Brownies

Coming back from the game with the guys, I took off my jacket as soon as I walked into the apartment and hanged it. Olivia had cuddled herself comfortably into a ball on the couch and I titled her head from behind so that I could give her a kiss.

“Hey baby”

“Hi babe”, she smiled a little with her eyes still glued on the television screen. “How was the game?”

“The leopards lost, but it was still a good game”

“Did you guys enjoy yourselves?”, she asked as I slid under the blanket she wrapped herself with to lay on top of her so that she could do that thing I liked, whereby she would scratch the back of my head during cuddles

“Yeah we did, but it wasn't the same as being here with you though”, I looked up at her grinning and she kissed the top of my head, her hand started doing its magic, and I felt like I was literally dissolving into dust as she continued massaging the back of my head, adding a gentle stroke on the cheek here and there, and I hummed in satisfaction

She was watching this murder documentary while waiting for her favorite late night reality show. For me, it's the way she was watching it, not even flinching at all.

“The bodies were found with multiple stab wounds, around the back, chest and abdomen. Resulting in a total of 76 stab wounds”

She was even halfway through the chips she was saving for her show, concentrating so hard, I actually looked up to stare at her

“Oh my God, Liv”, I shook her a little so that she could blink or something. She was so zoned out, lured into the sound of the TV so hard I could swear she wasn't even breathing. I couldn't even last a minute without looking away when the gruesome scenes came up.

“What?”, she turned to look at me, popping a chip into her mouth and chowed softly

“Blink, breath...do something”

“I am”, she laughed, turning to look at the screen again and that freezing stare came into motion again. How could she even watch this kind of things without even shuddering? People like her could possibly learn how to get away with murder.

“Should I be worried?”, I asked, and she turned to look at her again

“No”, she shrugged. “I just happen to like this kind of shows, they're thrilling you know?”

Thrilling?

“The killer proceeded to cut the bodies up, displacing the body parts into trash bags and distributed the remains in the woods”

“The woods? That guy was legit trying to get caught. Basic move”, she shook her head, popping another chip in her mouth. “I sometimes genuinely wonder if these people strategize their killings or not. How do you get rid of a body somewhere there are likely chances that they may be discovered? Why not just burn them and get rid of the evidence once and for all?......because I know I would”

I blinked repeatedly as I forced myself to sit up, quickly stretching my hand to grab the remote to switch the channel. Her face dropped as she put out both her hands in protest.

“Why did you do that?”

“You're already strategizing the murder, that's never a good sign”, I said, and I think that's when she actually thought about it, slowly withdrawing her incoming protest

“Yeah, I guess you're right”, she laughed. “But I really need to start watching that show more now to be honest”

“Are you serious?”

“It's not like I'm not not kidding”

I heaved a sigh while facepalming and she laughed, nudging with her elbow

“Okay I'm kidding”, she popped another chip into her mouth. “Want to watch a movie instead?”

“I have a better idea”

“What?”

I took a weed packet out of my pocket and showed it to her, grinning ear to ear and a smile appeared on her face

“What? No”, she exclaimed, and I wiggled his eyebrows at her.

“Let's get lit baby”

“No we can't smoke that”, she sat up on the couch, looking uncertain all of a sudden

“Why not?”

“There are like smoke detectors in here and stuff. Where did you even get this?”

“Kevin gave it to me at the game”

“Should have known”, she shook her head. “You know what, I have a better idea”

She pulled me up on my feet to the kitchen, taking out the baking essentials out of the cabinets

“I like the way you think”, I pulled my weight up to sit on the counter. “-even though it's going to fuck up even more now that we're going to ingest it”

“Are you scared?”, she challenged and I smirked

“Absolutely not”, I flexed my muscles. “I fear nothing”

“Alright tough guy, let's bake some brownies”

After baking the brownies, we both ate two at the begining, but then they ended up being so good, we took some more, almost leaving none and that's how our night actually started...from there on it was just crazy and hectic

After some time, we laid exhausted on the couch, both breathing heavily from the dance off session we had in the lounge. I had switched on a music channel on the TV, and I was taken aback a little when he started dancing out of nowhere. I knew both of us totally looking like goofballs but because we were having so much fun, it really didn't matter. We were laughing and simply enjoying ourselves.

The weed was slowly starting to kick in and then there was that relaxed state

“Hey”, I crawled to sit on top of him. “I have a new face mask I bought the other day so... I was wondering if you would like to join me?”, I grinned at him, and he immediately shook his head.

