I was staring at the coffee maker waiting patiently for the bean water I needed to wake up. For my own sanity, I didn't look at my Social Media because I knew rumors were spreading. I awaited a phone call from my brother but Nick stayed away this time around. I wondered if I messed things up by not answering his call and then not returning his call. I needed to make things up. I couldn't lose my best friend. The coffee was nearly done and it was almost sad how excited I was about that. The shrill sound of my doorbell echoing through the room made me jump. I had a feeling it was Nick since he showed up unannounced from time to time. Last time it was Joy who paid me a visit but I doubted she'd be here again. I left my coffee and answered the door, surprised to see my mom standing before me looking all fabulous and very professional. She probably decided to pay me a visit before heading into the office.

It meant that I messed up.

I held the door open, inviting mom to enter, "Come in, I'm making coffee. Do you want a cup too?"

"Sounds lovely, honey."

Mom was being nice so she'd carefully address the situation. I appreciated that. I made my way into the kitchen while mom got comfortable in the living room. I poured coffee into our mugs, made the coffee the way we liked it and then joined mom in the living room.

"Thank you." She took the mug I offered her.

I sat down beside her, staring down at the hot liquid in my mug so I didn't have to see the disappointment in her eyes.

"How are things with Lucas?" Mom asked.

"Not that great." I admitted to her, "We had an argument the other day about our future and I haven't talked to him ever since." I didn't want to lie about my relationship to her because I was very tempted to accept Jacob's offer. She'd find out the truth because I doubted Lucas would cover up for someone like me.

"What exactly was the argument about?" Mom asked, looking curious.

She didn't look upset with me, she was merely there to listen. It was such a relief that she didn't get angry with me already. It made me feel more comfortable to talk about what was actually going on in my life.

"I want to get married and have kids in the near future while Lucas hasn't made up his mind about those things." I clutched my mug and tried to sip my coffee. It was hot but little sips worked out fine. It warmed me up from the inside out, making me feel better, "We didn't talk about it after the argument because I kicked him out."

"Nina." The sigh which followed told me mom was disappointed about that.

"I was really upset but I know that's no excuse."

"It's good that you know that you didn't handle it well." Mom also sipped her coffee, she talked to me in a soft voice, "You should apologize for that but I think it's good that you know where you are both standing."

"Mom." I trailed off.

The gleam in her eyes told me that she knew there was more to the story. She didn't push me, she waited for me to speak up.

"Jacob Blackwood proposed to me."

I leaned back as I watched mom cough, she choked in her coffee with me announcing that so casually. I probably should have been more subtle about it. I just didn't know how to be subtle about another man proposing to me. Someone mom and dad were close to and respected. I could see a rainbow of emotions flash through her eyes. She then settled down and flashed me a little unsure smile. The calmness I felt from her a minute ago slipped away. She tried to hide her confusion but I could feel it radiating off her.

"H-How did that happen, sweetheart?"

"I don't want you to get upset with me," I whispered.

Mom reached for me, placing her hand on my arm and giving it a gentle squeeze, "How could I get upset with my daughter? There is nothing we can't fix together."

I shook my head, "I've been really confused lately. I know what I want but I know it's probably not the right decision. I should go for the safe option and I'm happy with the safe option but it turns out that the safe option might not be as safe as I thought it would be. It turns out that what I desire is more open and honest."

Mom tried to hide her laughter but she couldn't. She snorted, clearing her throat and quickly sipping her coffee to hide her grin altogether. I smiled in response, it was contagious seeing mom so cheerful.

"So you're talking about the men in your life." Mom clarified, "Lucas turns out to be hiding things from you while Jacob has been honest about things? Is that right?" She asked.

I finished my coffee, feeling sad I had no more. I shouldn't have another cup though, it wasn't good for me. I put it away on the coffee table and tucked my legs under me on the couch as I got more comfortable. I felt like talking to a friend which was weird since mom and I were never this close. We were close but I never openly talked to her about what was going on in my life. It felt really liberating, especially since mom wasn't taking it personally at all.

"Nick found out that Jacob had an ulterior motive. I asked Jacob about it and he told me the truth without sugar-coating it. He does need to marry me so his reputation doesn't fall apart. It turns out that he slept with his assistant and she wants to sue him. If people hear about it things will get really bad for him."

"Nina, if you accept that you're giving more than he's offering."

"Just a minute." I got up and jogged to my room, grabbed the contract Jacob handed me and met up with mom again. I handed her the contract knowing she had the knowledge to advise me about it, "Jacob was aware of what he is asking of me so he wanted to compensate me."

