I walk towards Amy stop in front of her.

"Amy, You lead it today. You set the phase in which you want to go. I will catch up", I tell her.

In all our past attempts, I lead the show. I pushed her, waited for her reaction and pushed her a little more. But I want to try something different today. I have been doing research of my own. I want her to tell me what she wants so I can work her through it.

Amy drops her tote bag and moves closer. When she is less than a foot away, she catches holds of my lapel and goes up on her toes to press her lips to mine. I open my mouth and move in sync with her lips. She takes my lower lip between her lips and sucks on it. My hand moves up to tilt her head to get a better angle. Soon our tongues are exploring and Amy moves closer pressing her body to me. My hand goes around her waist and glue her to my body removing any space between us.

Amy goes rigid immediately. Tell-signs of anxiety. I pull away from her lips and start peppering kisses on her jaws, neck and shoulder, giving her time to catch her breath. But I don't move away.

A part of me wonders if I am doing the right thing. Should I wait until all the issues between us are resolved before we move forward? Should I at least wait for the therapy session to get over? But, the sessions were not for us to reconcile. The whole point was for us to do this. Help Amy get over her fear of touch. So, if Amy says she is ready. Should I not believe her? Give her what she is asking me.

Before I talk myself out of this, Amy soft moan snaps me out of my thoughts. I drop a kiss before sucking her sweet spot where her neck meets the shoulders.

"Eth", she moans again and all the blood rushes to my c*ck and I am instantly hard. I slide my hand under her shirt and feel her soft warm skin. She shudders at contact. I slowly slide it up and flick her pebbled nipples through her cotton bra.

"Oh God", she moans and her head tilts back as she arcs pushing her breast in my hands. I press my lips to her swallowing her moans as I drag the tip of my fingers along the hem of her bra until I reach behind to unhook it. Once free, I slide my hand inside her bra and thumb her nipples. She gasps inside my mouth and I can feel her getting tensed.

This the farthest we have ever come. And I don't want to stop. I promised her I will push her so I do just that. I continue flicking her nipple and seduce her. Soon she relaxes, giving into the need I am building in her. I break the kiss and in a quick move remove her top and bra. Before she can think and analyse, my mouth latches on to her nipple. She almost falls back losing her footing before I circle arms around her waist and hold her.

"God Eth..", she moans much louder. I continue sucking and nibbling her red nipples loving that its soft and hard at the same time. I switch to the other nipple all the while as Amy moans and whines gripping my hair to hold onto me. My c*ck is uncomfortable hard against the zipper of my pants.

I realize that I need to keep Amy enticed if I want to see this through. If I let her think she will go to the dark place that sets the panic attack. So I bring my lips back to her lips kissing her deeply while I lose my clothes. Amy is eager to help and in no time I am down to my boxers.

I lift her and she wraps her legs around my waist. My hard length presses her s*x and her head tilts back breaking the kiss as she shudders. I thrust eliciting throaty moans as I carry her to the couch. Her wetness seeps to my boxer through her cotton panties making me lose my mind. I dump her on the couch unceremoniously and drop to my knees. In the few seconds that took me to get on the floor, Amy's eyes are clouded with distress.

I don't wait for a second more before I latch on to her nipples again. Even though I continue to give my full attention to her pebbled nipples, I try to read if she is unease and wait for her to push me away. We have made huge progress today. Though I would stop if I sense any sign of tension, I want to push her all the way. She is ready. I can feel it. Even if we don't do it today. Amy will get there very soon.

As I continue to lap her nipples sucking and nibbling like a thirsty man who found water in a desert, I feel Amy's finger clutch my hair. I smile against her breast knowingly she has forgotten her fears and is turned on. I slowly slide my hand down her stomach and into her panties. She shivers and grunts as I find her nub and circle my finger. I slide my finger further down coating it with her wetness. My thumb works on her nub and I run my finger up and down her clits. She is already shaking as I continue to rub slow circles.

"Oh God Ethan..", she sobs as I slide one long finger inside her p*ssy. By the way, her p*ssy tightens around my finger, I know she is close. I add another finger and move it in and out in slow rhythm. As I remove my finger to shift her panties away from her s*x to get better access, Amy protests asking me not to stop.

I let go of her nipple with a painless bit which brings out another loud moan and start peppering kisses along her inner thighs. I work my way up and reach her wet clits. One long lick from her s*x to n*b has Amy withering and begging.

"Please. Oh God.. Please. Ethan"

I put my fingers and tongue at work, pushing in and out as I lick, suck and nib on the lips of her p*ssy. Amy is trembling, moaning and enjoying what I was doing to her, working her to an org*sm. When she finally c*ms, she is shaking and quivering, arching her back and biting her lower lip drawing blood.

As soon as she falls back on the couch exhausted, I lose my boxers and remove her panties. In one swift move, I sit on the couch and lift Amy on my lap, her legs wide open and her s*x pressed to my c*ck. Before she can catch her breath, I rub my hard head against her clits turning her on again in no time. I tilt her head and kiss her as I coat my c*ck with the juice that's pouring out of Amy's p*ssy.

