"My memory loves you; it asks about you all the time."

[33]

shake my head quickly before opening up the bathroom door and heading to my next class, P.E. There is no doubt that Lily will notice my foul mood and begin to question me on it as I was fine a few minutes ago.

I walk into the change rooms and get changed. I already know I'm late so there is no point in trying to get there any earlier, I'm already in a lot of trouble as it is. What are another ten minutes going to mean?

I slip my P.E t-shirt over my head, the cold material against my skin creating a shiver to run down my already freezing body. I quickly pull my hair into a high ponytail before heading out the change rooms. On the way out, I glance at myself but grimace at the sight.

Ugliness.

I swing the change room's door open and run out the building, quickly walking to my class. I open the gym doors and immediately, everyone's heads snap over to me. Feeling self-conscious, I let my long hair cover my face despite the fact that it's in a ponytail.

"Oi!" Mr Clarrens shouts. I look up at his red, angry face, his eyes a dark shade of brown.

I'm so in trouble.

"Is there a reason why you're late to class, Ms Thompson? Or do you just like joining your classes halfway through each lesson?" He shouts. I stare at him while silently trying to think of a good excuse, except, I don't have one.

"I – I," I stutter. "I was in the bathrooms because...I spilt milk down my shirt?" I mutter stating the excuse more like it is a question.

"Not good enough, Thompson. I expect to see you after school in my office. Is that clear or do I have to say it again?" He demands questionably. He's acting like I'm a fucking five-year-old.

"I understand..." I murmur. Mr Clarrens nods his head before demonstrating how to properly use a hockey stick.

"Hey..." I hear Lily whisper from beside me. I glance sideways at her before completely ignoring her and 'watching' Mr Clarrens attempt at teaching.

"What?" She mutters quietly. I shake my head and take a step sideways away from her. This only prompts Lily to take a step sideways towards me. I – again – take a step away from her.

"Fucking hell, Isabelle. What's gotten into you?" She hisses between her teeth, quite angrily might I add. I sigh and turn to look at her.

"It's nothing, I swear. All I want is to listen to Mr Clarrens teach us how to use a fucking hockey stick. Is that clear or do I have to repeat myself?" I snap, repeating the same words Mr Clarrens said to me earlier.

"Isabelle, all I want to know is -" Lily begins but I cut her off.

"I don't care, Lily," I murmur quietly. Lily huffs and crosses her arms across her chest, popping her hip out. I roll my eyes at her typical sassiness while she eyes me waiting for an explanation.

"I'm fine, Lily," I mumble. Lily rolls her eyes and laughs.

"Sure..." She drones on. I grit my teeth in anger before raising my hand to get Mr Clarrens's attention. Mr Clarrens's head snaps towards mine and he glares at me.

"What now, Thompson?" He snaps furiously, his ears turning a bright red.

"Uh—uh, I think I'm going to vomit..." I say dramatically, holding my hand up to my mouth. Mr Clarrens rolls his eyes at me and shakes his head.

"Nice try, Isabelle...Get back in line," he says bitterly. I begin dry reaching and clutching my stomach, tears pricking my eyes.

"I think – I need to go..." I mumble. Mr Clarrens's face pales and his eyes go wide.

One thing to know about my P.E teacher, he hates vomit, mouth noises, teeth – basically anything that involves the mouth, if you know what I mean...

"Go now! Grab your things and tell the office I've given you permission to go home early," he yells in disgust and keeping his distance as if I'm contagious. I nod my head and run out the gym, but not before glancing in Lily's direction. Her eyes are wide and her mouth is open a jar.

Bye Lily Harley...

Tears burst within me, streams of a warm liquid streaming down my face. My chin wobbles as I realise that my life is - once again – controlled by them. I grab my hair in anger as I let my tears fall freely down my face. It's so raw. My raw emotions, raw tears, raw wounds, everything is so raw.

Maybe these tears will rinse out these memories and take the pain away? Maybe.

I press my head against the wall and feel my heart beat in, out, in, out of my body, again and again. I can't stop this. Nothing – no one will stop them and that's how it is.

I clench my fists continuously, hoping that maybe I could violently let these emotions out...

My bright and happy world is now...not so bright anymore. The black is seeping in with every tear that falls off my cheek and I just can't – will not allow anyone to get close to me again.

No one.

Maybe this is what I need...Perhaps stepping back into the storm will allow my heart to be at peace again? They always find their ways to get back to me; in my dreams, mind, memories, objects, everything.

I slowly raise my head from its loose position on my neck and rapidly blink my eyes, my excess tears falling down my face freely.

One last time.

I take one final breath and stare at the clock on the wall.

One more minute.

I sit on the couch and take a few breaths, finally feeling my shoulders relax at the thought of my escape.

One way out of this.

I hear a thump on the front door. Slowly, I rise from the couch and carefully make my way to the door. The door painfully creaks open before, finally, my escape is revealed.

Adam.

He instantly wraps his arms around my body and pulls me close, his head snuggling into my neck. I embrace his hug and sigh in content.

An escape.

His hands draw circles on my back, and despite the fact that I'm feeling like trash, I still feel those everlasting tingles and butterflies in the pit of my stomach. I bury my head into his chest and inhale his scent.

Safe, I feel safe.

I don't realise I'm still crying until Adam pulls away and uses the pads of his thumbs to wipe the tears off my face. A loud sob escapes my mouth and Adam just smiles sadly at me.

"Prezioso," he begins softly. I look up at him, my eyes puffy and red.

"What?" I croak back. Adam's mouth rests in a straight line, dread filling his eyes as they search over my face.

After a long silence, he finally speaks. "It's Lily...she – she's..."

"What?" I mumble quietly while drawing circles on his arms. Adam sighs and grimaces at whatever thought is in his head.

"Isabelle, Lily is missing..."