Mom took the contract from me and started to read through it, "Does he also offer you want you want?"

He knew I wanted more than sex and he offered that. I know for Jacob the whole perfect family image will help him out. There are old school people out there who think young CEOs are more reliable if they have their private life together. Jacob might not want the family life for the same reasons as me but he wanted it.

"Yes."

"You realize that he might be offering it for the wrong reasons."

"I'm aware."

Mom looked up from the contract I handed her, "To me, it sounds like you already made up your mind but are looking for confirmation from the people close to you."

"That might be right," I muttered.

"It is your life, Nina. You don't need me to tell you if you should or shouldn't accept Jacob's proposal She placed the contract on her lap, "This is very straightforward. You are getting shares in his company. You also get compensated for any children you will give him."

"What?"

Mom smiled, "He is also going to pay you for having his kids."

I reached for the contract and scanned through it, "So it is more like a business deal."

Mom nodded, finishing her coffee and placing the cup on the coffee table, "Basically." She looked at me and cupped my cheek, "Honey, marriage, and kids is tough. It's hard work. It will be easier and more rewarding if you do those things with someone you can rely on."

"I can rely on Jacob."

She smiled at me and pulled away, she got to her feet and straightened her jacket. She pulled herself back together, looking like the confident business woman she was. I also got to my feet so I could walk her out.

"It seems to me that you already know what you want so let me give you the push you need." She grabbed my hands and held onto them gently, "Don't mind the people around you and what they will say. Make the decision that you want and give it your all. Don't have any regrets." She pulled away and collected her bag, "Now I have to head to the office."

"Thank you, mom."

I saw mom off and got ready for the day. I had some shopping to do for my new client. I also needed to suck it up and invite Lucas over to let him know about the decision I made. It was going to be awful and I dreaded it but I couldn't move forward if I didn't have the conversation with him.

I called Lucas after dinner, asking him to come over. He sounded distant over the phone, colder. Maybe he knew why I called him over. The entire time I was waiting for him to arrive my heart was racing and my stomach hurt. I was so nervous I was getting physically ill. I had to bite through it. Around eight Lucas showed up, I offered him tea or coffee. He didn't need anything, his distant behavior told me he definitely knew.

"How are you?" He asked.

We sat down in the living room. A lot happened in this room in a short period of time. When I told Jacob about my decision things would change drastically. I was sure he'd want me to move to the penthouse. He was definitely not going to live in this tiny apartment with me. I could leave this room behind with all the memories. It actually felt good to me.

"Good." The small talk was awkward but it was better than to just jump right into the break-up, "How are you?"

"Polly is very demanding right now, she has a packed schedule so I've been driving around town."

"You've been busy then."

He chuckled, the sound sounding cold and the smile which followed definitely didn't reach his eyes, "So have you apparently."

It wasn't odd that he knew about my meeting with Jacob, I'm sure everyone in the city knew about my meeting with the man. I still hadn't looked at my Social Media today. I was scared to see what people thought of us meeting up. I knew what they said about the women in Jacob's life. I had been one of them making fun of the women who dared to imagine a future with the man. He offered me a future though. I'd like to think that I was different from them. The people didn't know that though so they might be tearing my image apart right now.

"Yeah, me too." I shifted awkwardly in my seat, "I've made my decision."

The impassive mask which slipped on Lucas' face told me that he was already prepared for this, "It was always him, right?" Lucas asked, "I never stood a chance."

"No, it's not that." I hated how I was looking to make excuses. I should have given him the time to get everything off his chest and then let him walk out of my life but I wanted him to know the truth even though I knew he'd never accept it, "I wanted us to work out. I wanted a future with you."

"So one argument about our future and you go running to Jacob Blackwood?"

The sarcasm in his tone was so sharp it stabbed right through me. I couldn't blame him for being a little mean, I was breaking up with him to marry another man. I made him believe we'd be together forever or at least that we were involved in a very serious relationship. I honestly believed that too but like he said it probably always had been Jacob Blackwood. All I did was waiting for that man to offer me more than sex. It was pathetic probably but I've chosen him and I wouldn't regret it.

"I want to marry him," I admitted to Lucas.

"Of course you do." Lucas got up, "I hope you get what you want out of this."

I would have handled it better if his parting words were mean and vicious. He sounded genuine about his wish for me which made it so hard. I was in pain, my heart ached and tears were threatening to spill from my eyes. Lucas left with another word and I could cry my eyes out for what could have been. Then I'd never look back and focus entirely on my life with Jacob Blackwood.