"I swear, if this membrane sweep doesn't work, I'm going to cry." Sounding thoroughly cheesed off, Hetty huffs loudly, plonking both of her arms down either side of herself on her sofa. "I mean, I've been drinking raspberry leaf tea and everything...but this baby, it just don't want to come out."

H is beyond fed up. Beyond uncomfortable. Beyond rational.

She's gone a week over her due date, so the positive and upbeat Hetty that we all know and love has most certainly gone AWOL.

"Come on, H, you know this is all going to be worth it in the end." I don't think that at all, but I'm just trying to be a supportive and encouraging friend to my jaded girl. For the past hour, I have had to endure being told all about the midwife separating the membranes of the amniotic sac away from my friends stubborn cervix, in the hope that it will kick-start Hetty's labour. God, could pregnancy be anymore undignified? Never in my lifetime will I ever be okay about having some person 'sweeping' my cervix. Nope! Not ever gonna happen! I'll be dead before I'm ever okay with a cervical caress. I can only just about handle having a smear test done.

Huffing again, only louder this time, Hetty grumbles. "It better be, hun. I've not seen my feet in weeks and I haven't been able to trim my pubes...it's like a bloody bramble bush down there."

That's it, I'm bent forwards with laughter. "Get Will to trim them?"

Hetty is looking at me with such seriousness, despite me laughing at her. "He tried! Nearly took out my left labia!"

Now, I'm actually rolling around in my chair, consumed by a fit of hysterics. "H, too much bloody information!" Even when she's fed up and frustrated, Hetty always cheers me up. I have needed this laughter. Needed this silly and daft kind of fun. God, I really have. Hetty and Will's baby isn't the only thing that's overdue; so is Mitch's location shoot in Idaho. The filming schedule has ran over by a week, which is causing a lot of tension for everyone involved. It's costly and inconvenient. Mitch is now falling behind on other commitments, which is frustrating the hell out of him, because he was hoping to fit in a few days to come and see me before he had to fulfil them. Last night, he despondently had to break the news to me that he'll no longer be able to do that now. I can't tell you which one of us was more upset by that news. Part of me wants to just get on a plane, and just go to where Mitch is, but I can't. I have my own work commitments to fulfil and Hetty could go into labour at almost any moment. So, my head is here, while my heart is very much elsewhere at the moment. On the upside, I have been tweaking my diary, trying to free up some days, just so I can eventually see Mitch. I suppose this is the trying part of us deciding to be together. We have talked about our work and the distance, how it will impact our relationship...and now, we are most definitely experiencing that impact. "You're going to make me pee myself, H...stop it!"

"Don't get me started on peeing, either. I was having such strong Braxton Hicks the other night, I thought my waters had broken. They were pretty intense, and I ended up just piddling on the kitchen floor." My friends eyes are wide, wide with the anxiety that her own bladder has caused her.

"God! No more! I can't bear it!" I can't properly breathe from my laughter. All I'm doing is collapsing in my seat, incapacitated by my hysterics.

"Well I'm glad someone is enjoying the glamour of my pregnancy." Hetty smirks, trying to give me a disgusted sidelong glance. "If you don't stop laughing, I'll have you trimming my bramble bush in a minute."

It's at this point, that Will strolls into the living room, after just nipping out to the shop to get some bread, milk and some more raspberry leaf tea. "That's the first small smile I have seen on her face for days, Rebecca, I'm glad you're here." He affectionately then plants a kiss on Hetty's forehead. "You've had enough now, haven't you, babe?"

Gently, Hetty begins stroking her huge pregnancy bump. "Yup!" She says, loudly sighing from out of both of her nostrils. "But luckily for you, babes, the midwife said that sex is another good thing to get labour started...so how about you and I get my oxytocin going later on?" She lewdly waggles her brows at her smiling husband.

With an adorable coyness, Will shakes his amused head. "I suppose I had better take all the sex that's on offer from you, because once the baby is here, he or she will be a living and breathing form of contraception."

With that, I feel it's my time to go. "Right then, you horny parents-to-be, I will leave you both to it." Pushing myself up from out of my seat, I then go and hug Hetty. "Call me if anything happens, okay?"

"I will." H says, smiling up at me, looking prettily so heavily pregnant. "Thanks for coming, B."

As I'm hugging Will, I happily say. "My pleasure."

Bringing my bag strap up onto my shoulder, I quickly blow a kiss to Hetty. "See you soon."

As I am just about to leave the room, Hetty calls out after me. "Say hi to Mitch from your hippo-sized friend, won't you?"

Chuckling, I smile at Will and answer Hetty while I'm still walking. "Okaaaaaay!"

I know I shouldn't wish away time, but that's exactly what I am now doing. I can't wait to see Mitch again. I can't.

I want his kisses.

His cuddles.

His smiles.

His everything....

.....and maybe even a little oxytocin production of our own?