❦❦

I wanted Kate's surgery done at the best hospital in the country. So after Dr. Grey signed the release papers, I had Kate airlifted to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles. Her family and I accompanied her in the air ambulance. Cheryl and Nathan decided to drive to LA instead of flying.

Soon after our arrival at the hospital, the doctors prepped Kate for surgery and wheeled her inside the Operating Theatre. Dr. Parker, who was a world-renowned neurologist, informed us that the surgery would take only an hour.

While we waited in a private waiting room, a hospital staff came in and served us gourmet tea and a wide selection of finger sandwiches. I glanced at Kate's mum, Alice, who was sitting across from me. Paige was by her side, wringing her hands nervously.

I cleared my throat. "You both must be hungry." I gestured towards the plates on the low glass table in front of us. "Please eat." Paige gave me a small smile and reached for a sandwich while Alice took a tea cup and moved to sit next to me.

She held the cup to me. Even though I didn't drink tea, I took it from her. I got the feeling she wanted to talk to me and for a moment I was afraid she was going to ask me about what really happened for Kate to be abducted. I still hadn't told her the whole story.

"I have a lot to thank you for." She started. "What you're doing for Kate means a lot."

I suddenly felt uncomfortable. "You don't have to thank me. I'd do anything for her."

"I know you would." She said softly. "She is very lucky to have someone who loves her as much as you do."

I went very still. How did she know that I was in love with Kate?

For the first time that day, Alice smiled. "It's written all over your face."

It was a very rare thing for me to find myself at a loss for words but in that moment, I didn't know what to say. Fortunately, right then, Nathan and Cheryl walked in saving me from having to continue the conversation.

❦❦❦

The next hour dragged by slowly. We didn't make much conversation between us and I was glad for that. The huge plasma screen mounted on the wall was tuned to a news channel and the only sound in the room was the voice of the newscaster.

I was trying so hard to distract myself by watching the news but all I could think about was Kate. The fact that she had been pregnant and lost the baby was too much for me to deal with at the moment. The deep gut-wrenching pain I was feeling inside was unlike anything I'd ever felt before.

Dragging a hand through my hair, I glanced at my Rolex for the hundredth time. There was still forty-five minutes to go until the surgery was done. With a frustrated sigh, I propped my elbows on my knees and pressed the heel of my hand against my eyes. There was a dull ache right behind my eyes that kept intensifying by the minute. I suddenly felt suffocated and wanted to get out of there.

Cheryl, who was sitting beside me, shot me a concerned look when I suddenly stood up. "Just need some air." I explained.

"Want me to go with you?" Nathan asked, already rising from his seat.

I shook my head. "I won't be long." Stepping out in the hallway, I headed to a set of double doors with an exit sign hanging above. The door opened into an expansive garden with pebbled pathways and wooden benches scattered here and there. The setting sun casted a soft golden glow across the surrounding trees and shrubbery.

I drew in a deep breath, feeling the crisp air in my lungs. It helped to clear my head and melt away some of the tension in me. Pulling out my phone, I checked my messages. Most of them were work related including a few emails from my Chief Operating Officer, Lisa Moretti. During my absence from office, she handled all business matters and I knew she wouldn't bother me unless it was really important. But for the first time in my life, I didn't feel like attending any business matters.

I sat down on a bench, needing a few moments for myself before I headed back inside. Running on high emotions since the previous night, I felt exhausted, mentally and physically.

❦❦❦

"The surgery went well." Dr. Parker announced as he walked into the waiting room. "We are keeping Ms. Lewis in a medically induced coma to relieve the pressure on her brain and help her recover."

"She is going to pull through this, right?" Alice sounded shaken as if she was afraid.

Dr. Parker smiled reassuringly. "Yes, ma'am. Your daughter is going to make a full physical recovery. It will take time though. As you know, she has several broken ribs, which will take at least six weeks to heal."

Pushing my hands deep into my pockets, I took a deep breath. "How long are you going to keep her under?"

"We'll start bringing her out of the coma after a week." He answered my question. "She's being moved to the ICU now where we'll keep her overnight. Once she is set up there, you can go see her."

A few minutes later, a nurse came and led us to the ICU. Paige and Alice went in first while I stayed outside in the waiting area with Nathan and Cheryl. When it was my turn to go in and see her, I felt so anxious. I thought I was prepared, but when I saw her lying in the bed all my control threatened to slip away. She looked so small and frail in the light blue hospital gown. Her swollen face was too pale. Deathly pale.

She had a tube down her throat and was hooked up to a ventilator. A couple of monitors above her head showed her heartbeat and other vitals. Dr. Parker had drilled a hole in her skull and inserted a tube to drain the excess fluid in her brain and prevent swelling. Two IVs were attached to her left arm and her right wrist was in a cast. The beeping from the monitors echoed in the quiet room.

My heart lurched painfully in my chest seeing her like that. I wanted to take her pain away, take her place but there was nothing I could do. I felt helpless and completely useless. I had the money and power but I hadn't been able to protect the only woman I ever loved. Hadn't been able to protect our baby. The crushing sense of failure the thought brought made me sick.

