《A Bully's Regret》Chapter 14
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The back room, or green room as it was nicknamed, was a small space where guest speakers, musical performers and sound crew hung out behind the scenes. She knocked on the wooden door and waited for a response. When she couldn't hear any movement, she knocked again.
"Harrison? You in there? It's me. Grace." she added lamely.
A second passed before she heard his heavy footsteps coming towards her. The door opened and Harrison's handsome yet uncertain face appeared before her. His hair was disheveled like he had been running his hands through them. His eyes appeared red rimmed. He looked devastated and her traitorous heart melted.
"If you're here to yell at me, can we do it later? I'm not in the mood."
Her eyes softened and without a word she stepped around him and into the small room. She breathed in the musky scent. She hadn't been in this room often, but she had a sense of sentimentality as she glanced around.
She turned to face him. He had closed the door and was leaning against it, arms crossed and head down.
"I spoke with Amelia."
His head jerked up and he groaned.
"She's the worst person to talk to."
Her face scrunched up. "Why?"
"Because she was so excited when I came to her with this plan. She called me every night that we met up to discuss this disaster of a reunion. Wanting to know what I said to you, what you said, what our chemistry was like. Jesus, you should've heard her when she caught us hooking up at O'Ryan's. She asked Liam if it was too late to do a double wedding."
Her jaw dropped before laughing. That was so Amelia.
"I just know she's going to over romanticize my feelings and make me seem like a character from a Nicholas Sparks novel."
She took a few steps towards him, her heart pounding. "Would she be lying if she did?"
Harrison glanced at her, his breathing seeming to pause as he took in her words.
"No," he breathed. "No, she wouldn't be lying. I fucking do feel like a character in a Nicholas Sparks novel."
Her heart soared, a jolt of pleasure coursing through her. Wow.
"Harrison," she licked her suddenly dry lips. "I know you've been wanting to talk about what happened all those years ago. With our blossoming friendship and prom..." she looked down, twisting her fingers in nervousness. She thought that what had happened all those years ago no longer mattered. That they had started fresh. But the truth is, she still felt hurt, bitter and betrayed by what occurred. Thinking about it was too painful, let alone speaking.
"It was Jessica." he simply said.
She nodded, head still bowed.
"I knew it. Something she said made me realise why you suddenly cut contact. She refused to admit it when I confronted her today. I told her not to show her face tonight or I'd kick her out."
She couldn't even bring herself to feel bad.
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"The day after you insinuated that you would ask me to prom-"
"I wasn't insinuating, Gracie," he took a step closer to her until he was right in front of her. Close enough to touch. "I was planning on asking you. I should've fucking grown some balls and asked you outright. But I was so worried that you didn't feel the same way that I thought I'd put the feelers out first, in case you weren't interested."
She shook her head. "It wouldn't have mattered anyway. The next day Jessica cornered me in the bathroom and told me that it was all a prank."
"And you believed her?"
She gave him a chastising look. "Not at first. Given our history I had surprisingly a lot of faith in you. But then she mentioned that you were going to ask me to prom, she told me that you had tested the waters with me the night before to see if I would say yes. I'm paraphrasing, it was so long ago but she knew what we had discussed the evening before. She said the plan was that you were going to ask me and then show up with her on the day and film me or something. Basically she said that I was going to be the senior year prank."
Harrison's eyes widened in horror. "What?" he spat out.
He turned away and ran his fingers through his hair in anger. "That fucking bitch. I told the crew to lay off you, that you were cool and if I heard a whisper of negativity towards you I would cut them off. That's the one and only time I ever talked about you to them. After we became friends." he added.
She believed him. She didn't know why, but she just had a feeling that he was being truthful.
"I believe you. The only thing that stumped me was how Jessica knew what we were talking about."
"She must've heard us that night, too. She overheard James and I chatting today in the back about you and confronted us. When we have football practice, the cheerleaders have theirs, too. They were out on the field with us that night." he shook his head in disbelief. "She came up to me afterwards, wanted to go out for God knows what. But I wasn't interested. My mind was focused on you and I brushed her off. She must've followed me and overheard us chatting."
The more she thought about it, the more plausible that sounded. Jessica did seem to have a habit of lurking and eavesdropping, given her behavior today. She one hundred percent did not think she was a prank.
"So.." she started, "that means, you did have genuine feelings for me?"
Harrison came towards her, reaching out to brush a strand of hair away from her face.
"Did and do," he confirmed.
"But you went to prom with Jessica?" she couldn't help but ask.