Once Amy starts to moan into my mouth, I slide my length slowly one inch at a time. F*uck she is tight and I thank my stamina for not c*mming already.

Amy's nails bore into my shoulders where she is holding on to me as I thrust the full length. Once I am completely inside her I give her a few seconds to get adjusted. I push her hair back and cup her cheek with one hand and guide her to move back and forth with the other.

Hair loose, lips swollen, eyes hooded and chest heaving, Amy looks absolutely gorgeous. At that moment, it hit me hard, how much I missed her. missed this. us. These conversations we had when we stared into each other's eyes, wordlessly saying 'I love you's' and displaying the raw vulnerability when we came undone. I missed these moments. Meaningless one-night stands could never bring this feeling of contentment I feel looking into Amy's eyes and guiding her through intense pleasure.

During s*x, we let go of control and expose our primitive and honest emotions. We allow the partner to see us in the most basic rudimentary state. As I stare into Amy's eyes, I finally see it. The hurt, the pain and the love. It's staring back at me begging me to understand. The message clear. Amy still loves me. And seeing it in her dilated eyes knocks the wind out of me.

I stop guiding her and still for a second before crashing my lips to hers, kissing her deeply and letting her know, I am getting it now. I hope she understands mine too as I work my hips in and out thrusting like a man on a mission.

Soon Amy moans and shudders above me. She is close. I can feel the walls of her p*ssy strangling me. I go harder and deeper which makes Amy break away from my lips and arc back resting her palms on my thighs behind her and pushing her tits forward. Amy looks erotic and it makes me harder stretching her p*ssy even more as she moans and begs. With one arm circled around her and other working on her nub, I drive in and out of her making her c*m while her whole body convulses to an intense neverending orgasm.

Once she finishes, she falls on my chest boneless quivering. I give her time to recover and for her body to stop trembling before I lift her to pull out my painfully hard length so I can rush to the nearest restroom to take care of it before I die of blue balls. As soon as I pull an inch off, Amy pulls me right back and scrambles to lift her head from my chest and ask me breathlessly

"What are you doing?"

She supports herself by resting one hand on the couch next to my head and staring at me confused.

"I need to care of this", I say with a soft thrust which makes her moan and tighten her p*ssy.

"Give me a minute sweetheart ", I groan.

"Let me", she says and circles her hips slowly driving me crazy.

"You don't have to Am. My hands can do a fine job", I say clenching my jaws and trying to stop her from moving her hips. I am so close to losing control and hammering into her. I tell myself this is not about me. It is about her.

Amy brings her palm that was resting on my chest and covering my mouth shutting me from saying me anything further.

"Shut up.., I am so... tired of this...", Amy says panting. " tired of your regret. You're guilty. Tired of you treating me like a glued back porcelain doll. I want this. I want to make you feel good... It's not only for you. It's for me as well... I need to know I can satisfy you... I need to prove it to myself that I am not broken any more... So let me do this...". I nod letting her know I understand.

"This is the last time I want to hear about your regrets... I don't want it or your guilty... I want you... Just Ethan... Cocky and self-assured... Driving me crazy... Ethan", Amy says and starts kissing me deeply and rolling her hips like she is possessed.

I want you... I want you rings in my ears like a shove in the direction I was too afraid to go. Amy wants me. God. This is an admission that broke every barrier that I constructed in my heart telling myself that she needs someone better. But not anymore. If she wants me, she gets me. Even if that means, I have to fight myself, to get over my guilt. Or fight Amy, to get over her fears. I am going to fight for her. Fight for me because I can not let anyone take this away from me. I won't let anyone or anything get between Amy and me. She was it for me before but I did a stupid mistake and lost her. Now that I have her back, I will fight tooth and nail to have her back and make her stay. She is mine. And I am hers.

Amy is riding me, rolling her hips and pressing her lips on my chest, jaws and shoulders, dropping wet kissing making me hard once again. I finally snap and lift her and place her on the couch and get on top of her without pulling out. The movement pushes me further inside her making Amy arc off the couch. I circle my arms around her waist and lift her hips getting to an angle that I know drives her crazy.

Before I can overthink and analyze if Amy was ready or not, I ram into her pushing to the brim and pulling out, going at it relentless. Its a matter of seconds before Amy arcs pulling me in and we both c*m together cursing and groaning.

Only when I feel the wetness on my thigh, I realize that I have forgotten condoms.

" Shit!! I forgot the condoms. I will get you the morning after pills", I say still heaving

"It's okay. I am on pills", Amy says gulping air.

I shift to lie next to Amy pulling her back to my front cuddling.

"I love you. Amy. I have been an idiot but now I am going to fight for you. Fight for me. I don't want a life without you. So get ready Amy. I am going to make you fall in love with me once again and this time we are going the entire way. Kids.. Grandkids.. Picket fenced house and until death do us apart"

Amy doesn't say anything but I know she heard it. I felt her heartbeat frantically. I kiss her shoulders and pull her closer removing any space between us before falling in the most relaxed sleep I had in years. Amy silence means she didn't protest my declaration and I can live with that.