Maddie is already parked in my driveway when I get home. She's sitting on the hood of her car in a hoodie and sweatpants, a textbook sprawled out in front of her.

I never thought Maddie's studying would ever turn me on, but here we are.

"Hey." I smile, flinging my duffel bag from practice over my shoulder. I'm still in my training leggings and cleats, no shirt on, and as soon as Maddie sees me her eyes turn that dark blue again.

She strums her pencil along her bottom lip, biting the edge of the eraser once she gets to the end, and i almost give in. I almost kiss her, but I don't.

"Studying?" I ask when she still hasn't said anything. "How long have you been here for?"

"You told me to meet you at 7." She huffs, glancing down at her watch. "It's 7:30."

Prompt and on time. Never missing a beat. It used to irritate the shit out of me, but now it's just... sexy. A girl that's driving me crazy and has brains? It's incredible.

And dangerous.

"I'm sorry. Practice went a bit over. Did you want to come inside?"

I'm standing over her as she sits on the hood of the car, and she peers up at me through those eyelashes again, that damn look of innocence written on her face.

"I don't think that's the best idea." She admits, and I wonder if I get to her the same way she gets to me.

"Okay, well, look..." I sigh, running a hand through my hair. "Mads, what we did was..." I trail off, because I still haven't been able to find the words for it.

She waves her hand for me to continue.

"It was great, okay? I mean, I really enjoyed it, but if Ethan finds out..."

"He'll kill us both." She finishes for me. "I get it. I kind of knew this was coming, so it's not a big shocker really."

She's not pissed?

I think back to how many times I've been cussed at by countless women, but she just shoves her textbook back into her backpack as if everything is fine.

"So..." I trail off, trying to figure out what it is I'm feeling right now.

Am I disappointed?

Am I sad?

I don't think I was ending things. Yeah, if Ethan found out he would kill us, but I would have found a way probably. Knowing she's fine with never hooking up again irritates me.

Maybe it didn't mean as much to her as I thought it did.

"So it's all good." She nods. "Honestly, it's fine. I'm not going to act like the rest and get pissed. I knew what I was getting myself into."

I almost laugh, but I don't. She thinks she's like the rest? I mean, I get why she would think that, but doesn't she realize that I care about her?

Why would she when you treated her like shit the past three years?

Pushing the thought out of my head, I grab onto her hand and feel the smoothness of her palm.

"You weren't like them." I tell her. "You're more than them, Mads, but I can't give you what you want. You deserve someone that can show you off and tell the entire world about you, not someone who would have to keep you a secret."

She grips tightly onto my hand, almost like she doesn't want to let go.

"I haven't been the same since my mom passed, and there's a lot of things wrong with me that I still have to figure out. You'll get hurt if we continue to do this, and that's why I'm cutting things off. Not because you were someone for me to just use, okay?"

"Okay." She sniffles but quickly recollects herself and hops off the hood. "Can I just ask you something though?"

With her cheeks stained with tears, my stomach flips. It's a sight I never want to see again. I'm certain I'd do whatever the hell I can to make her smile.

"Anything." I say.

"Was I any good at it?" She asks, and again, I hold back a laugh before she continues. "The kissing, I mean. Did you like it?"

Oh, how naive and inexperienced she is.

I must have a smug grin on my face because she smacks me on my chest, pointing a finger to my face.

"I'm being serious!" She pouts, then laughs immediately after.

There's that smile.

"You were incredible." I admit. "I'm not just saying that."

I'm trying not to think about it, but I can't. The way she made me feel during that kiss. Like I was high when I hadn't even smoked.

The way she moaned my name, practically panting from how badly she wanted me. She was so wet. She made my hand soaking wet.

"Wow." She arches a brow up and smiles proudly. "I'm impressed with myself."

"You should be."

She goes to head around to the drivers side of her car, but I don't want her to leave. I know ending things is the right thing to do, but it doesn't feel like it right now.

"Mads." I whisper, grabbing onto her elbow.

She turns to face me now, and her back is pressed up against the drivers door. Maddie is so beautiful, and I don't know why I never noticed it before. I mean, I knew she was pretty, but not like this.

I put both of my hands on top of the car so that I've boxed her in, and immediately her hands grab onto my cheeks. I close my eyes at her touch, savoring every minute.

What are we doing?

"What are we doing?" She repeats my thoughts, and the breath hitches in my throat.

"I don't know." I reply honestly. "I just know that..." I shake my head, shocked by what was about to come out of my mouth.

"That what?" She whispers.

My pride is telling me not to say it, because the minute that I do I know I'll never be able to take it back.