“No”

“Oh, come on”, I taunted. “Don't you want to get clearer skin?”

“My skin is as clear as it can get”, he pointed out, and he was actually right, his face was a lot clearer than mine, but I wasn't willing to go down without a fight

Ten minutes later, we were looking at our reflections on the bathroom mirror with the mattifying white clay masks on our faces. It wasn't that hard to convince him when though he was plainly trying to stand his ground.

“Can't believe you talked me into this”, he scoffed as he stared at his reflection on the mirror, almost like he didn't believe it was him he was seeing

“It doesn't look so bad”

“Why does it feel like it's eating my face though? Is this normal?”, he was in the panicking zone and I laughed.

“It means it's working”

“What if it peels my skin off or something?”, he turned to look at me and I saw his eyes were getting little and redding in color. He was definitely high with these random silly thoughts.

“It won't, relax”

“I look ridiculous”, he complained, taking his phone out to look at his reflection on the screen

“You do know we're literally standing in front of a mirror, right?”

“Mirrors are deceiving. I trust my phone to be brutally honest with me”, he said, and I laughed at how accurate that sounded. “You know how you can look at yourself in the mirror and think damn, don't I look good today? And take out your phone to take bomb selfies and all the pictures come out like, you really shouldn't have been that confident, and you end up deleting all of them because they turned out ugly as fuck?”

I laughed so hard I was holding onto the basin for balance.” That's really sad, but relatable”

When I looked back up, I noticed he was holding the camera up at me, with a smile on his face

“Are you recording this?”, I asked, already shielding my face from him, and he kept peeling them off every time

“I want to remember this”, he followed my face with the camera as I tried hiding from him, unable to help myself from smiling

“Why?”

“This is when I realized that you actually had me wrapped around your little finger for me to agree to put this on my face”, he turned the camera to him, running his hand through his hair

“Nathan if you're watching this, I'm telling you right now that you're a goner man. This girl right here, will be the death of you one day, but it's all worth it because you're so in love with her”

“Also Liv if you're watching this, this is a daily reminder that this is the one you're not letting get away because he's the best you've ever had”, I chipped in, standing close to him so that we both in the video and I saw his face soften a little as he looked at me

“I'm the best you've ever had?”, he really looked touched as he placed his hand over his chest

“You're the best thing to ever happen to me”, I stood on my tippy-toes to plant my lips against his, and he smiled genuinely as I pulled away to look at the screen again, wrapping his arm around me. His face dropped a little and I imagined it must have been from the heat from the mask because I felt the same.

“Please get this thing off my face”, he cried, fanning his face with his hands and I turned on some water in the basin so that we can rinse it off

We spent the rest of the night lying in bed talking about nothing while vibing to some slowed songs on my playlist, making the drowsy feeling hit even harder

“Have you realized you appreciate music more when you're high?”, I asked aloud, and I felt him nod his head. He was laying on my chest while I played with his hair.

“Can I let you in on a random thought?”, he looked up at me

“Yeah sure, what it is?”

“Come closer”, he motioned with his hand and I leaned closer to his face. “I want our baby to have your eyes”

“Wait, what?”, I giggled uncontrollably, not being able to help myself

“Like when we have a baby, I mean when we do decide to have a baby, whenever you down because I am, we can even make one right now if you're up for it; I'm just saying”, he rambled so fast, I think he lost me right there at the beginning

“I want him or her to have your eyes”

“I get that but why my eyes and not yours?”

“Your eyes are way prettier than mine”, he paused for a second. “No wait, actually I want our baby to look like you”

“Have you looked at yourself in the mirror? It's actually kind of rude that you get to walk around like this”

He chuckled. “Like what?”

“Looking this goddamn fine like geez, we get it that God has his favorites...no need to brag”

He laughed

“I'm also happen to be partially blind in case you forgot, so I can't really see what you mean,” he shrugged his shoulders and I laughed

“So that's why I want our baby to have your eyes”

“That's a really valid point there”, we returned to our original position and I could feel that he was going to drift to sleep soon

“Liv?”, I looked at him and his eyes were a lot sleepier than usual, but then they still had that glow whenever he looks at me all the time, sending me from the moon and back. I feel like I'm floating off the face of the earth because I did feel special.

