I flinch every time someone walks past the door, praying it is not the traitorous doctor who will expose my shame. Mouse hasn't spoken in hours, his face is blank with guilt and horror. I begged him not to blame himself, but of course he did.

Liam cried himself to sleep an hour ago, his face is pressed against my chest, his little fists gripping at my top like he's scared I will disappear. He's right I suppose. There's a very real possibility as the doctor could arrive any minute.

My turmoil of expectancy is broken when the door opens and a man in a sterile coat follows Him through the door. I start trembling, my body can't stop it.

"P-please..." I whimper.

Neither of the men speak but, once again Mouse is yanking against his chains, fighting to get free.

My arms are grabbed and held above my head as Liam is shifted harshly from my stomach. My T-shirt is ripped up to my chin as I thrash against the hands. A cold gel is poured over my stomach, it burns on my skin and I cry out. Legs kick out towards any moving shape, but I'm too weak, too feeble to do any serious damage.

The wand is pressed onto my stomach and my secret is revealed.

"It's a girl." The doctor states coldly as the tears pour down my face.

A tutting fills the room. "You've disappointed me Astrid, what was your job again?" His voice sneers at me. "You knew you had a bitch growing in you, didn't you?"

His hands are around my throat now, squeezing tighter and tighter until all I can do is wheeze for even the slightest gasp of breath. He releases me roughly, throwing my body backwards so my head slams into the damp wall behind me.

Spots and darkness cloak my vision as I desperately try to keep my eyes on Liam and Mouse, if I lose sight of them anything could happen. But the darkness is too deep and consuming.

Gasping for air, I watch as Liam is snatched from beside me. I reach for him, but my movements are sluggish and lagged. Like I'm trapped in a loop of flickering reality.

My head won't stop spinning. I drop my head onto the wire frame with a deep gasp. The darkness of the spots engulfs me.

"Wake up bitch!" His voice is as harsh and unforgiving as the water he has dumped on my head. It's so cold my head aches with it as I once again find myself deprived of oxygen.

"I've had a little thought." He gloats as he looks down at what I can only assume is my pathetic form. "Maybe a girl could be useful, always good to have a bargaining chip ain't it?"

Disgust and nausea rise like bile from my stomach but I keep my lips tightly shut as I frantically nod my head. I will do anything to keep us all alive until Vidar finds us.

"But of course you don't get this for free."

"I'll do anything... p-please."

This dark light grips his features and my moment of resolution melts away. His fist grabs my hair and hauls me from the bed.

My feet don't touch the floor and I scream and desperately grip my hair to stop the ripping feeling.

I am dropped before Mouse and I try to crawl towards him, but his fist tightens even more around my scalp and I moan in pain.

"It's a simple transaction darlin'. Only two of you make it out of here." I look up into Mouse's eyes, he smiles softly and nods his head.

"It's ok girlie, save your baby. Don't worry about me."

I shake my head fervently but tremble and pause when I feel the barrel of the gun against my stomach.

"One of us is going to pull the trigger, Astrid." He drawls as I shake my head in utter denial. "You just get to decide who does the honours." To emphasise his point he drives the metal deeper into my side and I thrive in pain.

I can't do this.

But I can't lose my daughter.

Mouse smiles at me once again and nods gently.

"Please girlie, I need you to do this for me. Because I won't live with myself if I live and she doesn't. Now come on. Please!"

Watching Mouse beg me to end his life, utterly destroys my soul.

I am strong.

I need to protect my children.

I am their mother.

I reach for the gun with a pallid hand. He chuckles evilly and thrusts it into my open palm.

Clutching the handle, I direct it towards Mouse, begging him for to forgive me.

"Nothing to forgive girlie. You be strong now."

My sobs are blurring my very vision as they fall so thick and heavy.

A shot fires.