"I'm coming Cam... God I-"

That's when I almost said it. What the fuck?

"...that was so good."

I don't mean it, do I? No, she just gives good head. I'm lying, it's not just head. She's amazing, she's my best friend. But I can't say it. Not if I don't know if I mean it.

I grabbed her neck, kissing her again, hoping I can express myself through the kiss instead of words. This is a terrible idea, what are we doing? What am I doing? I thought I'd be able for just benefits, I do this all the time with girls, but doing it with someone I'm already close with is either the best or worst idea I've ever had.

*

"Sleep over?"

I can't let her leave now. I don't want her to go and part of me is scared that she'll go on another late night date with Matt. And- my family's never home anymore, she's all the company I've got.

"It's Monday, we have school tomorrow."

"So? We go to the same school, I can give you a ride."

"I don't have my books or uniform."

"Go get everything you need now. Becca left half her hair and makeup stuff here if you need anything, my parents aren't home and I'll make us breakfast."

"Ugh you're so-"

"So what?" I smiled, knowing I've won.

"You always get your own way."

"I do. I'll make hot chocolate while you're gone."

"Fine."

I sat back and admired her as she got dressed, blowing me a kiss before she left the room.

I pulled myself out of bed and slipped on my boxers and clothes before heading downstairs to the kitchen and making us hot chocolate.

I heated the chocolatey milk and waited for her to come back. She's taking longer than I'd hoped and I'm kind of expecting a text saying 'can't come back, sorry'.

Twenty minutes later she came in with her bags, "I'm so sorry, I was talking to Zoe."

"No problem." I poured the steaming drink into our mugs and added cream and marshmallows.

"She goes back to work tomorrow."

"Does that mean your house will be empty more often?"

"Maybe..."

We took everything back to my room and closed the door behind us, slumping back into the bed again.

We sat silently on my bed and I dipped my finger tip into the cream, scooping some up before wiping it on Cami's nose and lips.

She raised her eyebrows accusingly at me, looking down at her nose but not wiping it off.

"Sorry, let me help you with that."

I placed my cup down and cupped her cheek and wiping it off her nose with my thumb and onto her lips before pulling her face to mine, sucking the sweet cream off her lips.

I took her mug from her hands and placed it beside mine before going back to kiss her again. My lips were centimetres from reconnecting with hers when she placed her finger to my lips. "Nope, we keep our clothes on tonight."

"Fine, we'll stay dressed, I promise."

I moved her hand and pinned it to the bed, kissing her again. She eased into it and added her tongue to my mouth.

My hand gripped her neck and my other slipped to her thigh, pulling her on top of me.

"We don't want to give you blue balls again."

"But I love your solutions so much."

"Not tonight."

"Clothes on, I promised."

I moved to her neck and suck on the tender skin while she straddled me. My hands slipped under her hoodie and unhooked her bra. My fingers snaked around to cup her breasts, squeezing them firmly before softly pinching her nipples, earning me a sweet moan from her.

I pulled away from her neck and watched her roll her eyes, relaxing under my touch. Her bottom lip was tight in between her teeth and she rocked slightly, her hands running through my hair. "Theo-"

"Yeah?"

"...Our drinks are going cold."

She lowered her hands a pulled mine from under her hoodie. I gave her another kiss as she climbed off my lap, fixing her bra while I picked our drinks back up.

"Ok fine, wanna watch tv?"

"Yeah."

We flicked through the channels and ending up watching 'friends'.

We shuffled closer and my hand accidentally fell onto her thigh. She turned to me and gave me a small but serious smile, "No."

"I'm not doing anything." I smirked back, "clothes on, remember?"

"Mhm." She mumbled, moving my hand as she turned back to the tv.

"Ouch."

I moved my arm behind her, resting it on the pillows we were lay against. I don't normally hug or cuddle or whatever, but I like holding her close to me, I just like knowing she's there.

My hand fell to her shoulder, holding it softly so we can ease into it.

She turned to me and gave me a smile before leaning on my chest. "Since when do we cuddle?"

"Since when do we kiss?"

"Touché."

Her hand fell flat on my chest and my hand rubbed her arm.

"You're being very affectionate tonight."

"Is that bad? I know you like being degraded but I thought you'd at least accept a hug."

"Shut up, I wasn't complaining, just stating."

"Mhm yeah ok."

"I hate you."

"No you don't."

We lay silently watching the tv for a while. My arm went dead but I couldn't pull myself to move it. She eased into my body more and I glanced down to see her eyes closed.

"Are you asleep?" I whispered almost inaudibly.