“Hmm?”, I quirked my eyebrows, and he reached up and touched my face, his hands trailing down softly on my cheek

“Have I ever told you that I love you?”, he asked, and I wiggled my eyebrows in agreement. He never missed out on an opportunity to showing me how much he appreciates me, and I'm certain he could tell when I suddenly go speechless every time he told me he loves me, not knowing what to say next, and he'd always say,

“It's okay, you don't have to say it back if you're not ready to, okay?”

Even though we've been dating for four months now, I actually haven't told him I love him. Why you may ask?

It's because everyone I tell people I loved them, that managed to jinx every relationship I've been in the past. After coming to terms with being in a loving, committed relationship, something just happens out of the blue; whether the guy loses interest or gets afraid of being tied down by the release of the ILY word........can't say I know why exactly.

“You have. So does that mean you still do even now?”, I asked as we locked eyes again, and he smiled lazily at me.

“I really do love you, now more than ever”, he was still trailing his fingers in my face. and I leaned to kiss him on his forehead, both his cheeks and finally his lips and he closed his eyes, slowly drifting off to sleep as he was starting to mumble out words and I couldn't tell what he was saying exactly

“Goodnight babe”, I whispered as I covered us both with the blanket and cuddled next to him

“Goodnight Bella”

The next morning, I woke up to Nathan giving me kisses all over my face, a smile already appearing on my lips even though I was still half asleep, but then I couldn't help it. Him showing me affection every morning when he wakes up was already a great way to start my day, and he's actually the first person I've dated who preferred physical touch as his form of love language......and I loved it.

“Good morning baby”, he smiled when I finally peeled my eyes open

“Good morning”, I pulled the covers closer to my face, closing my eyes to take a mini nap again, and I felt him brush his hands in my hair before pressing his lips against my temple, seconds later I felt the bed undip besides me

I rolled on my stomach to see him on the floor doing sit-ups. He normally woke up around 5am to go to the gym but when he couldn't, he just worked out at home before his morning shower and I couldn't help but stare at him as he did his thing. He would occasionally catch me staring at him and smiled instead. Every time I looked at him, I get filled with this sense of happiness and warmth in my heart.

If someone told me that a few months ago that, one of these days you're going to meet a guy who treats you the way you're supposed to be treated, I probably wouldn't have believed them at all because it seemed too good to be true and almost unreal.....until Nathan came along. I've realized that I've grown attached to him so much, I don't know what I would have been without him. He's shown me so much love and kindness during these four months of our relationship than anyone has ever had in my life. I realized that nothing was never wrong with me to begin with, I just never found someone who finds utmost joy in accepting me for all my flaws and imperfections as a person.

When he switched to push-ups, I got off the bed and slipped underneath him, locking my legs around his torso and a smile crept to his lips as he continued his workout, careful not to press his full weight on top of me each time he lowered his body. I lightly ran my hand up his arms to wave my fingers through his hair and pulled him in for a kiss.

“You can't seem to get enough of me, can you?”, he whispered, and I breathed out a laugh

“Can you blame me?”

“No”, he kissed my forehead as he continued with his workout, his eyes never leaving mine

“Can I tell you something?”

“Yeah what?”

“It may have taken me a long time to say this to you but, I want you to know that, I love you”

He paused for a second, blinking in surprise before he lifted me up as he turned over to sit up straight and had me straddling him

“What did you say?”

“I said what I said”, I laughed, dropping my eyes a little from his gaze and he laughed a little whilst grabbing my face in his hand to tilt my head up so that I looked at him

“Please say it again”

“I said I love you Nathan McCarthy”, he looked almost relieved to hear me finally say that to him. “and I adore you unconditionally for who you are as a person”

“I love you too Olivia Davis, so so much”

“I know”, I wrapped my arms around his neck. “I really hope you don't change on me one day though Nate, it's taken me a while for me to finally get to this point only for you to leave”

“I'm not planning to. You mean so much to me Bella, I'm not willing to let you go”

“Me neither”, I kissed him fully on the lips before embracing him in a hug, and he started rocking us side to side, running his hand gently on my back

“Are you hungry?”, he asked as we broke our contact, raising his eyebrow at me daring me to say I am because I had a habit of not eating breakfast in the morning

“I guess I could eat”, I shrugged my shoulders, but honestly I was starving from all those brownies we consumed last night

“Let me go whip something for us real quick”, he was about to stand on his feet, but then it's like he thought about something and stopped, locking me into his arms again and my hands travelled up his arms

“What's wrong?”

“Nothing's wrong, it's just that-”, he bought his face closer to mine. “I would really like for you to meet my family”