This time I'm the one to look away and focus on my work again. I hear something ringing in my ears. So I decide to take my earphones out to listen a bit closer. And then there is an intense pain in my chest. It's that song. It's 'wonderwall' by oasis. The song my mom used to adore. It was her favourite song. I haven't listened to that song since that day and I wasn't ready to listen to it at all for quite some time yet. I feel the tears stinging in my eyes as I look at the person next to me. Why does Jason have his earphones so loud???? My heart starts beating like crazy and I can't seem to take a steady breath. Oh no. I think I'm gonna have a panic attack. The song is still ringing in my ears, it won't stop. I try to calm down, I don't want to draw any attention to me, but I can't help it. The tears are now falling down my cheeks and there is no way of stopping them. Nobody notices yet, but if I don't go now I'm definitely gonna make a scene. And that would draw a whole lot of attention. It feels like I just ran a marathon. I need to get out of here. Right now. I hurriedly put all my stuff back in my bag, stand up and throw my backback over my shoulder. And walk out of class. I hear Mr. Erwin calling my name, but I don't even bother. I walk to the schooldoors very fast.

Finally. I'm outside. I'm alone. And I can have some fresh air. I walk around the corner and slide myself down the brick school wall. My breath is still unsteady and my heart is all over the place, but I'm alone. So it's gonna be okay. The song is still in my head, I'm unconsciously repeating the lyrics in my head. Until I'm interrupted by a familiar voice.

"You look like you need a smoke." I look up and see Ashlyn looking down at me, with this same expression I still I can't figure out. This is the first time she has ever said anything to me. I can't bring myself to say anything. She sits down next to me and lights a cigarette. She points the cigarette towards me, as if asking me if I wanted some. She was waiting for me to say something, all I did was shake my head no. "More for me I guess." she says while taking a hit of the cigarette in her hand.

We have been sitting here in silence for a couple of minutes now. Weirdly, I noticed that my panic stopped. I can breathe and the tears have stopped. Is it because she's here? Whatever it is it's better than a full on panic attack. I smell the scent of the cigarette Ashlyn is enjoying so much. I always found it to be a gross smell, but it feels oddly comforting.

Ashlyn suddenly stands up and throws her finished cigarette on the ground and stomps her foot onto it. She starts walking away, but then turns around and looks at me. "I guess I'll see you around, goodie two shoes." She turns around and walks away. I internally groan at the stupid nickname.