The talk

I was waiting on Nathan to arrive because tonight was the big night. The we need to talk night, and I was still practicing what I was going to say on my bathroom mirror. I was anything I could possibly want to be whenever I was in that space but for now, I just had to work on my confidence while sober because I promised myself I wouldn't drink until we get over this, as much as I needed a confidence booster, this is one conversation I had to be sober minded for.

The self-talk mirror session wasn't working as well as I'd hoped, so indulging in a pre-dinner snack was currently the way to go. While I was still eating cheese crackers dipped in peanut butter, I heard a knock on the door and I quickly fixed my appearance on the microwave mirror finish, making sure I looked presentable enough to distract him a little before walking to the door to open.

The second I pulled it open, I saw him learning on the door frame with his hands in his pockets, dressed in grey sweatpants and a light navy blue T-shirt with his eyes already prepared to bore into mine the moment I stood opposite him and I take what I said back, I definitely needed a drink, because some drunken adult decisions were about to be made tonight

"Hi Nathan", the smile on his face brightened as his eyes travelled up and down my body in awe, so were mine because wow, he looked incredibly yummy right now, I just wanted to rip those clothes off him and have my way with him that very second

-but I couldn't cause I had zero drunk confidence in me at this moment but anyhooow....

"Hey Liv", he walked inside, and I closed the door behind him while being intoxicated by the smell of his expensive cologne, losing my state of mind a little

"Can I get you something to drink?", I offered and watched as he put out both his hands. Thinking he wanted a hug, I took a step closer to him, and he swiftly pulled me in by my pockets and my body collided into his.

"Maybe later", he whispered while taking me by the hand and twirled me around in a circle

"Aren't you adorable today?", he smiled while creating a noticeable distance between us with our hands still interlocked, with his eyes still travelling up and down my body like he's never seen a girl dressed in a short denim dungaree with a white tank top and sneakers, wearing my hair in two ponytail buns

"You look really cute"

"Thanks. You don't look too bad yourself", I laughed softly, leading him to the couch.

"Where were you going, looking so fine?", he asked when I put my legs up over his lap and his hands started trailing smoothly on my thighs

"I just came back from the grocery store actually, I was running low on some groceries and snacks"

"But the real snack is right here sitting next to you, what more to you need?", he teased, and I laughed to noticed he was still looking at me with a smile on his face. Then suddenly, I felt this sharp, stabbing pain on my lower belly and fidgeted in discomfort while pressing one of the cushions onto my lower abdomen to ease the poking pain.

"Are you okay?", he immediately sat up, worry and concern raining from his face

"Yeah I'm fine, it's just stomach cramps"

"Should I get you like, a hot water bottle or something?", he was about to stand up, but I grabbed him by his arm, stopping him

"No, thanks, it comes and goes. I'll be okay, don't worry", I smiled, and he reached his hand out to touch my face. I paused for a second while he was stroking my cheek and his eyes were soft as he looked like he was admiring me or something. I couldn't help but to leaned to his touch and kiss the palm of his hand.

Only the lord knows how much I missed this, to see and touch her again. Each time felt like a dream I just didn't want to wake up from. Seeing her laugh and smile also bought a smile to my face, it was hard not to because she was just so beautiful and seeing her happy, also made me happy.

I watched as she suddenly shifted her face from my hold and I realized that she probably was still not over what happened the other day at my apartment

"Are you mad at me, Liv?", I asked, drawing closer to her and her eyes never left mine

"Why would I be mad at you? Did you do something to make me mad?", she rose a brow and that's probably a trick question because we both knew the answer to that.

"I think so, that night when we had that argument about me seeing other people then you texted, 'we need to talk'?"

"You think I'm mad about that?", she questioned, and I nodded my head. It was the only logical explanation to why she was giving me the cold shoulder each time I tried to reach out to her.

"I'm not mad about you seeing other people, Nathan. I'm just disappointed that I had to hear it from Kevin rather than from you. I deserved to know, don't you think?"

"Well you shouldn't be because I'm not seeing other people"

"What do you mean?", she put her hand on her chin, striking a thinking pose. "Kevin said you had a hot date, and you said that the date was okay and that maybe you might see her again"

She looked so adorable right now, I couldn't help but smile that she was actually jealous

"That hot date was you", I watched her eyes lurk around in confusion before she tilted her head to the side

"What do you mean?"

"Do you remember that night when we were supposed to go to the movies but couldn't because you had fallen sick?"

