《MC's Viking Warriors- Mouse #2》Derek
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Finally, I've got it all off my chest, I've told her the truth and she accepts me for it. I am still waiting for Elle to talk to me, she's just sitting in silence at the moment, stroking those teasing nails up my arm as she traces the tattoos I have etched on my skin. She seems to just be processing what I have told her, dealing with a lot of information all at once.
I am hopeful that once I know more about Elle's past, I can protect her from more than just a beating. I can help heal her, every inch of pain that man of hers caused her, I can melt away the insecurities once I know.
"Elle, baby? If you're not ready yet, I'm not going to force you to tell me a thing. We can stay as we are now. I won't mind."
Her tense body relaxes into mine, moulding her curves to fit against my tougher form.
"It's ok Der, I need to tell you."
I throw my head against the headboard in relief before leaning back down to kiss her hair in reassurance.
"I had, I suppose what you would call, a happy childhood. At the very least it was a happy childhood to those looking in. My mother was cold, she wanted perfection from both me and my brother. My father was distant with ambition so left all parenting to my mother. I was constantly left with the overwhelming feeling of failure, the feeling that I was a disappointment.
In many ways, it makes sense I ended up with who I did. My mother hated the way my body looked when I hit puberty, but no matter what diet she put me on I didn't lose weight. It's just my body type I guess. But she hated it."
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Elle pauses for a second before inhaling deeply, my arms tighten around her waist as I try to comfort her. It pains me to hear that for so long there have been people who should have loved her that instead abused their influence over her.
"My brother was 2 years older than me. I loved- love him with all my heart. He was kind and gentle, he protected me from the worst of my mother's wrath and hatred."
I bury my face in her neck at the use of the past tense, it can only mean one thing.
"He died in a car accident when I was 15. It was so brutal, over so quickly. I- I couldn't believe life could be so cruel, I still can't believe it. That he's gone. I found out at school. Elijah, my ex, he was the one to comfort me when I first heard the news. He was in my brother's year at school and he found me hiding as I cried. He seemed nice, sweet I guess."
She lets out a dry chuckle and a heavy sigh before continuing. I almost feel guilty for asking her to do this, I know she would tell me eventually anyway, but it's hurting her. So it hurts me.
"For months while I was grieving he was a friend, a should to cry on. I realise now it was a manipulation tactic, that his kindness was never there out of genuine care, only ever control. It was always control. Then he finally asked me out, I was so love struck and flattered by this older boy attracted to me that I immediately said yes. Going out with him was the only thing my mother ever approved of. His family was ridiculously wealthy and high up in the social hierarchy of our town. It was a big deal to some.
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I won't tell you everything that happened with him because frankly it will take too long. When I was 18, I moved in with him. That's when it got really bad, as it turns out he also hated my body and would starve me for days on end. I ended up in the hospital once after I collapsed at a yoga class he made me attend, he just told them it was me starving myself and he would help me."
I clench my teeth in anger, this isn't the rage I'm afraid of, this is anger for Elle. A desire to protect Elle.
"He was so controlling that the yoga class was the only place I was allowed to go unattended, everywhere else he came with me or I wasn't allowed to leave the apartment, I didn't have a phone, I had nothing beyond him. He always used to shout at me, sometimes for nothing, sometimes for everything. The hardest thing was sometimes he was kind, friendly and funny then the next second he was screaming at me and slamming his fist into a wall. It was the unpredictability that scared me..."
Elle looks over her shoulder at me with her little lips trembling. I lean down and kiss her forehead. No wonder she was so frightened when I shouted suddenly, I feel so guilty.
"It was two years ago when it started getting bad."
Worse than before? I feel sick.
"It was bad, he felt like I was holding him back from greatness, he was a big shot lawyer by now and I was his talentless girlfriend who 'sat on her ass all day'. The only thing he wanted from me was pleasure... but when I refused he'd just take it anyway. From that point on he liked to slap me about a bit whenever I did anything to anger him. Once it was a shout and intimidation, but once he got bored of that it was a slap or a kick. For two years I wasn't allowed to leave the house, I only knew him and that fucking house."
My poor darling breaks down into sobs and hides her face in my chest, I spin her around so she's straddling me, her face pressed into neck, whimpering every now and then. I rock her back and forth and quietly mutter into her ear. My hand strokes her back and she lightly sighs.
"It's all ok baby. He won't hurt you again."
I feel her tense and go rigid at the mention of him.
"There's something else." She whispers against me, I hum softly at her and gently ease her slightly away from my so I can look into her eyes.
The tremor in her hands in back and I watch in confusion as she reaches the hand into her bra.
"Woah baby?" I exclaim and desperately avert my eyes.
She huffs in irritation and rolls her eyes at me. "Not like that you idiot." I feel rather stupid.
A note is pressed into my palm and I turn it over. The rage returns almost instinctively as I grip Elle tighter to me protectively.
"What the fuck is this?"
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