He sighed. "I was devastated when you cut contact with me. But I understood it. It was a pipe dream to think that you would suddenly forgive me for all the shit that I put you through. I didn't ask Jessica to prom but we were all going as a group so I let her think we were going together, given that she didn't have a date."
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"She was holding out for you to ask."
"Yeah, probably. I didn't give a shit to be honest. I left early, didn't even wait around for the prom king and queen announcement. After losing your friendship, the possibilities that could have been, I just lost interest."
He took a deep breath before continuing. "The closer we got to graduation, the more anxious I felt. I was losing you and I couldn't take it. Pretty soon you would be packing up your car and driving out of Langley. Out of my life."
"Harrison," she whispered. She reached out and grabbed his hand which he instinctively squeezed.
"I was driving past your house and saw you loading up your car. This was two days after graduation. I parked up like a creeper and watched you kissing Teddy goodbye before you, your parents and Amelia drove off."
"Melia and I had a road trip planned," she murmured. "Then I was going to fly out to California, start my part time job, save some money while I lived with a cousin out there before moving into the dorms once classes started. I couldn't get out of Langley fast enough."
He let out a humourless laugh. "I figured. I'm ashamed to admit that I spiralled after that. I wasn't prepared for you leaving that soon. I thought I would convince you to be friends with me again, we'd keep in touch while you were away, maybe do a long distance thing if you were still into me. That's how far I got with my plan. But seeing you drive out of my life was like a shot in the heart. I gave up. Focused on farmwork, got back together casually with Jessica. I drank a lot, got into fights. Remember when I told you that I had a wake up call?"
"Yeah.."
"It was seeing you at the supermarket when you came back for that wedding."
Her mouth dropped open. "What are you talking about?"
"When I saw you again, it was like a bucket of cold water. All my feelings that I had for you, they came rushing back, but stronger. After you left for college, I convinced myself that what I felt was just remorse for being an asshole to you, that I only felt friendship for you. I tried to tell myself that there's no way I could have fallen in love at eighteen and not with someone that I treated appallingly."
Her mind focused on one sentence - fallen in love? Love? Harrison loved her? Oh, my God.
"But just one look at you in the grocers and I knew that I had been kidding myself. When I asked you whether you were happy and you smugly told me yes, I knew that i needed to get on your level before you even considered including me in your life again. So I sat dad and Ryan down and had that heart to heart with them. I enrolled in college and you know the rest. What you don't know is that I did that all for you. I did it because of you."
"Harrison," tears streamed down her face.
What he was saying, it was so beautiful. It was everything she ever wanted to hear and didn't know she did. This beautiful man had changed his life, not just because of her but for her. Without her asking and without him knowing whether he would be a part of her life in the future.
"I don't know what to say," she sniffed.
Without thinking she lunged into his arms and buried her head in his chest. He wrapped his big arms around her, resting his cheek against her soft hair. He placed a kiss on top of her head and pulled back, framing her face with his hands.
"This whole reunion was for you. It was a way to make up for not asking you to prom, to make up for all the shit I put you through and a way to worm my way back into your life. Amelia, Liam, James and Ruth were in on it. I told them not to show up for the last few meetings."
"Cheeky," she laughed. "Ameila told me that you had some convincing to do with her," she glanced down shyly. "That you stopped, erm, hooking up with women for a while."
Harrison gave her a tender smile. "I didn't do that to prove anything to Amelia. I was sick of meaningless flings and one night stands, especially after I saw you again. I just had no interest in going out and getting shit faced and waking up with some nameless female. But I didn't realise that Amelia was watching me like a hawk and that my change in behaviour was what got her on my side."
Acting on impulse, Grace reached up, clutching Harrison's face in her hands and planted her lips against his. He paused in surprise before sinking into her kiss with a groan. He reached around and circled her small waist with his hands, pulling her body flush against his. She felt his desire for her grow against her and she wantonly rubbed up to him.
"Grace," he groaned, pulling away.
Frustrated she tried to follow his step, desperate to feel his mouth on hers again, his tongue sliding against her own.
"Wait, Gracie,"
"Why?" she pouted. "I believe you, I forgive you. Penis, please." she reached down to unbutton his pants when he stopped her again.
"Gracie.. I just need to say one thing."
'What?" she asked impatiently. She needed to feel him against her, inside her. The feelings he expressed to her overwhelmed her. Thrilled her. Pleasured her. She wanted to reciprocate how she was feeling to him. And she needed to do it now.
"I love you."
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