《Submission》Chapter 51
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Jesse texted Lorelei while she was over at Jody and Mateo's. It was a simple message.
Jody and Mateo were eating pancakes. Lorelei's remained untouched, despite Jody putting a sickening amount of syrup and whipped cream on top.
"Jesse wants me to go to his place," Lorelei said.
"I wouldn't go right now," Jody said. "He's in the mood to fight. He won't be speaking rationally."
"What do you think he'll do?"
Jody shrugged.
"He'll yell and be defensive," she said. "That's the only way he knows how to protect himself."
"If you were a man, he'd throw a punch," Mateo said. "He tried to hit me once."
"How come you two are even friends?" Lorelei asked.
"Similar interests," he said. "I have known him for a long time."
"It's a weird dynamic," Lorelei said.
Jody and Mateo exchanged a silent glance to each other. Lorelei wondered what they were saying, but did not want to ask. She did not know how much she should believe Jody's story about being faithful.
Lorelei's stomach was twisted in a knot. She needed to speak to Jesse. She could imagine him pacing in his apartment and brewing on the thought that she was cheating on him with Mateo. She hated picturing him like that.
Lorelei slid off of the stool.
"I need to talk to him," she said.
"I'm telling you that it is a mistake," Jody said. "Give him a few days to cool off."
A few days? Lorelei thought.
There was no way that she could go a few days without contacting Jesse. She was sure that if he thought that she was ignoring him, that would only add to his anger.
"I'm going to risk it," Lorelei said.
"Good luck," Jody said. "Let me know how it goes."
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Lorelei nodded before grabbing her purse. She threw it over her shoulder as she left the apartment. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and sent Jesse a text.
Her heart was pounding as she walked to Jesse's building. Her knees shook as she climbed the stairs and she struggled to breathe. She did not want to get in an argument with Jesse, but she had to prepare herself. She felt like she was going to have a heart attack when she knocked on Jesse's door.
Jesse opened the door seconds after she knocked, and she wondered if he was waiting by the door for her to arrive. His hair was a mess, like he had been running his fingers through it all morning. He curled his fingers into the doorframe as he struggled not to wrap his arms around Lorelei.
"Come in," he said.
He pushed the door open wider and Lorelei stepped in. She walked over to the couch and sat down. She was on the edge of the cushion and prepared herself to run. The warning that Jesse was looking for a fight sat heavy in her mind.
Jesse let out a deep breath as he sat next to Lorelei. He leaned forward so that his elbows were resting on his knees. He turned his head to look at her. She could see that his eyes were glassy with the tears he was holding back.
"I need you to tell me the truth," Jesse said.
"Jesse, I have never lied to you," Lorelei said.
Jesse scoffed and rolled his eyes. He ran his fingers through his hair. Lorelei curled her fingers into the cushion of the couch.
"I know you're cheating," he said.
"I'm not going to have this conversation if you are not going to listen to me," she said.
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"Wow, you didn't even deny it."
Lorelei sighed as she stood. She turned to face Jesse and crossed her arms over her chest. She gritted her teeth as she tried to keep calm.
"Why would I cheat on you?" Lorelei asked.
"Because you want somebody else," he said.
"If I really wanted someone else I could have gone to Bryan," she said.
Jesse raised a brow.
"Were you fucking him too?" he asked.
Lorelei threw up her hands in frustration.
"That's not what I am trying to say!" she said. "I don't want to cheat on you, Jesse. I don't cheat. I know what that feels like, and the fact that you would accuse me of that is pretty low."
Jesse dropped his head. It was silent for a moment. Lorelei could only hear her heart pounding in her ears. He looked up and was chewing on his bottom lip.
"Why did you take that photo?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Because Jody told me you enjoyed photos," she said. "I thought it was a way I could apologize for you going to jail."
"Then how come you never sent it to me?" he asked.
"I was waiting for the perfect time. I was still a little mad at you for the wedding incident."
Jesse nodded. He cleared his throat, and Lorelei assumed it was an attempt to stop him from crying.
"You never had sex with Mateo?" he asked.
"Of course not," she said.
"You would never leave me, right?"
Lorelei's heart sank in her chest. Jesse wiped the stray tear off of his cheek. His words hung heavy in the air. She had never seen him look so vulnerable
She sat down next to him on the couch. She cupped his face in her hands and lifted his head to look at her. His eyes were casted down.
"Jesse, look at me," Lorelei said. He sniffled to try and stop his crying. "Jesse, I need you to look at me."
Jesse slowly brought his eyes to meet Lorelei's. She gave him a soft smile. She hated seeing him cry. When she saw his profile online, she never predicted that they would be here. She never assumed he would be on the couch crying at the thought that she would leave her.
"I love you," she said.
They had not said those words since leaving the bathroom at Molly's wedding. The words felt natural falling off Lorelei's lips. She did love him, despite all of this drama. She was more in love with him than she had ever been with anyone.
Jesse took in a sharp breath. He pulled Lorelei's hands off of his face before wiping the tears away. Relief washed over Lorelei when she watched him smile.
"I love you, Lorelei," he said.
She wrapped her arms around Jesse's neck. Jesse put his hand on her hip and pulled her onto his lap. He pressed his lips against hers and she could taste his salty tears. Lorelei clung to his shirt as he tenderly kissed her.
"I'm sorry," he said. He brushed a piece of her hair out of her face. "I guess I overreacted."
"You believe me that I never cheated on you?" she asked.
Jesse nodded. Lorelei rested her head against his chest. They sat in silence and Lorelei listened to Jesse's heartbeat through his chest.
"So when are you going to send me that photo?" he asked.
Lorelei laughed as she shook her head.
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