Dane

I've been trying to search for Mackenzie since I lost her in the kitchen, but people kept fucking stopping me to try and talk to me. I hadn't liked the look on her face when she took her first shot. It was a combination of determination and recklessness. I knew that expression. It led to some of my worst hangovers of my life. She was emotional and she was ready to just let herself go completely.

I finally find Mackenzie, and I don't like what I see. She is clearly drunk as hell. Someone had turned what was supposed to be our dining room into a dance floor. Makenzie is on the edge, dancing by herself a drink in her hand.

Grant approaches her, and puts his hand on her waist. He leans down and says something in her ear. She makes a face, and tries to step back. But he grabs her and pulls her to him.

It takes my brain a second to register what is happening, and then I'm striding over.

"Get your hands off her." I grab Grant and pull him off her.

"Hey, she wants me here." Grant tells me.

"No." Mackenzie slurs. She steps back and Grant grabs her again, his hand reaching around her for her ass.

"Grant!"

"We're dancing, Dane. Get the fuck out of here."

"Dane--" Mackenzie looks at me, and I can see how uncomfortable she looks. Everything that I've said to her in the past week and a half comes crashing down on me, and with the combination of Noah's words earlier, I feel like the most awful human being alive.

"Back off, Grant." I reach for Mackenzie, and even though I know she's mad at me, she takes my hand, and when her warm fingers fold around mine, I know that I don't deserve her. I pull her away from Grant, who whirls on me.

"What the fuck is your problem, dude? Can't a guy dance?"

"Sure. But not with her." I tell him.

"Fuck off, bro. I'll dance with who I want to."

"No."

"If you weren't fucking maimed right now, I'd fucking punch you."

"You're the one who maimed me, asshole!" I let go of Mackenzie's hand, ready to hit Grant.

"Hey, hey!" Noah appears out of fucking thin air and puts a hand on my chest. "Dane, walk away."

"I'm gonna fucking beat him." I mutter.

"Just, go." Noah pushes me gently. "Mackenzie needs you." I turn to find Mackenzie stumbling through the living room, weaving her way through a bunch of drunk baseball players.

I know that I'm the reason that she's drunk herself to this state.

"Mack!" I call after her, pushing my way through the people. I finally catch her at the bottom of the stairs.

"What?" When she whirls around, her angry tone catches me off guard. "What the fuck do you want, Dane?"

"Mackenzie--"

"No. Don't fucking Mackenzie me." She basically pulls herself up the stairs using the railing. I'm not sure where she thinks she's going.

"I just--" I follow her. "I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Only because Grant tried to fucking dance with me. Otherwise I might as well be nothing to you." Her voice is so bitter.

"That's not true."

"Uh-huh." She makes it to my room where she stumbles inside and then into the bathroom. She slams her hand against the wall and then fumbles around until she finds the light switch. "I'm gonna puke and then I'm going to give you a piece of my mind."

It's a struggle to not laugh as I close the door behind us. I lock it for good measure, even though it occurs to me that it might freak out drunk Mackenzie that she's locked in a room with me, the person she's clearly furious at.

I listen to Mackenzie throw up several times and flush the toilet. I can hear her drinking from the faucet. She comes out and sits down on my futon. She's clearly still drunk.

"You--" She points at me. "You said we're not friends. And then you're mad that Grant tries to dance with me? You've been mad every time I try to fucking help you since this shit happened." She points at my sling. "I'm sorry this happened to you, but I don't know why you're so mad at me, Dane. I just wanted to help you. I just wanted to be there for you. Because I thought you needed someone."

She takes a deep breath and I know that she's not done.

"I don't get what I did wrong. I thought--" She lets out a small noise. "It doesn't matter what I thought. Because this is all over." Her face crumples and then she's sobbing into her hands.

I feel like the worst person who has ever lived. "Mackenzie. This isn't over." I sit down next to her and wrap my good arm around her shoulders. It feels so good to have her close to me. "I'm so sorry." I press my face into her hair. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I repeat it as she cries into my chest.

"Dane, I can't do this anymore. I can't do this if you're going to keep being mean to me."

"I'll be better, Mackenzie. I swear."

"I don't think I'm going to remember this conversation." Mackenzie lets out a weak laugh. I don't know how a person can be so god damn self aware. "Will you promise me again tomorrow?"

"Of course." God she's fucking cute. I want to kiss her, even knowing that she just threw up. I know it's a terrible idea because she's had at least nine drinks that I've seen and she's only been at our house for like two and a half hours.

"How mad will you be if I fall asleep on this futon?" She mumbles, her words starting to slur even further.

"Not at all, I just want you safe." I tell her, but I'm pretty sure she's already falling asleep.

I manage to ease myself out from under her, and I can hear her start to lightly snore as she lays there. I take my blanket from my bed and put it over her. I'm scared to fall asleep in case she needs me, so I take an Advil, and lay in bed and stare at the ceiling.

I must fall asleep at some point because I wake up to the sound of the toilet flushing and Mackenzie muttering. "Fuck!" I hear her trip on something and then the sound of her drinking out of the faucet again.

I hear her walk across the room and try the door. "Mackenzie?" I ask.

"Sorry, I was just gonna walk home." She tells me. I look at my phone, it's 4:30AM.

"Like hell you are." I reply.

"I don't want to bother you anymore." She sounds sad again.

"You're not bothering me." I say, realizing that this is a massive pivot from my actions for the past week and a half. I'm going to give this girl whiplash.

"It's okay. You--"

I cut her off. "Mack, you shouldn't be walking home right now."

"I'm just uncomfortable on the futon. I'll be fine, Dane."

"I want you to be safe." I say, taking a deep beath, knowing that what I'm going to say next is either the bravest or stupidest thing I've done. "You can sleep in my bed."

"With you?" I can hear her gulp. God, I like her. I like her too much. But I don't care. I'll do anything for her.

"Yes, I was planning to stay in here." I say trying not to laugh.

"I don't want to hurt you." Not the objection I was expecting.

"Just go on my right side. I'll be fine."

"Okay." I was expecting more of a fight. It's a long moment before she crawls into bed with me. When she slides in next to me, I understand why. She's taken off her pants. It takes a lot of my self-control to not run my hand up her leg when her leg comes over mine. "Can I cuddle you?"

I'm pretty sure all boundaries we've had of 'tutor' or 'friendship' have been thrown at the window. And I could literally give 0 fucks. "Yeah." I whisper. "Of course."

She presses herself against me and lays her head on my good shoulder. I wrap my arm around her, and gently rub my thumb in circles on her upper arm. She lets out a small happy noise, and moves her leg so it's fully pressed against mine.

"You're really warm." She murmurs into my shirt.

"Thanks."

"Dane?"

"Yes."

"Will you forgive me for whatever I did to make you mad?"

"I was mad at myself." I whisper to her. "Not at you."

"It's funny how that can bite you in the ass." She murmurs.

"I'm sorry I let it bite you too." I tell her, desperately wishing that she was fully sober because this is the easiest way to say these words, in the dark without judgment. I know that the morning won't be nearly this friendly.

Her leg clenches slightly tighter around me and she lets out another small noise.

"I like you."

I can hear that her breathing evens out almost as soon as she says these words, but my mind is spinning. Does she mean that she likes me in a more than friends way? This feels like more than friends cuddling. This feels like Mackenzie is all up in my business and I fucking love it.

I let myself relax into the feeling of just having Mackenzie against me, and I drift off to sleep, trying not to think about the chaos that the morning will bring.