I got no response so I switched off the tv and tried to fall asleep myself, twirling her soft hair in my fingers as she exhaled heavily on my chest.

*

"Shit." I woke up to Camila stirring on my arm, "what time is it?"

"Shh go back to sleep."

I waited a second before opening my eyes. She stared up at me, her breath heavy on my neck. "Can you move your leg, please?"

I glanced down to see my leg wrapped over both of hers. "I'm comfy."

"Please?"

"No, go back to sleep."

"I'm getting a shower." She slipped out of my grasp, placed my leg and arms on the bed where she was just lay. She picked up her bag of clothes and disappeared into the bathroom, "you promised me breakfast!"

I collected myself and rolled over to check my phone before getting out of bed. I had a couple notifications but non of which were important, and it's only just gone 6 am so we have plenty of time before school.

I stumbled downstairs and poured myself a glass of water while I got out everything I need to cook breakfast.

Although I craved his touch I knew we couldn't do anything last night. Well, shouldn't. We're not going to be able to stay friends if we only do the benefits side of things, and I don't want to let go of the actual friendship.

Although there's so many holes, so many things that could go wrong here, everything is better. We're more comfortable, we don't keep secrets or act odd.

We're closer, I literally fell asleep in his arms. He doesn't do that. He doesn't show affection, he doesn't hug. The only time we've ever come close to hugging is when Zoe made us for a photograph on our first day of high school.

But we're still friends. We still have hot chocolate and sleepovers and laugh or watch tv like we've always done.

The cold water of his shower woke me up as I ran my fingers through my hair. I'm so glad I went home to get my stuff so now Theo's bathroom smells like vanilla instead of his three-hundred in one shower gel.

My fingers got caught in what I thought was a knot but when I inspected it I realised it was some sort of plait, with twists and too many strands of hair. I giggled to myself, realising it was probably Theo.

I turned off the shower and wrapped a towel around me, patting myself dry and squeezing the water out of my hair. I slipped on some clean underwear and my school uniform, putting a hoodies over it so my hair doesn't soak my shirt.

I headed downstairs and the smell of pancakes hit me before I reached the first step.

"It smells amazing."

"What can I say?"

I reached the kitchen to see Theo setting the table with different pancake toppings as pancakes sizzled in the pan.

His music played quietly in the background as he placed two plates of pancakes on the kitchen table, sitting down across from me.

"It looks great, thank you."

"Thank you for staying."

We added chocolate syrup and berries to our pancakes before eating. "What classes do you have today?"

"You're in my first, third, fourth and sixth period."

"Good... have you spoken to Matt?" He stuffed his face with his pancakes and only flicked his eyes to meet mine before looking away again.

"No, I've been with you since school yesterday."

"Oh, I thought you might have texted him or something."

"Nope."

"Oh."

"Mhm." I tried to shut down the conversation, not wanting to talk to Theo about Matt.

"He went to basketball training yesterday."

"How was it?"

"It was good, he has tryouts this week so..."

"Was he any good?"

"He was alright, he won't be captain any time soon."

"Will you?"

"I want to be, but it's a long shot."

"You've got it, you're the best on the team."

He chuckled softly and ignored the compliment. "What about you?"

"Nah, Katie's definitely got it."

"Are you trying for it?"

"I'm not sure if I will."

"You should. Imagine us both as captains."

We finished breakfast and cleaned up after ourselves, filling the dishwasher with the plates and wiping the pancake batter off the table.

We slipped back upstairs and Theo jumped in the shower as I snook into Rebecca's room. It's still as perfectly clean as when she was here. She used to do my nails when we were younger, and said I was the little sister she always wanted.

I sat in front of her mirror and plugged in the hairdryer, drying my damp hair.

I was almost finished when I spotted Theo leaning against the doorway with just a towel around his waist. "My whole bathroom smells of you."

"Sorry about that." I smirked at him through the mirror.

"I wasn't complaining, just stating."

I stuck out my tongue when I realised he was quoting me.

"You find everything you need?"

"Yeah, I'm almost done."

"Perfect, I'll go get dressed."

"Hey Theo?" I called for his as he was about to leave the room. "Did you try to plait my hair when I was asleep?"

"What?" His face when bright red, "must have done it subconsciously, sorry."

"Don't worry, I was just wondering."

He slipped out of the room and I brushed my hair through before putting on some lip balm and mascara. I took off the hoodie and put on my tie, slipping my school shoes on and then waited for Theo.

We locked the door and hopped into his car, singing to the radio as we headed to school.