But why the hell should I let her walk away? She wants this, right? She wants me. I just told her she could get hurt, and she's still here, still wanting me.

"That I... want this." I finish, scanning her eyes for any sort of reaction. "I don't want this to stop."

There's a lot more feelings going on inside of me than just that, but I've never felt this way before, and it's terrifying to me. I can't bring myself to tell her anything more than that.

"I don't either," She replies. "But what does that mean? Where do we go from here?"

I lean in and gently press my lips against hers, unable to take it anymore. The feeling of being high, being completely intoxicated by just her lips tears through me, and my hands run into her hair, clamping down to let her know that I need her right now.

I've needed her for days.

I've needed her for years I think.

And that terrifies the living shit out of me.

"Can we talk about it after?" I breathlessly pull away and scan her eyes again, loving the look she's giving me. "I know we've got shit to figure out, but right now I just..."

She kisses me again and nods against my lips, her hands running down my bare chest just like they did in the closet.

I thought maybe it felt different because we couldn't see each other at the time since it was so dark, but now that I can see her, I realize it just made those feelings grow that much more intense.

My dad is still on his business trip - unsurprisingly - so I pull her with me into the house, my lips never once leaving hers.

I kick the door shut behind us with one foot as she drops her backpack to the floor, and I swear her tongue is driving me wild. I kiss her intensely, deeply, until she pulls away, panting and out of breath.

I get to see this look on her face in broad daylight finally, her cheeks flushed, her eyes wild, and her curls going every which way from my hands running through it.

This is the part where we should probably stop. We should talk about what we're doing, but her sweatshirt has rode up from kissing me, and it's showing her skin. Her perfect, soft, silky skin.

"Oh my god, come here." I mutter and pull her to me once more.

I kick my cleats off and continue pushing her back towards the couch. She doesn't fight me when I tug the sweatshirt off of her and fling it to the floor.

We don't even make it to the couch though. I can't. Her tits are pushed up in a red lace bra, and for a second I think I'll finish right there. I've never been this excited.

I unhook the bra with ease, and as it drops to the floor I can tell she's nervous. She's biting on her lip as I stare at her, almost as if she's insecure.

"So unbelievably sexy." I mutter, reattaching my lips with hers.

We make it to the kitchen, and her back is pressed against the countertop. I bend down and grab a handful of her breast, sticking my mouth on her nipple. She's squirming with desire as I suck, lick and bite it.

"Cam, yes." She sighs and throws her head back, and I groan at how badly I want her. How badly I want to please her.

I grab both breasts now and move my tongue back and forth to cover both of them. Her fingers are in my curls, pulling on them to let out her frustration.

Never have I cared about pleasing someone this much, but with Maddie I want to make sure she's completely satisfied. Watching her is addicting.

"I love that I'm your first." I say lowly and move my lips to her ear as I find the waistband of her sweatpants. "Can I finish you off properly this time?"

With two fingers, I pull her waistband back and look at her for permission. She gasps at the expression on my face. I'm not sure what it is, but I'm all in this moment with her. There is nowhere else I'd rather be.

"Yes." It comes out as a choked whisper, but it's all I need.

Finally, I move the lace of her panties to the side, sliding my fingers up and down her soaking wet slit.

Good god.

I laugh, and Maddie shoots me a death glare.

"What?" She asks.

I find her clit, and it's practically throbbing for me. From her tits, to her soaking wet pussy, I'm in utter disbelief.

"You are going to be dangerous as hell for me." I find myself saying, but before she can reply I push a finger inside of her, my dick pulsating when she moans again.

She's still on her feet, and I'm staring directly down at her as she's pressed against my chest, my finger feeling just how tight she really is.

I want to be inside of her. I want to feel her wrapped around me.

She's a virgin though. I have to keep reminding myself of that. Doing this with her is one thing. Taking her virginity is a whole different story.

"You like that?" I cock my head to the side as I carefully watch her face. My finger is pumping slowly in and out, and her mouth is parted, her breathing rapid.

I want to feel her orgasm around me. I want to feel all of that wetness she gave me in the closet. I want to do so much to her.

"Fuck this." I growl and drop to my knees in front of her, ripping down her sweatpants and underwear.

Her pussy is so pretty, just like I knew it would be, glistening right before my eyes. I don't give Maddie an opportunity to question what I'm doing before I stick my tongue directly onto her.

"Oh!" Her back arches off the counter, her fingers wrapping into my curls once more. "Cam, oh my god."

She tastes so sweet, and I look up at her as I swirl my tongue around her clit. I'm hardly able to see her face from how big her tits are, and I lean up to grab one, playing with her nipple.

