Rose

I stare at the door, becoming angry.

When the fuck is he going to let me out this bitch?

I throw my pillow across the room.

This is why I ran away, I knew he would do this again.

The first time I was in this room, I understood it. He had kidnapped me and I was something he wanted but I didn't want him.

But now, I thought we were closer than this. I told him I wouldn't leave. I told him, but he doesn't trust me.

Just like my dad.

He would keep me in my room, locked up just like this until I was ready to train.

I would scream and shout that I was ready but he would always hear the tears in my voice and tell me I wasn't.

I was five.

By ten, I had just got used to the guns, knives, blood. Everything.

I didn't cry anymore. No, I was angry.

So when my mom told us we were leaving, I left, and I made sure he couldn't find us.

Now here I am again, letting myself be treated like this.

Is it worth it?

Is one-

My thoughts are cut off as Ryder slowly opens the door, his eyes meeting mine the moment he walks in.

"What do you want?" I sigh, turning my gaze elsewhere.

I can't even look at him. Shit.

But why not?

"The kiss, I've been avoiding it for a couple days but I couldn't take it anymore. You let me kiss you, you even kissed me back. Why?" He closes the door, leaning against it in his usual position.

I look at him, debating what I should say.

"I remembered you were a good kisser and thought I would have a little fun." I plaster a smirk on my face leaning back on my hands, into my bed.

It's a lie but it's all I can think of.

Honestly, I don't know what I was thinking.

He looks at me and sighs.

"This is something you would do."

I look at him from the corner of my eye.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

He pushes off the door and walks toward me.

"For you to lie in self-defense, it's something you would do."

I sit up, taking my hands off my bed and into my lap.

"If that's what seems like, then whatever." I was trained how to lie. How to stay calm when confronted. He's guessing I'm lying. He doesn't know.

"You didn't even look at me when you said that, you're lying." He puts his hands on either side of me, leaning in, bringing his face close to mine.

"I can say it again if you want, I wanted some fun so I had it. Simple." I look him in his eyes as his breath fans my cheeks.

"Then let's have some fun right now."

He brings his hand around my waist, dropping down on me, pinning my arms down to the bed.

Not this time. I don't want to play.

I twist my body, bringing my legs up to hit the side of his ribcage as hard as they can.

He groans, letting go of me backing away from the bed.

"So the kiss didn't mean anything?" He coughs out.

"No."

"Bullshit! I know you Rose and if you didn't like it I'd probably be dead right now." He holds his chest where I hit him.

"I already told you it was for fun!" I stand up, getting angry.

"You have the nerve to lock me in this room for days, again, and come in here demanding answers, and even when I give you one, you ask for another one, just cause you don't like it. What do you want from me?!" I ask, pushing him against the wall behind him.

His hand comes up to stroke my cheek. I stand in front of him containing myself because if I react I don't know what I'd do.

"You. I want all of you. I've wanted you from the moment I met you. Rose the shy nerd, was actually Rose, fearless, independent, violent Rose, and she's who I want. The real you." He holds my jaw now, staring intensely into my eyes.

The real me...

"What if I say I don't want you?" I don't how I feel, everything seems so bittersweet. Mostly bitter.

"You do."

"What if I say you haven't seen half of what's really me?" Cause he hasn't.

"I don't care. I know you."

"What if I say I'm dangerous and you're going to get yourself killed staying with me?" I am dangerous.

"I don't know what life is without you in it, not anymore."

"What if I say fuck you?"

"When?" He smirks.

I turn around, shaking my head while walking back to my bed.

Sitting down, I see Ryder right behind me.

He's really just my lost puppy. Dumbass puppy but one I can kinda forgive.

"Come here, on your knees, in between my legs." He kneels in front of me and smiles.

"You want me to eat you out? Finally, I've been wan--"

I smack the back of his head.

"No, stupid. Shut up." Real fucking dumb.

He chuckles.

I let a slight smile appear on my lips.

I hold his neck with one hand and use the other to run through his hair.

His eyes light up at the feel of this.

"I'm willing to be Queen if you listen to everything I say, and let me out this damn room."

His eyes light up immediately but then he frowns.

"You can't ask to leave me, but other than that yes, anything you want." He lays his chin on my stomach, looking up to me.

"Good."

"You're mine and I know you liked that kiss I could feel it."

You're mine.

I feel the same warmth from before run through me and for the first time I don't hate how that sounds too much.

"And you're cute I guess." I respond, ignoring the second part, looking back down at him, leaning closer and closer until our lips meet for a second.

A quick peck.

It doesn't feel that bad...

______________________________________

Hit 10k 10/22/18

11/7/18

16.5k

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