After the maids help me into a new dress and fixed my hair, the Prince entered with several servants rushing to set down the plates of hot food on the table. The smell caused my stomach to rumble loudly. I felt embarrassed but no one dared to laugh while Prince went to lifted me from the bed and carried me to the table of food. Sitting there with so many dishes, I swallowed hard wondering if this was all a trick.

"Why aren't you eating?"

"C_ can Ruyi eat?"

"Why are you asking such a stupid question?"

Everyone fell to their knees when the Prince shouted angrily at me. Just as I thought he was going to take all the food from me, he sat down hard beside me and pick up a chopstick. I watched quietly when he begins to put food in my bowl.

"Eat or I'll force it down your throat"

When I took the first bite, I felt so relieved. Not daring to reach for any of the plate further than I can reach, I ate quietly. The entire time, the Prince moved the dishes that were out of reach and placed it in front of me.

"Enough"

I was full and was forcing myself to eat more. I don't know if I will be fed like this again later.

"Over eating will only get you sick. Bring us tea"

The prince took my bowl and chopsticks away while the servants quickly cleaned up.

"Don't be foolish next time. If you're hungry, order the servants to bring you your meal" He scolded with a hard tap on my forehead. "You're the mistress in this estate, who would dare deny you food"

That was new information for me. Someone had always brought me food so I had thought meals were served at certain time. When he had been angry, I figured it was his way of punishing me. My grandmother and father's wife was the same way when they're upset with me.

"Are you listening?" He tapped at my forehead again.

I nodded quietly and sip on the cup of tea. I hadn't noticing that he was observing me until an abrupt touched on my neck made me dropped the cup. I was suddenly afraid the man sitting beside me would be angry at my clumsiness.

"I only touch your neck and you react like this"

I looked at him wondering why he wasn't upset. Then his hand cupped my cheek and he leaned down close. I couldn't move or look away. I became scared when his face was inches away from me. His face was so close I could feel his breath.

"Don't forget you were given to me to be my woman. Do you know the meaning of belonging completely to a man?"

I was forced to look into his intimidating sharp eyes.

"If you want to live peacefully, learn to please me" He continued slowly. "That means in and out of bed"

Hearing his words, I begin to shake.

"Blame your precious father. He was the one who gave you to this Prince"

My father was never precious to me.

"Look at me"

I hadn't realized I wasn't. My eyes were empty until they focused on his.

"Did you inherit these eyes from your mother?"

I didn't understand his sudden change in question.

"No..."

My mother's eyes were black. My father eyes were dark brown. My eyes used to be the same color as my father before the poison changed it.

"Umm..." He hummed softly to my response.

I tried to pull away when I felt his lips leaning in closer.

"You are not allowed to refuse me" He held onto my cheek firmly, keeping me still.

I was never allowed to refuse anyone, anything. Even my own body – all my life, it's been used and abused. Why I am not allowed to have one thing that belongs solely to me? All I asked is the right to my own body.

"Please..." I said with my eyes closed tight right before his lips touched me. "Just kill me"

When my pleading was met with cold silence, I shivered. I was afraid to open my eyes. Only when his hand dropped from my cheek and the heat of his lips no longer close to mine that I opened my eyes to look at him.

"If you rather die than become my woman, why did you come here at all?"

I could hear the deadly intent behind his calm cold voice.

"Answer me"

He was the only person I know who did not like my silence. My family never wanted me to speak at all.

"Ruyi had nowhere else to go" I answered faintly.

He laughed coldly.

"If you want to stay, you will learn to accept all of me"

I was reminded that I had nothing. To live, I have to be used.

Will it be like this for the rest of my life?

"Can Ruyi leave?"

He slammed his fist onto the wooden table, destroying it completely. When the servants tried to clean up, he told everyone to leave.

"Don't test my patience" With one hand, he grabbed hold of my neck and squeezed hard while he spoke. "Don't think I won't kill you"

I never doubted that he wouldn't kill me. Ever since I first saw him, I had wondered when will his anger take over and end my life. As he squeezed my neck harder, I didn't resist. The last thought in my mind before I fell unconscious was where I will go after death.