Sitting on the chair beside her bed, I gently took her left hand in mine, careful not to move her arm. She felt so cold to the touch. "I'm so sorry, baby. It's all my fault. I let you down." I whispered raggedly as I pressed my mouth to her hand. "I should have protected you better."

I had never felt so emotionally tortured as I did at that moment. I sat with her for a while and kissed her lightly on the forehead before leaving.

When I walked out, I was surprised to see my parents in the waiting area. Ben was standing beside them and I figured he had driven them straight from the airport. I had completely forgotten about their arrival time.

While they went inside to see Kate, I turned to Alice. "I've arranged a suite for you at my hotel. If you would like to freshen up and rest for a while, Ben will take you there."

She looked uncertain so I added. "You can come back later and stay overnight." Although the hospital had strict rules about not allowing overnight visitors in the ICU, the management was quick to bend the rules for me.

My parents came out of the ICU a few minutes later. Mom looked shaken and there were tears in her eyes as she struggled to pull herself together. Even dad looked pale and he was a man who was always in control.

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart." Mom hugged me and then held me at arm's length, her worried eyes searching my face. "Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine." Eventually. I forced a smile on my face, which I hoped masked the grief I was feeling. The last thing I wanted was her to worry about me.

Leaving mom and Cheryl inside, I stepped outside with Dad. He wanted to know the details about Kate's abduction and I told him everything.

When I finished, he was silent for a moment. "We'll make sure those bastards get the maximum sentence for what they did."

"They are not in police custody, dad. I told you I didn't want to involve police in this."

He frowned. "Then where are they?"

I didn't want to hide anything from him. "Nik's taking care of them."

Dad wasn't stupid. He knew what I meant without me having to clarify it. "I didn't know Nik had a part time job taking the trash out."

A smile touched my face at his choice of words. "Someone needs to clean out the city."

He looked thoughtful. "So the rumors are true then?"

I knew he was referring to the rumors about Nik's connection to the Lazarro Crime family that dominated organized crime in the West Coast. I chose not to answer. If I confirmed it, then I would be betraying Nik and if I denied it, then I would be lying to dad.

He understood my silence, respecting it by not pressing me. "I trust your judgement, son." He said softly. "But Kate's family is going to ask questions. They would want to know why the man who abducted her had not been arrested and sent to jail."

That had occurred to me and I already had thought of what to say. "I'll handle it."

"Good." He nodded, then laid a hand on my arm. "You should go home and get some rest."

"I'm fine."

"You're not. You've been through a lot."

"Dad, I need to be with Kate."

"I understand, son, but what you need right now is a good meal and a few hours of rest. Your mother and I will stay at the hospital until you come."

I sighed knowing he was right. The exhaustion was finally catching up on me.

Nathan drove me home and Cheryl accompanied us.

"Want a drink?" Nathan asked as we stepped out of the elevator and walked into the foyer of my penthouse.

"Scotch, neat." I called over my shoulder and took the stairs to my bedroom. Discarding my clothes, I walked into the Jacuzzi shower stall in my bathroom and turned on the knob for water. Jets of warm water sprayed my body from all sides, the hot water soaking my sore and tired muscles. I felt the tension in my body melt away.

I had spent the whole day guarding my emotions, but now that I was alone, I let my guard down. I thought of the baby I had lost. The baby I didn't even know existed until it was too late. I wondered if it would have been a girl or a boy. I knew I should stop torturing myself with the thoughts but couldn't help envisioning a small child, a child I would have cherished and protected from all harms of the world. The grief that slammed into me was so painful I wondered if I would ever be able to survive it.

❦❦❦

The next morning, Kate was moved from the ICU to a private suite. I wanted her to have the best suite in the hospital and they arranged a Super Deluxe two-bedroom suite, which overlooked Hollywood Hills. It had its own dining area, and came with a personal gourmet chef and personal attendants.

The next week passed in a blur. I spent all my time between work and hospital. At the beginning of the second week, Dr. Parker felt Kate was ready to be brought out of the coma so he started gradually reducing the amount of anesthetic drugs he was giving her.

Thirty-six hours later, she was finally awake.

"How's she?" I asked when Dr. Parker came out of Kate's room.

"She is awake but drowsy. Patients normally feel out of it when they come out of a coma." He explained, "I need to check her vitals and run a few tests on her first. When I'm done, you can go in and see her."

When he went back inside, I sat down on one of the leather chairs in the sitting area. Cheryl had taken Alice and Paige out to dinner. They hadn't wanted to go but I had persuaded them. They had been in the hospital for too long and needed some time to clear their heads.

Pulling out my phone, I called Cheryl and told her Kate was awake. Hal, who had spent the last few days camped at the hospital, had also gone home to shower and change. So, it was just me in the hospital at that moment.

I couldn't wait to see Kate and I wondered how she would react to seeing me. But then a sudden torturous thought occurred to me. What if she didn't want me here? I was the reason she was in this state and I couldn't really blame her if she didn't want to see me.