"Yeah, I remember"

"I couldn't tell the guys that I'm hanging out with you that night, so I told them I'm going out with a smoking hot girl and that girl happened to be you"

She looked like she felt so bad in that moment, realizing that I cancelled plans with the guys so that I could spend more time with her

"So you're telling me I got worked up for nothing?", she questioned while raising a brow at me and me nodded

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I liked that you were jealous over me, I found it really cute", I grinned, and she looked like she suddenly felt the urge to hit me with something

"You prick!", she grabbed the cushion she was pressing on her stomach and started to hit me with it, probably to knock whatever that had gotten into me when I thought doing her like that was cute

"I can't believe you made me go through all of that", she continued hitting me with it until I grabbed the cushion and threw it behind the couch while pinning both her hands together with one hand

"I'm sorry, okay? I didn't think it would be a huge deal and that you'll be so sensitive about it", I laughed, and she scoffed mockingly while sitting back in her original position.

"I'm not sensitive", she folded her arms angrily across her chest, faking being pissed to hide the smile that was threatening to show on her face. I reach for her face to pinched of her cheek, tilting her head side to side.

"Softie, softie", I taunted, and she slapped my hand away, narrowing her eyes threateningly at me before chewing on a peanut butter dipped cracker

"Do you want to die?", she put her weird combination on the coffee table and folded her arms again. "Is that want you want?"

"What I want, is for you to sit on my face so that I can eat you out, Bella", I bit my lip invitingly, and she suddenly went speechless with her cheeks turning to a dark shade of red.

"Okay, I wasn't expecting that", she giggled, and I could see she was a little nervous as she drew a breath

"Are you hungry?", she stuttered while scratching her next and I knew she was changing the topic, anything to get away from me to gather back her confidence so that she can gather enough courage for comebacks

"I don't think it's food I'm hungry for", my eyes dropped to the meal I had in mind on her body and she made that nervous chuckle while standing on her feet

"Well I am, and I'll be right back", she walked in the direction of the kitchen but stopped mid-track when she saw me also standing on my feet

"No, don't follow me", she held up both hands, warning me to stop because she probably knew I was going to be a distraction in there. Not that I blamed her though, I didn't trust myself around her either.

"I'm just going to the bathroom", I lied, turning my feet to the opposite direction to make my statement more believable

"O-kay?", she didn't sound convinced. "But when you come back, you stay in here. Do you understand?"

"Yes my lady", I nodded at her, and she slipped into the kitchen. I laughed to myself as I walked to the bathroom to just wash my hands. When in there, I accidentally knocked over the bathroom bin with my foot when I turned to leave and the contents spilled right out, onto the floor.

"Opps", I knelt to put all the content back into the bin again but one box completely stood out as it scattered further than the rest. My brain froze for a second and I could feel all the blood drain on my face from the realization that it was a pregnancy test box and every inch of me paused while I took a second for my thoughts to catch up.

I shook the box to hear that it had something inside and curiosity took the best of me that I ended up taking the stick out, only to stare eye-wide at a positive pregnancy test

I was completely thunderstruck while connecting the dots in my head, then everything made sense now; the mood swings, weird cravings, stomach cramps

She's pregnant

The walk to the kitchen seemed to have been the longest I've ever made in my life; as if coming to her apartment after our argument wasn't scary enough, now I had to stumble upon this discovery

"Liv?", I called out to her while she was still making food for herself with her back facing me. She groaned when hearing the sound of my voice.

"I thought we agreed that you're not going to come in here-", she was interrupted by me placing the test besides her on the counter while standing behind her

"Care to explain to me the meaning of this?"

"You were not supposed to see that because I should have got rid of it", she turned to look at me and my eyebrow rose in disbelief at her

"Get rid of it?", I prompted, and she folded her arms across her chest.

"It's not what it looks like", that was the best defense she could come up with and I genuinely couldn't believe how calm she was about all of this

"It's not what it looks like", I repeated her words, scoffing in disbelief while pocketing my hands. "Were you even planning to tell me about this, Olivia?"

"Tell you what?", she motioned with her hand, and I was about to say something, actually snap at her, but I held my cool. I drew a breath while covering my mouth with my fist to calm myself down. It's bad enough I had to find out for myself what was going on, and now she was actually going to play dumb about it.

"That you're pregnant, Liv", I said quietly, and she breathed out a laugh

"Does it matter?"

Huh?

"What the fuck you mean does it matter? Of course, it fucking matters", my voice raised a little because I was getting a little pissed here, and she wasn't making things easier for me by acting the way she way.

"It doesn't matter any more dude because it's all taken care of now", she said calmly while turning her back against me and continuing with what she was doing

"All taken care of-", I paused for a few seconds, remembering what happened yesterday when I called her and overheard her talking to someone about a procedure

Was the procedure in question here doing an....?

No, she couldn't have...

Could she? Without telling me?

"Olivia?", I turned her around so that she faced me, and she rose her eyebrows

"What?"

"Please tell me you didn't do it"