She's squirming so much that I finally have to release her nipple and grab onto her ass with both of my hands to completely engulf myself in her. She's so damn wet, and she's fucking hot.

"Cam!" She cries out, her legs beginning to shake.

Yes.

That's right.

Come for me.

I feel myself finish right in my pants as I await her release, my moans coming out right into her pussy.

She didn't even touch me.

I didn't even touch myself.

"Fuck!" She screams, her fingertips clutching onto the countertop, her eyes rolling into the back of her head as she comes right onto my tongue.

My eyes don't leave hers as I get every last drop of her, loving the sweetness she gave me. She's flinching from being so sensitive, so I finally pull away, still on my knees in front of her.

She's completely naked in my kitchen, and I drink her body in, trying to remember every last detail.

"Um, thank you." She says shyly, her cheeks a bright pink when she sees me checking her out. "I didn't get to help you though."

Her eyes drop down to my pants, but when she sees the stain from where I've already come her cheeks get even redder. "Oh." She smiles. "Never mind."

I stand back up to my feet and grab her chin to bring her to my lips.

"If you tell anyone about that..." I chuckle and place a gentle kiss to her lips. "I'll kill you."

"That's never happened before?"

Is she serious?

That's not a normal thing to finish without anyone or anything touching me. She's innocent though, and she doesn't know much.

I want to teach her it all.

"Maybe when I was thirteen and had just discovered playboy for the first time?" I half heartedly laugh. "No, Maddie. That's never happened with anyone."

She seems proud of herself, and she should be.

"Well, good." She states and bends down to pick up her underwear and pants from the floor, quickly putting them back on. "I think we should keep this a secret for now."

I think back to moments ago, my face suffocated by her pussy. If Ethan found out he'd murder me.

"Agreed." I nod. "I should probably go shower. I kind of need to throw these pants in the wash now."

"Oh, right." She clears her throat and goes to find her bra over by the living room, and I watch her hook it on quickly.

Why is she in a rush?

"Are you okay?" I ask.

She slides the sweatshirt over her head and looks at me as if I'm crazy.

"Um, I'm leaving?"

"Why?" I find myself asking.

She continues to look at me like I've lost my mind, and I suddenly know exactly what she's thinking. I never stick around after I finish. I never have a girl continue to hang out with me, but Maddie isn't the other girls. I've known Maddie forever, and we're trying to be friends again, right?

Friends with... benefits?

I don't know what we are, but I go to the front door and grab her backpack that's on the floor.

"You want me to stay?" She gets that little smile on her face. The smile that says she's about to get what she wants.

"You can study while I take a shower." I shrug. "Then maybe we can watch a movie or something? Have you had dinner?"

She shakes her head.

"Okay... then we can order your favorite. Pizza?"

"Sure." She nods, the smile still plastered onto her face.

It makes me feel so good to know that she's happy. She's happy because of me, and I want to make sure I continue to do that as long as possible.

I go ahead and order the pizza with some of the cash my dad left for me before I shower as quickly as possible. I decide to leave my shirt off, wearing only a pair of sweatpants when I go back downstairs to her.

She's got three textbooks spread across the couch, a notebook placed across her lap as she sits cross legged. Her hair is still crazy from what we did earlier, and my heart leaps into my chest.

What the hell?

"Are you good?" She furrows her eyebrows together in confusion when I'm just standing at the bottom of the staircase looking dumbfounded.

"Uh, yeah." I scratch the back of my head and continue to look at the spread of textbooks she has. "You have a test or something?"

"Kind of. I'm studying for the PSAT's next month."

"Oh okay, so bore things, then?"

She grabs a pillow off the couch and chucks it at me. "Shut up!" She giggles.

I dodge it and collapse down beside her, pushing one of the textbooks onto the floor. Studying to her is important, and I can respect that, but it's not like her test is tomorrow. I want to spend time with her.

Tugging onto her elbow, I pull her down so that her head is in my lap, a textbook still in her hands as I lean over to grab onto the remote.

It seems like she's in a zone, so I decide to let her continue and flip to a random movie. Even though we aren't talking, I still feel close to her like this. Closer than I have with anyone.

As I relax more into the couch, I find myself playing with her blonde ringlets, wrapping strands around my finger. I could get used to this. I hate being home alone, but with Maddie here I feel... comfortable. I can't explain it.

"Would you stop?" She looks up at me, finally pulling her attention away from the textbook. "You're very distracting."

"Am I?" I flirt, running the back of my finger down her neck, circling around her collarbone. I trace her soft, olive skin, infatuated with how it feels on my fingertips. "Would you like me to stop, Mads?"

She gulps hard before there's a knock at the door. Our pizza.

"You are very lucky for interruptions." I chuckle.