry on with my question.
"Do you know if Lazarus hates me? I don't understand why he made me watch...that match. And now there are new horrible rules where we fighters have to watch all death sentence matches and I don't understand why? All I did was refuse to dance with him. I never expected it to go this far..." I ramble on until Lucian brings his hand to my shoulder to silence me and calm me down.
"He doesn't hate you, Aria. He hates me," He explains as I stare at him in confusion. "Well not so much hate, more like sibling rivalry. We grew up together, Luna, him and I and the older we grew the more differing our views became. I don't see the world like Lazarus does and he has never liked it."
Lucian releases my shoulder and stares ahead as he speaks.
"We were like brothers when we were younger. When Lazarus had his first kill, he was a natural but there has always been a violence he never could control and it made him less reliable when it came to being a leader. I on the other hand struggled to fit into our role as future generals of the army. My first kill was a horrible experience for me and I have always found ways to avoid unnecessary loss of life."
Lucian leans back and rests on his palms as he explains more.
"When we were finally old enough to join and participate in war council meetings, Lazarus was always for war and I was always against it unless absolutely necessary. Sometimes our difference in opinions would proceed to full on arguments. Sometimes he won, sometimes I did but he always saw me as a coward and I always found him reckless and selfish."
"But he is going to be the highest in command once he marries Luna? Why would he hate you when he will be in the position of highest power?" I ask Lucian.
"Because the Trinity are a unit and the generals vote on all war related decisions. It is our way of preventing dictatorship and Luna has always shared my viewpoints more than his," He explains. "Granted he will have the highest authority but all his decisions will require a vote from the Trinity, the generals and the war council."
"But why is he taking his anger out on me?" I eye Lucian and then the answer hits me. "He knows about us, doesn't he?"
Lucian nods his head solemnly. "Yes, he does. He thinks we are lovers and he thinks I chose you just to spite him because of how you treated him at the ball."
My heart slowly sinks to my stomach as I realize I am about to be collateral damage in a game between two powerful rivals. Lazarus can't harm Lucian because of his position but he can certainly take his anger out on me.
"Did you choose me because of that?" My voice comes out quiet. Maybe Lucian isn't as nice as I thought he was.
"No, Aria. I chose you not because you angered him but because you weren't enamored by him. Like I said, amongst the few he has bothered to approach there have been none who acted the way you did. To put it simply, I saw someone I could potentially trust."
I accept his answer in silence but I still have that shadow of a doubt that he is using me to make Lazarus mad.
"Now it's my turn to ask you something," Lucian breaks me from my thoughts.
I stare up at him confused, wondering what he could possibly need to know from me.
"I need you to tell me about the nightmares you used to have. Did talking about them really make them go away?"
"Yes, I remember feeling better every time I told my mother what the nightmare was about," I replied. "Is this about your night terrors? Are they nightmares?"
"Not so much nightmares," Lucian pauses for while looking unsure of himself. "It is Plutonian culture to never divulge our fears to others. It is a sign of weakness."
My heart thumps in my chest as I lean forward eager to force it out of him. If talking about them would heal his night terrors I would finally be able to get a good night's sleep. I bit my lip wondering how to coax him into something he is so hesitant about.
"But I'm not Plutonian, so this culture doesn't apply to me," I answer truthfully. "And maybe if you told me about what you did, it will help me deal better with Michael's death."
My last few words seem to do the trick because Lucian's shoulders slump in defeat and he sighs loudly.
"Okay, but you must promise to keep this between us. Always." He says and I nod my head and then he finally admits what he has been hiding from me all this while.
"It all started after my first kill. I was twelve years old at the time."
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